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50 People Who Had Someone Else’s Back Online And Did It In The Most Wholesome Way (New Pics)
Interview
It can be satisfying to see a niche thing you love – a book, a band, an artist – become popular in the mainstream. Yet it can also be upsetting. You root for their success for so long, but once everybody knows about them, it doesn't feel as special. That's gatekeeping, the grown-up cousin of "You can't sit with us."
But there is a community that doesn't gatekeep: the Gates Open, Come In subreddit. It's where people invite each other to like and enjoy stuff others might tell them is inappropriate or uncool, and generally have each other's backs. Like the kids say these days, "In the clurb, we all fam."
Bored Panda got in touch with one of the community's moderators, u/Merari01, and they kindly agreed to tell us more about the subreddit. Read our short chat with them below!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
If Anybody Has A Problem With That I'm Going To Let It Go
u/Merari01 told us that the theme of the subreddit drew them to become one of the moderators for the community. "The internet can be a negative place, full of angry people and content, which in some form makes people feel excluded," they told us via a message. "This subreddit is positive, inclusive, and shows a welcoming atmosphere."
The Redditor believes that people want their feeds to have more positivity. "Having a space that is explicitly inclusionary resonates with a lot of them," the netizen added. While moderating the subreddit's comment section can sometimes be challenging when members get into petty arguments, u/Merari01 is pretty happy with the job overall. "It's a fun space to be in, so, it's not a real challenge."
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#2
Inclusion
#3
Dogs And Cats My Favorite Animals
We can gatekeep many things: the recipe for our favorite pasta, where we bought our fabulous shoes, our favorite sports teams, and many other things. In 2022, Vogue actually chose "gatekeep" as the word of the year. What, according to them, used to mean institutions or people withholding power now means not sharing information or access to something.
On TikTok, not gatekeeping means sharing where you got that sweater from and how much your tickets to see Taylor Swift cost. But Vogue writes that this is slightly ironic: if anything, the app made information and the world itself more accessible than ever. "Want to find out where a media-only fashion party or sample sale preview is taking place? You can probably hunt down the invite on TikTok."
#4
Finally Someone Who Gets It!
#5
Happy Lunar Year Everyone
Robert Trebor 2 weeks ago
Someone with authority setting an example for self-styled dictators. Bravo.
Licensed psychologist and lecturer on the psychology of metal and punk rock Steve Byrne explains that social psychologists have observed our tendency to divide into groups. We make friends with people who have similar interests and outlooks on life, and we align ourselves against those who are different.
Byrne points to the Robbers Cave experiment, carried out in the 1950s. In it, social psychologist Muzafer Sherif studied 22 boys who, during the experiment, divided themselves into in and out-groups. It reflected the most basic truth that we divide ourselves according to many things: political beliefs, likes and dislikes, and even for the benefit of our own social standing.
#7
Everything Turned Out Just Fine, Then
#8
It's Never Too Late
#9
Struggle Has No Inherent Value
Byrne writes that it's natural for us to see those who are different from us as a threat. Then we want to appear stronger, more sophisticated, and cooler in front of them. And that's where gatekeeping comes in. In essence, we gatekeep because we're insecure. Putting others down is one of the ways we cope with insecurities. "At least we're not as bad as them," we comfort ourselves.
#10
Literally The Gate Was Open
#11
Mentally Empathetic Dad
#12
Brooklyn Librarians Subverting Censorship & Allowing Any Teenager In America To Have A Library Card
Mochi 2 weeks ago
In my town there's a new library with a room with access to free wifi, coding programs, a 3-d printer, and of course e-books, books, C-ds, and audiobooks. There's also a genealogy center so you can trace your heritage and a teen room with games and crafts. There's also private study rooms, and conference rooms, and there's classes for everything imaginable. And it's all free with a library card!
Perhaps now more than ever, division into insiders and outsiders is hurting us all around the world. Byrne suggests that some political leaders thrive on sowing division with the "us against them" mentality. In reality, there must be very little that's actually different about us.
#13
What An Adorable Man Doing Such A Lovely Thing ❤️😍🥰
quentariel 2 weeks ago
Amigurumi in this size and complexity takes a lot of time. This man is not only thoughtful and kind but also really skilled.
#14
It Got A Little Aggressive, But I Like The Message
MicrowaveGoddess 2 weeks ago
I'm Indian and 100% approve of this message. Culture is something to be shared, no kept exclusive.
#15
For The Waiters
Julia Mckinney 2 weeks ago
The above reason plus I used to work the same type of jobs and know how hard it can be.
"Those who are seemingly kept out by these gatekeepers might be seeing the gate as some hulking castle drawbridge, sealed up tight and ready to defend a kingdom against marauders when it’s really just a broken garden fence, easily stepped over," Byrne writes.
#16
Just Let Them Be They
#17
Stress Relief
Kise Miarse 2 weeks ago
I really thought that as a grown a*s adult I wouldn't encounter this so much anymore. LET PEOPLE LIKE THINGS. It doesn't mean it has to become your obsession - you can still enjoy something just for what it is.
#18
Friendly Incentive
kath morgan 2 weeks ago
Cutting down on beef in particular is a great place to start. You don’t need to commit to total veganism to make positive changes!
Julia Ford 2 weeks ago
Pigs are where to start! I know… bacon! But I gave up eating anything pig after watching videos of them being gassed to death, I don’t miss it at all.
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Oskar vanZandt 2 weeks ago
Caution to all: ultra processed food and sugar are enemies to all... Vegan, vegetarian or omnivore.
Child of the Stars 2 weeks ago
That's how I feel about everything in the climate debate. I see a lot of people argue things like "giving up plastic straws is stupid because the real problem is the big oil companies (or whatever)!" While it is very true that the ones who will make the biggest impact on climate change are the biggest corporations, that doesn't mean that I shouldn't do what I can to reduce where I can. At the very least, it helps reduce my anxiety over a huge problem over which I have little control.
ucp 2 weeks ago
Exactly. I do what I can. The single biggest thing I did was move a (fairly significant) investment portfolio to one that actively avoids things like fast fashion (as well as the obvious arms, tobacco, etc). If more of us do this, then the more disruptive companies will have to change.
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detective miller's hat 2 weeks ago
If you live somewhere that it won't break your budget, you can also make more responsible choices about where you get your animal products. I live in the country close to a lot of farms and buying meat and dairy and eggs directly from the farms is often cheaper than the supermarket, and I know that the animals had a pretty nice life out in the fields before they became my dinner. The dairy farm up the road even lets me say hi to the cows. Jersey cows are lovely, and very appreciative of neck rubs.
Julia Ford 2 weeks ago
Small family-run farms are night and day better than the factory farms. The factory farms are actual hell.
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Kurtz Frausun 2 weeks ago
I switched my breakfast and lunch everyday to Vegan and only have meat in moderation (once every 2 weeks and chicken or fish twice a week). You don't have to be a hardcore radical to improve yourself and those around you.
Panda Panda Bo Banda 2 weeks ago
I can't own an electric vehicle so I drive a hybrid. Doing half is better than none at all.
Angela C 2 weeks ago
My friend was vegan-ish for a while. What that looked like for her was she didn't go out of her way to eat animal products but if she was, say, craving a steak, she'd eat that steak. Then she got pregnant and just started eating pretty much everything again and now she's an omnivore again
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martin734 2 weeks ago
I too am vegetarian and not vegan. Cheese on toast, Margherita pizza, boiled and scrambled eggs and honey on toast are all far too good to give up. I know there are vegan alternatives to these but I have found them to be a poor and pale imitation of the real thing.
Nikole 2 weeks ago
Yeah, I’m a vegetarian. I just buy pasture raised eggs.
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Leesa DeAndrea 1 week ago
I recently found a new to me music artist that I really like, Ren Gill. I commented on one of his videos that I was slowly exploring his songs. And someone urged me not to do that, to dive in & watch as much as I could. I'm still doing it my way, slowly, watching & rewatching, getting to know his work. He's amazing, by the way, IMO.
Janet Graham 1 week ago
Hahahahha! Do you mean to tell me that grown-up adults ever eat something they don't like? It sounds more like they want to sound like they are on board but are far from it. Please say the same thing...I really don't want to be diabetic, but I just love bread and sugar too much!...I really don't want to be an alcoholic but I just love wine too much. How about my favorite, I make my living raising quality beef on a small farm. I have a waiting list for my butcher beef, hogs, and turkeys. I make many people's lives healthier by providing great meat and healthy vegetables.
Fat Harry (Oi / You) 2 weeks ago
Yes. This is a good message. We're cutting back on meat as a family (except one member, but that's his problem) and have at least 2 vegetarian (sometimes vegan) meals a week. Some weeks it's three or more, particularly for some family members. However, eggs and cheese are a large part of that, but I still feel it's a step in the right direction.
Pandamonium Pandas Pandie 2 weeks ago
I want to be vegetarian, but I love abuelita's poyo y carne asada wayyyy toooo much...as well as wing stop...and seafood....
LB 2 weeks ago
According to the logic of this post you can still have those things and ditch everything else.
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Bobert Robertson 2 weeks ago (edited)
As someone who is nearly a carnivore, are there alternatives to brussel sprouts, asparagus, and the other veggies I like in a meat alternative?
Jaya 2 weeks ago
You know how they make fake meat made from vegetables? Someone did the same thing but in reverse: fake carrots made from meat. It s not actually for sale, it was just a statement or joke or something. It's so silly, I love it. My boyfriend is a vegan and he almost fell from his chair laughing.
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Gandalf the Pink 2 weeks ago
Oh no I won't get olympic gold in veganism this way? Aaw man...
Load More Replies...Interestingly, some people see gatekeeping as a good thing. In an article for The Cut, Ann Friedman suggests that some communities gatekeep to preserve their culture. She writes about Anthony Bourdain worrying about sending tourist masses to mom-and-pop restaurants, as well as Black creators feeling conflicted when white creators use their aesthetics, language, and memes and calling it appropriation.
#19
Every Job Is Valid!
Beak Hookage 2 weeks ago
I went to an expensive private school and can tell you for a fact that quite a few of the other kids ultimately went to trade school instead of university. And are now gainfully employed. (Ironically, I got three degrees and am currently... not employed).
#20
Shout Out To The Solo Eaters
HighNMightyBigshotBossOfWorld 2 weeks ago
I don’t understand how people don’t do what they want to do because they don’t have someone to do it with. They lose so much.
#21
Emotional Rollercoaster! (Pls Remove If Posted Before)
Did I say that out loud? (he/him)cis/het 2 weeks ago
*Hoping the neighbours don't notice the suspiciously green patches *
Kelly Elizabeth Wright, a lexicographer with the American Dialect Society, explained that gatekeeping in this context gives minorities back that little bit of power they lose in this age of vast media consumption. "You could be making a piece of content that is for other Black people or for your community, but then it's public or it gets algorithmically exposed. There is less control in the way social media is surfaced and served to people."
#22
Luke Skywalker Makes Young Star Wars Fan Feel Loved
#23
Depression Gateopening
Sergy Yeltsen 2 weeks ago
People at work wouldn't think I have MDD. It's easy to hide while others are around. It's when I'm home by myself that it comes to the fore. This is a perception that needs to change.
#24
That's His Whole Thing
Sirena Bergman writes for Business Insider that the boom in tourism in Hawaii during the pandemic caused native Hawaiians and Pacific Islanders to "gatekeep" the state. The natives talked about the rise of COVID-19 cases and the environmental impacts of tourism and asked people not to travel there, but still faced backlash.
#25
You're Not A Machine. You're Garden
#26
Moms,,,/-
Pandemonium 2 weeks ago
I would have been able to finish the butter if they hadn't ganged up on me
#27
You Don't Have To Be Good At Something To Enjoy Doing It
Kise Miarse 2 weeks ago
I need more upvotes to give. When I was younger, so many things I enjoyed were ruined by other people's negative reactions. We're not all born being perfect at everything. Let others enjoy. Let them learn. Don't be a d*ck.
That's how "gatebreaking" came to TikTok, the opposite of gatekeeping. The idea is that there should be no barriers to information, expertise, places, or knowledge. But Bergman observes that there's more nuance to this problem. While being against gatekeeping is, in essence, standing against inequality, it's alright for some people to sometimes stay on the fringes of certain spaces.
#28
Pls Info Dump On Me I Love It
Kise Miarse 2 weeks ago
I always start off so excited to share my nerd sh*t and then get self-conscious that nobody probably wants to hear it and I don't want to be "that guy" so I taper off. It makes me sad though.
#29
Slow Down
#30
Drink What You Like!!!
However, in most cases, the old cliche "sharing is caring" might just be true. Sharing information, access, knowledge, and just genuinely having each other's backs. If this wholesome list is right up your alley, Pandas, check out the previous ones that we've done about the "Gates Open, Come On In" community here and here!
#31
Words To Live By
Glen Ellyn 2 weeks ago
"Be kinder than necessary. Everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."
#32
Good Parentin
Glen Ellyn 2 weeks ago
Oops. I first read it as "There is a family next to me at the stove." My thought was, I hope it's your family! 🤭🤦🏻♀️ Now that I've confessed my reading blunder, this kid has a great dad!
#33
Definitely Mercedes! Wait...what?
#35
Sh*tter’s Open!
Libstak 2 weeks ago (edited)
I've never understood the toilet issues. I mean if you have male and female guests in your home they all use the one bathroom and nobody blinks. Nobody checks their friends and family for proper hygiene eitquette in some questionnaire or some c**p before they come either, they are literally unknown in their toilet habits and everybody is just okay. So wtf with the outrage everywhere else?
#36
Found My Weekend Plans
#37
Really Behind You
#38
I'm Sure Many Of Us Needed To Hear This
Donkey boi 2 weeks ago
My lane is supporting all of youse on the internet and wasting the trolls' time, when I get a little spare time. Because I simply don't have the time (and truthfully, often can't be arsed) to be "active".
#39
As Someone Who's Gone For 6 Years, It Really Does Make A Difference
Susie Elle 2 weeks ago
Waiting for my ADHD/depression/whatever it is diagnosis (or no diagnosis, perhaps) :) Due to insane waiting lists I'm only due october next year, but I guess that's something.
#41
Sometimes You Win Sometimes You Learn
#42
Another Good One From Tumblr
#43
All Fans Welcome
#45
Japan/America Cultural Exchange
#46
Something Wholesome From Facebook
#47
Do You, No Matter What!
#48
Women Wearing What They Like In Peace
Donkey boi 2 weeks ago
A unicorn onesie would be pretty awesome. I wonder if they do them in my size?
#49
Gay Body Shaming Is Real
Add New Image
What do you think ?
Not-a-Clue (she/her) 2 weeks ago
THIS is what BP used to be all about. Really positive. More, please.
Kylie Chapman 2 weeks ago
Is feeling hemochromatoicy the appropropriate term for the not being able to access more meme’s about inclusion because they’re now caught behind a Paywall? Is there another more appropriate term for too much irony? Or do we just now use the term “Panderish?”
Makenzie McNeal 4 days ago
I love how this has 50 items and only the 50th one is cut off. lol.
Kare Deter 2 weeks ago
BP WTAF!?!?! Unless I subscribe I have no access to MY OWN FREAKING POSTS or responses to them once you cut the original post from 99 to 50? On top of everything else, you don't DESERVE anyone's money for stealing material, repackaging it and calling it "writing". UTTER BS. Your ADS support your service stop being such twatwaffles.
Forrest Hobbs 2 weeks ago
Chill, dude. You can see your own posts (albeit not in context) by looking at your user page. Meanwhile - well, you say BP doesn't deserve any money for providing this small service for us? And then go on to say that BP gets "support" (that is, money) from advertising? Do you not see a small inconsistency? Everything costs money. Posting a comment here on BP costs money - paid by BP, mostly from ad revenue. Just - hey, chill a bit?
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Not-a-Clue (she/her) 2 weeks ago
THIS is what BP used to be all about. Really positive. More, please.
Kylie Chapman 2 weeks ago
Is feeling hemochromatoicy the appropropriate term for the not being able to access more meme’s about inclusion because they’re now caught behind a Paywall? Is there another more appropriate term for too much irony? Or do we just now use the term “Panderish?”
Makenzie McNeal 4 days ago
I love how this has 50 items and only the 50th one is cut off. lol.
Kare Deter 2 weeks ago
BP WTAF!?!?! Unless I subscribe I have no access to MY OWN FREAKING POSTS or responses to them once you cut the original post from 99 to 50? On top of everything else, you don't DESERVE anyone's money for stealing material, repackaging it and calling it "writing". UTTER BS. Your ADS support your service stop being such twatwaffles.
Forrest Hobbs 2 weeks ago
Chill, dude. You can see your own posts (albeit not in context) by looking at your user page. Meanwhile - well, you say BP doesn't deserve any money for providing this small service for us? And then go on to say that BP gets "support" (that is, money) from advertising? Do you not see a small inconsistency? Everything costs money. Posting a comment here on BP costs money - paid by BP, mostly from ad revenue. Just - hey, chill a bit?
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