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Successful couples understand and accept the fact that there will always be things they don't agree with or don't like about each other. And that's fine; nobody's perfect.

But many people don't share their every thought and feeling with their significant other, either.

In fact, according to an international study of 80,000 people carried out by Dr. Pepper Schwartz, a professor of sociology at the University of Washington, secrets and lies are commonplace in relationships. 43 percent of men and 33 percent of women say they keep major secrets from their partners, as well as 27 percent of those who say they're in an "extremely happy relationship."

Interested in how these two aspects collide, Reddit user Familiar_Stranger936 made a post on the platform, asking everyone to share what they dislike about their significant other and don't tell them about it. As of today, the post has 9.8K comments, many of which illustrate the quirks and pet peeves that folks choose to keep to themselves.

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    #2

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them I once pushed in my husband’s hemorrhoid while we were out of town so we could enjoy our vacation. There’s nothing I hate about him that I wouldn’t tell him after that.

    ETA: thanks for the awards! To answer a few questions: 1. He tried to do it himself and failed. 2. He had gone to the pharmacy and gotten Preparation H cream and gloves, so I didn’t go in bare-handed (I’m not an animal, guys). 3. An internal hemorrhoid can be pushed back in; an external one cannot. 4. I wrote that answer and went to sleep pretty soon after, and he hasn’t killed me as of this morning, but that may change once he’s seen the upvotes lol.

    skbiglia , Ivan Samkov Report

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    Nice Beast Ludo
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I clearly don't understand how hemorrhoids work and pray I never find out

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    #3

    That he’s not immortal. Selfish bastard.

    Altruistic-Bobcat955 Report

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    #4

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them He’s really really bad at taking criticism. Really bad. And I can’t tell him this because feedback loop etc.

    StGir1 , cottonbro studio Report

    #5

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them That they expect an apology for every hurt feeling, but almost never take accountability or apologize for their own actions when they hurt other people.

    imav8n , Alex Green Report

    #6

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them His sneezing.
    He is allergic and can't help it. But he scream-sneezes every day, usually several times in a row, and I HATE loud sudden noises.

    OccasionalAnhedonia , Edward Jenner Report

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    Water dog
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When my explosive sneeze is coming on I can't talk. I wave my hand towards my wife and should be covers her ears. We've decided we are a funny couple.

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    #7

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them She watches YouTube/Tik Tok videos on her phone and refuses to use headphones/earbuds. I hate it.

    usspaceforce , cottonbro studio Report

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    Biytemii
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg my husband does this is makes me crazy! I have to turn up the TV or game I'm playing just to combat it. When it's endless changing sounds like tiktok videos and stuff it should absolutely be in headphones when u are around other people.

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    #8

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them My wife took singing lessons as a kid. She is certain that she has a great singing voice. She does not. It’s so hard to be in the same house when she’s singing but I love her dearly and would never ask her to stop.

    stln3rd , Kindel Media Report

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    #9

    You don’t have to talk to fill silence, sometimes you can just sit in peace, you will not die I promise.

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    #10

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them I don’t necessarily hate this about him, but he doesn’t like to just kiss/make out. He will do it before sexy times, but not for very long. I love showing affection and intimacy by just making out sometimes and not having it lead to anything.

    He had some trauma with it, so I can’t blame him at all. I just really wanna make out with him more!

    TigerRose1226 , cottonbro studio Report

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    Seb Benson
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    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That sounds like something which can be bridged over time. Or at least I hope so for OP & their partner.

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    #11

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them She’s one of those people that walks too slow in the grocery store and stands there looking at s**t forever trying to decide what to get not aware that 2 other people right behind her trying to grab what she’s in front of and go

    BusinessFeeling7121 , Greta Hoffman Report

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    BrownTabby
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If that’s the worst thing she does, you’ve got yourself a catch!

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    #12

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them The way she pronounces the word "hamburger" makes me die inside.

    "ham BIRD gr"

    DrFridayTK , Szabó Viktor Report

    #13

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them They have the diet of a 5 year old.

    IITommoII , Tim Samuel Report

    #14

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them they’re not very intellectual. he’s a sweet and caring guy and incredible otherwise but sometimes I get frustrated with our conversations and the lack of mental stimulation

    implicitxdemand , Ron Lach Report

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    Diolla
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was married to a man who was illiterate and 100% uneducated except for Koran school. My motto was "When I need intellectual stimulation I'll talk to my BFF". Because he was a good man and we loved each other. Nobody is the full package.

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    #15

    I dont know, we are abnormally open about stuff like this to the point where it doesnt even matter anymore.

    We are both annoying and rude to each other and it comes out when we flirt. An outsider who doesnt know us or how we are would think that we are incredibly toxic until we start laughing about it. Ill pretend to complain about her snoring and she will say something like "good, i like it when you suffer because i dont like you". We will just randomly tell one another "you suck" or "you smell like the inside of my a*****e" and then laugh about it. Because im older than her she jokes about buying me one of those Life Alert bracelets because she isnt sure that i will make it through the night. I talk s**t about her cats.

    Love is really weird lol.

    lukas_the Report

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    Jeevesssssss
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love this! My best friends are really rude to me and vice versa. When you get to that point where it's just funny it means you're totally, completely secure in your love for each other so no part of you even thinks to take it seriously. Good job!

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    #16

    She's usually right. Damnit.

    Don't tell her I said that.

    anon Report

    #17

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them I hate how she’s a bad listener. Never wants to know about my day, never takes my advice, never wants to know what’s wrong with me.

    CaliforniaCow , Andrew Neel Report

    #18

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them That when a responsibility becomes too hard, he just doesn't do it and allows things to fester and become worse. Our storage that was lost, a tooth abscess that caused him intense pain I'm forcing him to deal with, and him not paying the registration on our car and it almost getting repossessed. I have no clue why he does this and I feel like I have to be his mother sometimes just to get him to be a responsible adult.

    xcoalminerscanaryx Report

    #19

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them The sound he makes when he eats bagels. Not everything, just bagels, and he eats bagels every morning for breakfast. It’s disgusting.

    anon , RDNE Stock project Report

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    Kathleen McGann
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I used to hate the sound of my ex-husband breathing. Not making a lot of noise breathing. Just breathing. Clearly indicating that I needed to leave before I stopped him.

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    #20

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them His snoring. It's not something he can necessarily control but he snores SO loud that it disrupts my sleep.

    BeatnikWoman , Kampus Production Report

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    Kelly H. Wilder
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Possibly sleep apnea...a CPAP might help if so. It's worth seeing a doctor about because apnea can be fatal.

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    #21

    He tells me s**t I already know.

    For awhile I started saying "I already know that" or " I was right there remember" but after awhile of doing that he started acting so odd, almost unhappy, so I stopped.

    It's part of who he is, and that's okay. Annoying as f**k but but it is a very small % of the big picture. He started doing it last night and I imagined him being an actor and he's going over his lines.

    Helped me deal.

    cheridontllosethatno Report

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    Steve Nelson
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My grandpa used to say, "if you have heard this story before don't say anything. I want to hear myself tell it again."

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    #22

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them He’s a bad kisser. I tried hard to communicate and help in the beginning of the relationship, but nothing worked or stuck. It’s been a lot of years. I gave up.

    lesliebNOPE , Dealakshmii Report

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    #23

    Heavy one incoming:

    I have never forgiven my partner for what he did during my nan's final days.

    We had been together for four years at that point and she died a slow, painful, confusing death thanks to stroke. The week of her death, while i'm still waist deep in grief (we were close) he chooses that moment to tell me he wasn't sure the relationship was working and he wanted to take some time out.

    We slept in seperate beds after that and I cried myself to sleep, alone, every night for days.

    The day of her funeral, he sat at the opposite end of the pew to me, listening to me sob.

    A few days later he comes to me and tells me he's still confused about where we're heading but he wants to keep trying.

    9 years later, we're married, we have a daughter and a house and two dogs, I've nursed him through his own nan's passing, I've nursed him through his father's passing. I've always been there when he had to cry and I held him every time...

    And I have never forgotten. Or forgiven. I hate him for it.

    And I'll never tell him that.

    McStaken Report

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    Fiona Corrigan
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You need to tell him. This is eating you up and you need to give him the opportunity to apologise. Tell him how it made you feel then and how you feel now and what you want from him. You then need to be aware he wasn't expecting this conversation so give him time to think about it and come back for another talk when you're both ready.

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    #24

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them How indecisive she can be. We've talked and she's doing better. But it is extremely exhausting to plan nearly every single date/event/thing we do.

    nagol93 , Andrea Piacquadio Report

    #25

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them That she sounds like a horse when she eats a bowl of cereal.

    anon , Lisa Fotios Report

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    SuperChicken
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is Op for real? It's just that, this is too funny and I've never heard anyone eat a cereal sounding like a horse. I wonder if the partner kicks her leg and neighs, at the same time. (Ok, showing myself out now...)

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    #26

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them He takes about 5 years to tell a story. Takes little detours and goes into too much info about random stuff I don’t really need to know in order to understand the story! I mean don’t get me wrong it’s funny at the best of times but when you’re in a hurry and your waiting for the story to end 🤦🏼‍♀️

    **EDIT:** he's 100% not got ADHD, my little brother has that. If anything he is the complete opposite. He's just extremely calm and likes to take his time, acts like he has all the time in the world to tell a story!

    cookiedough1414 , Matheus Bertelli Report

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    the quickening
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can be attention deficit without being hyperactive. Outwards, it seems completely different from ADHD, but the inner troubles are the same. Not being able to tell what's important vs. mere fluff is one of the biggest things.

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    #27

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them Disappears every night, rather than spending time with me and the kids. Doesn’t help with cleaning up after dinner, even though I always cook. Complains about being tired when I am the only one getting up with our baby for the night feed. Granted, he does have insomnia and got s****y sleep before the baby, but I’m the one who endured a horrible pregnancy, Delivery and now newborn sleep deprivation, so I kind of don’t want to hear it.

    ronsinblush , Alena Darmel Report

    #28

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them Her brothers are a******s, I totally dislike them.

    Just_a_tired_banana , https://www.pexels.com/photo/two-men-wearing-casual-clothing-standing-at-brick-wall-8133026/ Report

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    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It would be hard to find two people less alike than my brother and my husband. But they get along, they are both decent chaps.

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    #29

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them How low her patience is & how fast she can get irritated, and i know how she is & I know she doesn’t mean it 99% of the time, but sometimes it has me overthinking and I feel like she just hates me

    NearbyPage6955 , Keira Burton Report

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    Realistic Optimist
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Honestly, if this isn't being addressed, you should consider therapy, either couples or personal. It's impossible to have a healthy relationship without healthy conflict resolution, and you feeling that way is a huge sign of poor conflict resolution. And, please don't blame yourself for feeling insecure in your relationship! Accept that your are feeling a certain way for a reason and know that your emotions are telling you something. Really listen to your emotions, and when you're ready, go to your partner. If she cares about you, she will listen and take you seriously. If she doesn't or gaslights you, it's a toxic relationship.

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    #30

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them I wake up teetering on the edge of the bed, every f*****g night. We have a king size bed and she is petite, I tell her but it doesn’t matter. Every. F*****g. Night.

    1980pzx , cottonbro studio Report

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    Kelly H. Wilder
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Separate beds can be a wonderful solution to many sleep issues. We can not help how active we are in our sleep, so if you are a still sleeper with a moving partner sleeping separately may be best for both of you. This could also be a help for differences in temperature preference or if one person is touch-averse.

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    #31

    sometimes he just won’t stop talking. he has terrible awareness of when someone’s trying to leave a conversation. i’ll be trying to watch a movie or something and he’ll just be chatting away at me. and when he drinks it gets 1000x worse. i just want to say “ i love you but please shut the hell up” but i don’t wanna hurt his feelings.

    he’s still really cute tho.

    edit: okay thanks for all the advice guys but we’re actually doing fine, this is just a small annoyance that he’s aware of and we do joke about it together.

    anon Report

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    A girl
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This. I genuinely do not want to know who won in highschool football last night. Ever.

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    #32

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them I feel loved but not wanted

    Powerful-Art1213 , SHVETS production Report

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    #33

    We have large differences in sex drives. She often feels hounded and i often feel neglected.

    mlaeladma Report

    #34

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them Everything else about her is perfect. But I could say something and she just gets quiet and passive for days at a time. Like what the f**k did I do, I genuinely don’t know and I can’t apologize if I don’t know what I did.

    A_Wallaby , Ketut Subiyanto Report

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    Bear Hall
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It sounds heavier than most of the stuff I read so far. I suspect some underlying issue behind constant noncommunication. Seek counselling before it's too late.

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    #35

    She posts motivational posters on Facebook. It cringes me the f out.

    kambinks Report

    #36

    His farting is so annoying. Constantly ripping farts. His mom is the same, says it’s genetic and all her side of the family farts an obnoxious amount. We’ll be eating dinner at the table and she will lift her leg and just fart so loud so now her kids do it. It’s so f*****g disgusting. Farting in his sleep on my legs. All the god damn time.

    1finewire5 Report

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    MichelleDonut
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe they have a genetic food intolerance and need to quit eating the things that make them gassy? I bet they haven't bothered to try an elimination diet.

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    #37

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them We’re completely different regarding physical affection.

    TunaFishSammie321 , Timur Weber Report

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    Bear Hall
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's very hard. Without finding common ground it can easily kill a relationship.

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    #38

    We don't fight a lot. We've been together for 3.5 years, and maybe fought 5 times ever? But when we do, he goes SILENT. Goes to bed. Won't talk. Freaks out if I even dare get near him. He'll talk the next day. Maybe. But even then it can't be a conversation. He says his piece and that's all he allows. It's such an unhealthy way of resolving issues.

    coffeebarry Report

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    Flora Porter
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is bigger than it sounds. One of the things you need to know about someone in the first three months is how they, and how you as a couple, will resolve arguments. Doesn't matter what the argument's about: if you're with someone who can't discuss it, take responsibility for their actions and work with you to find a way through, it's going to be a showstopper at some point.

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    #39

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them She's a slob. Pile dishes on. Cloths go on the floor. Cups left everywhere. You wouldn't think it if you were company.

    Edit: just to answer some the posts cuz I woke up with a lot of responses.

    1. I'm not dating or married to your significant other. I'm pretty sure.
    2. It may be depression but once I "moved in" with her, I started to notice how bad it really is. She does get very proud when she buys things to help with it. Though this could be it for some of you all. Check facts open a discussion, it is a sign.
    3. To those who are suggestions things like ADHD. Already tested and no, it isn't that. I think its just the procrastination side. If you think this may pertain to you, get tested if you can.
    4. If you don't want this to continue in your relationship you'll either need to devise a system or talk about it now. For example, most of my partner's cloths on the ground end up on her side of the room. If they don't end up in the basket then they don't get washed. I go looking for cups to reuse. And as much as this post is overgeneralized, the more you talk and work the better progress gets made. She does dishes while she cooks now so there's less, she went from like 12 cups to 2. Like anything in a relationship it take work, encouragement, and patience if you want to be with them through something like those. Trust me, there's habits she hates about me that I'm working on as well. (Picking my fingers, chewing my nails, etc)

    Edit 2: fixing words because people like to bring it to everyone's attention.

    Codmando , Gary Barnes Report

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    #40

    He has absolutely toxic gamer rage, to the point where I am immediately on edge whenever he plays a game where pvp is the focus. I actively dissuage him from playing such games, and when we coop I do my best to be overly positive. He never sends hate mail or anything that would affect someone else, and he only does it when its just me and him. I guess it's nice that he feels comfortable enough to express himself around me, it just not nice to be around that kind of anger when I am a very low stress person.

    EDIT: Guys, relax! He doesn't get violent, or lash out, and he has never taken it out on me or anyone else. It's just not nice to be around, and I happen to be very receptive to such emotions due to the past (not involving him). Judging by some of the comments it sounds like he's not the only one who needs to chill out.

    ACalcifiedHeart Report

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    Dainty72
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No-one should be on edge around their partner, no matter what the reason is! Another childish fool

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    #41

    She's a low-key hoarder who then gets upset at me for our house not being tidy and well organized.

    It's not trash or dead cats or whatever you see in reality tv. It's just stuff. Continuously accumulating things and not wanting to let them go. Yet still being mad when we have no room.

    I recently organized our coat closet. She had coats she hasn't worn in 5 years in there. Wouldn't donate them. Had to fold them up and put them in a storage bin in our basement. I did this KNOWING that bin will sit unused and untouched in our basement for the next decade.

    Same thing with our son's baby clothes. We have probably 20 full totes of clothing in the basement. Won't sell it. Won't donate it. Won't toss it, even stuff that's stained or ripped. It just sits.

    Boxes of scrapbooking stuff from the two months she was into scrapbooking. That was 15 years and two moves ago. Stacked in the basement.

    Boxes of sewing supplies and material. Mostly untouched. To sit forever unused.

    Shoes. Leggings. Shirts. She could open a store.

    I clean our coffee table off. By the next day it's stacked with junk mail, boxes, books, art supplies.

    I've talked to her about it, but never the full extent of how anxious and angry it makes me. The worst part is our son has adopted some of her practices. I see myself growing old and drowning in a house full of their garbage.

    Usually after we talk she makes a half hearted attempt to clean up or stop bringing new things into the house. After a week or so it starts to slip and she's back to her usual routine.

    offspring515 Report

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    kansasmagic
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Once I cleaned up a bunch of stuff at my MiL's house - like old shopping bags strewn across the floor. I mean, it was *trash*. Afterwards, she retrieved the stuff from the trash can, my wife yelled at her, and we left two days early. Lesson learned: I'll just stick to cleaning up my own messes.

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    #42

    Let me start. She chews so loudly. She scream sneezes. She never takes my point of view into consideration. She is inconsiderate, selfish and self centered. And just came out and told me not to be honest with her, because that gives her anxiety.

    And this is the part I tell you that I love her. But nope. I don’t. We have a 3 year old that I Love to death. She pulled a switchAroo once we got married. There were small signs. But you know what they say; “when you look at the world through rose color glasses, the red flags are just flags.”

    BigBadBootyDaddy10 Report

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    kansasmagic
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Something that bothers me: when SO starts doing something new (or at least new to you), then excuses it with "I've *always* been like this".

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    #43

    Her family is too detail oriented about insignificant stuff. Like, I’ll have to explain what aisle I went down in the grocery store before I can keep explaining what happened to me while shopping. Or her parents go into excruciating detail about what they ordered for lunch at Wendy’s. For f**k sake I love her and her family to death but god I couldn’t care less about half the conversations they have.

    It sounds bad and shallow, but conversation with her extended family is even worse. I usually stick with “not much, what’s new with you?” “Oh wow that’s interesting” and walk away.

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    Jay Scales
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh yes - my ex MIL used to bore the pants off me describing every boring little detail of something.

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    #44

    How do you tell your wife her breath STINKS???

    Tomegunn1 Report

    #45

    She sings off-key

    Edit: a lot of folks have gotten the wrong idea from this, I hate her singing but I’ll never ask her to change it. It makes her happy and her happiness is my priority. I can’t tell her that I hate it because it’ll make her less happy.

    rustyscrotum69 Report

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    Bear Hall
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is your biggest problem with her? Get some ear buds and worship her.

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    #46

    How she needs me to take care of her in little things. I don’t mind driving her to appointments or cooking her dinner. Its the “Turn off the lights” when she’s right next to Em.

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    #47

    She puts the eggs at the bottom of the shopping bags! On purpose!!!
    She says it gives the bag structure, the crazy lady.

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    Michael Braisher
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because it's FUN: https://youtu.be/sbXtXQ1xwqQ?list=PLlu6_-FiYhk-GKK-pifZp9KGbE_hel1d3&t=271

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    #48

    His bathroom habits.
    He has IBS and anxiety, which fuels his IBS. He goes to the bathroom several times a day, and it is not quiet.
    Several times a day I hear him having diarrhea and loud gross farts

    I would never mention this to him, as he gets embarrassed to even let a tiny fart out in front of me, but I try to be understanding as this is not his fault. But hearing loud farts and poop flying into toilet water a few times a day is grossing me out.

    Thanks for letting me vent.

    saltyredditbae Report

    #49

    Amazing partner but his dental hygiene needs a looooooooooot of work. His teeth have a lot of plaque, yellowing and cracking. He has a real fear of the dentist so I try not to push him to go. Instead I suggest that he’s uses mouthwash or floss or whatever else I can suggest. I have even told him I’ll go with him to the dentist. Again, not pushing it on him but oh boy I’d really love an improvement for his dental care

    EDIT: Thank you for all the suggestions! I think I’m gonna sit down with him and actually have a stern talk to him about it, instead of just giving him teeth care suggestions. Finding out that bad dental hygiene can f**k up your heart health just scared tf outta me and I’m not trying to lose him in any way (28M btw).

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    #50

    His newfound beard and mustache. It's horrible. He just can't grow a good one, I'm sorry. It's patchy and weird and mostly just on his neck.

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    #51

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them That, as a medical practitioner, she uses mental illness and medications as an excuse for every bad and self destructive thing. I don’t care anymore just fix it!

    anon , Budgeron Bach Report

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    Bear Hall
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mental illness makes things EXTREMELY hard, but not impossible. But as long as we are not delusional we have to consider the consequences of our behaviour no matter what causes them. If she acts irresponsibly without seriously TRYING to address her problems though sounds narcissistic.

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    #52

    She farts in her sleep, and they smell TERRIBLE and are as loud as a freight train. She eats a healthy and high fiber diet, and is usually pretty courteous around me and others when she's conscious. But there are times when the smell even wakes me up in the middle of the night because she just lets them rip. She knows she does it and is self conscious about it, and I tell her that I don't notice and it doesn't bother me. I do notice, and I am bothered.

    Before someone brings it up yes, she's seen a doctor, GI specialist, and dietician. We've played around with different remedies and diets but as far as we can tell she's perfectly healthy and just has a tendency to drop death bombs.

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    Nice Beast Ludo
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is so mortifying I feel bad for her. When I was really sick every time I fell asleep I would s**t clear diarrhea all in the bed. It didn't smell and was mostly water because I could barely eat and when I did, it all came out before I could even finish. It was so humiliating. I would pile towels beneath myself and even though I could barely stand I would clean myself and the bed before he woke up. He would have taken care of it and did have to a few times. I started wearing depends which was really embarrassing at 31 years old. It's kind of you not to mention it because she can't help it and it might make her develop insomnia if she is afraid to sleep because of it

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    #53

    She wants me to take her on dates, but she has terrible social anxiety, terrible chronic pain, and walking around a lot causes her to pass out.

    She says I can do an at home date, but she seems to not count anything we do at home as dates, and doesn’t appear to be aware that she does this.

    Also she’s on the spectrum which makes it difficult to interact with her sometimes.

    (I’ll probably talk to her; she’s pretty good with criticism and our entire 11 year relationship has been about open communication)

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    #54

    Quite a few things but the one thing I'll share here is that his cologne and his axe deodorant clash. Literally smells like diarrhea.

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    #55

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them She has a hard time cleaning up after herself.

    I work full time during the week, she works weekends. The house is a mess during the week and spotless during the weekend. Monday night, I come home and it's a mess again. Oof, lady. Get it together.

    And the way she drinks. Gulps everything like she out of air and the only way to get more is to suck it off the bottom of whatever vessel she's drinking out of. Food noises kill me and she knows it but the gulping is unconscious so I try not to let it bother me.

    Love her more than everything. She's my best friend in all ways. But those are the two.

    ArrdenGarden , Jason Leung Report

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    #56

    She repeats the the same story 5 times while telling the original story

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    #57

    She's the worst dirty talker I've ever heard of.

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    #58

    That f*****g blue sweater …

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    Heather Lambie
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    An "accidental " death maybe required. Washing machines can be wicked on sweaters!!

    #59

    I’m a Cliff’s Notes guy & she is an encyclopedia at telling stories.

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    #60

    She's late for. Everything.

    E. V. E. R. Y. T. H. I. N. G.

    I actually remember vividly the one time ever in our 2 decades of being together where we were actually early for something.

    She agreed to meet someone at 1? She shows at 1:20...

    Its infuriating!

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    Deborah B
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tell her earlier start times. You're meeting at 12.30? Tell her 12, or 12.15.

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    #61

    Sometimes she doesn’t say “I love you” back if we’ve had a fight that we haven’t had a chance to work through yet. That s**t hurts, I know we’ve been fighting but I just want the reassurance that it’s not over before I go to work.

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    #62

    She thinks she is good at finding things and is very "helpful" in searching.

    "Have you looked in your pants pocket?" No, I usually don't carry around a cheese grater in my pocket. "Did you leave it in the car?" Probably not. "Did you use it when you gave the dog a bath?" What now?

    After twenty such questions she usually is able to find the item exactly where she moved it the day before and is quite self-satisfied that she has "helped me out".

    jumpy_monkey Report

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    Spocks's Mom
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Peasant. I always carry spare cheese graters in my pockets. The come in handy when I bathe the dog.

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    #63

    he is overly positive to the point where i can't believe him when he's trying to make me feel better/cheer me up

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    #64

    They refuse to eat leftovers. But I don't tell them that because I benefit most from my cooking!! Ha!!

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    #65

    I love when she's happy. I love that she feels joy.... but that laugh is shrill enough to raise the dead

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    #66

    My wife has a habit of over explaining EVERYTHING. How was her day? You'll get a full detailed description of what everyone said and how it was said and who it was said to. The extended descriptions of every minor incident thru out her day drives me nuts.....but I love her and just sort of "uh huh", "oh wow" my way thru them because I know she needs to vent......it's exhausting (now 11 years in) but I know she does it because she knows she can confide in me and not have to worry about me blabbing about what she said to others.

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    Slap Shot
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You just described my husband of 25 years. Every detail for 25 years. And I still love him.

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    #67

    I literally love the s**t out of this man, and he is the best thing that has ever happened to me, but he spells "bagel" as "beagel" and he shows me too many old vines😂 totally minor complaints and not at all worth bringing up. Annoying but a little funny too.

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    #68

    She takes every fight or disagreement as her fighting for her fundamental independence as a woman, even when I’m just trying to plan stuff or express myself to her.

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    #69

    One of her son.

    He is autistic, 7 years old and cannot be independant.

    She takes her bath and shower with him, sleep with him because he cannot without her, she wipes him when he goes to poop.

    On yop of that he is very agressive, the very first day they came to my house he found all of my collectibles statues and broke them all in a matter of minutes. When I went downstairs my heart sank but what can I do ? What is done is done. It was about 5000$ worth of collectibles.

    What is hurting me the most is that she has a very frail health and he is completely destroying her. I do my best to be always at their appartment and doing the most chores possible, but even then, he needs way too much out of a "single" mother of 3.

    This is the only thing I dislike about her and I feel like a total a*****e.

    I'm still hoping that with time I'll get to love him but so far it doesn't work out

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    Kelly H. Wilder
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This was hard for me to read. That is essentially me with my son, but he is 18. I don't shower with him, but I do have to give him his shower. I don't sleep with him, but I do sleep in a recliner in his room. He can not clean himself properly after toileting, so I have to help with that, too. He also went through a very aggressive phase to the point I once had to call in law enforcement. We spent three very difficult nights in the children's hospital. The aggressiveness has subsided as puberty has wrapped up, but he still has frequent meltdown days. I feel very sorry for OP. Not everyone can handle what dealing with special-needs people requires. That doesn't mean OP is a terrible person. It is something to address earlier rather than later, though.

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    #70

    She would tell the same 15 stories over and over again. There was never anything new

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    #71

    An old partner of mine used to stand behind me, right outside of my peripheral vision and watch me cook. He would always critique my technique, or tell me how I could do it better. I have cooking anxiety because of him. Drove me INSANE.

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    Justme
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you criticize or critique a chore someone else is doing… then the chore becomes yours.

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    #72

    30 People Anonymously Reveal The Thing They Hate About Their Partner But Could Never Tell Them Mine is lame. Her time management skills suck.

    Temporary_Quality_66 , Meruyert Gonullu Report

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    #73

    Someone knew that he knows and "had a great friendship/whatever" with dies like every couple months. He thinks everyone he has had any interaction with is his friend and takes it way too personally.

    A few years back he told me his best friend died, I assumed - as any reasonable person would- this was a great friend that he had talked to and hung out with a lot, maybe because of life they drifted a little bit. Nope. It was a kid he knew when he was 4 and hadn't spoken to since he was 6. It had been a solid 2 decades since they had any contact except maybe the occasional Facebook heart or whatever.

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    CD King
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My husband holds on to the kids that were mean to him in school. He was not bullied per se but just small slights. He is almost 50 and has not seen or spoke with these kids in 40 plus years. I guess some folks are just over emotional about somethings.

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    #74

    They’re pretty bad at taking accountability for their actions. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard something like “Yea I know I was being an a*****e, but why did people have to be mean or distant in response? They should be more mature.”

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    Jay Scales
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Another problem that is unlikely to improve over time unless they get a wake up call.

    #75

    When she's killing a moment, A killjoy type i don't know why she's doing that or she just tease me

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    #76

    His horrible f*****g chewing noises. I have never been able to stand it and because he has dental issues he always smacks his lips and chews with his mouth open. I makes me physically ill.

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    #77

    Her incessant need to clean the house to such a hardcore degree when someone is just coming over to pick up something for 5 minutes.

    We have kids, people get that there are going to be toys in the living room. It doesnt need to look like a hotel lobby.

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    Nice Beast Ludo
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is a problem I would really like to have. Better than being too embarrassed to have anyone over atcall cause you can't get it cleaned up

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    #78

    She takes off her shoes and never puts them away, currently our kitchen has 3 pairs of shoes, living room has two pairs, by the front door has a pair.

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    #79

    She walks around the house while brushing her teeth... which is already weird enough since I'm a "stand at the sink" kind of guy, but for some reason it's brushing wherever I'm at. I'll be watching TV in the living room and she's brushing her teeth right behind me. It's so freaking annoying but I don't wanna say anything.

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    #80

    That morning breath. It lingers long after he wakes up so I gotta open a window or spray febreze or something.

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    #81

    She’s very emotionally smart. But sometimes I wish she were more traditionally smart too.

    I feel like an a*****e just by typing it.

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    kansasmagic
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My advice: don't seek or expect everything you want from one person. It's ok to have other friends for intellectual stimulation, or just make time to read etc.

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    #82

    That he’s super insecure.

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    #83

    She doesn’t care about my interests whatsoever. Will be breaking up in the next days

    jawassollichsagen Report

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    David Paterson
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited)

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Don't. Find someone else who cares about your interests. On the web. Unless your interests include kinky sex, on which case she's well rid of you.

    #84

    How he doesn't value himself enough to go to the doctor and get his health issues taken care of until last minute and almost dying. I hate how he doesn't see his beautiful face the way I do. I hate how he can't see himself through my eyes.

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    #85

    They’re cringy. Sometimes it’s cute, sometimes is second hand embarrassment. Love them either way!

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    #86

    They can be selfish and it can be hurtful

    smoke2957 Report

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    #87

    That I have gotten used to the fact that when something's wrong, he'll stonewall and/or verbally abuse me till I've figured out what's wrong or he feels like talking about it

    anon Report

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    Kelly H. Wilder
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seek therapy (for him, you, both) and seriously consider getting out of this relationship. You are worth more than this. Verbal abuse can escalate to other forms of abuse. Please be wary, know your value, and protect yourself. 🤗

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    #88

    How boring he’s become as we’ve gotten older.

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    #89

    It's not that she farts it's just how much she enjoys it. She laughs about it each time and I've given up mentioning it. If I burp though.....

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    #90

    her inability to understand how work is supposed to go. I understand not liking your job, but quitting over minor inconveniences and irrelevance to her major (graphic design). I’m worried that when she gets a graphical design based job, she’ll hate it because of a niche problem she has to deal with that she didn’t expect and feel like she wasted money on school for something she doesn’t like.

    I also thoroughly dislike how they treat her brother with autism. I grew up with my aunt who has Down’s syndrome (about as severely affected mentally) and I understand that it’s hard, both are challenging to deal with. But they’ve had child services called on the house 6 times for what her brother has said he’s been through, and the father doesn’t even reference him as son, he’s “that guy”.

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    Kelly H. Wilder
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The job thing is an annoyance, but the brother needs someone to stand up for him. Silence is complicity. It's reprehensible to me that CPS has been called SIX times and no one is changing things for the brother. It is unspeakably difficult to find foster or other placements for special-needs people, so CPS tends to delay removal unless the situation is physically dire. Please speak to her about it. You may be a catalyst for positive change. 🤗

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    #91

    She reminds me of my mom and my mom is a crazy b***h so i have mommy issues i dont know how to tell her that though

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    #92

    Two things and he's mildly aware of it. He has neuropathy in his legs and is in constant pain even with medication. He says he talks to his doctor but I'm suspecting he is lying because he hates doctors and rarely has time to make appointments. I hate it because I can't do anything to help relieve the pain. I miss playing footsie with him.

    The other thing is he is a very picky eater so dinner is always simple or i like to call 'kid friendly'. Eat your freaking vegetables! Buttered carrots don't count!

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    #93

    probably the biggest one has to do with her addiction to her phone. she’s on it all the time. to the point that our small kids say things to her. but when i text her, it takes a long time to get a response.

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    Nice Beast Ludo
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is sad. Play with and enjoy your kids when they are little. Don't spend their childhood on your phone. I fear for these kids when they get older they are going to have so many issues.

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    #94

    Let’s the little things ruin her days and doesn’t have any real hobbies

    edit: hate is a strong word, I don’t hate anything about her id just like to see her make strides to improve which she is doing at her own pace

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    #95

    Not quite hate. But he has a persistent self-doubt that sometimes pains him. It's like reverse Dunning-Kruger syndrome.

    I do my best to support and encourage him when it crops up. He's one of what a friend of mine calls 'hail fellow, well met' people, and is universally loved by all who know him. Yet every so often he questions his worth and competence.

    I sometimes wish I could show him what he looks like to me. But all I can do is be there when he needs me, so I always am.

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    #96

    Her constant talking. I love this woman, but she talks all day/night. I don’t have the heart to tell her how much it bothers me. She is a bartender and talks all day at work too. It never stops.

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    #97

    Ugh idk man I really can't take the volume of talking she wants to do

    It's not the quality of it's the quantity I swear

    But I'm aware it's a failing on my part as well, because I'm admittedly a s**t listener, we could both probably point out situations where me listening would of saved us both a lot of grief

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    #98

    She is unaware of the space needed to keep me on the sidewalk, or from bumping into people and other objects like lampposts as we hold hands while walking.

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    #99

    That he’s an angry person who lacks empathy but if I try to tell him, that just makes him even angrier. Walking on eggshells is not cool.

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    Jay Scales
    Community Member
    1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Get out whilst you're still young - this is unlikely to improve & will eventually take a toll on your mental & even physical health. I KNOW, I've been there.

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