WOT LOL

Smart dog.

*scream laughs*

Until now, I had no idea that I absolutely have to have a stuffed aardvark.

That's smooth af

D'awww.

And.. that is how I met your mother

LOL

OMG

Fierce and wise

Aaaaand I'm not surprised it was a bad scene.

Well? Will there?

Aw sweet 😊

Help I've actually gone green with envy

That's a message from God. This was meant to be...

they get ya every time

I hope that boss gets arrested for being a shitty asswipe of a boss

Gotcha!

Genius 😁

Time to start moisturizing!

be careful

I love gummy bears.

GAHHHHH IT'S THE SAME THING WITH ALL GRANNIES NOW EH

CHEESUS

Sounds about right

...avoided getting hit by a bicycle only to get hit by the garbage truck...

The f**k???

Granny again..

a christmas miracle

And he made you think it was a coincidence! He has dozens of drawings made, sold to people that he followed for years to select those he liked, and then found a way to approach them in a non-suspect way. After a period of time they got used to his "style" after looking at the portrait everyday, so they felt a familiarity when seeing him that makes them think that they were vibing with him. The rest is compatibility! :p

And now, you’ve survived cancer, and we can all laugh about it...Hallelujah!

Ooh! I did that! All because I honestly was walking to the direction where I thought I parked my car, then realized I had to save face by acting like a friend was parked waiting for me then left, so I had to walk back to my car.

I do the "surprised expression, click fingers, spin around and walk back the way I came whilst shaking my head".

Uh how is this a real life plot twist?

you do know the world is really not paying attention to what you're doing? they really aren't for the most part. i used to think like this, like i had an audience. we really do not have an audience. if they're not paying to see you, they're usually NOT SEEING YOU.

That's sad! Why? You made a mistake and rectified! I do that all the time, should I worry???

I once pretended I had kids to the lady behind me in a bath shop so I could buy children's bubble bath. I even invented personalities for them and named them: Georgiana and Sebastian

What is so awkward about this? Who cares? And I like for people to see me confused. It's like a line in the sand telling them enough, don't ask me for anything

Or you could just turn round and not involve a phone? I mean seriously, who gives a f**k about which way you're walking?

Common occurrence really

that’s some good improv

Instead of being so dramatic, just turn around. It's pretty obvious that you forgot something or made a wrong turn.

But black cats are lucky!

OK something is definitely sus with these grannies

My next door neighbor who is a friends with the neighbor in the apartment right blow mine was ringing at my door and impatiently so! I wondered what the emergency was. But I still opened the door with an open mind, and she hurries inside my apartment with some takeout... Realizing mid-step that she has her friends door but with her own floor and that isn't how it works! I never seen someone leave so quickly leaving her apologizing words floating in the air behind her. No need to say I laughed but still tried to make it an "It's-OK-we-all-make-mistakes" laugh to not embarrass her even more! :)

Well! At least you didn't expect it, and your house is clean!

Name!

And all of a suddenyou had the entire restaurant to yourselves ....no waiting to get seated...well played kiddo well played