30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life

We go through life being continuously reminded of our limits. But instead of trying to hide them, we should stay humble — it's what allows us to remain open to new ideas, perspectives, and experiences, all of which are essential for personal growth.

So in an attempt to remind you that no person is born all-knowing, we present a discussion we found on the subreddit 'No Stupid Questions.' It began when a platform user CelesteAvoir asked others to share the facts that they've "learned embarrassingly late" and has blossomed into a fascinating collection of stories, adding some levity to the universal quest for knowledge.

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30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life Until 2018 I thought Elon Musk wasa kind of truck stop bathroom cologne, from the makers of Jovan Musk. I really wish it was true.

Longjumping_Choice_6 , SpaceX Report

Final score:

113points

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G A 5 months ago

Elon Musk. Leaves a lingering odour of b******t.

75points

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30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life My uncle once told me if I got a thousand bee stings I’d die. He meant all at once. For years, I thought he meant cumulatively. And I kept count.

isaacgunson , Pixabay Report

Final score:

106points

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G A 5 months ago

You'd have to be the crappest bee keeper ever.....

24points

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30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life Can I point to something that other ppl were wrong about? I was in a room full of ppl discussing a cruise some of them took to and around Alaska. I asked if they saw any narwhals, and they all - the entire room looked at me dumbfounded, and some started laughing. Every single one of them thought narwhals were mythical creatures. I still can’t believe it. I guess they should be embarrassed bc I don’t think many of them even looked it up and I guess I should be a little embarrassed that ppl actually don’t think they’re real.

One-Winner-8441 , Jessica Simpson Report

Final score:

100points

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PattyK 5 months ago

Why should OP feel embarrassed? The people who didn’t know that narwhals are real are the ones who should be embarrassed. And ashamed.

44points

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30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life I'm from Belgium and I was nearly 30 when I found out what really happened in congo. We just casually brushed over that part in high school history as "it was the fashion at the time to colonise. We left when they were self-sufficient enough to run their own country, and then they effed it up".

Evening-Dizzy , Ron Lach Report

Final score:

96points

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Samuel Pelatan 5 months ago (edited)

Yeah kinda hard to run a country when your colonisers left with your hands

59points

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30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life Hump day is referring to the middle of the week, like over the hump, and not the day everyone humps. I always found it weird at my office job when someone would say happy hump day, like, dude, I’m pretty sure you can’t say that here. I was 27 when I realized.

Paranoid_Orangutan , RDNE Stock project Report

Final score:

94points

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G A 5 months ago

Quasimodo Appreciation Day!

33points

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Oh, another one. Not me, but a friend of mine. She didn’t realize that (U.S.) military members got paid. She thought “an all volunteer military” meant they worked for free. When we explained it to her, it was hilarious. She goes, “You mother f*****s got PAID!?!?!? What the hell have I been thanking everyone for their service for!?!?!?”

We laughed for weeks.

anon Report

Final score:

83points

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TotallyNOTAFox 5 months ago (edited)

The word "Soldier" has it's roots in the latin word soldarius (one having pay). We in Germany call the payment "Sold" (soft S) and the people receiving it "Soldaten" based on that, too

40points

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30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life That the bad moon is on the rise, not the bathroom on the right. I ruined that song for my mom when I told her what I heard lmao.

Conscious_Abroad_877 , Ron Lach Report

Final score:

76points

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SBocker78 5 months ago

A friend in HS ruined The Bangles "Manic Monday" for me when she started singing it "Just Another Man To F**k Me". I still can't listen to it without laughing.

37points

James Frail 5 months ago

'Cause that's my fun day?

8points

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JDartz 5 months ago

Now I am not going to be able to get that out of my head either!

3points

Axel Tojo 5 months ago

I always heard Axe's "Rock 'n roll party in the street" as "Rock'n roll porn industry". 😛

1point

Mgtow Smurf 5 months ago

♫ excuse me while I kiss the sky♫ or ♫excuse me while I kiss this guy♫

4points

Khavrinen 5 months ago

"The ants are my friends, they're blowing in the wind..."

3points

Pa Pa Panda 5 months ago

Owner of a lonely heart but replace it with.....Owner of a stinky fart.

3points

Matt Smith 5 months ago

Entire articles can (and probably have been) written about misheard lyrics

1point

Mike F 5 months ago

You sing your lyric and I'll sing mine!

1point

Whoopdeedoo 5 months ago

😂

0points

Dread Pirate Roberts 5 months ago

My mom sings it like that to be funny lol kind of like with the song Blinded by the Light, I sing, "crapped out like a deuce, another boner in the night".

0points

Gina Gartola 5 months ago

Rockin around the christmas tree...later we'll have some f***ing pie and we'll do some carolling.

0points

Thekla Hagenbuch 5 months ago

Me too! 2 months ago, I figured this out! I'm 45.

0points

Ella H 5 months ago

For me the big revelation was that it was not "I guess it rains down in Africa".

0points

Milton’s Assistant 5 months ago

What you call ruined I call happy nostalgia

0points

Janice Strickland 5 months ago

We sing it that way anyway

0points

Caroline Nagel 5 months ago

Message in a Bottle by The Police: a classmate thought they sang 'since I broke my nose', instead of 'wrote my note'.

0points

Genevieve Smith 5 months ago

I also used to sing there's a bathroom on the right. And Eric Clapton's Knocking on Heaven's door, was cotching all over the floor.

0points

Suby 5 months ago

I thought "Boys of Summer" was "poisoned summer." Listen to it, that's what it sounds like.

0points

Zaach 5 months ago

Cisco Kid Was a Friend of Mine - I thought "Eat the salted peanuts out the can" was 'softest p3nis in the land'

0points

CheshirePhrogg 5 months ago

Caught in a pair of pants

0points

Robert Trebor 5 months ago

Hello darkness, smile friend...

0points

_-DungeonKeeper-_ 5 months ago

One song, I think it's called no place, the singer had what I can only hope and assume was an accent. One line was "You're the girl I wanna be with" but the word "with" was said pretty fast so I could barely hear it and the next line started with "and" and I definitely misheard that.... very concerningly.

0points

geezeronthehill 5 months ago

Gotta love a mondegreen.

0points

BoredBranzino 5 months ago

That joke came about less than 5 minutes after the CCR song got airplay, wayyyyyy back in the day. However, as a public service announcement, my older sister says to: Never leave your pizza burning.

0points

Binny Tutera 5 months ago

Secret Asian man

0points

Lisa Lackey 5 months ago

elton john's "the girl with colitis goes by".

0points

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30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life That a quart is a **quart**er of a gallon. Duh.

thamonsta , Meruyert Gonullu Report

Final score:

72points

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Annik Perrot 5 months ago

TIL, and I'm not embarrassed in the least. How much is that in liters? /j

49points

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I once accidentally shouted 'I love necrophilia!' during my class in 10th grade. I had just read a book about a young teenage necromancer and got the words mixed up. We can cringe together.

asterierrantry Report

Final score:

72points

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Hippopotamuses 5 months ago

Oh dear. I'll bet that silenced the class for a moment.

30points

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#10

Oh my gosh, my time to shine.

So I was in like 5th grade when Pluto was declassified as a planet and demoted to dwarf planet. Heard about it in science class, wrote in an assignment that it was sad, yada yada yada. Well my brother at that time was 4 years older and told me that the reason it was declassified was because it imploded and was now the size of like a basketball.

I spent my whole life believing this. Then when I was like 21, I was lying in bed with my husband and just blurted out "Bro remember when we were kids and Pluto imploded and they declassified it as a planet? That was wild." You know trying to bond over our shared childhood trauma. My husband, shocked, was like "Wat." And I explained the whole thing to him and he was like "That did not happen, you are insane." I learned the truth then and there as a grown married woman. I was horrified. Talked to my brother and he didn't even remember, just that he used to tell me all kinds of made up s**t. It was one of the craziest realizations I've ever had.

Madi27 Report

Final score:

63points

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lovemy suffolk 5 months ago (edited)

My oldest sister did the same type of thing. Lol. She told me , when i was about 6 yo, that if i ever said aloud or even thought the words " damn the river styx" that hades would have me burn in hell for eternity. I spent a good portion of the next couple days in tears, until my dad coaxed out of me what was wrong. He then went and had 'a talk" with my big sister for terrorizing me. Of course, it never occurred to me...by her own testimony, she too would have been consigned to the fiery pits. LOL, Sibs. >.

23points

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#11

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life A cup is a unit of measurement. I always wondered how you could have one cup of something in a recipe when everyone has different cups.

TheDemonMaker , Anna Shvets Report

Final score:

59points

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Kirsty Jackowski 5 months ago

And the cup measurement is different between countries.

27points

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#12

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life The little arrow on my dash beside the gas pump icon points to the side of the car with the gas door. Rental cars were a 50/50 shot of getting it right if I forgot to look first before driving, so it was a good thing to learn. At 40 years old. Haha.

LemmyLola , Abdulvahap Demir Report

Final score:

58points

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Robert T 5 months ago

* on some cars, not all. If it has an arrow, then yes it does, but not all cars have arrows, and the fuel hose may or may not be on the correct side to indicate it either.

9points

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#13

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life That the song 'The Macarena' is actually about a woman who was sleeping around while her husband was a conscript at war. The "one and a two and a three Macarena'!" lyric is actually counting outloud the amount of men she had sex with.

We sang that song and did that dance in gym class in middle school!!

InfernalOrgasm , LosDelRioVEVO Report

Final score:

57points

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Rebelliousslug 5 months ago

This one and Who Let The Dogs Out really shouldn’t have been so heavily used in school

31points

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#14

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life That Rhode Island isn’t an Island. I learned that at 53 years old.

vanbrima , Mohan Nannapaneni Report

Final score:

56points

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Rob D 5 months ago

If you're not from the US understandable. If you are, get out.

7points

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#15

I learned about Medicaid eligibility in my late twenties. I was unemployed due to untreated depression for about a decade. I didn't know there was medicaid and disability benefits for people. If I had known earlier my life could have been drastically different.

Mindless_Wrap1758 Report

Final score:

55points

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ZombieMommy 5 months ago

Most people don't learn about it until they need it. Medicare is another one and it is WAY more confusing, learn about Medicare before you have to get it at 65 it will make your life so much easier. - caseworker

20points

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#16

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life I thought the term "birthday suit" meant a suit you're literally supposed to wear on your birthday.

SteadfastEnd , Kampus Production Report

Final score:

54points

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Anonymouse 5 months ago

it IS what you were wearing on your birth day... so...

31points

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#17

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life Until I was 19, I thought fly fishing was fishing out of a plane or helicopter. I figured it just flew really low and slow and that they had really long fishing lines.

bananafishin , Tomasz Filipek Report

Final score:

50points

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René Sauer 5 months ago

Well, what is it? I always thought you would use flies as bait. But then how would you get enough for that?

4points

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#18

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life That cattle is just the species name for cows and bulls. I thought it was a closely related but separate species until like grad school 😭😂.

AstroWolf11 , Mark Stebnicki Report

Final score:

49points

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Jeevesssssss 5 months ago

And oxen are just cows with a job.

33points

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#19

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life I've never heard someone say Yosemite out loud, I've been reading it as Yo sem ight lmao.

Asleep-Trifle-8645 , Mental Health America (MHA) Report

Final score:

48points

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G A 5 months ago

Calling out a fellow jew "Yo, Semite"!

40points

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#20

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life That fallopian tubes aren't connected to the ovaries. They have finger-like appendages and float around over to where the egg is released to grab the egg. The egg just free floats in your abdomen void waiting to get picked up. Oh and if you only have one tube, it can make it over to the other ovary to get the egg there sometimes.

Stunning_Patience_78 , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:

47points

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TotallyNOTAFox 5 months ago (edited)

Statistically 1/3 of women also get cramps during ovulation

8points

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#21

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life Pumpkin spice does not actually taste like pumpkin :/.

MAMidCent , Pixabay Report

Final score:

46points

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leendadll 5 months ago

Pumpkin Spice is the spices that go into american pumpkin pie - clove, cinnamon, nutmeg.

35points

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#22

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life It’s chest of drawers and not Chester drawers.

Jwalkinworm , Keegan Checks Report

Final score:

46points

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Lesley Relph 5 months ago

Those drawers are the wrong way round, it should make a Union Jack!

20points

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#23

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life That Jessica Rabbit wasn't actually a rabbit and that "Rabbit" was her last name because she married Roger. I was in my 20s when I figured it out.

ThePhiff , Kay Pike Report

Final score:

42points

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TotallyNOTAFox 5 months ago (edited)

Didn't stop her from playing "Petty Cake" with somebody else though

10points

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#24

Women don't urinate out of their vaginas. There's a small hole called the urethra opening.

tex83tex83 Report

Final score:

42points

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TotallyNOTAFox 5 months ago (edited)

Also if women squirt it's not from the urethra (common misconception, too), it's liquid from the Skene gland with the openings located on 4 and 8 o'clock around it.

36points

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#25

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life That the ABC song and twinkle twinkle little star song have the same melody. I was 27 years old when I realized it. Blew my mind then 😂.

khitanona , Wellington Cunha Report

Final score:

42points

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Molly Whuppie 5 months ago (edited)

they are all loosely based upon a french melody "Ah, vous dirai-je, maman" from the mid 1700s. Mozart also wrote some variations of it.

29points

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#26

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life The crust of the bread does not in fact contain all the nutrients.

ergonaut , Geraud pfeiffer Report

Final score:

41points

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TotallyNOTAFox 5 months ago (edited)

Why would it? It's just dough that got exposed to the heat the most

18points

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#27

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life A girl I knew thought roadside memorials were actual graves.

Midlifetoker , chb1848 Report

Final score:

41points

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Jesse 5 months ago

I thought that too until I was six

11points

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#28

All I knew is when I turned 21 is wine is red or white. I tried to order white wine and the waiter asked which one. I asked what they had and picked the one I felt most confident pronouncing.

ForestWanderingOne Report

Final score:

41points

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Ross “Sarcastic Dad” 5 months ago

Best thing I ever learned was the word, "house". Can bail you out of a lot of dinner date situations where you're at a fancier place then you're comfortable with. "I'll take the house white wine/whiskey/whatever".

26points

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#29

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life Carrot cake is really made with carrots. I thought because they usually pipe a little carrot on the top and the fact you ate it around Easter they just called it that for no other reason.

Garden_Circus , chudesabyvaut Report

Final score:

41points

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Francois 5 months ago (edited)

Why on earth limit eating carrot cake to Easter?

45points

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#30

30 Things People Learned Embarrassingly Late In Life Its coleslaw not coldslaw. I just... never looked at the menus to hard. Coldslaw makes sense its cold. Who is Cole???

ArchDragon99 , Shameel mukkath Report

Final score:

35points

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Hippopotamuses 5 months ago

Simple answer: The origin of the word is Dutch.

29points

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Sunny Day 5 months ago

I learned at age 58 that a lot of things I thought were "common knowledge" evidently aren't.

Justin Tyme 5 months ago

I went to the Grand Canyon and was disappointed to discover that it is just a huge hole in the ground.

When I went there it was gone. Full of fog.

2points

Salty_Sasquatch 5 months ago

I'm really starting to dislike the quizzes. The one above had 20 questions which is definitely too long. I prefer the voting quiz when I can find out if my opinion is shared by other people or not.

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