40 Examples Of Toxic Positivity, As Called Out By Women In This Online Group

Anytime someone says this what they're really saying is "You're being too negative so I'm going to make you think your problem is a positive thing and then I won't have to hear about it anymore."

EXACTLY. So much of humanity seems QUICK to "make light work" of someone else's life experiences while crying loudly (or faux-stoicly) about their own.

its on 169 want to upvote but...

I know this is a random side tangent, but this is exactly what bugged the s**t out of me about Sansa telling The Hound that all the s**t she went through made her who she was, completely invalidating all of her character growth, intelligence, strength, etc.

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You can't choose your biological family, but you CAN choose whether or not they a part in your life (at least once you are old enough to have those choices, minors are kind of stuck, especially if they have parents who don't give a crud).

I told my mom--why do I have to unconditionally love someone who I wouldn't even go for coffee with if we weren't related? (she did not like it)

Cut toxic people out of your life, blood ties or not. The blood tied toxic peeps are the ones that do the most damage.

My mom telling me this about my abusive younger brother, even as she cuts all ties and refuses to ever talk again to her abusive younger brother 🤨

Often comes with "I did it because I love you, care about you". Doesn't mean it didn't hurt, was wrong and traumatized me.

Says someone who has never struggled with depression or anxiety.

I had a pharmacist say this to me when picking up my meds. I was so stunned I didn't say anything. Was telling my mom about it and she goes to the same pharmacy. She apparently had a word with her supervisor. I was like 42 at the time. Mama bear until the end. She actually told someone last week that her "baby just turned 46."

Mental illness is not a personal failure or a character defect. It is real, just like any other disorder. You can't just pretend it away, pull yourself up by your bootstraps, or rely on 'faith healing' to make it better. It takes work - damned hard work - and sometimes meds. No shame in any of it!

Or my very favorite: if you're depressed you are either too focused on yourself or that you need to have more faith.

An then there's those who tell you to pray more.... are you praying away your diabetes? I think not.

It can cause you as much grief, but it is a very different kind of grief.

What a load of crap. Not even close.

I understand that she's probably right. But she can't really judge unless she's been through both. And, even then, it probably depends on a lot of factors that vary from person to person. For instance, the death of a person who you were forced to stay with is probably easier than getting divorced from a person you still love.

They were together since she was 18?

I'm so sorry that your life partner died. This is your loss, and it's as personal and unique as you, him, the relationship you shared.

I always hated “you be strong for [other grieving person]” like your grief doesn’t matter. When my stepdad died, I basically got told to be glad it wasn’t my husband, stop my crying, and to be strong for my mom. F-off. He was my dad for 28 years.

I'm not religious so to me, when someone dies they are gone. Not to heaven, not to hell. No afterlife or haunting etc. Just gone.

Best comment I got when someone close to me passed away was “wow, that sucks. That sucks beyond belief. That’s awful,” and then they just sat with me. I really appreciated the acknowledgment.

I've been to a few catholic funerals, and the thing I absolutely hate the most is when the priest says that we should not be sad that the person died. It's so infuriating!

I hate it too because I'm not religious and d far as I'm concerned they're not in a better place, they're just gone. But I get that this is something people say because they don't know what to say, and also I get that people who are religious really do believe that and I try to respect that. Just because I'm not religious it doesn't give me the right to tell religious people they're wrong.