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The Best And The Funniest Dad Jokes

Trying to determine what makes a good (or bad) dad joke is not so easy, but there are certain ingredients that we can name. First of all, the one-liner has to be administered by a dad (not necessarily your own), it has to be both corny and somewhat amusing, and most of all, it just has to have a hackneyed pun to make it the best joke ever.
Although not everyone is a big fan of that type of comedy gold, there is a certain amount of appreciation any person can have for a well-timed funny pun. Especially if it's followed by thunderous laughter from the person and the classic finger-guns pose.
Oh, and if you’re a dad joke aficionado like we are, you might be surprised to know where these inappropriate jokes stem from. So, the first theory is that your beloved father just feels nostalgic for those times when you were little and laughed at just about anything.
The other approach for these hilarious jokes is a much more anticipated one—your father wants to embarrass you as much as he can while he can. And that's precisely what these funny jokes are meant to do.
Scroll down below to see some of the best funny dad jokes around, and don't forget to comment and vote for your favorites.

This post may include affiliate links.

#1

Can I Have A Book Mark?

Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

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#2

Perfect Pun

DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.

MOM: Oh my! Who!?

DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?

MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????

DAD: No, it was with a knife...

Alessia_Fisher Report

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#3

Holy Water

How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.

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#4

Donald Duck

The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked. Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"

ldrescher Report

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#5

Origin Of French Fries

Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.

somekindahuman Report

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#6

Least Spoken Language

What is the least spoken language in the world? Sign language

A_Sea_Cucumber Report

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#7

Which Came First?

I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know

JohnathanWickers Report

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#8

Sense Of Direction

My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.

porichoygupto Report

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#9

Trippy Shoes

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

motherfkersantana Report

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#10

Nap Time Puns

Nap Time Puns If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?

korpsart Report

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#11

Concepts Of Gravity

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down!

raheel1122 Report

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#12

Nobody Knows

What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.

Lee_Hey_pat Report

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#13

Pie Rates

A slice of apple pie is $2.50 in Jamaica and $3.00 in the Bahamas. These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.

porichoygupto Report

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#14

Conversation Starter

Conversation Starter My daughter screeched, "Daaaaaad, you haven't listened to one word I've said, have you!?" What a strange way to start a conversation with me...

madazzahatter Report

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#15

Single Handedly The Best

My wife tried to unlatch our daughter's car seat with one hand and said, "How do one armed mothers do it?" Without missing a beat I replied, "Single handedly."

thunderup_14 Report

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#16

Serving Justice

Justice is a dish best served cold, if it were served warm it would be justwater.

Spider_Dimwit Report

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#17

Dying To Get There

Dying To Get There When a dad drives past a graveyard: Did you know that's a popular cemetery? Yep, people are just dying to get in there!

AshleyJack Report

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#18

Meaning Well

My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.

StewPaddasso Report

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#19

Sir Arthur's Knights

Sir Arthur's Knights The fattest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

omgthatspunny Report

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#20

Logical Explanation

MOM: "How do I look?" DAD: "With your eyes."

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A Deeper Purpose Behind Dad Jokes
It’s easy to write off the best dad jokes ever as being corny. However, some experts believe such jokes have a deeper purpose. According to The Conversation, dads feel more like fatherly figures when telling such jokes. While the dads get their dose of humor, children learn to deal with embarrassment. These factors help develop a healthy father-child relationship.
Even the most corny dad jokes can have long-lasting effects on adult children. According to the ABC7 report, jokes like these can help a child become a better human being and a more confident adult. As they “build up” immunity to embarrassment, children are more willing to open up and be themselves.
So, instead of getting red from embarrassment, appreciate your dose of the dad joke of the day. Not only are you bringing joy to your parent, but you also develop a confident personality. When you reach adulthood, you’ll have your own collection of dad jokes to tell your friends.

#21

Silent P

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the pee is silent.

Capetoider Report

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#22

Vegetarian Zombie

Vegetarian Zombie What does a zombie vegetarian eat? “GRRRAAAAAIIIINNNNS!”

PolesawPolska Report

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#23

Rules Of Life

3 unwritten rules of life...
1.
2.
3.

madazzahatter Report

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#24

Excited For Spring

Spring is here! I got so excited I wet my plants!

mblondie Report

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#25

Company Mergers

Did you hear the news? FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.

AshleyJack Report

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#26

Witnessing A Robery

Witnessing A Robery If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an iWitness?

Gingafer81 Report

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#27

Untrustworthy Particles

Don't trust atoms. They make up everything!

letrollface1279 Report

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#28

Name-Giving

I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferson… He said, “But dad, your name is Brian.” I said, “I know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.”

madazzahatter Report

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#29

Magician Dad

KID: "Dad, make me a sandwich!" DAD: "Poof, you’re a sandwich!”

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#30

No More Butts

What has two butts and kills people? An assassin

LeCrowing Report

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#31

Invisible Man

Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn't see himself doing it.

DeathEater101 Report

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#32

Server's Nightmare

SERVER: "Sorry about your wait." DAD: "Are you saying I’m fat?”

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#33

Happy Anniversary

Happy Anniversary What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? AYE MATEY

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#34

Pros And Cons

What's the best part about living in Switzerland? I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.

Lliizzaarrddd Report

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#35

Would You Like A Bag?

CASHIER: "Would you like the milk in a bag, sir?" DAD: "No, just leave it in the carton!’”

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#36

Ice Cream Truck

Ice Cream Truck When an ambulance zips past with its siren blaring: "They won’t sell much ice cream driving that fast.”

IABDPresents Report

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#37

Ever Rolling

If Snoop Dogg dies before pot becomes legal in the US, he will be rolling in his grave.

porichoygupto Report

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#38

Magic Spells

What do you call a dog that can do magic? A Labracadabrador.

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#39

Math Problems

Math Problems 5/4 of people admit that they’re bad with fractions.

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#40

Feeling Tired

Why couldn't the bike standup by itself? It was two tired.

TheLast0ne_ Report

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What is the Oldest Dad Joke?
Like with everything, there is a specific starting point for jokes. While we might not know the first dad joke to be told, we might get a hint at the genre it was in. Fart jokes want to or not date back to the Sumerians. According to Reuters, a fart joke dates back to 1900 B.C. While you might have it in your list of jokes to tell your dad, keep it around to get the upper hand in a corny humor standoff.

#41

Deer Pun

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea!

ElderCunningham Report

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#42

Father Figure

GRANDPA: I have a 'dad bod', DAD: To me it's more like a father figure.

maryfountain Report

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#43

Dentist Time

Dentist Time What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.

smithy2004 Report

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#44

Outstanding Cow

When a dad drives past a cow pasture: LOOK! That cow is OUT-STANDING in his field!

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#45

Forrest Gump Password

What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1

BombOmbBuddy Report

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#46

Half Left

When you ask a dad if he's alright: "No, I’m half left.”

Admblackhawk Report

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#47

Calendar Factory

I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.

TheSupraDixk Report

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#48

Burning Smell

KID: "Hey, I was thinking…" DAD: "I thought I smelled something burning.”

AshleyJack Report

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#49

Birthday Card

SON: *hands my Dad his 50th birthday card*, DAD: You know, one would have been enough.

porichoygupto Report

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#50

Kidding

Kidding When a woman is giving birth, she is literally kidding.

ownworldman Report

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#51

Three Guys

Three Guys Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

usernamemispeled Report

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#52

Termite Pun

A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

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#53

Octopus Tickles

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten-tickles.

superdrew91 Report

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#54

Shellfish

Why did the crab never share? Because he's shellfish.

Mr_McMuffins Report

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#55

Bison And Buffalo

Bison And Buffalo What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

_solidwarp_ Report

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#56

April May

Can February March? No, but April May!

guts_full_of_meat Report

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#57

Elon Controversy

To call the whole Elon Musk controversy “Elon-Gate” seems like a bit of a stretch.

JuIius_Seizure95 Report

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#58

Ham Sandwich

A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry we don’t serve food here."

bobbyperuse Report

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#59

Lean Beef

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef. If the cow has no legs, then it’s ground beef.

allmyritz Report

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#60

Salted Peanut

Salted Peanut Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a salted.

ConcaveMishap Report

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#61

Best Dam Show

Best Dam Show Want to hear a joke about a piece of paper? Never mind... it's tearable.

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#62

Forever 21

Where did the college-aged vampire like to shop? Forever 21.

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#63

Beethoven Fruit

What is Beethoven’s favorite fruit? A ba-na-na-na.

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#64

Haircut Pun

When you ask a dad if they got a haircut: "No, I got them all cut!"

KEERTHIVLOGS Report

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#65

747 Sounds

What noise does a 747 make when it bounces? Boeing, Boeing, Boeing.

wehavechocolate Report

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#66

Total Ripoff

Why wasn't the woman happy with the velcro she bought? It was a total ripoff.

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#67

Horse Tripped

What did the horse say after it tripped? "Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!”

AshleyJack Report

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#68

Bisacktual

GROCERY STORE CHECKER: "Paper or plastic?" DAD: "Either, I’m bisacktual.”

AshleyJack Report

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#69

A Trumpet

You know what the loudest pet you can get is? A trumpet.

JonquilXanthippe Report

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#70

Deter Gents

I hear it's easy to get ladies not to eat Tide pods. It's more difficult to deter gents, though.

Boomkiller Report

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#71

Passable Products

What do you call a factory that sells passable products? A satisfactory.

TotalBuilder45 Report

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#72

First Offender

A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, "First offender?" She says, "No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!”

FunnyGenious Report

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#73

Circus Fire

Did you hear about the circus fire? It was in tents!

ROTFLandmines Report

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#74

Angry Pepper

What does an angry pepper do? It gets jalapeño your face.

Peekatchu1997 Report

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#75

Keeping A Log

As a lumberjack, I know that I’ve cut exactly 2,417 trees. I know because every time I cut one, I keep a log.

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#76

Frostbite

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite.

dadjokes Report

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#77

American And European

You're American when you go into the bathroom, and you're American when you come out, but do you know what you are while you're in there? European.

twofirstkinds Report

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#78

Soup Or Salad

WAITRESS: "Soup or salad?" DAD: "I don’t want a SUPER salad, I want a regular salad.”

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#79

25 Letters

I’m only familiar with 25 letters in the English language. I don’t know why.

IsaiaHarris03 Report

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#80

It's Tearable

Want to hear a joke about a piece of paper? Never mind... it's tearable.

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#81

Cheese Toastie

I was interrogated over the theft of a cheese toastie. Man, they really grilled me.

TheHaleyBaby Report

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#82

Chicken Sedan

Why do chicken coops only have two doors? Because if they had four, they would be chicken sedans!

Lee_Hey_pat Report

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#83

Postmen Letters

If you rearrange the letters of “Postmen”. They get really pissed off.

porichoygupto Report

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#84

An Elephant And A Rhino

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino.

K4RAB_THA_ARAB Report

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#85

Muffler Dream

Muffler Dream I had a dream that I was a muffler last night. I woke up exhausted!

MayorMcGrimace Report

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#86

A Gigabyte Pun

You heard of that new band 1023MB? They're good but they haven't got a gig yet.

Gamer-Citrus Report

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#87

Dog Walks Into A Bar

A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I’m looking for the man who shot my paw."

USAneedsAJohnson Report

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#88

Lifesaver Inventor

Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.

Rohi0109 Report

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#89

Fortnite Pun

I told my 14 year old son I thought 'Fortnite' was a stupid name for a computer game. I think it is just too weak.

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#90

Carry Your Tune

DAD, TO A SINGER: "Don’t forget a bucket." SINGER: "Why?" DAD: "To carry your tune."

_solidwarp_ Report

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#91

Lonely Cheese

What do you call a lonely cheese? Provolone.

Versacepoop Report

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#92

Square Meal

Did you see they made round bails of hay illegal in Wisconsin? It’s because the cows weren’t getting a square meal.

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#93

Toad And Frog

How do you tell the difference between a frog and a horny toad? A frog says, "Ribbit, ribbit" and a horny toad says, "Rub it, rub it.”

turtleforeskin88 Report

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#94

Kleenex Dance

How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!

BasedOnAir Report

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#95

Bad Blood

Why didn't the vampire attack Taylor Swift? She had bad blood.

omgthatspunny Report

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#96

Cell Phones

What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones.

Iplaychesssometimes Report

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#97

Little Horse

Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water? Because he was a little horse!

madazzahatter Report

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#98

Two-Knee Fish

Two-Knee Fish What do you call a fish with two knees? A “two-knee” fish.

blacklutefisk Report

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#99

Blood Type

NURSE: "Blood type?" DAD: "Red."

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Giedrė Vaičiulaitytė

As a writer and image editor for Bored Panda, Giedrė crafts posts on many different topics to push them to their potential. She's also glad that her Bachelor’s degree in English Philology didn’t go to waste (although collecting dust in the attic could also be considered an achievement of aesthetic value!) Giedrė is an avid fan of cats, photography, and mysteries, and a keen observer of the Internet culture which is what she is most excited to write about. Since she's embarked on her journalistic endeavor, Giedrė has over 600 articles under her belt and hopes for twice as much (fingers crossed - half of them are about cats).

As a writer and image editor for Bored Panda, Giedrė crafts posts on many different topics to push them to their potential. She's also glad that her Bachelor’s degree in English Philology didn’t go to waste (although collecting dust in the attic could also be considered an achievement of aesthetic value!) Giedrė is an avid fan of cats, photography, and mysteries, and a keen observer of the Internet culture which is what she is most excited to write about. Since she's embarked on her journalistic endeavor, Giedrė has over 600 articles under her belt and hopes for twice as much (fingers crossed - half of them are about cats).

Ieva Midveryte

Hello Pandas! My name is Ieva, though it's often mistaken for the word 'Leva,' and in Lithuanian, it means 'loser' (insert the pain emoji). While I don't take offense if you accidentally call me a loser, I thought I'd share something interesting with you, which I also do professionally at work.Anywayyy, my favorite part here is introducing you to creative people who deserve just as much recognition as famous celebrities. Besides that, I also enjoy memes and funny, lighthearted posts, and occasionally, I find myself drawn to a bit of internet drama.

Hello Pandas! My name is Ieva, though it's often mistaken for the word 'Leva,' and in Lithuanian, it means 'loser' (insert the pain emoji). While I don't take offense if you accidentally call me a loser, I thought I'd share something interesting with you, which I also do professionally at work.Anywayyy, my favorite part here is introducing you to creative people who deserve just as much recognition as famous celebrities. Besides that, I also enjoy memes and funny, lighthearted posts, and occasionally, I find myself drawn to a bit of internet drama.

What do you think ?

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