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To put it simply, gatekeeping is an act when someone takes it upon themselves to decide who does or does not have access or rights to a community or identity ("You can't be a real Phoebe Bridgers fan, you just discovered her. Real fans follow her since at least Stranger in the Alps.") If this sounds ridiculous to you, don't worry. You're not alone.

There's a subreddit called r/GatesOpenComeOnIn and it describes itself as the polar opposite of gatekeeping. Created in 2018, this online community collects and shares pictures of wholesome acts of kindness when people had each other's backs. Whether it's encouraging everyone to share their Spotify Wrapped or simply allowing someone to feel tired, it doesn't take much to acknowledge another person's emotions, thoughts, experiences, values, and beliefs. Continue scrolling and check out how it's done.

#1

Wholesome Patriotism

Wholesome Patriotism

EpicJenko Report

As you can see from the pictures, empathy goes a long way. Developing it is crucial for establishing relationships and behaving compassionately. Since empathy involves experiencing another person’s point of view, rather than just one’s own, it enables prosocial or helping behaviors that come from within, rather than being forced.

Sadly, some surveys indicate that empathy is on the decline in the United States and elsewhere. But at least these findings motivate parents, schools, and communities to support programs that help people of all ages enhance and maintain their ability to walk in each other’s shoes.

#2

Halloween For Everyone!

Halloween For Everyone!

bunman21 Report

#3

Come On In And Long As You’re Nice

Come On In And Long As You’re Nice

thefamilyjewelz Report

Empathy really is a superpower: it helps us cooperate with others, build friendships, make moral decisions, and intervene when we see others being bullied.

Humans usually begin to show signs of empathy in infancy and the trait develops steadily through childhood and adolescence.

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That being said, most people are likely to feel greater empathy for someone like themselves and may feel less empathy for those outside their family, community, ethnicity, or race.

#4

Everybody Say Thank You To Andy

Everybody Say Thank You To Andy

Awesome123310 Report

#5

Making Your Child Happy

Making Your Child Happy

sonic_banana Report

#6

Minding Your Own Business Is Free

Minding Your Own Business Is Free

Thoeda Report

Like other traits, empathy may have evolved with a selfish motive: using others as a "social antenna" to help detect danger. From an evolutionary point of view, creating a mental model of another person's intent is critical: the arrival of an interloper, for example, could be deadly, so developing sensitivity to the signals of others could be life-saving.

Babies display an understanding that people’s actions are guided by intentions and can act on that understanding before they turn 18 months old, including trying to comfort a parent. Advanced reasoning about other people’s thoughts develops around age 5-6.

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#7

Bikinis For Boys

Bikinis For Boys

vacillate321 Report

#8

Gates Open Slide On In!

Gates Open Slide On In!

Dragonography Report

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#9

Read Whatever You Want

Read Whatever You Want

ineed_somelove Report

Experts say that people high in narcissism, or who have a narcissistic personality disorder, can exhibit empathy and even compassion. However, that ability only goes so far, as ultimately they prioritize their own needs.

Some researchers believe narcissists can become more empathetic by developing greater self-compassion, which can increase their own feelings of security and self-worth and enable them to open up to hearing others.

#10

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

Shout Out To The Solo Eaters

benImran17 Report

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Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This made sense in 2018 when eating in restaurants was normal.

Ryan Michael
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

*Dramatic flashback to when we could step out of our houses without having the risk of catching a deadly disease or running into idiots who dont believe in science.*

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Night Owl
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a phase in high school and first years of college when I loved going to opera and operetta and I wen't to theater alone (except for the two times that I dragged my brother with me). I eventually realized it's too expensive to continue

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Anni
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Eating alone during office's lunch break sometimes gives you the only 20 min that day when you don't have to talk or listen carefully...

J9
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I actually enjoy eating alone in a restaurant, and going to the movies alone too. Its 'me' time and it helps.

Brendan Hills
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love eating alone in restaurants. It is, sorry, was, one of my favourite parts of business travel.

Robert T
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Likewise. I used to actively go out and find different restaurants to eat in each night. So many fantastic cities and towns.

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MadamButterfly
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Times were good in the year 2019 BC (Before Covid), I often ate out alone.

cassiushumanmother
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep! Eating alone in restaurant is awesome. I used to do it sometimes when i was the chief of mayors office for lunch break. Eating a good meal, quietly, in a nice restaurant instead of eating chinese noodles at my desk while working was so GOOD!

Ozacoter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I loved traveling and eating out alone. It gives you so much space and freedom. Its a relaxing time when you dont need to compromise and just spoil yourself.

Valley Girl
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Guess what? I have a job. My job is 80% on the phone. When I take my lunch, I have no desire to talk. Eating alone, in peace is the best part of my work day.

Erik Granqvist
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Only problem is to find a restaurant that actually make better food then the wife. Or me, for that matter. We are into cooking heart and soul.

Kadie Goodwin
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ummm.....may I please know what heart and soul taste like? I really want to know if I’ll like them ☺️

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Hugh Cookson
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was single, I used to love going out to eat alone !! It did help that I was working as a highly paid (and pressured) Chef at the time, with only one day off a week, and as all of the other staff at this particular Hotel / Restaurant had families or were generally working it was expedient for me to dine alone, where and when I wanted and what style of food - I tasted some astonishing dishes over the 3 years I was there and was inspired to add many of the dishes I tried at that time on to subsequent menus that I've designed and implemented ... Good times !!

Martha Higgins
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i like eating alone in a restaurant. I can order and eat what I like without reproach, I can read while I eat, I can enjoy my surroundings without having to talk, I can enjoy the music, I can enjoy people watching or a great view.

CincyReds
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thank you! I love t go out by myself. Just something I enjoy I just go sit at the bar and have great conversations with everyone there!

Mama Panda
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Says the man to the lady. The stigmas are different for each gender as well as each circumstance. So what I am getting is that if you are a man, then whatever you do is labeled as confident but if you are a Lady, then you are weak. When doing comparisons, try to use the same gender. It will only then make the message more positive.

Javiera Gotelli
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why would it be "something"? Eating is a basic need. You eat whenever and wherever you want. Alone or with company.

Celeste Grant
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not everyone has someone to eat with, but everyone has to eat. We need to stop judging people amd start letting people do what they need to do.

Joshua Selbitschka
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I eat in restaurants alone all the time. Because my work schedule is vastly different from everyone else that lives with me. And I like it that way. I can read what I wish or play a little game while waiting. Because my interactions are mostly online, restaurants are my bit of alone time. And I get a tasty meal at usually good prices at the same time.

Mewton’s Third Paw
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Eating alone in a restaurant is just fûcking EATING! Maybe they are busy or want to be alone but not at home, or maybe they have nobody to eat with. What difference does it make?

Deirdre Tallott
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It is actually incredibly empowering to eat at a restaurant on your own!

Bonni Poch
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Eating alone in a restaurant is a whole other level of "I don't give a f@#k. I'm hungry and need to eat." I've travelled for work and have eaten alone in a restaurant many times. It's really not a big deal. I also do movies alone.

Steve in Denver
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Several of my favorite restaurants had (before Covid) Community Tables. Even when there were two or three of us, it's where we chose to sit. No cell phones allowed, no criticism of others' comments. Two of them had decks of hand-written cards with conversation starters: news topics, ideas on how to solve world issues, where did you grow up and what do you miss?

Vicky Z
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would really love to reach this level of confidence! I guess I have to try it but I hesitate

Shirley Heyn
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Eating alone in public restaurant is just following Covid-19 rules currently.

Kathi Kemp
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's a whole nuther level of "I'm gonna do what I want and I don't care what a bunch of strangers I'll never see again think."

Jo Ellen Washburn
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was single for years and ate, saw movies, and traveled alone. It's called living my life. If you seek a spiritual experience, get out in nature by yourself. Wonderful!

Caroline Driver
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have been known to go into a restaurant, on my own, and just order dessert. It's wonderful

Bella Jones
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You also don't have to make conversation, so you can happily read your book or just enjoy your meal in peach. I love eating out with friends, but eating out solo brings its own reward.

Mary Rose Kent
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I never feel odd about eating alone—and because I have misophonia, it saves a lot of wear and tear on my frazzled nerves.

Faith Hurst-Bilinski
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had an assignment in college in the 90s to do something we were completely uncomfortable doing alone. I went to the movies. Then I went to a restaurant. I couldn't stop. That was the early 90s and I have been happy with me ever since.

Joan Forman
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a woman who ate out in restaurants for many decades. I figured, men do it all the time and no one says anything about a man reading a paper and enjoying being served. So why did I have to shop for groceries, get home from work, plan a meal, cook, and clean up ? I worked, had my own money always took a book to read. People don't generally bother someone who is reading. Also enjoyed eating out with my husband when he wasn't working. Of course there is much more prepared food available now so we might choose to get take out... and go home to be comfortable. Enjoy life, but be safe.

Christina Gude
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

.....eating out.....what's that? I can't wait!! And I eat solo plenty of times....not going to waste time waiting for others to "think about it" or being indecisive.....but again, can't wait!!!

Kim Bush
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The longer I'm out of the house the more reluctant I am to go back... Taking a deep breath, brushing away the tears as I see him pull in the driveway, that is loneliness.

MAnahP
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep. I eat alone often. I used to feel lonely, now I feel courageous.

Casey McAlister
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or going to the cinema. Some people act like you are breaking some unspoken rule by going to watch movies alone. I mean, you are supposed to watch a movie, you don't really communicate much with another person during that, so why do you necessarily need a partner for that?

Laura Alexandra
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to be so nervous to go out to eat alone. Worrying that people thought I was some lonely loser...then I realized I shouldn't care what the heck other people think. So I would enjoy going to brunch alone and work on my to do list for the dag or whatever it was that I felt like. Of course this was before the pandemic 😫

Piotr Las
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a friend cook, who would randomly call me and invite me for some food to the restaurant he's working in and i would come alone, sit at the bar, chat with the stuff and then i would go and sit in my favourite spot alone and eat. Enjoying food and looking at people passing by.

Scarlett O'Hara's Ghost
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to love going to a restaurant alone with a good book!! I also love to go to the movies alone

Toujin C'Thlu
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love eating alone in a restaurant. And just being out in public by myself. I was really sheltered when I was younger due to my parents not fully understanding my autism, so doing things without someone looking looking over your shoulder or constantly trying to 'help' feels great.

Cayley P
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love taking myself out to eat! I always pick whatever place I feel like going and I don't have to share my dessert

The_tattered_hippie
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or the other level....parenthood where you get a whole meal to yourself and it’s not interrupted by 20 trips to the bathroom 🤣

Beth Arriaga
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love eating alone. It's a very special, don't get very often at all, me time!

third molar
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Who said alone, its me and my food. We love the company of each other.

Melissa Nunya
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to love taking a good book and having breakfast by myself :) obviously it's been awhile tho

Demongrrrrl
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I rarely dined out by myself pre-Covid. Now I look forward to it. I've promised myself that I will enjoy the good things in life whether I'm with someone else or not.

Connie Martin
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've never had a problem eating alone in a restaurant. I kind of enjoy it.

Sportsgal
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I eat alone sometimes and enjoy it. Hate when hostess says, "just one?", like you have the plague or are unloved...lol!

Lunar Bicycle
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I’ve never understood the stigma. I’ll eat alone, go to the movies alone. They’re just things I enjoy doing in and of themselves, so I don’t have to have co pant to enjoy them.

El Dee
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do this myself. I don't have to wait for someone to come along and I can go where/when I want..

Jo Firth
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As is going to the movies alone, travelling alone (in the days when we could travel) and dealing with daily life alone.

Brittany
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Pre-Covid that was me. I love doing things on my own and having a ME day.

Sue Mullen Andersen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I travel a lot for work and am usually in a restaurant alone. I get to try new places that are unique to where I travel to. I don't find it lonely at all. I get to try new foods without being worried what anyone else likes!

Ami Temi
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It indeed takes a lot of confidence to eat alone in public. I used to have an eating disorder and eating while people saw me was difficult for a long time. I just couldn't do it and went hungry the entire day. Now, I'm happy to say that respecting myself and feeling comfortable in my right to exist is more important to me than what others might think. Existing as a living corpse is not a life is all I can say to summarize that. I'll now eat or drink alone or with others and not think that everyone is judging me anymore. It's freeing and feels so good.

Piet Puk
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Getting lost in a book while enjoying a wonderful meal in a restautant is a very pleasant experience.

A Jones
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wasn't afraid in the past b4 COVID-19. I'm happy with either hanging out with my mates or just relaxing alone to some good food/film.

Caitlin Youngquist
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love going out to eat by myself. It's one of my favorite things to do.

Dani Aalbertsberg
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It was so invigorating the day I realized that I could grab a book and hit a buffet while living in Vegas, and just have a relaxing lunch by myself.

A Head
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Eating alone, going to a movie alone, going for a drive alone while blasting music. sometimes you just need to be alone. There have been many days during the past year that I've had to just leave the house and walk or drive. Love my family, but 24/7 can get a little trying.

Susan Stead
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always ate in restaurants alone when I was single. I'd bring along a book and enjoy my meal. What's the big deal?

GirlFriday
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I used to LOVE eating alone in restaurants. I am around people constantly. I loved going somewhere and spending time alone and treating myself to a nice meal and a quiet hour or two.

Karl Baxter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I often ate by myself if sent away on a work related trip. Took a good book with me and read while enjoying a leisurely dinner - very relaxing and never felt uncomfortable for a moment. Everyone should try it sometime 🙂

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Do What Makes You Happy For You

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Someone I Went To School With Posted This About Giving Their Son A Unicorn-Themed Birthday Bash. Positive Parenting For The Win

Someone I Went To School With Posted This About Giving Their Son A Unicorn-Themed Birthday Bash. Positive Parenting For The Win

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"Do a thought experiment," Mark Davis, a professor of psychology who has spent decades studying empathy, said. “Imagine if humans didn’t have the capacity for empathy. What would it mean if, in fact, we never gave a damn about what happened to other people? That’s an almost an inconceivable world."

"As awful a species as we can be — and we certainly have the capacity for terrible things — we’re also capable of some pretty wonderful things, noble things, self-sacrifice."

#14

Family Is A Family Is A Family

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Never Too Late To Join A Movement

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Interestingly, the word "empathy" is relatively new. It didn’t enter the English language until the early 1900s, derived from the German word einfühlung, according to Daniel Batson, a researcher of empathy and professor emeritus at Kansas University.

#18

Felt Like This Might Belong Here

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#19

It's The Thought That Counts

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#20

Never Too Late For New Beginnings

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While some people are more naturally empathetic than others, there are easy, evidenced-based exercises that anyone can do to increase their empathy. 

First, talk to new people. Trying to imagine how someone else feels is often not enough. Luckily, the solution is simple: ask them. "For me, the core of empathy is curiosity," Jodi Halpern, a psychiatrist and bioethics professor at the University of California, Berkeley, who studies empathy, told The New York Times. "It's what is another person’s life actually like in its particulars?”

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We Are All Nerds Together

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You can start conversations with strangers or invite a colleague or neighbor you don't know well to lunch. But the trick is to go beyond small talk – ask them how they're doing and what their daily life is like.

Put away your phone and other screens when you’re having conversations, even with the people you see every day, so you can fully listen and notice their facial expressions and gestures.

Also, follow people on social media with different backgrounds than you have (different race, religion, or political persuasion). 

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Oh Thank You

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But don’t just stand in someone else's shoes, as the saying goes—take a walk in them. For example, consider attending someone else's church, mosque, synagogue, or other houses of worship for a few weeks while they attend yours, or visit a village in a developing country and volunteer.

If you don't have enough time for these activities, you can simply explore a new neighborhood, or strike up a conversation with a homeless person in your community.

If someone’s behavior is bothering you, think about why. Consider what it’s like to live their daily life.

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Showing Respect For One Another’s Professions

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Remember, you don't need to understand everything about someone to make them feel respected. Just don’t make assumptions about people based on what your life is like. The people on this list certainly haven't.

We’re all humans, and we all have a desire to connect with one another. Building our empathy, considering the perspectives of others, and opening ourselves to uncomfortable conversations can make that happen.

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Everyone Deserves The Right To Complain

Everyone Deserves The Right To Complain

imgonegg Report

#73

Nobody Cares If You Can’t Dance Well. Just Get Up And Dance

Nobody Cares If You Can’t Dance Well. Just Get Up And Dance

_alphabetagamma_ Report

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#74

Melon Flavored Jellyfish's Mom Says The Gates Are Open

Melon Flavored Jellyfish's Mom Says The Gates Are Open

alexthegreatoff Report

#75

I Decided To Make Some Original Content, Am I Doing It Right?

I Decided To Make Some Original Content, Am I Doing It Right?

illustralie Report

#76

Nice To See This

Nice To See This

Jesus_Shaves_ Report

#77

We Are All Just Humans Trying To Make It To Tomorrow

We Are All Just Humans Trying To Make It To Tomorrow

allhailjhanell Report

#78

For Those That Might Not Have Known, And Those That Know But Needed To Hear It All The Same

For Those That Might Not Have Known, And Those That Know But Needed To Hear It All The Same

burritobaby70 Report

#79

All Consoles Are Good!

All Consoles Are Good!

Falom Report

#80

One Of My Favorite Tweeters With His Gates Wide Open!

One Of My Favorite Tweeters With His Gates Wide Open!

Browncoat-Tiefling Report

#81

No Hamsters!

No Hamsters!

Holeeschite Report

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#82

Everybody Is Something

Everybody Is Something

ruthdubb Report

#83

We’ve All Been There

We’ve All Been There

Magicman_22 Report

#84

We’re All In This Bumpy Sweaty Party Together

We’re All In This Bumpy Sweaty Party Together

Tiffanymp3 Report

#85

Ian Opining The Gates

Ian Opining The Gates

LULAARO Report

#86

Gym Doors Open, Come Inside

Gym Doors Open, Come Inside

lulz1996 Report

#87

I Swear To God

I Swear To God

Jazzbandrew Report

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#88

It’s Spooky Season

It’s Spooky Season

spicylatino69 Report

#89

What Counts As Traveling?

What Counts As Traveling?

xshareddx Report

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#90

Spotify Wrapped

Spotify Wrapped

ConsumeFecalMatter Report

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#91

Fixed It

Fixed It

DomeAcolyte42 Report

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#92

A Little Advice For The Ladies

A Little Advice For The Ladies

ivvix Report

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