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It can be satisfying to see a niche thing you love – a book, a band, an artist – become popular in the mainstream. Yet it can also be upsetting. You root for their success for so long, but once everybody knows about them, it doesn't feel as special. That's gatekeeping, the grown-up cousin of "You can't sit with us."

But there is a community that doesn't gatekeep: the Gates Open, Come In subreddit. It's where people invite each other to like and enjoy stuff others might tell them is inappropriate or uncool, and generally have each other's backs. Like the kids say these days, "In the clurb, we all fam."

Bored Panda got in touch with one of the community's moderators, u/Merari01, and they kindly agreed to tell us more about the subreddit. Read our short chat with them below!

u/Merari01 told us that the theme of the subreddit drew them to become one of the moderators for the community. "The internet can be a negative place, full of angry people and content, which in some form makes people feel excluded," they told us via a message. "This subreddit is positive, inclusive, and shows a welcoming atmosphere."

The Redditor believes that people want their feeds to have more positivity. "Having a space that is explicitly inclusionary resonates with a lot of them," the netizen added. While moderating the subreddit's comment section can sometimes be challenging when members get into petty arguments, u/Merari01 is pretty happy with the job overall. "It's a fun space to be in, so, it's not a real challenge."

We can gatekeep many things: the recipe for our favorite pasta, where we bought our fabulous shoes, our favorite sports teams, and many other things. In 2022, Vogue actually chose "gatekeep" as the word of the year. What, according to them, used to mean institutions or people withholding power now means not sharing information or access to something.

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On TikTok, not gatekeeping means sharing where you got that sweater from and how much your tickets to see Taylor Swift cost. But Vogue writes that this is slightly ironic: if anything, the app made information and the world itself more accessible than ever. "Want to find out where a media-only fashion party or sample sale preview is taking place? You can probably hunt down the invite on TikTok."

#6

Happy Lunar Year Everyone

Happy Lunar Year Everyone

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Robert Trebor
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Someone with authority setting an example for self-styled dictators. Bravo.

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Licensed psychologist and lecturer on the psychology of metal and punk rock Steve Byrne explains that social psychologists have observed our tendency to divide into groups. We make friends with people who have similar interests and outlooks on life, and we align ourselves against those who are different.

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Byrne points to the Robbers Cave experiment, carried out in the 1950s. In it, social psychologist Muzafer Sherif studied 22 boys who, during the experiment, divided themselves into in and out-groups. It reflected the most basic truth that we divide ourselves according to many things: political beliefs, likes and dislikes, and even for the benefit of our own social standing.

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Byrne writes that it's natural for us to see those who are different from us as a threat. Then we want to appear stronger, more sophisticated, and cooler in front of them. And that's where gatekeeping comes in. In essence, we gatekeep because we're insecure. Putting others down is one of the ways we cope with insecurities. "At least we're not as bad as them," we comfort ourselves.

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#11

Brooklyn Librarians Subverting Censorship & Allowing Any Teenager In America To Have A Library Card

Brooklyn Librarians Subverting Censorship & Allowing Any Teenager In America To Have A Library Card

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Mochi
Community Member
20 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In my town there's a new library with a room with access to free wifi, coding programs, a 3-d printer, and of course e-books, books, C-ds, and audiobooks. There's also a genealogy center so you can trace your heritage and a teen room with games and crafts. There's also private study rooms, and conference rooms, and there's classes for everything imaginable. And it's all free with a library card!

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Perhaps now more than ever, division into insiders and outsiders is hurting us all around the world. Byrne suggests that some political leaders thrive on sowing division with the "us against them" mentality. In reality, there must be very little that's actually different about us.

#13

What An Adorable Man Doing Such A Lovely Thing ❤️😍🥰

What An Adorable Man Doing Such A Lovely Thing ❤️😍🥰

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quentariel
Community Member
21 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Amigurumi in this size and complexity takes a lot of time. This man is not only thoughtful and kind but also really skilled.

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#14

It Got A Little Aggressive, But I Like The Message

It Got A Little Aggressive, But I Like The Message

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MicrowaveGoddess
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm Indian and 100% approve of this message. Culture is something to be shared, no kept exclusive.

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"Those who are seemingly kept out by these gatekeepers might be seeing the gate as some hulking castle drawbridge, sealed up tight and ready to defend a kingdom against marauders when it’s really just a broken garden fence, easily stepped over," Byrne writes.

#18

Stress Relief

Stress Relief

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Kise Miarse
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I really thought that as a grown a*s adult I wouldn't encounter this so much anymore. LET PEOPLE LIKE THINGS. It doesn't mean it has to become your obsession - you can still enjoy something just for what it is.

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Interestingly, some people see gatekeeping as a good thing. In an article for The Cut, Ann Friedman suggests that some communities gatekeep to preserve their culture. She writes about Anthony Bourdain worrying about sending tourist masses to mom-and-pop restaurants, as well as Black creators feeling conflicted when white creators use their aesthetics, language, and memes and calling it appropriation.

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#21

Every Job Is Valid!

Every Job Is Valid!

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Beak Hookage
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I went to an expensive private school and can tell you for a fact that quite a few of the other kids ultimately went to trade school instead of university. And are now gainfully employed. (Ironically, I got three degrees and am currently... not employed).

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Kelly Elizabeth Wright, a lexicographer with the American Dialect Society, explained that gatekeeping in this context gives minorities back that little bit of power they lose in this age of vast media consumption. "You could be making a piece of content that is for other Black people or for your community, but then it's public or it gets algorithmically exposed. There is less control in the way social media is surfaced and served to people."

#22

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

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HighNMightyBigshotBossOfWorld
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don’t understand how people don’t do what they want to do because they don’t have someone to do it with. They lose so much.

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#24

Depression Gateopening

Depression Gateopening

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Sergy Yeltsen
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People at work wouldn't think I have MDD. It's easy to hide while others are around. It's when I'm home by myself that it comes to the fore. This is a perception that needs to change.

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Sirena Bergman writes for Business Insider that the boom in tourism in Hawaii during the pandemic caused native Hawaiians and Pacific Islanders to "gatekeep" the state. The natives talked about the rise of COVID-19 cases and the environmental impacts of tourism and asked people not to travel there, but still faced backlash.

That's how "gatebreaking" came to TikTok, the opposite of gatekeeping. The idea is that there should be no barriers to information, expertise, places, or knowledge. But Bergman observes that there's more nuance to this problem. While being against gatekeeping is, in essence, standing against inequality, it's alright for some people to sometimes stay on the fringes of certain spaces.

#28

Pls Info Dump On Me I Love It

Pls Info Dump On Me I Love It

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Kise Miarse
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always start off so excited to share my nerd sh*t and then get self-conscious that nobody probably wants to hear it and I don't want to be "that guy" so I taper off. It makes me sad though.

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#30

Words To Live By

Words To Live By

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Glen Ellyn
Community Member
Premium
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Be kinder than necessary. Everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."

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However, in most cases, the old cliche "sharing is caring" might just be true. Sharing information, access, knowledge, and just genuinely having each other's backs. If this wholesome list is right up your alley, Pandas, check out the previous ones that we've done about the "Gates Open, Come On In" community here and here!

#31

You Don't Have To Be Good At Something To Enjoy Doing It

You Don't Have To Be Good At Something To Enjoy Doing It

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Kise Miarse
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I need more upvotes to give. When I was younger, so many things I enjoyed were ruined by other people's negative reactions. We're not all born being perfect at everything. Let others enjoy. Let them learn. Don't be a d*ck.

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#32

Based College Rule

Based College Rule

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Captain McSmoot
Community Member
17 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Except the simple fact that a creep could just be going into the bathroom to catch a peek or worse. Mindlessly downvote and/or lazily label as whatever "phobic" you wish, but this can happen and does happen. Giving people the blanket statement to shut up and move on is dangerous.

Nikole
Community Member
4 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Really, Captain? Is this an epidemic? Because there were SO MANY guys wearing wigs and dresses in order to pretend to be female to assault women before trans rights became more prevalent…

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Mental Liberals
Community Member
9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nope! I don't want a guy in the bathroom with my daughter! Sorry!! Disagree...go to the bathroom you have the parts for...whether medically added, removed, etc....

LakotaWolf (she/her)
Community Member
8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Trans women are women. Trans men are men. Women with penises exist. Men with vaginas exist. No one is defined only by what they have between their legs. Google someone named Buck Angel and go ahead and make that same ignorant statement you just made. Buck Angel has a vagina. Would you want Buck Angel in the same bathroom as your daughter? Buck Angel is a trans man and would be using the men's bathroom, since, you know, he's a man, but if we followed YOUR bigoted statement, he would be using the ladies' restroom with your daughter.

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Eugenia
Community Member
9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Since creepy people exist, the best solution imo is having 3 choices: male, female, gender neutral. And, of course, never leave young children go alone in public restrooms. You could accompany them in the gender neutral regardless of your and their gender/sex

7cs56n9t6w
Community Member
Premium
9 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sorry but I don’t want to pee knowing that in the next cabin is a pooping guy. Or sorry I don’t want to poop and fart next to a peeing man meeting him later when washing my hands.

LakotaWolf (she/her)
Community Member
8 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm assuming by that statement that you are a woman. If there is a trans woman in the bathroom with you, there ISN'T a "pooping guy" in the stall next to you. There is a "pooping woman" in the stall next to you.

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#34

Good Parentin

Good Parentin

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Glen Ellyn
Community Member
Premium
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oops. I first read it as "There is a family next to me at the stove." My thought was, I hope it's your family! 🤭🤦🏻‍♀️ Now that I've confessed my reading blunder, this kid has a great dad!

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#36

Sh*tter’s Open!

Sh*tter’s Open!

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Libstak
Community Member
1 day ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've never understood the toilet issues. I mean if you have male and female guests in your home they all use the one bathroom and nobody blinks. Nobody checks their friends and family for proper hygiene eitquette in some questionnaire or some c**p before they come either, they are literally unknown in their toilet habits and everybody is just okay. So wtf with the outrage everywhere else?

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#38

As Someone Who's Gone For 6 Years, It Really Does Make A Difference

As Someone Who's Gone For 6 Years, It Really Does Make A Difference

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Susie Elle
Community Member
1 day ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Waiting for my ADHD/depression/whatever it is diagnosis (or no diagnosis, perhaps) :) Due to insane waiting lists I'm only due october next year, but I guess that's something.

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#39

I'm Sure Many Of Us Needed To Hear This

I'm Sure Many Of Us Needed To Hear This

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Donkey boi
Community Member
22 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My lane is supporting all of youse on the internet and wasting the trolls' time, when I get a little spare time. Because I simply don't have the time (and truthfully, often can't be arsed) to be "active".

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#44

Sometimes You Win Sometimes You Learn

Sometimes You Win Sometimes You Learn

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arthbach
Community Member
23 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Often a very easy way to spot the difference is fantasy uses 'gold' or 'crowns', and sci-fi uses 'credits'.

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#48

Women Wearing What They Like In Peace

Women Wearing What They Like In Peace

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Donkey boi
Community Member
22 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A unicorn onesie would be pretty awesome. I wonder if they do them in my size?

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#50

A Wheelchair Accessible Swing At A Public Park

A Wheelchair Accessible Swing At A Public Park

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Huddo's sister
Community Member
21 hours ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's gotta be the least secure wheelchair swing I've seen though...We have had wheelchair swings where I live since before my older brother died (2002) so I've seen a lot. I do like they also have the other adapted accessible swing next to it though, those are less common.

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Note: this post originally had 99 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.

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