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It can be satisfying to see a niche thing you love – a book, a band, an artist – become popular in the mainstream. Yet it can also be upsetting. You root for their success for so long, but once everybody knows about them, it doesn't feel as special. That's gatekeeping, the grown-up cousin of "You can't sit with us."

But there is a community that doesn't gatekeep: the Gates Open, Come In subreddit. It's where people invite each other to like and enjoy stuff others might tell them is inappropriate or uncool, and generally have each other's backs. Like the kids say these days, "In the clurb, we all fam."

Bored Panda got in touch with one of the community's moderators, u/Merari01, and they kindly agreed to tell us more about the subreddit. Read our short chat with them below!

#1

If Anybody Has A Problem With That I'm Going To Let It Go

A person defending their role as a Disney-loving parent in an online comment.

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u/Merari01 told us that the theme of the subreddit drew them to become one of the moderators for the community. "The internet can be a negative place, full of angry people and content, which in some form makes people feel excluded," they told us via a message. "This subreddit is positive, inclusive, and shows a welcoming atmosphere."

The Redditor believes that people want their feeds to have more positivity. "Having a space that is explicitly inclusionary resonates with a lot of them," the netizen added. While moderating the subreddit's comment section can sometimes be challenging when members get into petty arguments, u/Merari01 is pretty happy with the job overall. "It's a fun space to be in, so, it's not a real challenge."

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    Dogs And Cats My Favorite Animals

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    We can gatekeep many things: the recipe for our favorite pasta, where we bought our fabulous shoes, our favorite sports teams, and many other things. In 2022, Vogue actually chose "gatekeep" as the word of the year. What, according to them, used to mean institutions or people withholding power now means not sharing information or access to something.

    On TikTok, not gatekeeping means sharing where you got that sweater from and how much your tickets to see Taylor Swift cost. But Vogue writes that this is slightly ironic: if anything, the app made information and the world itself more accessible than ever. "Want to find out where a media-only fashion party or sample sale preview is taking place? You can probably hunt down the invite on TikTok."

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    Licensed psychologist and lecturer on the psychology of metal and punk rock Steve Byrne explains that social psychologists have observed our tendency to divide into groups. We make friends with people who have similar interests and outlooks on life, and we align ourselves against those who are different.

    Byrne points to the Robbers Cave experiment, carried out in the 1950s. In it, social psychologist Muzafer Sherif studied 22 boys who, during the experiment, divided themselves into in and out-groups. It reflected the most basic truth that we divide ourselves according to many things: political beliefs, likes and dislikes, and even for the benefit of our own social standing.

    #7

    Everything Turned Out Just Fine, Then

    Tweet from Laurie sharing a wholesome dad's supportive response to coming out as trans.

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    #8

    Struggle Has No Inherent Value

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    Byrne writes that it's natural for us to see those who are different from us as a threat. Then we want to appear stronger, more sophisticated, and cooler in front of them. And that's where gatekeeping comes in. In essence, we gatekeep because we're insecure. Putting others down is one of the ways we cope with insecurities. "At least we're not as bad as them," we comfort ourselves.

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    Perhaps now more than ever, division into insiders and outsiders is hurting us all around the world. Byrne suggests that some political leaders thrive on sowing division with the "us against them" mentality. In reality, there must be very little that's actually different about us.

    #13

    What An Adorable Man Doing Such A Lovely Thing ❤️😍🥰

    Elderly man with vitiligo crochets dolls for children with the condition, displaying wholesome support online.

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    #14

    It Got A Little Aggressive, But I Like The Message

    People celebrating a Hindu wedding, highlighting cultural appreciation and support in an online discussion.

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    "Those who are seemingly kept out by these gatekeepers might be seeing the gate as some hulking castle drawbridge, sealed up tight and ready to defend a kingdom against marauders when it’s really just a broken garden fence, easily stepped over," Byrne writes.

    Interestingly, some people see gatekeeping as a good thing. In an article for The Cut, Ann Friedman suggests that some communities gatekeep to preserve their culture. She writes about Anthony Bourdain worrying about sending tourist masses to mom-and-pop restaurants, as well as Black creators feeling conflicted when white creators use their aesthetics, language, and memes and calling it appropriation.

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    #21

    Emotional Rollercoaster! (Pls Remove If Posted Before)

    Wholesome online exchange about greener grass, highlighting personal growth and resilience with playful commentary.

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    Kelly Elizabeth Wright, a lexicographer with the American Dialect Society, explained that gatekeeping in this context gives minorities back that little bit of power they lose in this age of vast media consumption. "You could be making a piece of content that is for other Black people or for your community, but then it's public or it gets algorithmically exposed. There is less control in the way social media is surfaced and served to people."

    #22

    Luke Skywalker Makes Young Star Wars Fan Feel Loved

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    Sirena Bergman writes for Business Insider that the boom in tourism in Hawaii during the pandemic caused native Hawaiians and Pacific Islanders to "gatekeep" the state. The natives talked about the rise of COVID-19 cases and the environmental impacts of tourism and asked people not to travel there, but still faced backlash.

    #25

    You're Not A Machine. You're Garden

    Wholesome tweet offering support, comparing people to gardens with varying needs, encouraging self-care and growth.

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    #27

    You Don't Have To Be Good At Something To Enjoy Doing It

    Text encouraging self-expression and enjoyment over perfection, emphasizing it's okay to not be good at everything.

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    That's how "gatebreaking" came to TikTok, the opposite of gatekeeping. The idea is that there should be no barriers to information, expertise, places, or knowledge. But Bergman observes that there's more nuance to this problem. While being against gatekeeping is, in essence, standing against inequality, it's alright for some people to sometimes stay on the fringes of certain spaces.

    However, in most cases, the old cliche "sharing is caring" might just be true. Sharing information, access, knowledge, and just genuinely having each other's backs. If this wholesome list is right up your alley, Pandas, check out the previous ones that we've done about the "Gates Open, Come On In" community here and here!

    #33

    Definitely Mercedes! Wait...what?

    Two cars parked side by side with a tweet emphasizing inclusivity over stereotypes.

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    #38

    I'm Sure Many Of Us Needed To Hear This

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    #39

    As Someone Who's Gone For 6 Years, It Really Does Make A Difference

    Wholesome online support: a tweet emphasizes that therapy is beneficial for everyone, not just those with "issues."

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    #41

    Sometimes You Win Sometimes You Learn

    Tweet expressing willingness to explain the difference between science fiction and fantasy in a wholesome way.

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    #45

    Japan/America Cultural Exchange

    Online support for embracing Japanese culture with wholesome cultural exchanges discussed in a Tumblr post.

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    #46

    Something Wholesome From Facebook

    Animals exchanging wholesome online advice, with a cat, leopard, tiger, and lion using laptops.

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    #48

    Women Wearing What They Like In Peace

    Two girls in Halloween costumes promoting self-expression and non-judgment in a wholesome illustration.

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    #50

    A Wheelchair Accessible Swing At A Public Park

    Accessible swing in playground showing someone having another's back in a wholesome way.

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    #53

    At The Minnesota United Game Last Night

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    #56

    You Are Still Valid No Matter What

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    This New Train Station Has Baby Changing Stations In Both Restrooms

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    Just Like The Pied Piper LED Rats Through The Streets... 🎵🎵

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    #63

    Metallica Invites Y’all To Come On In

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    #64

    Super Mario Chess Has No Time For Gender Stereotypes

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    #66

    The R/Crochet Community Is Very Wholesome

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    #69

    It's A Big Ask But I'm Behind It

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    #70

    Sharing A Love Of Music Does Not Have To Be Limited By Genre

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    #72

    Vent’s Open Come On In

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    #75

    I Found This Lifesaver Gummies Packaging Very Wholesome :)

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    #76

    The Country "Georgia" 🇬🇪 Or The State Of "Georgia" 🇺🇲?

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    #79

    April Fools 😁

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    #81

    This One Has Been A Long Time Coming

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    #83

    A Surprise, To Be Sure, But A Welcome One

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    #84

    A Little Body Positivity From 1977

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    #87

    Don’t Let Anyone Make You Feel Bad For Feeling Bad. These Are Big Things And It’s Normal To Be Upset

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    #90

    Anyone Can Appreciate Kind Words ❤️

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    #91

    People Who Know How To Sew But Don't Call Themselves Girls Are Also Valid, We Love You Too :)

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    #95

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    Just Tell People Their Shirts Are Cool!!

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    #98

    Old Players 🤝 New Players

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    #99

    Narcissistic Survivors Have My Heart

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