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Have you seen Midnight in Paris? The movie is not about the city per se, rather it's about our fascination with it. Woody Allen asks us why the dream of Paris seems more powerful than walking on its streets.

However, it's not just historical European landmarks that infatuate our minds. That cause us to look at the world through an unrealistic lens. No, no, there are many more culprits — we're too easily swayed.

Last week, Redditor u/Buttercuppy44 asked other users, "What's something we need to stop normalizing?" And it turned out to be a discussion we really needed. People straight away came through with plenty of specific and accurate examples.

#1

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Having to respect a damaging point of view because it's part of someone's religion.

No, I don't have to respect your belief that women are inferior or that LGTBQ+ people shouldn't have rights because your religion tells you to believe that. It's a bad point of view.

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Trixypix
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This should be higher up in the list AND it can be extended to every belief in general about 'we' are better then 'them' because of religion/ money/ education/ the place where you live/ the colour of your socks/ etc.etc.

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#2

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Canceling people for things they did 10+ years ago. If someone has shown growth in that time then let them grow.

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Otter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Huzzah, huzzah! The only thing more ridiculous than cancelling someone for a trivial offense committed years ago, is someone digging through ten years of someone else's social media in search of something to use against them.

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#3

Kids beauty pageants.

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Otter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not widely considered normal. Considered creepy, disturbing, and exploitative among sane people.

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#4

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Coming to work sick. People tend to get praised for that, but they are in fact just endangering others to get sick as well — and in the end, it costs the company more than if they would've just stayed home.

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#5

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Being rude to retail and food workers. We work hard all day, deal with some of the worst customers bar none, and really don't get paid enough to support families but we do it anyway. For way less than it's worth

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#6

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Ads on stuff you've paid for.

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#7

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Filters that change the shape of your face to fit a beauty standard. Kids are growing up with an even more distorted view of what they should look like than previous generations

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#8

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Taking pictures of strangers without their knowledge and posting it on the internet. It is toxic as hell and it wasn't that long ago it was seen as creepy.

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Foxxy (The Original)
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It should be illegal. The last thing I want is for someone to take a photo of me and end up becoming a meme or something.

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#9

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop That anything is possible if you try hard enough. Don't get me wrong, a lot is possible, but not everything. There are factors beyond ourselves that determine our success. The best we can do is to give our best, and be happy that we've done so.

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TheBlackPanda (JustABlackBear)
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hardwork doesn't always lead to success. A lot of people that became successful through "hard work" don't usually include one thing in their success stories: the role of luck. Some of them were lucky to be born in the right place, to the right people, at the right time, happened to go to the right school, happened to make the right friends, etc. For every success story, there are thousands and millions that did the same amount of hardwork and got nowhere. The difference is, those hardworking but unsuccessful people were simply unlucky. No one knows a sure formula for success in life. It's easy to think you do when you've made it.

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#10

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop People being bastards on the internet, because of anonymity.

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#11

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Using religion as a weapon.

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Kesam
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To me it's more using religion as an excuse (to discriminate, to question science, to explain away EVERYTHING...)

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#12

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop The greed of the top 1% that fuels the pollution and decay of our planet.

Looking at you Jeff, Bill, and Mark

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NsG
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm going to get downvotes here, but you need to swap out Bill for Richard. Yes, Mr Gates has done some deplorable things while gaining his millions. But he has done philanthropic things that the others haven't even considered. Demonstrably tried to improve things for the rest of humanity. The others? No bathroom breaks and trains that barely run at all never mind on time. Oh, and I'm damn sure it wasn't his age that stopped him taking part in the Prick Space Race, so that's a point in his favour too. Dislike or full on loathe him all you want, but he is no longer in the same league of greed and evil as the others. (Mr Zuckerberg is in a league of his own, although he does look like he wants to be Bezos when he grows up, so...)

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#13

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop The idea that being an as*hole is a sign of intelligence. Jerks are rarely intelligent. Sheldon Cooper, Rick Sanchez, Hannibal Lecter, and Dr. House do not exist.

In my experience, being rude and condescending turns out to be a sign of stupidity, not intelligence.

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Anne
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sheldon was actually very true to life for a lot of smart autistic people..but he would be what we would be without adapting skills. And most of us have adapted to our environment.. But he feels rather authentic. He isn't rude or condescending - he just doesn't understand most humans. That's why he follows the rules.. hot beverages for upset humans etc.

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#14

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Throwing cigarette butts on the floor.

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Adam C
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Throwing cirarette butts WHILE protesting for for climate-change.

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#15

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Having an opinion on everything.

It’s okay to look at something on the internet and think to yourself “I don’t have to care about this.”

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#16

Kids doing animal abuse. Stop it with, "they are just kids they don't know any better"

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Luka Verheijen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If it's too extreme, it's often a sign of a sadistic personality, so more reason to work on that early

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#17

The idea that a woman can slap a man if she's angry at him, but a man should never hit a woman regardless of the circumstances.

The former is assault - hitting people who aren't already involved in a physical altercation is never OK, regardless of the circumstances. The latter ties into that; if you are being attacked, the level of force you use in defence should be dependent on the danger you are in, which has almost nothing to do with the sex of your attacker.

Both of these rely on the tired and sexist trope that women are meek little does who have not the physical strength nor moral turpitude to commit violence against the big, strong, tough men. They normalize assault and abuse and accordingly belong in the dustbin of history.

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Luka Verheijen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Finally someone who adresses this! This double standard bothers me fir a long time. Also, some women who try to be "feminists" still keep this in check. If you want equal rights for men and women, that includes the downsides too

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#18

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Bullying. It's absurd how society will frame it as a "stage of your life" rather than supporting individuals more so they know how to deal with it. Especially academically, still overlooked majorly.

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Kira Okah
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And massively overlooked or flat out ignored on social media. Ad in the workforce. It not just something kids do on the playground.

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#19

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Alcoholic moms. No, you don’t NEED to bring wine to your daughters soccer game. It’s not quirky. It’s awful. Wine mom stuff on social media only strengthens it and makes it more popular.

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Grumble O'Pug
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Instamom is the stuff if nightmares. Like the recent one where she jams on the brakes to teach her kid to buckle up. Full blown narcissism in action

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#20

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Using mental illness as an excuse. I suffer from several, and it's very hard on me.. But, i get professional help and deal with it head on. Reading constant posts everyday about people having this disorder and that disorder and that's why it's ok to act a certain way is demotivating. Awareness is important, but dozens of posts everyday about having borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder and why it's acceptable for you to be an a-hole is not awareness... If you suffer from these so badly, please get help

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#21

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Married couples disliking one another. Normalizing abusive and toxic elements in marriage is lame, bro.

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Burs
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Like the jokes about men being “chained” when they decide to marry. Then don’t f*****g marry. If I was the girlfriend In would be furious

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#22

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Working while on vacation. You go on vacation to relax and enjoy yourself, not to try to fill out spreadsheets and deal with work stuff in your hotel room.

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KJ
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm guessing this is more a US issue from what I have read, most of us just don't work when on leave.

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#23

Using the phrase "it's my right" as a get out of jail free card to engage in whatever reckless behaviour that takes your fancy.

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#24

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop The entire "game" involved in modern dating or even most social interactions. The playing hard to get, the "arriving fashionably late" like people can we please keep it simple?

Ya go on laugh at me.

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Scagsy
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've been married for just over a decade and would be absolutely terrified of being back in the dating game. I wouldn't know where to start.

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#25

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Unhealthy weight. I’m not talking about being fit and thin and making people feel bad about their bodies. Im not talking about having a few extra pounds and making people feel bad for that. I have a few extra pounds, I’m not super fit, but I’m relatively healthy. Everyone’s body is different. Healthy means a lot of different things.

I’m talking about normalizing morbidly obese people as beautiful and something to be celebrated. It’s dangerous especially if children see them as someone to look up to. Then they’ll think it’s ok for your body to carry around so much weight that your heart and lungs are working overtime to keep you alive. It will lead to devastating later years in life as you age and your body slows down. You’ll be at risk for cardiovascular issues, you’ll probably die before your time, and the last few years of your life will be bed ridden while you waste away.

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Otter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

While I agree that there is such a thing as unhealthy weight, you still won't see me attacking the "body positivity movement". Because for people to change for the better, the first step has to be letting go of the self-hatred and shame that plagues the seriously overweight and drives them into a self-destructive spiral of self-harming and self-comforting behavior. If the body positivity movement helps anyone let go of the guilt and self-hatred that's poisoned their lives then more good than harm has been done, and it's not like body negativity ever did anyone any good. You can't shame people into being thinner or healthier, that's not how humans work.

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#26

having unsocial and aggressive dogs, and not leashing or otherwise controlling them

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#27

Degrees for office jobs that take almost no time to learn and usually have nothing to do with the degree anyways . So many people out there who can’t afford college but, are just as capable as anyone else.

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J. F.
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ridiculous demands from the same companies that cry over the lack of qualified employees

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#28

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Diamond and gemstones as gifts. They're shiny rocks with artificially inflated value. They're only expensive because people are willing to pay so much for them. If everyone stopped buying them, the price would fall faster than the Hindenburg. Or faster than the employment rate this year.

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#29

Cheating. Sooo many "love stories" on netflix, or just any sort of romance movie released these days have cheating involved in them so much. It's always branded as this romantic thing to do. Oooo like at this dark and brooding handsome guy with no personality. Time to f him and forget about my 2 year relationship, or some s*** like that. It's not romantic, it's just wrong, and it should not be normalised.

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Luka Verheijen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's all a little more complicated, some people seem to think cheating is about as bad as it can get. But that being said, romance movies are actually the most messed up when you think about it

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#30

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Unhealthily obese pets. You took a warrior and domesticated it! They aren't happy if they're fat! They just eat on instinct! Stop inadvertently hurting the beings that love us unconditionally!

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#31

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Bragging about getting less than 6 hours of sleep.

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#32

The grind. Not taking vacation. Working on vacation. Working through your lunch break. Working early and late all the time. Answering emails after hours.

We are completely dispensable to the companies we work for. Don’t lose your life grinding for a company who only thinks of you as a number.

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Vorknkx
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I work at a university, and vacations are sacrosanct here. We have an unwritten rule that you never call someone who is on vacation, no matter how dire the need may be.

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#33

Over-consumption. This goes out to social media influencers who flaunt their hauls and influence people to buy things that they don't need. It will just add on to the landfills. Please, no one's benefitting from hoarding.

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Trixypix
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's too much credit for the influencers. Overconsumption entails much more than that. Sadly enough.

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#34

Hatred of someone who lives differently than they do.

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J. F.
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As long as it doesn't hurt anybody else it's none of my business

Full Name
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, I'm so done with the whole "you're wrong if you don't share the same opinions as me" thing. Or even going so far as to "expose" or cancel someone for having a different or maybe even unpopular opinion. Keep your nose and your camera out of peoples faces and mind your own f-ing business.

earringnut
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Gates no, he's not hurting anyone. Benzos, keep doing what you've been doing but with a little more gusto.

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Oskar vanZandt
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Do no harm to others" should be the principle all human beings live by... sadly, we don't. (I'm NOT suggesting I'm perfect- I am trying to live more consciously and don't set out to hurt anyone). I'm tolerant of everyone so long as others in this thread have said, their "difference" in thought, words and actions does not negatively affect the well-being of others.

Mark Johansen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or disdain. I read an article on some web site where the writer said that she lived in such a great neighborhood, even the construction workers were "sipping lattes" on their break time. So ... people who drink lattes are better than people who drink regular coffee or ... gasp ... colas? You judge people based on their beverage choice? Really?

HilCo
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Does that include overweight people ? Because everyone feels they have the right to comment on how unhealthy it is , it's just bullying by being 'caring' ...

DC
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

... or hatred towards people being a little bit different, just them themselves, not doing any harm, not wanting to, but being punished for being differently. School taught me that this is the default behaviour of humans, it seems - and they couldn't even point at anything and tell me what's so "different" about me.

Riley Quinn
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In this case, hatred stems from misunderstanding, which could be rectified with some education (self or formal). But that would require an effort, and hate is just so darn easy for some people.

moeless
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't care who you screw, pray to or even your favorite brew. But don't expect me to...agree.

catmom3
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

With reference to some 'religious' people's abhorrence of LGBTQ+ women having control over their own bodies......what the hell business is it of the haters what other people do?

bill marsano
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I believe in 'live and let live but quietly.' I keep my religion, sexual practices etc to myself and prefer that you do the same.

survivalrhino
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ain't got time for that kind of nonsense, as long as they aint bothering me, my family or my dogs, whateva

Mari Bryant
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Like fat people or someone who gets less than 6 hours of sleep?

Damon Tripodi
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why can't you hate someone? Tolerate yes. But I still hate some people. And how about the earlier post with people hating on the 1%... They just live differently

Jim Wamsley
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How often is it jealousy of the other person being able to live as they do?

Ileana Sky Aviles
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't like this and people pointing it out constantly to humiliate you saying you've had an upper hand advantage.

Healing Moon Breezes
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hatred is a strong word. So you are saying if someone doesn't like your lifestyle you automatically judge them hateful.

Kat
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Basically all I read on news every day... Hate speech...

Loty
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This one should be way higher on the list. There is no us and them. It's just us.

Devil's Advocate
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This. Although some people don't help themselves by constantly shoving their lifestyle in everyone's faces when NOBODY CARES

Viviane
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That sucks. I'm lucky to have easy-going folks around me. My colleagues think I'm a tad odd for not eating poutine, but they're kind enough not to force-feed it to me. I don't force-feed them radish and goat cheese sandwiches. All good.

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Tres D
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Like tge angry bitter hate filled liberals that will cancel anybody that disagrees with them.

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#35

Toxic positivity. There’s a huge difference between being optimistic and having raised colored glasses on. We’re all people, and we all experience negative and positive emotions. The only way you can properly get over your emotions is by allowing yourself to feel them. Glossing over your emotions with an aura of “Everything’s fine” isn’t going to solve anything, and it’s just gonna make you feel bad.

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Otter
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a supervisor who was a true believer in toxic positivity. Her attitude was "If we all believe in this stupid idea, it WILL work!", when the sensibly positive attitude is to say "We CAN come up with a solution that will work!".

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#36

Failures in political leadership. I feel more and more we are becoming less critical of failed character in our leaders.

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NsG
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We criticise. It's just water off a duck's back. Its not criticism that's lacking, it's accountability and consequence.

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#37

Student loans.

Education is getting more expensive by the day and the added burden on a student in paying back a student loan helps nobody.

Furthermore people encourage student loans as though the students are obligated to take them if they pursue higher studies. Pure nonsense.

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#38

Hating police. I've worked places that police don't go. You all don't know how good you have it.

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Kesam
Community Member
3 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't hate police in general, but I've had my arm and nearly my skull broken during the 2001 Genoa protests (unprovoked attack on peaceful protesters) and I was in the Diaz school raid (but luckily wasn't hurt as I was hiding in a closet). Sooo... there's good apples and bad apples... but the bad apples do a lot of damage as they are put in a position of power.

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#39

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Students overwhelmed by homework when it isn’t necessary. I’m excluding situations like when the workloads from classes are reasonable and happen to pile on one day or students who aren’t organized, etc. This whole thing is a grey area, but sleep, burnout, mental health exists.

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WilvanderHeijden
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A little coordination between teachers could solve this problem. I can remember the times where we had to do an assignment for English and an hour later our French teacher came up with a similar time consuming assignment. When we explained that that meant we had to choose which one we could do, he postponed the assignment for 2 weeks. But other teachers just said "Deal with it." It's education, teacher, we're not operating a multibillion dollar business with deadlines and targets here.

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#40

People Are Sharing 40 Things We Are Still Normalizing But Need To Stop Not caring about education. So many people obviously didn't pay attention in elementary school and don't care about it.

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Luka Verheijen
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Over here, the government doesn't see education as a "top priority" while I think it's one of THE most important things

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#41

How alcohol is so casual in today's world.

Lots of people misuse alcohol and don't even know it. Anytime you're seriously getting inebriated, you're hurting your body so much.

I see way too many people coming into the liquor store I work at and buying WAAAY too much. And that's normal.

Kids should be raised on the realities of alcohol consumption.

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Mazer
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Alcohol is literally poison to your body, but it’s a social norm and has the added benefit of reducing stress and inhibitions. It’s use and abuse is not going away anytime soon

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#42

I think people, specifically parents, should stop normalizing that it's a given that their child will grow up to have a family. Instead, parents should emphasize that it's difficult to find the right partner, and that it's possible that it might not even happen at all, and that it would be okay as well.

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Burs
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It’s not about not finding the right partner. It’s about accepting that people can be happy in a committed relation, single, open relation, with or without children, sharing or not the house…

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#43

Obsessing over celebrities/people you do not know irl. So basically stan culture. People will say they 'stan' someone as a point of pride. If it's gotten to that stage then you really really need to take a step back. No hate to those who keep it amongst themselves but yeah not healthy at all imo

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NsG
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm not getting useful Google results. Can someone explain 'stan' please?

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#44

The American dream, that your politicians give a damn about you and that there’s any hope for this planet, there’s not, we are just free falling before we hit the pavement right now.

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Burs
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In general the idea that politicians in any country give a damn about us. We Europeans often sin of thinking that we have it much better just because other countries are worse, but it doesn’t mean that our governments care at all.

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#45

Overworking yourself.

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WilvanderHeijden
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In some countries it's a choice that people make. In other countries it's a necessity to keep a roof above your head and feed your family.

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#46

Throwing tantrums in public. Time to openly admit that the person flipping out is usually in the wrong.

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Mazer
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3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not so. Some people have a hard time dealing with emotions, it’s too easy to sit back and judge. Each fight is different and sometimes the loudest most animated person is the one being victimized the most and they have just reached a breaking point. You never know until the people fighting are split up and interviewed

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