“Professional Incompetence”: 30 Things That Are More Common Than People Would Like To Think

Many things might seem uncommon at first glance, especially when there’s no one in your circle going through the same thing. But members of the ‘Ask Reddit’ community recently revealed that some occurrences or situations are way more common than one might think.

They started a discussion on the topic after one user asked them about such things that are more common than people realize, and in their answers, the netizens covered everything from amicable divorces to professional incompetence, and beyond. Scroll down to find more of their examples on the list below and see what other things might not be as rare as they seem.

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"Professional Incompetence": 30 Things That Are More Common Than People Would Like To Think Not having any friends when you're older. After you graduate college, especially if you move to a new city for a job, it's hard to maintain friendships. And it's definitely hard to get new friends once you're in the adult world working every day. Many people's only friend is their spouse. And if they aren't married many people just don't have any friends.

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Final score:

151points

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Anthony Nizza 8 months ago

I have none.

67points

Richi Weiss 8 months ago

I can feel that too. Not funny but it's the way it is...

16points

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Paint CHiPs 8 months ago

I think I was 35 when it first occurred to me that I had no friends. Exactly as OP says, I have a wife and kids, I have moved around a lot for work over the years, I was never great at keeping in touch with people anyway, and I don't have any hobbies or interests that force me into social environments. I remember just kind of waking up one day and realizing "Huh; I actually don't have a single friend. Not one. Weird." And it's not like I'm socially awkward or misanthropic or anything--I'm perfectly friend-LY. But the last time I had a friend group or any non-relative I might call socially was like 20 years ago. I think for adult men especially, it's just not something anyone ever talks about or warns of so it's easy to think that everybody by default has friends, that it's just the natural resting state. But no, like anything else, if you don't work at it it atrophies and goes away.

12points

featherytoad 8 months ago (edited)

Same. It's much harder to click with someone when you are older. I think when we are younger we are less inhibited which makes it easier to make friends.

6points

Chris Landrum 8 months ago

me neither

5points

Heather Menard 8 months ago

Neither do I. We can be eachothers friends

3points

Ava Babili 8 months ago

Neither do I....

3points

LAWLAWLAW 8 months ago

I have one but I keep ghosting them because I am so socially awkward

2points

Nikole 8 months ago

All of mine moved except for one. I didn’t realize this until my 10+ year relationship with my boyfriend ended… It’s quite lonely.

1point

SolitaryIntrovert 8 months ago

I had one good friend who passed a couple of years ago. I am not in the market for a new one, since I like my solitude.

1point

Antony Aston 8 months ago

me neither

1point

Sammie 19 8 months ago

I have one I rarely see as she moved away.

0points

Michelle Gosney 8 months ago

Seems a lot of folks have few or no friends in the comments . But we’re all part of the Bored Panda community, probably other social media groups too. Maybe in the wilder world we are isolated, but we belong here, because we are worthy. I hope the folks who need to hear that are reading this.

7points

clairebear 8 months ago

I don't have any. Just colleagues.

7points

Edward Treen 8 months ago

I have maybe three or four friends but rather more acquaintances. I don't see friends very often - maybe two or three times each year. I happily live alone (with my three cats) and lead a happy. fulfilling life serving my feline overlords.

5points

Steve Barnett 8 months ago

I'm autistic. Enough said.

3points

clairebear 8 months ago

Me too Steve, me too.

0points

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Sandy D 8 months ago

True. Having an anxiety disorder or 2 like me, makes making new friends virtually impossible

3points

DB 8 months ago

Just how I like it.

2points

BoredPossum 8 months ago

This is so sad!

2points

Ken Beattie 8 months ago

I've often thought there should be a "Friendr" app. Works like Tindr or Grindr and similar, just instead of looking for hookups it's literally just to find someone with similar tastes to hang out with. Put in your profile you like horror movies and drinking beer and people can go "Hey I like doing that too! Lets hang out."

1point

FABULOUS1 8 months ago

Sounds a bit sad when I say it out loud, but my wife is my best friend. The few friends that I have had over the years we no longer have any contact. Plus I work remotely so I dont see making new ones any time soon.

1point

Kevin J. Henning 8 months ago

Life gets complicated and people get weird as they age.

1point

Panda 8 months ago

Kids help here. Our family friends are our kid's classmates parents.

1point

Jay Son 8 months ago

My kid has no friends either lol

0points

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Debbie 8 months ago

It takes effort to maintain a friendship, and effort often also means time. Sometimes there just isn't enough time. That said, if you do want to try find people to hang out with (and move from aquantaince to friend to close friend) is learn new things. A new group, a new hobby, a sport... And be brave enough to take the step to ask people to do do things together. Not many do. Hardly anyone does actually, all to afraid of rejection. And yes, "rejection" happens because people have busy lives. Don't give up. I started a monthl boardgame night at work, joined a group sport thingy, try to be active locally, call out on facebook and in whatsappgroups for people to join me for concerts. I have friends, but it's not like I speak to them daily or weekly, and they are not that often available. A group of friends is harder to form. It isn't necessary to have friends though, if you are fine without friends, then that is ok. But if you want them, it takes effort and persistance.

0points

Misty M 8 months ago

I happily have two. My husband of 24 years (Met in 1995 and married in 2000) My brother. I don't need anyone else

0points

Liz Downing 8 months ago

Just me and my spouse.

0points

Joe McNuts 8 months ago

It takes effort to make/keep friends and people are lazy. Depending on where you live there probably dozens of ways to make friends.

0points

Squiffle Noses 8 months ago

I have one. Guess I am lucky.

0points

Scott Wilkins 8 months ago

Just my SO

0points

ispeak catanese 8 months ago

In my case, it's up and down. Right now I have a lot of friends, coworkers to eat out and text with, neighbors to chat with, 2 good friends and 4 long distance friends. It's the most I've ever had in my life. I've learned to accept the limitations and make an effort to connect in spite of my depression, introversion and laziness. It's done me well to push myself.

0points

A. Starhawk Hunt 8 months ago

Sadly, tru dat

0points

Dee Breezy 8 months ago (edited)

Only friend is definitely my husband. Its not from a lack of trying though, however I'm done trying. I get tired of doing all the work, going out of my way and never getting back the same energy.

0points

Griffy 8 months ago

I have one. Plus my dad. Both are elderly. God help me when they go.

0points

Shannimal 8 months ago

It's also more difficult to make friends when you don't have or want kids *sigh*

0points

Candid Panda 8 months ago

I moved to a new city with my fiancé and a few years later we broke up. My social life never recovered.

0points

geezeronthehill 8 months ago

You reach my age, many of them have just died off.

0points

Sarah 8 months ago

I try to maintain friendships but I quickly realize I am the only one putting in the energy and I stop trying, and then never hear from the friend again. So glad I married my best friend.

0points

Angeldust McQuade 8 months ago

Yep

0points

BatPhace 8 months ago

I have a few good ones I struggle to keep in touch with. I love them dearly, but if I don't see them often I don't always think to message or contact them more than maybe once a month? I feel bad, nothing changes for me because of the distance, but I feel like they feel like I don't care even though I do!

0points

DeeDee M 8 months ago

That’s something I’ve never understood about adulthood that is so overblown on TV/movies/social media. Apparently I’m supposed to have a T-swift level squad of aging mean-girls who I just can’t live without, and a booming social life where we all go out looking hot and carefree. Um…🧐 Sure, I’ll find time between kids, spouse, finishing my education, working, keeping house, kids afterschool b******t, the list goes on…

0points

The Chronic Insomniac 8 months ago

My spouse died in 2022 and now I have no friends.

0points

MotherRobinson 8 months ago

Im in this club also. My husband is my best friend also.

0points

Whitefox 8 months ago

If you want to make friends develop your hobbies and interests. Join groups related to them and see what happens. :)

0points

Suck it Trebek 8 months ago

This is me. ☹

0points

vintage_one 8 months ago

This.

0points

Moosy Girl 8 months ago

I think it depends on our definition of a friend.

0points

Flora Porter 8 months ago

True. I'm down to one close friend a hundred miles away and a few by occasional text or email who I rarely see. Lots of acquaintances and neighbours I can ask for help if I need to, but only one person who really knows me. When you're older, friendships you do make, like at work, don't seem to stick as easily.

0points

Marjorie Macrae 8 months ago

The older you get the worse it is.

0points

keyboardtek 8 months ago

At 69 years old, the ability to listen to trivial small talk is no longer a satisfying social activity. It seems a waste of what little time I have left.

0points

jdtimid123 8 months ago

That's oddly comforting, knowing it's normal and not necessarily just a me thing. That said, if you want to make friends, you have to make time for it and put yourself out there. I started in jujitsu last year partly for the training, but also to socialize more, and while I wouldn't necessarily consider us close, I have made a few connections, and it has definitely been good for my mental health.

0points

Trisec Tebeakesse 8 months ago

Get out. I'm a Freemason, a Scout Leader, and have friends from my son's soccer and church. If you don't seek anyone, they won't find you.

0points

Jesha 8 months ago

Then it doesn't apply to you. She said it was normal, not that it was impossible to do or anything, just that lots of people can't or won't. She also said 'many people' not 'all people'. Please consider reading comprehension in your future endeavors!

1point

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Happy_Pandalover 8 months ago

It‘s never too late to make new friends. Unless you do not want any friends.

0points

Donna Peluda 8 months ago

acquittances many, friends few.

0points

JuniorCJ82 8 months ago

Thanks for the reminder.

0points

Steve Hall 8 months ago

So...is this a bad thing?

0points

Mark Karol-Chik 8 months ago

My very best friends are 1400 miles away.

0points

kansasmagic 8 months ago

Yep, and what's worse: this seems "normal", perhaps especially for men. Last time I made a friend was twenty years ago. I have made a few "friendly acquaintances" since, but no one I'm particularly close to; and I don't even hang out with those acquaintances. Yeah, it's life, I know, but I mean these people won't even carve out a couple hours a *year* on my behalf.

0points

“Professional Incompetence”: 30 Things That Are More Common Than People Would Like To Think

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