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There are lots of things in the world we have to look out for. The "Dumb Ways" song laid it out for us pretty clearly more than 10 years ago. Yet, the Internet seems to find new dangers we should be aware of every other week. This time, we’re featuring submissions from people about the times they messed around and found out. One person online asked: “What, due to experience, do you know not to [mess] with?” And people came prepared with all sorts of stories and practical wisdom, from never engaging in road rage and never bothering a sleeping person to taking good care of your eyes.

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#1

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again People, in general.

People. What a bunch of bastards.

aluaji , Andrea Piacquadio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Spoot
Spoot
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Humans are by far the worst animals on this planet ngl.

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#2

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Iguanas. This happened about 25 years ago on a rare cold South Florida morning. My dad (big guy, with a soft spot for animals) found a "frozen" one in our backyard, and decided to bring it inside (in a closed off room) to warm up so that our dogs didn't get to it while it was offline. As soon as that thing warmed up, it was like a bat out of hell! Teeth, nails, and tail whipping cut him up pretty good. Eventually got it out with a broom, and all my dad muttered was "ungrateful bastard" lol

EDIT:

Alright this comment is getting more traction than I anticipated! Yes, I am aware that iguanas are an invasive species in FL. I am not aware if 25 years ago, if they were deemed as big of a threat as they are now and/or if that was as common knowledge back then.


What I DO know is that my dad took it as an opportunity to instill fascination and curiosity in me as a young child. He was able to safely show me it's spines and talons, and explain that reptiles are cold-blooded and what that meant. Even more than the mini science lesson, he showed me compassion for living things. Especially as a young child, I think I would have walked away with a very different impression if he just killed it. Would that have been the right thing to do? Maybe. But I think the happy memory and lessons I learned that day were more important than a single iguana being let free.

danioof , Pixabay / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:
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#3

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Men who say all their exes are crazy.

duck_duck_goofs , Caner Kökçü / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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#4

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Intuition. If something feels wrong stop. It doesn't matter if it's stepping out onto a snow-covered slope, pulling up to a sketchy gas station, or putting too small of a piece of wood in a table router, listen when your brain tells you "This is a bad idea.".

kolalikoa , Christina / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:
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Lulu
Lulu
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But what if I have anxiety and my brain tells me EVERYTHING is a bad idea??

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#5

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Not finishing antibiotics. Just because you feel better doesn't mean you stop taking them.

Better-Ad5309 , Michelle Leman / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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#6

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Seatbelts.

Attended a friend’s funeral. He was riding the back seat and didn’t wear his seatbelt during a roadtrip, the driver was sleepy and hit a divider, the car spun out and he was flung out. He died during the ambulance ride, only 19 years old.

First thing I do when I get into any vehicle is to buckle up.

fxcked_that_for_you , freestocks.org / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:
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Marianne
Marianne
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And there is literally no reason not to do it. There might be a couple of people with phobias concerning restriction, but apart from that, it really shouldn't bother you.

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#7

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Fanatical born again Christians.

lemoncake3003 , RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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#8

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Badgers.

they may look friend shaped and may also respond to psspsspss but no touchy cos they scratchy bitey.

rainbowroobear , Leo Sam / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:
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#9

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Never challenge a goose.

ITreeFairy , Denis Linine / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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#10

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again The sea.

Aggravating-Pound598 , Ray Bilcliff / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:
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Gavin Johnson
Gavin Johnson
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But it’s ok to tickle it every now and again, just be prepared to swim away quickly ok?

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#11

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Not listening to medical advice of a professional I am a nurse and have seen many people have horrible lives or deaths because they thought they were smarter.

Unsichere-ziege-b , Laura James / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:
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Yvonne Dauwalder Balsiger
Yvonne Dauwalder Balsiger
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Forget those nasty vaccines, try a coffee enema with some essential oils during a waning moon just like they said on Facebook 🤡

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#12

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Food poisoning. If you've ever had it for real, your personal food safety standards will rise significantly.

Electric-Sheepskin , Life Of Pix / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:
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Lulu
Lulu
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband had food poisoning from old shrimp he found in the fridge. Did he learn anything? No. I STILL have to tell him he shouldn't eat certain things or should wash his hands after handling raw meat or respect expiration dates for some foods. I honestly don't know how he made it to adulthood.

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#13

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Narcissists.

PolyThrowaway524 , ZHANNA TIKHONOVA Tt / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Grape Walls of Ire
Grape Walls of Ire
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You know, just because a guy likes holding his jaw, it doesn't mean he's a narcissist. Besides, it's not like he's orange.

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#14

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again People in the middle of a road rage incident. It is amazing how a grown adult can absolutely lose their mind when inside a vehicle.

titsmuhgeee , Alina Rossoshanska / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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#15

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Take care of your eyes (wear eye pro, mind what you’re doing, change contacts on time etc). A few years ago I got a small piece of metal in my eye. This became infected. Navy ships are nasty.

The infection was misdiagnosed three times. After four days everything seemed ok. On day five I woke up with my eye basically rotting from a rare bacterial infection. I was fortunate enough to keep the eye so I appear unaffected but my vision was permanently damaged. Long exposure to sunlight causes migraines if I don’t wear sunglasses. I’ve had to learn to do a lot of things in different ways. All around a life changing event.

thefluffyparrot , Mikhail Nilov / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:
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Savahax
Savahax
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't take any risk with your eyes, or your "Gentlemans Sausage". -My father

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#16

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again If you're traveling never f**k with the locals. I've seen people pick fights with one of the locals and 10 of his buddies came out from every shop around them.

NaughtyNina23 , Jimmy Chan / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Guy-Incognito
Guy-Incognito
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe don't pick fights in general. See someone about your need to compensate for your tiny manhood.

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#17

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again * People who believe they have nothing to lose. That could be a late-stage addict or your average teenager.
* Anyone with cauliflower ears.

TheDadThatGrills , cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Tucker Cahooter
Tucker Cahooter
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm surprised BP didn't illustrate this one with an actual cauliflower

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#18

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Don’t fight. You never know who’s carrying a knife or a gun until it’s too late. Life is not a fight scene in the movies, it’s 10X worse.

AusTex2019 , Josh Hild / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Karma Black
Karma Black
Community Member
4 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even without a weapon, one bad punch can be lethal.

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#19

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Don’t f**k with someone sleeping, easy way to get beat up by the nicest person.

Interesting-Onion787 , cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Racing Tadpole
Racing Tadpole
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wake someone by shaking their foot..further away from any punching fists

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#20

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again People who cook, deliver or serve your food.

Tantressa , cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Syrah
Syrah
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel like this shouldn't be again, it should just be never.

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#21

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Payday loans.

Konaim , Karolina Kaboompics / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Jeremy James
Jeremy James
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When you only get paid once every two weeks because it saves your company on payroll processing and rent is due on the first of the month, this can be an easy trap to fall into.

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#22

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Construction sites.

They are one of the most dangerous places to be so you have to be paying attention all the time you are in site.

DrummerBob10 , PhotoMIX Company / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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#23

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Electricity.

Ill-Lu , Anete Lusina / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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LilliVB
LilliVB
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't want to sound condescending, but isn't it obvious? If you work with an electrical circuit, you should switch off the electricity. It's like, basic safety procedure, isn't it?

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#24

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Nature.

To many people think because they go camping and few times a year and shoot their gun from time to time that they can do whatever they want in the wild.

Nature only has one goal, to kill you and turn you into plant food. We spend millions of years to adapt and get away from nature. That doesn’t we somehow we have mastered nature or are immune to it. Respect it and take calculated risks when you’re out there by yourself.

unk214 , Luis del Río / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Gavin Johnson
Gavin Johnson
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nature isn’t even trying to kill you. Your death will just be the byproduct of nature doing what it does, it has no specific reason or need for you to die right now, your death is inevitable anyway, it’s not even focussed on you, you are insignificant and nature will wait, you get to choose how long you survive but remember one slip, one moment of thoughtlessness and guess what, nature will get you.

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#25

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Alcohol. I had my run of ten years drinking, had an epiphany that alcohol was killing me, and nearly five years later, those in my life who didn't quit drinking are starting to frequent the hospital.

takisokay , Mahrael Boutros / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Bob
Bob
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yup, alcohol is very effective at making you feel good, and feel less. It doesn't make you "forget" per say, it makes you disappear from yourself. Alcoholics aren't stupid, this solution IS good and effective. It just becomes the only one left. And that's the issue. That's why saying to people "alcohol/tobacco/drg is bad" usually doesn't work. Because it has an actual real good effect (especially if you develloped physical dependency). The best way out is to seek help (professional if possible), build habits and shape your environnement to make quitting bearable.

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#26

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Hydration.

Drink more water. Yes, you.

DashCat9 , Matteo Badini / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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#27

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Garage door springs.

Semi-Nerdy , Wenxin Dong / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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#28

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Swans during mating season. Think about a goose on steroids and three times bigger. They've been know to chase down jet skis and knock the driver into the water for getting to close to their nests.

Linux4ever_Leo , Yevgen Buzuk / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Marianne
Marianne
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't forget how huge swans are. If an angry swan is blocking my way and hissing at me, I will find a different way.

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#29

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again The thermostat at my dad's house.

FuzzyPedal , Erik Mclean Report

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devotedtodreams
devotedtodreams
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We never had a thermostat, but even so, Calvin & Hobbes taught me to never mess with one :D

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#30

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Cacti with fuzzy spines. Compared to the ones with big pointy spikes, these are the real terrors.

It took like a week for all the tiny little spines to get worked out of my skin.

Morbidhanson , Teona Swift / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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TheElderNom
TheElderNom
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cat would gently bite the clusters of spikes, then pull them off and drop them on the floor. They are not fun to pick from your feet.

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#31

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Gas station sushi. One impulsive night in college taught me that bathroom floors are cold and unwelcoming places for contemplation.

TemptingTwinkle , MART PRODUCTION / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Marianne
Marianne
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Except when you're in Japan. Every sushi everywhere in Japan is usually top quality and super fresh. People in Japan take their image and honor extremely important, so no one will sell you anything that they don't trust to be excellent quality.

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#32

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Stray tom cats. I had one hand my butt to me. Had to get rabies shots and everything.

Otherwise_Yam4094 , Aleksandr Nadyojin / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Did I say that out loud? (he/him)cis/het
Did I say that out loud? (he/him)cis/het
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or cats generally, really. I recently had to give ours a tablet using the hold it's mouth open then closed method. On a more positive note, my anticoagulants are working brilliantly.

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#33

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Bulls.

Don't f**k about with bulls. Even "relaxed" ones.

JeepersOhh , Brett Sayles / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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TheElderNom
TheElderNom
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or cows, they are more docile but they can still mess you up.

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#34

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Do not try to sit in some elderly person’s favourite seat. Do not try to change any table arrangements like placing the coffee pots differently than they have been used to for the last Thursday of every month for 20+ years. You will never hear the end of it for the rest of your sorry life. Just keep it as usual. Which can be hard if you’re new at your workplace.

EarthySofa , Andrea Piacquadio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Laserleader
Laserleader
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Apparently a statue of Mary was moved in my grandmother's garden after a big family visit, and somehow it was my mother's fault it was on the other side of the garden. Years later my grandmother would still remind everyone again and again about how the statue was moved.

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#35

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Mentally unstable people.

You think you're crazy? Try arguing, fighting, or self-defending against a mentally unstable person.

Make_Moneyyy , Demeter Attila / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Sue User
Sue User
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is adding to the myth that mentally unstable == violent. They are the victins if violence more than perpatrators

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#36

Trains. They have absolutely no opinion of you and even less regard.

I nearly witnessed the death of a half dozen people who f****d with a train.

In the town do the college I attended there was a train track that ran right thru downtown, and divided the bar scene. Well one night a train had decided to rest in the middle of downtown, and prevented drunk college kids from traveling to more bars to get more drunk. A bunch of people decided to cross underneath the parked train, and admittedly, I too was tempted.

While a group was crossing underneath the train suddenly lurched forward about 6ft. One guy hit his head was bleeding pretty good, but everyone else was unharmed. I thought I was about to witness people separated from 1/2 of their bodies.

Another time, as a kid, my buddy and I were putting pennys on railroad tracks to squish them. We decided to try it with a quarter, but when the train passed the quarter shot out and out a bullet-sized hole in the concrete structure behind us.

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V
V
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We just had an awful accident in Australia. Wind blew a double pram on to the tracks at a station. Dad jumped down and got one kid out, but the dad and other kid didn't make it in time before an express train was due. Heartbreaking.

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#37

Old people.

I saw a 65 year old on a cane Knock a 22 year old "fighter"...OUT. Not down...not over...and not use his cane.

Fighterboi was bullying a smaller teenager.

Crazy old man strength is real folks. Oldster may have trained but he still has the chops.

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FrogMan
FrogMan
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

65 is considered old? Uh, what’s 48 considered, asking for a friend….

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#38

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again As a homeowner that has had a long list of s**t to do for a very very long time.

I do not f**k around with plumbing or garage doors. No f*****g way. Nuh uh. Nope.

Bgrngod , David McElwee / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Zoey Bear
Zoey Bear
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Plumbing I fück with but garage doors, I wish to be alive to eat dinner that night.

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#39

Health.

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#40

Your workplace bosses.

It's very rare to have a boss that actually knows what he's doing, isn't insecure, and doesn't take his position as a place of power, so you'll most likely have bosses that are clueless, insecure and power hungry. Learn to respect their authority and do what you're told. If you're unsatisfied, leave.


If you confront your boss he'll make sure you regret it until the day you leave. It's not worth it.

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Javelina Poppers
Javelina Poppers
Community Member
4 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Had a boss that was always on a daily power trip and started yelling at me over something I had no part of so I turned and walked away. His next words were, "I ought to write you up or better yet I ought to fire you", my response was, "I'll save you the trouble, I QUIT". He had the cajones to call me the next day and ask for the password to my computer driven machine which I somehow forgot overnight.............that's a $5000 service call for the manufacturer to send out a tech unless they wanted a $300,000 boat anchor.

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#41

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Strangers. Flipped one off, he tracked me down and threatened to murder me.

Ill-Simple1706 , Bruno Silva / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Jeremy James
Jeremy James
Community Member
4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I once thwacked a truck with my umbrella handle for almost running me over in a protected crosswalk. He tried to chase me. It was worth it.

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#42

Mountainous roads during or after a blizzard. I’ve seen a few people just die from turning corners too fast and hitting oncoming traffic. Bridges freeze and traffic backs up for hours. Seen plenty cars spinning out on black ice.

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#43

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Recreational use of Benzodiazepines

Editing to provide context : I had a very rough 4 month patch in my early 20’s where I thought abusing xanax bars would be a better alternative than dealing with my life problems head on.

At the beginning I was taking 4-8mg a day just to sleep all day and avoid my problems/thoughts, by the final 4th month I was taking 16-24mg daily just to blackout and sleep all day. I remember nothing other than waking up & eating small meals + more xanax bars to fall back asleep every day, lost about 35 pounds during this period & had VERY intense withdrawals when I stopped cold turkey.

I still have rebound anxiety & body tremors 7 years later, I do not trust myself with benzodiazepines to this day & prefer to use beta blockers to help with the rebound anxiety nowadays.

swagdaddy5151 , Emma Filer / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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Superb Owl
Superb Owl
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4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have benozdiazepines and opioids for chronic insomnia and severe restless legs syndrome. I only take them when I absolutely have to, don't want to add an addiction on top of my sleeping problems.

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#44

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Significant others or friends who only seem to kind of like you.

OhMyGodBearIsDriving , Diana Titenko / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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#45

Don't f**k with others food. Stealing their food off their plate can result in getting stabbed with a fork (my brother learned this the hard way) and messing with their food like adding stuff that typically wasn't meant to be in it could result in time in a federal prison (a cousin did time for adding peanut powder to a person's meal as a joke only they were allergic to peanuts).

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Mia Black
Mia Black
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4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am a sharing person. If you ask, you probably may get some of my food but if you just take, I will be angry and lose respect for you

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#46

Sleeping Black Snakes: I was out mountain biking early one spring morning, and this enormous (in my memory it was 8 feet long and big around as a beer can) black snake was lying across the trail in a patch of sunlight. Being the savvy and experienced outdoorsman that I am, I knew he had probably just woken up, and was still sleepy.

So I picked up a long stick and gently nudged his tail to encourage him to move aside. He was not sleepy, no, not even a little bit; he whipped his massive and toothy head around so fast I never even saw him move. One second he was lying there, the next he was hissing in my face.

The only reason he didn't tear me up is his tail was so far away from his head that I was still out of reach after he reacted. I slowly walked away backwards, and he didn't pursue me. I took another trail and left him to reign over his place in the sun.

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#47

The taxman..

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Javelina Poppers
Javelina Poppers
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4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You pay taxes on money you earn, taxed on money you spend and taxed on things you own that you already paid taxes on with your already taxed money.

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#48

My little cousin Peyton (not his real name), age 12 next month. More like a nephew, really. Middle of three boys. The quiet one. The one with the deadpan sense of humor. Never mess with the quiet one.

Example: His older brother's friend decided to "borrow" Peyton's video game system and take it back to his house. The kid in question is two years older, at least a foot taller, and probably 20-30 pounds heavier than Peyton. When Peyton found out, he rode his bike over to the kid's house and, without a word, beat the ever loving s**t out of him and then took his game system back.

The line in the family is, "Peyton is not to be f****d with." Lol.

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Javelina Poppers
Javelina Poppers
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4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My older brother Ron would come home from school looking as neat and tidy as when he left that morning. My mother would get hysterical phone calls about how Ron beat the snot out of someone's poor son. Ron always said that "I don't start fights I just finish them".

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#49

Strep throat. Got it ten years ago and thought it was just part of a cold that would go away in a few days. It ruptured my appendix.

I’m severely immunocompromised and just got it four weeks ago. Couldn’t swallow or breathe without crying in pain so I got antibiotics but still felt scratchy for the next week so I figured it was just damage and needed repairing. Went back this week after once again couldn’t swallow or do anything without crying. It didn’t go away the first time and came back with a vengeance.

I’ve had strep for a month now and I can’t take my life saving meds because of antibiotics and am hoping this doesn’t turn to scarlet fever, rheumatic fever, or toxic shock syndrome. Because that’s a thing too.

TeslasAndKids Report

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PattyK
PattyK
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4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I doubt if the strep throat was the cause of your ruptured appendix. They were just coincidental.

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#50

35 People Share What They Will Never Mess With Again Cops.

Angry_Gorilla_74 , cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

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BoredPossum
BoredPossum
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4 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why would you mess with cops? Either they are bad eggs and you're in trouble or they are nice and then you have no reason to mess with them.

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#51

The Wu Tang Clan.

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