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It can be satisfying to see a niche thing you love – a book, a band, an artist – become popular in the mainstream. Yet it can also be upsetting. You root for their success for so long, but once everybody knows about them, it doesn't feel as special. That's gatekeeping, the grown-up cousin of "You can't sit with us."

But there is a community that doesn't gatekeep: the Gates Open, Come In subreddit. It's where people invite each other to like and enjoy stuff others might tell them is inappropriate or uncool, and generally have each other's backs. Like the kids say these days, "In the clurb, we all fam."

Bored Panda got in touch with one of the community's moderators, u/Merari01, and they kindly agreed to tell us more about the subreddit. Read our short chat with them below!

#1

If Anybody Has A Problem With That I'm Going To Let It Go

If Anybody Has A Problem With That I'm Going To Let It Go

Hotchi_Motchi Report

u/Merari01 told us that the theme of the subreddit drew them to become one of the moderators for the community. "The internet can be a negative place, full of angry people and content, which in some form makes people feel excluded," they told us via a message. "This subreddit is positive, inclusive, and shows a welcoming atmosphere."

The Redditor believes that people want their feeds to have more positivity. "Having a space that is explicitly inclusionary resonates with a lot of them," the netizen added. While moderating the subreddit's comment section can sometimes be challenging when members get into petty arguments, u/Merari01 is pretty happy with the job overall. "It's a fun space to be in, so, it's not a real challenge."

#3

Dogs And Cats My Favorite Animals

Dogs And Cats My Favorite Animals

mccurry8 Report

We can gatekeep many things: the recipe for our favorite pasta, where we bought our fabulous shoes, our favorite sports teams, and many other things. In 2022, Vogue actually chose "gatekeep" as the word of the year. What, according to them, used to mean institutions or people withholding power now means not sharing information or access to something.

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On TikTok, not gatekeeping means sharing where you got that sweater from and how much your tickets to see Taylor Swift cost. But Vogue writes that this is slightly ironic: if anything, the app made information and the world itself more accessible than ever. "Want to find out where a media-only fashion party or sample sale preview is taking place? You can probably hunt down the invite on TikTok."

Licensed psychologist and lecturer on the psychology of metal and punk rock Steve Byrne explains that social psychologists have observed our tendency to divide into groups. We make friends with people who have similar interests and outlooks on life, and we align ourselves against those who are different.

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Byrne points to the Robbers Cave experiment, carried out in the 1950s. In it, social psychologist Muzafer Sherif studied 22 boys who, during the experiment, divided themselves into in and out-groups. It reflected the most basic truth that we divide ourselves according to many things: political beliefs, likes and dislikes, and even for the benefit of our own social standing.

#7

Everything Turned Out Just Fine, Then

Everything Turned Out Just Fine, Then

MoralRelativity Report

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#9

Struggle Has No Inherent Value

Struggle Has No Inherent Value

r_I_reddit Report

Byrne writes that it's natural for us to see those who are different from us as a threat. Then we want to appear stronger, more sophisticated, and cooler in front of them. And that's where gatekeeping comes in. In essence, we gatekeep because we're insecure. Putting others down is one of the ways we cope with insecurities. "At least we're not as bad as them," we comfort ourselves.

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#11

Brooklyn Librarians Subverting Censorship & Allowing Any Teenager In America To Have A Library Card

Brooklyn Librarians Subverting Censorship & Allowing Any Teenager In America To Have A Library Card

Goodable Report

Perhaps now more than ever, division into insiders and outsiders is hurting us all around the world. Byrne suggests that some political leaders thrive on sowing division with the "us against them" mentality. In reality, there must be very little that's actually different about us.

#13

What An Adorable Man Doing Such A Lovely Thing ❤️😍🥰

What An Adorable Man Doing Such A Lovely Thing ❤️😍🥰

mrbuh Report

#14

It Got A Little Aggressive, But I Like The Message

It Got A Little Aggressive, But I Like The Message

ThatDapperAdventurer Report

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"Those who are seemingly kept out by these gatekeepers might be seeing the gate as some hulking castle drawbridge, sealed up tight and ready to defend a kingdom against marauders when it’s really just a broken garden fence, easily stepped over," Byrne writes.

Interestingly, some people see gatekeeping as a good thing. In an article for The Cut, Ann Friedman suggests that some communities gatekeep to preserve their culture. She writes about Anthony Bourdain worrying about sending tourist masses to mom-and-pop restaurants, as well as Black creators feeling conflicted when white creators use their aesthetics, language, and memes and calling it appropriation.

#19

Emotional Rollercoaster! (Pls Remove If Posted Before)

Emotional Rollercoaster! (Pls Remove If Posted Before)

r_I_reddit Report

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#20

Luke Skywalker Makes Young Star Wars Fan Feel Loved

Luke Skywalker Makes Young Star Wars Fan Feel Loved

MarkHamill Report

Kelly Elizabeth Wright, a lexicographer with the American Dialect Society, explained that gatekeeping in this context gives minorities back that little bit of power they lose in this age of vast media consumption. "You could be making a piece of content that is for other Black people or for your community, but then it's public or it gets algorithmically exposed. There is less control in the way social media is surfaced and served to people."

#23

You're Not A Machine. You're Garden

You're Not A Machine. You're Garden

joynessthebrave Report

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Sirena Bergman writes for Business Insider that the boom in tourism in Hawaii during the pandemic caused native Hawaiians and Pacific Islanders to "gatekeep" the state. The natives talked about the rise of COVID-19 cases and the environmental impacts of tourism and asked people not to travel there, but still faced backlash.

That's how "gatebreaking" came to TikTok, the opposite of gatekeeping. The idea is that there should be no barriers to information, expertise, places, or knowledge. But Bergman observes that there's more nuance to this problem. While being against gatekeeping is, in essence, standing against inequality, it's alright for some people to sometimes stay on the fringes of certain spaces.

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However, in most cases, the old cliche "sharing is caring" might just be true. Sharing information, access, knowledge, and just genuinely having each other's backs. If this wholesome list is right up your alley, Pandas, check out the previous ones that we've done about the "Gates Open, Come On In" community here and here!

#31

You Don't Have To Be Good At Something To Enjoy Doing It

You Don't Have To Be Good At Something To Enjoy Doing It

r_I_reddit Report

#33

Definitely Mercedes! Wait...what?

Definitely Mercedes! Wait...what?

TheRudePenguin Report

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#36

Sh*tter’s Open!

Sh*tter’s Open!

jumbosnookums_ Report

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Libstak
Community Member
1 day ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've never understood the toilet issues. I mean if you have male and female guests in your home they all use the one bathroom and nobody blinks. Nobody checks their friends and family for proper hygiene eitquette in some questionnaire or some c**p before they come either, they are literally unknown in their toilet habits and everybody is just okay. So wtf with the outrage everywhere else?

Jessica SpeLangm
Community Member
20 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think the problem in public restrooms is that it is a lot less private. In someone's home, the door can be closed and locked. Not always the case in public restrooms.

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Tabitha
Community Member
18 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The people who think trans women using women’s bathrooms are going to be attacking the women and girls in them have it all wrong. Sexual predators, including pedophiles, who would dress up as women to gain entry into those bathrooms would be so incredibly obvious they’d give themselves away. Why? Because trans women are living as the women they actually are meant to be. They would be in those bathrooms to do their bathroom business and leave just like every other woman and girl in there. They won’t be hanging around and they won’t be bothering anybody, ffs, or they’d be immediately reported to the business’ management and security sent to get them out of there and escort them off the premises—-if not have them arrested. Besides, women are more apt to help and protect another woman, and a trans woman, who is becoming the gender she should have been born as, would simply be another woman joining the sisterhood, and therefore protect another woman, not attack her, ffs. Also, have you noticed how the people against trans women going into women’s bathrooms are oddly silent about trans men going into men’s bathrooms?

Nikole
Community Member
4 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If I were a trans woman I’d be scared as shít having to use a men’s bathroom, considering the violence against trans women in particular.

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EmJay
Community Member
14 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Found a sticker in a bathroom saying this, guess what guys I WAS FINE

Jaya
Community Member
17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The only place you're sharing, is the place where you stand in line or wash your hands. And if people have to use the bathroom of their birth sex, that means that trans men have to use the women's bathrooms, so there'd be even MORE male-looking people in the women's bathroom. And if trans people aren't allowed to use bathrooms at all, that means that trans people simply CANNOT go to university or shopping or a night out.

Smeghead Tribble Down Under
Community Member
21 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Love it. Piddle in whatever toilet you want, with whatever you want...just don't miss! :D

J. Maxx
Community Member
16 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

One thing I have noticed in most cases the attacks on the Trans community are always against Trans-Women. The sports bans are mostly against Trans-Women. Misogyny even in their anti-Trans hatred.

CP
Community Member
18 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Where are my "bathrooms are sacred holy places" brigade on BP. Always love sparring with them.

Certainly not Dan
Community Member
11 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The concern, generally, is not that people with genuine body-dismorphia use toilets of the opposite sex (not gender, biological sex), it’s that it can be misused by males. The acceptance now is that if I, a middle aged man with a beard dresses as a woman then I am a woman so long as I say I am. Clearly this is open to misuse by a subset of males who are not to be trusted. It is not transphobia to say that some males will exploit anything available to gain access to women’s spaces. This all needs to be carefully negotiated, without the current hyperbole associated with the whole discussion. I wait to be downvoted into oblivion

LakotaWolf (she/her)
Community Member
8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm not going to downvote you, but I do ask - because some cisgender males are perverts who will commit crimes in a bathroom, we should shut out ALL of the transgender community?

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#38

As Someone Who's Gone For 6 Years, It Really Does Make A Difference

As Someone Who's Gone For 6 Years, It Really Does Make A Difference

CarolGeorgese Report

#39

I'm Sure Many Of Us Needed To Hear This

I'm Sure Many Of Us Needed To Hear This

demandingultimatum Report

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#43

Japan/America Cultural Exchange

Japan/America Cultural Exchange

baxil Report

#44

Sometimes You Win Sometimes You Learn

Sometimes You Win Sometimes You Learn

thehideousprse Report

#46

Something Wholesome From Facebook

Something Wholesome From Facebook

ObsessedStock98 Report

#48

Women Wearing What They Like In Peace

Women Wearing What They Like In Peace

Pumaheart Report

#50

A Wheelchair Accessible Swing At A Public Park

A Wheelchair Accessible Swing At A Public Park

Turkeycirclejerky Report

Note: this post originally had 99 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.

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