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30 Therapists Share Their “I Know I’m Not Supposed To Judge, But Holy Cow” Moments
Being a therapist means being exposed to a wide range of personality types. Part of their job is to examine these cases objectively, but they’re only human, too. And because of how absurd certain situations can get, some cannot help but pass judgment.
These responses to a recent Reddit thread may provide further insight into what these professionals deal with from time to time. The stories tackled disturbing parenting practices, questionable romantic relationships, and people’s life choices that may make you shake your head in disbelief or second-hand shame.
If you’re a mental health professional, your work and services are greatly appreciated. Feel free to share your own experiences in the comment boxes below.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
I evaluated a child and had to testify in family court. During the court session I learned that the mother had "rented" her oldest daughter to her friends when the daughter was 15-17. The mother told the daughter she "had to do it" otherwise her siblings would be homeless and hungry. Mother used most of the money for d***s. Father pays rents and brings grocery every week because he knew mother didn't have money. Custody was 50/50 when this was happening.
The judge did not terminate the mother's parental rights and mother got supervised weekend visits. The judge said it wasn't clear the mother's intention was for her friends to r**e the daughter so she wasn't going to terminate the mother's parental rights. She went on about the importance of children having a mother in their lives. Till this day, I judge both the mother and the judge.
Strings 8 months ago
I absolutely HATE the mantra of "children need their mother/father in their lives!". If the parent is causing them damage, get the kids OUT
Emily Phillips 8 months ago
My ex was physically and emotionally a*****e to my son and me. I finally mustered enough guts to leave when my son was 6. My ex will say that to me repeatedly "a child needs their father". And so when i repeat that they need one that's not a*****e, he starts yelling and calling me names. I havent allowed my son to see him in a year because of the abuse. But he goes around saying im just being petty and bitter.
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Tobias Reaper 8 months ago
if the father did this he would never see her again and rightly so but somehow its ok if the mother did it in the eyes of the judge at least
Phobrek 8 months ago
Judge decided a s*x trafficked child needed her s*x trafficker. Judge should be in prison.
Earonn - 8 months ago
And again: yes, the mother is pure s**t: but not ONE of her friends got the offer and informed the police and CPS. At best, they weren't interested. At worst, they happily r***d a child. Show me the "good men" in that scenario!! (Yeah, Dad was good. I'm talking about the "r**e my daughter for money")
Tim Richards 8 months ago
This is exactly the opposite. That child did not NEED a mother like this in her life.
Maples Dad 8 months ago
'Children need their mothers' is why so many women dodge deserved prison sentences. Seriously, equality STILL has a long way to go in some parts of life.
Vinnie 8 months ago (edited)
That kind of mother definitely deserves a prison sentence. One of my in-laws is a prosecutor who has a good track record in putting away s*x offenders. They needed a break after a mother said of her p*do boyfriend, "Other than that, he was good to my daughter."
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RELATED:
#2
I once had a man who was attending family therapy with his 3 children, admit that his last child (a girl) was an “accident we tried to abort - we only wanted boys”. The sad thing is, the girl didn’t even look bothered; she had clearly heard it all before. They were attending family therapy as the girl was actively s**cidal and they “didn’t know why”.
Rick Seiden 8 months ago
My third was not planned. We wanted one of each or three, whichever came first. We got one of each, so we were done. Then we had my third. She knows she wasn't planned, but she also knows she was not a mistake. She's a surprise, because a surprise is something you didn't know you wanted until you got it. I love her with all my heart, and she knows it.
Mere Cat 7 months ago
That sounds like my experience, mine is from the surprise child's perspective. :) Mom's Pill failed, and there I come! Mom knew instantly that after all, she did want another baby, and my dad believes I was meant to be born in our family, there is no escaping fate.
Load More Replies... Maples Dad 8 months ago (edited)
Same thing happened to me, mother only wanted girls 'because they're easier to raise' so I was sent off to my grandmother's. Turned out to be the best thing that could have happened as I learned so much (she was a Họlocaust survivor.) Even when she passed away, an absolutely amazingly lovely family offered to adopt me and my mother said no despite the fact I wasn't in her care.
Child of the Stars 8 months ago
I can't imagine telling my kids that they were accidents. Surprises, sure, as both were unplanned. But accidents? Never.
KLL 8 months ago
This! If you don't want a girl don't have a girl. If you can't accept having a girl don't have kids. Period.
June 8 months ago
If you don't want a girl don't have kids. Period. (same goes about disability, gender, sexuality and so on. Most people shouldn't breed).
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#3
A lovely teen girl was brought to her first appointment with me by her dad. Her mom had, as diplomatically as he could spell it out to me, recently up and left the family to go live some selfish new age lifestyle with a “reiki healer.” Just abandoned him with two kids to raise solo, and he was doing his best for them.
Therapy was the daughter’s idea; she had been having troubling intrusive thoughts lately about school shootings, like…how to plan and execute one, and these thoughts were upsetting to her and she did not want to act on them. I can still picture how scared and sad she looked telling me this. I just wanted to wrap her in my arms, but instead I offered so much praise and encouragement for her seeking help and trusting me with this information. She also met most of the diagnostic criteria for onset of a schizo-affective disorder.
We pulled dad into session, caught him up, explained the most urgent part of the plan: he was going to take her for a full eval with a great psychiatrist colleague of mine who understood the situation and was going to get her in stat. Daughter seemed relieved, dad seemed relieved, we scheduled time to talk soon.
Well, mom woke up from whatever festival ditch she had passed out in to angrily call my office and flip out on me.
How DARE I?!
Am I trying to poison her child with pharmaceuticals?!
Did I EVEN draw her blood and check her vitamin levels?!
Do I want a bad google review or worse yet, a warrant issued for my arrest?!
Do I even understand herbal supplements?!
I need to stop now because my head hurts remembering all of this.
LA Murphy 8 months ago
Dumb t**t will probably try to heal her with crystals.
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StarCrossedFriday 8 months ago
Words cannot express how impressed I am this girl opened up about her intrusive thoughts. Kudos to the dad for taking her seriously and getting her help.
Jennifer Drake 8 months ago
Listen, I’m a liberal, pot smoking hippie. Biggest one I know. I also LOVE my antidepressants. I’d be no one without them, literally. Pseudoscience is the biggest detractor to people like myself, who believes that cannabis, herbs, AND modern medication can change lives. My heart hopes this sweet child is doing well now.
Child of the Stars 8 months ago
Even reasonable vegans will advocate for vaccines which contain eggs or other animal products when alternatives aren't available!
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Nuku Nyara 8 months ago
My MIL decided to join a "reiki" cult and divorce my FIL after 42 years of marriage. She also disowned almost all her level-headed children as well as grandchildren. The only time she has called was when she found out my FIL passed and hasn't called since.
Tom De Paul 8 months ago
Have you notice that journalists rarely do a deep dive into the parents of school (and theater) shooters?
somnomania (she/her, queer) 8 months ago
i'm a big supporter of many herbal/vitamin supplements, but they don't cure anything, they just help with my overall pain levels and sleep. turmeric, tart cherry, vitamin c, l-theanine, and melatonin are all crucial to my health management.
#4
As an intern, I had a couple where the woman was chastising the man because his mother is in an "a**sive cult that tortures children" (mormon). The guy had ex-communicated and doesn't interact with his parents and hasn't for years. She thought this is a good reason to not let him parent his children, like he's not allowed to go out on his own with them because his parents are Mormon. She says she's worried that he will let his mother kidnap her kids and was asking me for support for her beliefs. She was also just calling him names, it was weird.
The whole time he's like "... I don't even talk to my parents and I love my kids".
In the end she said "I guess I'm just a b***h, aren't I?", looking at me as if to get my reaction and I accidentally blurted out "your words, not mine". Woops.
Tom De Paul 8 months ago
I an a retired LCSW child, adolescent, and family therapist. I practiced within 40 miles of the Utah state line for over a year. That's a whole nother country.
Lyone Fein 8 months ago
When people change, sometimes others refuse to give them credit for it. These are toxic manipulators.
Annabelle 8 months ago
This. That's one of the biggest things I realized about many former, significant family, friend, and romantic relationships-the more I changed as a person, the more "problems" I had in my relationships.
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Osito Panda 8 months ago
A*****E! The word is A*****E, please stop this nonsense censorship...
Judi Stull 8 months ago
What part of being a Mormon equals torturing a child? That’s ridiculously far-fetched and not close to being true.
#5
Had a patient in a group ask for advice because she was feeling pressured into s*x she really didn't want to have. A "friend" had traveled 2 hours to see her and gotten a hotel room for them. The group heard her out, asked questions, and the consensus was something to the effect of "yeah, you probably owe it to him."
It remains one of the only times I've dropped any effort at experiential/socratic questioning and just flatly told people "absolutely not."
KnightOwl 8 months ago
Wtf? I don't understand how anyone could ever come to that conclusion. Noone EVER OWES anyone s*x!
Huddo's sister 8 months ago
Unfortunately used to be pretty common way of thinking. We did a quiz in high school (early 2000s) where there were scenarios and you had to decide if each was r**e or not, and all were. I was surprised how many people argued about them, like if your partner has agreed to s*x once, she has to agree to it any time after.
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Tim Richards 8 months ago
You never "owe" anyone s*x. Sorry, but any guy who thinks that way is a straight-up jerk.
Luke Branwen 8 months ago
Both the group and her partner deserve some "percussive persuasion" if you know what I mean.
Cpt. Christan "Panda Bombero" 8 months ago
OWE IT TO HIM?!?! WITELFH?! Oh, I would have needed Anger Management Counseling, after that. Because some people would have gotten throat slapped.
Rich Black 8 months ago
"I'm coming in from out of state. I've got a hotel room for us. No expectations . . . "
#6
Used to work in an acute child psych ward. Saw a lot of angry preteen/elementary (think 8-12 yo) mostly boys, and most often than not, parents treated the kid really harshly and were *shocked* this only made the kid worse. Also worked in an area where they did NOT want to hear their “old school” parenting could be a problem.
Had one dad who said “well ya I will spank him (11yo son) when he gets angry, look I know everyone nowadays doesn’t like that but I was spanked my whole life and I turned out FINE.” It took my entire ability to bite my tongue and not to say “….sir, you just got out of prison 3 months ago after serving 5 years for a violent felony.”.
KnightOwl 8 months ago
I find this attitude so infuriating. 'I turned out fine' erm no, no you didn't! You think abusing your child is OK, that is most definitely not fine!
LakotaWolf (she/her) 8 months ago
During my childhood, my mom would tell me all about her abus!ve childhood. She would tell me, in detail, how horrible it was when her father beat her or hit her with a belt. She would then beat me or hit me with whatever she happened to have in her hands at the time. She absolutely did not see the irony of telling her child "I had a miserable abus!ve childhood" and then basically not realizing (or caring) "hey wait, I am abus!ng my child and also inflicting the same miserable abus!ve childhood on her."
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Charles McChristy 8 months ago
I spent a few months in jail in my 20s, and I can confirm that this is the common thought of an inmate. It's always someone else's fault, they never accept the blame for anything. It used to drive me nuts and is one of the resaons I've tried so hard to never reoffend.
Lyone Fein 8 months ago
It is easier to see a splinter in someone else’s eye than a log in your own.
Louise Clarke 8 months ago
My dad would spank me, it was awful. My first memory of him is him spanking me, that's a difficult thing to get past and tainted my relationship with him
June 8 months ago
I was babysitting my bf brother, he was 8yo at the time and his mom was a nurse so she was out 6-6 and it was clear that I had to do all the parenting job including homeworks and she was there just for the fun / nice part. Shane had a terrible period, he was messing with the nicest people. I was nice with him, but he knew that he doesn't get to mess with me. He tried at some point. We were in the bus, I looked at him straight in the eyes and told him that I would spank him bare butt in the middle of the bus. I didn't but like 10 minutes later he was terrible again walking in the street, so I forcefully sat him down on the curb and told him the harsh truth : if he kept being a nightmare we (other friends and I) would not babysit him anymore. He cried his eyes out because he wanted to keep us so bad. Anyway, something was wrong with the parenting and he was filling a lack with us. That's just sad 🙁
Definitely a Human 8 months ago
"I keep kicking this angry dog in the face and I just can't understand why it's trying bite me!"
Rich Black 8 months ago
a guy in prison for a violent felony was allowed to resume parenting his kid? that makes sense . . .
Tom De Paul 8 months ago
Why wouldn't you say that? It's a perfectly good redirection as well as challenging a thinking error. Retired LCSW here.
#7
I worked with a teenager who was struggling with eating disorders, to the point she’d been hospitalized for organ damage at one point a few months before. I went to dinner with the girl and her mother. Her mom spent the entire dinner counting the individual pieces of rice she (the mom) was eating so she could accurately count the calories she consumed. I asked the mom to stop and she just stared at me and asked why she would do that because she had to watch her figure. I wonder where the 15 year old got her eating disorder from…
Edit: for those of you wondering why I was eating with the kid and the mom, the teen was in patient and the mom was visiting. I was working as a psych tech, and the kid wasn’t allowed to eat un-observed since I had to document her food intake to make sure she was eating sufficiently as a part of her treatment plan, so I joined her and her mom in the cafeteria for the meal. I definitely passed along the info about the mom’s eating habits for the therapist to follow up with in family therapy.
SkyyCaramba 8 months ago
ewwwwwwwwww, I sometimes count the pieces of whatever food I'm eating, but that's because I like counting things
Majestic Narwhal 8 months ago
No lie. Worked in an eating disorder wing of an institution and everything had to be charted and they had to be frisked to make sure that they were not carrying food from their tray to throw away later. Sad
Tom De Paul 8 months ago
There are treatment modalities (i.e. MST) where the therapist shares a meal with the client and family.
Mi So 8 months ago
Not odd when you read to the end and see the client was in-patient for an eating disorder & not permitted to eat un-observed, for treatment purposes. It’s really quite common in this type of treatment situation.
Load More Replies... #8
I work in prison. Anything to do with child s*x offenses or animal a**se pisses me off.
Kristin 8 months ago
Here in colorado in my home town, a story came out in the newspaper about a guy who in his words "happily" abused kids (4) and over (10) counts of B********y. Makes my stomach turn. Also said it made him happy and wouldn't want to get help as he wouldn't give something up that made him genuinely happy!!!
Panda McPandaface 8 months ago
Because therapists have to conceal any opinions they have when with patients.
Load More Replies... #9
I was a therapist pretty briefly and moved on to another profession, but I’ll never forget one client in particular during my internship.
My internship was at a site that primarily did court mandated therapy sessions for people who were going through the criminal justice system. This client was in the system because he had m*lested his girlfriend‘s 12-year-old daughter while the mother was in the bed as they slept one night.
As a therapist, they drive it into you pretty hard during your training that we’re all basically good as human beings and I believe that with very few exceptions but this man was an exception. He felt no remorse or guilt for what he had done and what’s worse is tried to justify his actions.
It was clear in speaking with him that this wasn’t the first time something like this had happened not just with this child, but with others. Sitting with him for an hour at a time was difficult and he stopped coming after only a few sessions.
The email I sent to his parole officer stating that he had missed his court mandated sessions was the only one I sent gladly in my time there. I’m sure this man had a terrible childhood himself and perhaps over several years could get to a better place, but in my view, the only place for him was in a jail cell for the time being.
Lila Allen 8 months ago
They can't. We'd like to pretend otherwise and a very very very small number manage not to reoffend, but by and large this is not the case.
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Rachel Pelz 8 months ago
Once read an interview with a psychiatrist who works in therapy and prevention with "real" pedps, people who feel sexually attracted exclusively to children. Yes, of course there are cases of faking progress in therapy. On the other hand, there are men who trully do not want to commit sExual Abuse and have to accept that in otder to do so, they will never be able to have s*x. The statement that struck me was: picture inviting your new neighbor over for barbecue, offering him a beer and his reply is: thank you, but I'm a dry alcoholic. Then picture asking your new neighbor to watch your kid(s) while you have to run an unexpected errand, and the reply is: honestly, that is not a good idea as I feel sexually attracted to kids and know that it is a risk factor for me to be alone with kids. Of course seXual abuse of children is horrible, but as a society, I believe we have to think beyond "let's lock them all up for lifetime" and counseling/therapy for those who honestly want to "change".
Roxy222uk 8 months ago
We always have to have hope that a person can be redeemed.
Load More Replies... Rich Black 8 months ago
the problem here is that therapists are all being trained under the theory that "all people are basically good human beings". there is no statistical evidence for this at all.
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 8 months ago (edited)
Sorry, but no. Humans are not mostly good - most barely even qualify as 'ok'
Scott Rackley 8 months ago
As someone who's lived quite a while in this world, what your training drove into you is b******t. I wouldn't give the average person a 65% to even be decent, much less "good"
#10
Worked with a former therapist. Most memorable she had was a guy with serious emotional issues. His hands were all scarred up and always had fresh scabs on the knuckles when he came by. He said when he got mad, he would go to his shed and punch the “soft” concrete he had or do the same to a dumpster when he was at work. In his words, he did this to avoid doing it to his girlfriend and kids like his dad to him.
LilliVB 8 months ago
I agree on some level. He, at least, was trying. Surely he had anger issues and probably other problems as well, but at least he tried to come up with something to avoid hurting people near him. And the fact that he sought professional help shows that he had enough awareness of his shortcomings and willingness to work to overcome them
Load More Replies... Huddo's sister 8 months ago
At least he was reaching out for help. Hopefully he got better strategies to cope as well as get to the root of the problem.
Betsy S 8 months ago (edited)
Not satisfying enough when the anger inside you is a raging monster that needs to feel pain to feel recognized and satiated. Not enough resistance and feedback to the physical body. It may be similar to cutting. In order to relieve an emotional pain, you cause a physical one that can be seen and focused on. For him it wasn't cutting. It was abusing his fists to cause that damage and pain.
Load More Replies... #11
I had a woman once bring in her child for scholastic issues. The child clearly had Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. I asked her gently if she consumed alcohol while pregnant, which she confirmed. When I told her that is likely the cause of the scholastic issues, she said "I don't feel bad about it".
FAS in general gives me a case of the WTFs.
KnightOwl 8 months ago (edited)
Wtf. She doesn't regret literally damaging her child's brain? I hope her kids were taken away from her, she clearly doesn't care about them. I have a nephew with FOS and even his parents, who are all around awful people, showed a lot of regret when they discovered the damage they had done. This mum is clearly a selfish a**hole who put her enjoyment of having a few drinks over her kid's wellbeing and quality of life. It's really not that hard to stop consuming alcohol for 9 months unless you have a serious drinking problem.
SweetCheesySpaghetti 8 months ago
I have a cousin with FAS. His mom denied any alcohol or d**g use during her pregnancy, despite blood tests and what-not proving it. The kid suffered all growing up with this woman. Once he was officially an adult he left her (with his sister), and as far as i know never had a relationship with her again (she has since passed).
Load More Replies... Huddo's sister 8 months ago
I know a girl with FAS who needs so many different therapies that her foster parents can't afford to have her as a permanent foster child (affectively adoption) despite wanting to.
Rachel Pelz 8 months ago
There is too little awareness about FAS and not much knowledge about the exact way it happens. Like, maybe really not much alcohol but at a very volatile stage of pregnancy? Which is why no alcohol at all during pregnancy is important. On the other hand, it might help for diagnosis and therapy if mothers are honest about alcohol consumtion.
June 8 months ago
Childhood friend #1 has 3 kids, all 3 have learning disabilities and potentially neurodeveloppemental conditions (I'm AuDHD and they all send ADHD vibes big time). Friend's siblings #2, #3, #4 have all strong ND traits. #1 told me she consumed alcohol while pregnant, but she never correlated the facts. Maybe I'm wrong, but I did. 🤷♀️
Ace 8 months ago
Something doesn't ring true here, diagnosis of FAS takes time and needs the history. No way would a doctor be able to say, on first presentation, "this child clearly has Foetal Alcohol Syndrome".
JMil 8 months ago
While I am not categorically disagreeing with your assessment, FAS can shows externally in "unique" facial features. I knew a victim and their facial features look just like the images that come up if you Google it (and... he wasn't so bright).
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Gracie Mae 8 months ago
I had a cousin who smoked while pregnant with her 2nd child (on purpose)--because her 1st one was so big, she wanted to keep the weight of the 2nd one down...
Rich Black 8 months ago
her obstetrician should be interviewed. possible discussion about how closely he's monitoring his patients?
#12
A man in substance a**se group was telling a story and casually mentioned:
"Yeah I grew up in the country.. we were always outside as kids, building forts, playing tag, drowning the stray cats down the well..."
It took the group a minute to absorb the info... and honestly, I just let them have at him.
LilliVB 8 months ago
Isn't cruelty towards animals during childhood/adolescence a telling signs of psychopathic disorder?
Lady Eowyn 8 months ago
It has been shown that children who abuse animals are likely to abuse people.
Load More Replies... Nikole 8 months ago
All animals! (Although I realize this was specifically about cats.)
Load More Replies... Susan Teter 8 months ago (edited)
Blanket party in the parking lot!!! Throw a blanket on him and have at him!!! At least he could fight back.
Kit Black 8 months ago
No offense, but the point of a blanket party is that they can't fight back... you don't make it easy for the blanket to come off...
Load More Replies... Rich Black 8 months ago
next person says "I grew up in the city. we were always stealing copper pipe and wire, standing lookout for the dealers, and giving beat downs to the kids who wandered in from the other neighborhood . . . "
#13
I heard concerning information about the way a child was being treated (not my patient, but a sibling of the patient that I had never met), called CPS and reported it that day, and the following day found out the child had died. It was traumatizing, and 6 years later I still think about it a lot.
Atom Bohr 8 months ago
That's awful. It's awful for the child, but for OOP, too. They did everything right, it was just too late
Kiss Army 8 months ago
Help me out... What is an OOP? OP is Original Poster, correct? What is the extra O?
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Misha Writer 8 months ago
I worked for someone whose spouse was a police officer in a big US city. Think Atlanta, Chicago, Dallas. The police officer responded to a domestic abuse call, a young child in the home. The child was not removed, and a week or so later (not sure of the time frame honestly, but it was not long in the grand scheme of things but likely felt like an eternity to that child), the police responded again to the same home. The child was unresponsive, and died due to the injuries from the abuse. It's not just therapists affected by these kinds of cases, but all who come into contact with the victims, and the people who love those who have to carry the burden of what they have seen and have to carry with them.
Rachel Pelz 8 months ago
So somebody know before telling OP and if they had told CPS as well as OP, maybe this kid would still be alive...
Roxy222uk 8 months ago
I read it as a child making a disclosure to the therapist as they were a sibling of the child that died. But even as an adult that kind of disclosure can take a lot of courage, and you may not know who you can safely tell.
Load More Replies... #14
NA therapist, but a PO. I worked exclusively with s*x offenders for a long time. Lots of incest and bes******y stories come out during testing. I had a client who had a sexual relationship with their twin, which was…shocking. Other clients engaged in long term sexual relationships with their mothers - I don’t really think there’s much hope for someone who is involved in that kind of a dynamic. I don’t really judge - after 20 years in the business I’ve seen some version of it all by now. I just feel sad for these folks, and their victims.
Tyranamar Seuss 8 months ago
I’ve heard too many stories about men who were sexually abused by their mothers. Or sons who r***d their mothers. You’d think it’d be more rare than it is.
Rich Black 8 months ago
in the old days, problems like this were resolved by stoning, beheading, or burning at the stake.
#15
I'm not a therapist, but I did volunteer for a year for a s*****e prevention line. I once had a white male client who was essentially seeking help for his sadness relating to POC/queer people.
He was a white supremacist who wasn't seeking help to y'know, not be a neon*zi anymore. He was sad/disturbed at the state of the world not fitting his racist worldview. Dude tapdanced all around it, but said essentially "I'm upset/sad because not everyone is straight and white" .
Tom De Paul 8 months ago
Remember, he's the one that walked in seeking treatment. He could have chosen to run for President.
Load More Replies... StarCrossedFriday 8 months ago
It’s not like world ever was only populated by white, straight people…? What do you care? If we were all the same, the world would be a boring, boring place.
Not-a-Clue (she/her) 8 months ago
I said that to someone once and then immediately had a horrible dystopian vision of a world where everyone was me. It was truly awful.
Load More Replies... Jennifer Drake 8 months ago
Well, I mean, this ONE time, couldn’t it be a tip line? Like Butterball at Thanksgiving.
Vinnie 8 months ago (edited)
...and not everyone is willing to cater to your c**p. Years back I was friends with someone who was very sweet and pleasant to me. Then she mentioned she was moving out of our neighbourhood, was glad she wouldn't be around POC, and asked me to help her with packing. I never showed up and we lost each other's numbers.
#16
One of my now adult clients told me about the “child fight clubs” their dad would run. Whoever won got to eat that night.
Sheena Leversedge Wood 8 months ago
I hope this one isn't true, just posted for attention, but the sad thing is, it's not shocking that things like that happen. sad. but not shocking
#17
I’m an addictions therapist so I’ve seen people from all walks of life in all sorts of conditions, find it hard to judge anyone for anything as a result.
BUT
I do judge when I’ve got a doctor/lawyer/wealthy individual in my chair, acting like their a*******n is somehow less damaging because of their income, profession, or social status. That their “bad” behavior somehow gets a pass. Respectably, no.
StarCrossedFriday 8 months ago (edited)
Er…so ‘addictions’ is fine but ‘a*******n’ must be censured? Edit: apparently so, it happened in my comment too 😅
Parmeisan 8 months ago
Yeah, of course, one is bad but multiple cancel out! Right?
Load More Replies... Jennifer Drake 8 months ago
These people are the most maddening. It becomes almost comical, because they don’t realize that’s their life in a year. Addictions steal EVERYTHING.
Donna Sempek 8 months ago
It is sometimes difficult to read with so many ridiculous censored words.
Millie Brown 7 months ago
Yessss, and the 1,000 abbreviations and I can't figure out the meaning!!!!
Load More Replies... Rich Black 8 months ago
I'm a r****r and I'm tired of random Panda censorship of perfectly normal w***ds.
#18
I had a client report she was happier than ever in her new relationship. She had a stable partner who would help provide for her son. And the best thing was there were no awkward introductions because her son already knew him! He’s her half brother.
Earonn - 8 months ago
In the end, you know what - I don't care. They love each other? He loves the child? Stable, positive relationship? Good, let them have it. Why should some genes ruin this? We're not living in tiny groups anymore, where incest will k**l the tribe in a few generations. Hand them a package of condoms and send them on their merry way.
Tropical Tarot 8 months ago
I don't like it but it's their business. As long as they don't have biological children together. it would be a little less icky if they weren't raised together.
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Tropical Tarot 8 months ago
Chris and Cathy Dollenganger. I know them too well. We were reading that stuff at 11. My grandmother got me Petals on the Wind for Christmas that year. She just thought it was a horror novel. The theatrical movie was stupid but the ones they did on lifetime were pretty good.
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Snazzy Smurf 8 months ago
Good ole Charles II, who had every genetic problem his family stick carried.
Load More Replies... Rianna Lewis 6 months ago
I honestly wouldn’t be able to keep a straight face during these sessions.. my eyes would literally pop out of my head and and I wouldn’t be able to keep my mouth shut about the importance of their decisions and not fake it out and be happy for them 😬
#19
When I was an intern in my MSW program I had a 19 year old client tell me she was pregnant, didn't know who the dad was but had narrowed it down to 3 guys, was NOT going to stop smoking m**h and had no intention of attending her obgyn appointments. However, she was going to keep the baby to let her mom raise it, like she did with her other children.
Orange Frosting 8 months ago
I doubt someone like that would care enough to get sterilized.
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KnightOwl 8 months ago
Sounds like my brothers ex, 5 kids to 5 different dads.(aged between 7 and 15) All 5 were born with Foetal alcohol syndrome, addicted to either m*th or cr@ck. Her first child only lived for a few days, the following 3 survived and have been raised by her elderly mother, all 3 have autism, ADHD, and varying degrees of brain damage. My nephew is her 5th child, he also has Autism, severe ADHD and brain damage, he was born with FAS and addicted to cr@ck my parents have raised him. She apparently wants to keep having kids until she's allowed to keep one despite being told that will never happen. (Her last 4 kids were taken away within hrs of their births and she has no contact with any of them)
BrownEyedGrrl 8 months ago
They don't care as long as THEY don't have to raise them.
Load More Replies... Gracie Mae 8 months ago
if ever there was a perfect case for mandated birth control/sterilization...and NO, I am not in favor of it, but holy sh!t,...and I've known a few like her
lisa_l_ross58 8 months ago
Need a social worker to see her daily a force her to take birth control pills
Tom De Paul 8 months ago
Yeah, that's not how that works. Although my first year internship in my MSSW program was at an RTC for at-risk adolescent girls. Having the Norplant inserted was a prerequisite for admission.
Load More Replies... #20
I had a week where I had multiple male clients who said they couldn’t understand why their wives were upset after they cheated on them/hired s*x workers. It was more so all of those cases together where I was like they can’t ALL be this dumb and insensitive…right?
Magenta Blu 8 months ago
Of course then can. I always wonder is there IS sensate people... Because it seems empathy and Respect is just a myth
#21
I had a 11 year old patient proudly show me the tattoo his uncle gave him. I definitely judged that uncle in my mind.
Michael Largey 8 months ago
Even a 14-year-old should recognize boundaries.
Load More Replies... #22
A kid came into inpatient hospital after burning down the house with his family still inside, and when asked if he meant to k**l them, all he said with a blank look was, "They got out, didn't they?".
Tyranamar Seuss 8 months ago
I’m here. I’m here to judge. Burning people is not OK. Even if you’re mentally ill or being abused. Most mentally ill or abused persons don’t make other people’s lives a living hell.
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Uncle Panda 8 months ago
We didn't know why but the house across from grandma's house was one of those 'dark houses' on the street. The youngest, maybe 8 years old, set the house on fire and in the aftermath, the family was split up and all sent away. We never knew what happened afterwards, either.
#23
I worked with a man who expressed support of a violent reinstatement of chattel slavery.
zububonsai 8 months ago (edited)
How to therapy THAT lack of humanity, basic decency and general ethical behaviour?
Meaghan Stewart 8 months ago
I wouldn’t even know where to begin other than making him try it out himself as the chattel first.
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somnomania (she/her, queer) 8 months ago
reinstate him into that sort of lifestyle and see how he likes it then
Tom De Paul 8 months ago
I'm not sure this is an issue calling for therapy. Hand him a copy of the Constitution, highlighting the 13, 14, and 15th amendments. Give him a copy of an American history textbook and have him read about the Civil War. Next!
#24
For me, it was more of a series of moments- I can't help but to feel some kind of way when a parent brings me their teenager who is s******l and/or depressed, and clearly does not care, and the kid knows they don't care. I can have intellectual empathy that something happened to the parent for them to behave that way, but I really struggle when parents bring their teens to me with the intention of "fixing the kid" rather than providing support and guidance for the family. It crushes my soul when I see a teen who is so used to being cast aside that they don't bat an eye when the parent throws a fit because the teen needs to be assessed for safety/s**cidality and it was an inconvenience to the parent, and it's REALLY HARD to withhold judgment in those situations.
Another holy sh*t moment is when one of my clients openly admitted to being racist, homophobic, transphobic, sexist, etc., and he felt good about the fact that he could claim those labels. That was only one of the reasons I had to transfer him, but it sent a chill down my spine when he looked me in the eye, knowing I am a queer therapist, and proceeded to tell me all of the ways in which he hated my community. So ya, there have definitely been some interesting moments.
SouthernGal 8 months ago
I will never understand how parents can expect a therapist to “fix” their child and believe it will work if the home environment remains the same.
Just Another Karen 8 months ago
exactly! they don't really want the responsibility. it's easier if they let other people do it. when something goes wrong, they'll blame anyone but themselves
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LakotaWolf (she/her) 8 months ago
My dad had to sneak me to therapy when I was a teenager because I was clinically depressed and suic!dal. My mother doesn't "believe" mental illness is real, thinks you can just "stop" being depressed if you "want to", and thinks that suic!dal people "just want attention". I had already been making plans (and stealing pills) to end myself since I was 12-13. My father was a wonderful man and actually got me the help I needed. I was on antidepressants for a few years (again, kept hidden from my mother.) My father saved my life. I absolutely would have found a way to k!ll myself if he hadn't gotten me to therapy regularly. Unfortunately most of my issues were caused by my mother's abúse - which unfortunately my father was not strong enough of a person to stop. She abúsed him physically, verbally, and mentally as well. He saved me, but never saved himself. He had an accident when I was 18, and unfortunately, because of that, I never escaped my mother. However, I'm still alive :)
SouthernGal 8 months ago
Your father sounds wonderful. Hope you will be able to overcome the negative impact of your mother.
Load More Replies... Tom De Paul 8 months ago (edited)
Find out if you can be trained in MST - Multi-systemic Therapy. It's a university-based peer reviewed in-home family therapy modality. There's research that having 1 session of MST as a teen leads to spending fewer days in jail as an adult compared with any other therapy or no therapy.
#25
The dad that told me I had 2.5 sessions to "fix" his daughter.
Teenage client who got a giant tattoo of a band she had never heard of.
An extremely a*****e (like I got physically sick reading the reports of what she did to her children) mother who had her children taken by CPS, complaining about the food at the foster home not being fresh enough.
#26
A client once proudly told me they brush their teeth once a week because 'they don’t want to wear them out and i was likeeee... oh s**t 🤣.
LinkTheHylian 8 months ago
At least this one is pretty tame. And overbrushing is a thing, but once a week isn't the way to prevent that.
Michael Largey 8 months ago
Well, then be really serious about not wearing them out and only eat once a week.
#27
There was a car accident, Mother was drunk driving and ended up in a ditch, mom's friend and 8 year old had mild injuries and were admitted to ER for check ups. Medical information for the child didn't match up to what the mother was saying, for some reason a blood test was done and they found out mom wasn't mom. Mom's friend was the actual mother but gave away the kid at a year old due to being tired of being a parent (her words not mine).
It was one of those wtf moments.
Earonn - 8 months ago
Hey, the bio Mom made the right decision. Real Mom acted s****y in drunk driving, but if otherwise the child is well cared fore, what's the issue? (Assuming that all legal issues are sorted out)
Sazzypants 8 months ago
Bio mom was not the drunk driver, bio mum was the friend.
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Uncle Panda 8 months ago
How does *that* phone call go? "Hey, Mary, what are you doing for the next 18-28 years? I gotta little favor to ask..."
Amanda the Panda 8 months ago
Is it usual to do a DNA test when treating patients with “mild injuries “?
RedHairedDragon 8 months ago
Doesn't have to be DNA, could be blood group or some other indicator. If someone claims to be the parent of a child and it doesn't add up, then I hope they investigate it.
Load More Replies... #28
Sitting in a couples session. First session ever with them. And they are openly discussing how they have 10 children between them (from previous relationships) and regularly physically fight each other.
Both described raging so hard they would black out and not remember fights.
Unfortunately after they were unwilling to make a pledge that they would no longer use violence I eventually had to end our therapeutic relationship.
Julia H 8 months ago
My parents would yell and hit. Later my ex would yell and hit. It's little wonder why yelling triggers me. Over 40 years later, yelling makes me cry
somnomania (she/her, queer) 8 months ago
i feel it, and i support you. i grew up with my dad yelling all the time, not really in a verbally a*****e way, just yelling and swearing a lot. it certainly wasn't directed at me, so my mom took the brunt of these "arguments", and even now at almost 38 years old my instinct when i hear yelling is to see what's going on. before i was in therapy i'd just shut down, so i guess the therapy helped.
Load More Replies... #29
We can judge, in fact we have to judge harmful from helpful to be effective at this job. We also have to do no harm and provide the greatest beneficence to our clients.
With that said…I’ve worked with child a**sers and domestic violence perpetrators. On a number of occasions I’ve worked with m**ders and even a few folk involved in dog fighting. The thing that always struck me was not the sociopaths or how many former cops I saw but how easy a few changes in your life and/or brain can lead to someone being just as susceptible to pretty terrible impulses.
Mike Barrette 8 months ago
You shouldn't abuse the system with overeager censoring of everyday words such as murder, incest and r**e. They are in every standard dictionary and accepted as part of the English language. Panda's Puritanical Censorship board is doing a disservice to its community by treating everyone like sheltered children. Get a grip, you church ladies.
RS 8 months ago
They do it for the ad money, not because they worry for the children.
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Charles McChristy 8 months ago
I disagree. Those impulses were always there. They were just awakened, but they always had the potential to turn out this way.
#30
A client left their pet rabbit on their balcony and knowingly let it starve to death. Didn’t feel bad about it at all.
Understanding the various facets of human behavior is essential for therapists, much like recognizing everyday examples of societal issues. One key area of concern, similar to spotting systematic biases in retail environments, is how societal structures influence individual actions.
For more insights on this, refer to examples of everyday systematic biases in retail settings.
#31
Once had a patient fake a seizure for about 30 minutes. When EMTs arrived and checked her, they said “wow, that must be tiring. You could just stop.”
StarCrossedFriday 8 months ago (edited)
I was in town one night dropping off my friend, and as we chatted we heard a man yell for help - he was with a young girl who suddenly fell unconscious in the street. We ran over, and while my friend phoned emergency services I did first aid on the girl. When the ambulance got there, they went ‘Oh, Janine, not again’ - it turned out she was faking being unconscious, and did this quite often. But in the meantime, the guy who was with her had vanished. I always wondered what happened to that girl, and who the hell that guy was. I hope she’s okay.
#32
All the couples coming in for marital therapy as a result of deciding to become swingers. WTF did you think was going to happen to your relationship?
#33
A woman we'll call Joe who regularly complained of her relationship with her daughter. Her daughter had been taken from her when she was a child (approx 8 years) because Joe wasn't able to parent properly. Joe's driving ambition in life was to get custody of her daughter back but everyone (including her daughter) were conspiring to prevent that from happening.
It turns out Joe's daughter was 21. You can't get custody of a 21 year old, but Joe's fixation is what had driven her daughter away. Imagine stalking your own child trying to get custody of them when they're an adult. Because her daughter was 21 I didn't have to worry about any 'duty to warn' statutes which is good, because that one would have been murky as hell.
Binny Tutera 8 months ago
When parents think their children belong to them and are their “ property”.
Michael Largey 8 months ago
"No, I can't help you get custody of your daughter, but I'd be delighted to assist her to obtain a restraining order against you."
#34
When I was an intern, I met with a father who was having a sexual relationship with his teenage son. The father showed no remorse and accused the son of seducing him because his shorts were too short.
Upstaged75 8 months ago
And in prison I hope he got treated the same way by other inmates.
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#35
I started doing therapy with grandma and her 5yo grandson who she had custody of. She was concerned that he was waking up several times at night screaming. And he kept putting PBJ sandwiches in the VCR and destroying them. Found out she was he great-great Grandmother at 60yo. When I suggested she put the VCR in her room so he couldn't have access to it she said it was his VCR in his room. (She had replaced it 3 times in the previous 6 months). When I asked what kind of shows he watched on the VCR she said, Jason, Michael Myers, and Freddie Kruger. No s**t the kid is waking up at night scared and couldn't sleep!!!
Worked with another grandmother who complained that her grand daughter (13) was dressing too grown and inappropriate and she didn't like it. When I asked they girl what she thought about what her grandmother said her response was..."If she don't like the clothes I wear why she keep buying em for me? I didn't even ask for them. She just keeps bringing stuff home for me when she goes shopping.".
#36
I was an intern working with veterans. One of them was a s*x offender and was given to me (male) since he was super harrassy with the female social workers. He boasted about how he was wrongfully imprisoned because the two girls he r***d were lucky they got to experience s*x for the first time with an experienced man as opposed to a young boy.
Strings 8 months ago
The weird mental gymnastics that child abusers go through will always boggle my mind
JK 8 months ago
Believe it or not, it is not mental gymnastics. It is natural thinking for them, which is why they have such a high recidivism rate if not in both therapy and under strict correctional supervision. FTR: I've studied s*x offenders (risk, behavior, supervision strategies) extensively at the same time my mother was doing mandated counseling for them (in another state) and it made for some interesting conversations. It's not a subject I much like to talk about because it drove me to the brink.
Load More Replies... #37
When a client told me about her grandmother who used to "use her mouth to clean her son's p***s" and check under her skirt to see if she already had pubes or not...
StarCrossedFriday 8 months ago
Either possibility is beyond disturbing, but whose mouth are we talking about here?
#38
I had a dad call me and yell at me for 20 mins because I told his son that he had to take responsibility for himself and his actions.
His son was 16.
Another, I had a middle school kid come in with, what I thought to be his grandfather, actually be his dad. His dad said the mom had run off and wasn’t in the picture. Fast forward 3 months later a very young Eastern European woman comes in wanting to talk to me about her son. When I started to put the pieces together, something seemed…off.
She was a mail ordered bride & admitted to it. The son then confirmed “yeah I know my dad ordered her”.
Wild times.
#39
When I was in my clinical internship shadowing, a client said he was getting off on e**culating into a cup at work and filling it up with water from the communal Brita filter and drinking it around his female colleagues. This poor fellow was horribly sexually a**sed as a child and had several issues with sexual deviancy we discussed, but that one made me think HR HELLO PLEASE STOP THIS MAN.
Shane S 8 months ago
I’m not following on this one. He was drinking his own special sauce? That’s weird but not harming anyone else. To be clear, if I’m misreading and others were consuming, then that’s SA. Hands down.
Atom Bohr 8 months ago
Even if he was the one drinking it, it's still inappropriate. That's a sexual act for him and he's involving others without their consent
Load More Replies... #40
Mom admitted she didn’t love her adult kids. The following week she wondered why her kids were “screwed up” and were “so unlikable”.
Unkeptwoman 8 months ago
Same, Mom commented at the dinner table that she wished she hadn't had me or my brother. But the kids from her second marriage, they could stay.
#41
I work as a mental health counselor (I’m licensed as a marriage & family therapist) at a middle school (ages 11-14), I never judge any of the kids actions but some of these parents though. I have had kids literally tell me they’re s**cidal and then I have to call their parent who is effectively annoyed that they have to take their kid to get assessed. I also had a kid in the past who’s parent was about to move across country for some woman they met on the internet and knew for 2 months! Some scary stuff.
#42
I had a preteen client whose guardian kept requesting progress notes to see how they’ve “been doing”. It’s against clinic policy for clients and parents/guardians to have access to the notes; they’re allowed to have access to everything else though. The client was “very defiant” to everyone but was a wonderful kid throughout their treatment with me. When I met both with the guardian and parent, who both insisted on knowing everything about the kid, everything started making sense. Once the parent requested to switch therapists only because I declined their request to the notes, I knew how unhealthy the family dynamics were. I felt bad for the kid because they were opening up more about the family dynamics and how they impacted them; we had a good therapeutic relationship.
Unkeptwoman 8 months ago
My mother did this to me. I was 16, 17, in therapy. When I called the doctors office 15 years later for my records, they told me my own mother had taken them before I turned 18. Yep.
#43
My very first intake session ever as an intern was someone telling me they had been hooking up with their cousin since they were kids 🙃 It was quite the introduction to being a therapist! Haha.
#44
One man complained about being turned down for jobs that he was eminently suitable for. He had the biggest ego, thought he was perfect. He had a caution on his record for child a**se. His 13 yr old daughter was biting her nails and spitting the bits out. So he r**ed her on the knuckles . . . With a rolling pin.
"It's wasn't a big rolling pin, though".
#45
I had this client tell me they were afraid to move forward in their relationship because they thought their partner might become a secret vampire. They were worried that one day their partner would literally start sucking blood. It took everything in me not to burst out laughing. The things people come up with when they're feeling stressed. I totally get it, anxiety can make your brain go wild. I helped them sort through it, and they ended up realizing they were just projecting fears from an old horror movie. Still, that was one of those did I just hear that right moment for me.
#46
I’ve seen and heard a lot as a therapist. However, my holy s**t moments never come from what my clients say or do. It’s from what their families say/do. I have had two clients that were victims of factitious disorder imposed on another, better known as Münchausen by proxy syndrome. Those mothers surprised me repeatedly. The lengths they would go to keep their child “sick” and to try to convince medical professionals that their child was sick was so extreme. The most insane part is they fully believed the delusion despite numerous professionals stating their child was not sick.
Lara Verne 8 months ago
There was a case few years ago. Woman repeatedly brought her 6yo daughter to ER. Kid had sores all over her body. Treatment did not help and sores were getting worse. Turned out mother purposefully scratched kid until she bled and then rubbed dog s**t in scratches...
Upstaged75 8 months ago
There's a recent one I saw where a kid got taken away because the mom was injecting feces in to her 2 year old's IV. They banned her from the hospital to prove she was the one making him sick.
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Debby Keir 8 months ago
Actually, medically it's a 'factitious disorder'. *Factitious disorder is a mental health condition where individuals intentionally feign, exaggerate, or self-induce illness or injury to gain attention and sympathy, often referred to as Munchausen syndrome. *
Load More Replies... #47
Had a mother in family therapy with her two sons, say how she had paid for a pr**titute for the 16 year old and would do the same for the youngest when he got older because she wanted them "to learn how to do it properly".
#48
Mine is way milder than everyone else's, but when someone brings their child to me and they can't tell me the child's date of birth. It gets me every time. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW?
"Disembodied voice" 8 months ago
I hesitate when asked by date of birth because it always seems to catch me off guard, but I always remember!
Kit Black 8 months ago
Nah, some of us just have terrible memories - it takes me a long pause to remember the birth date of just about any of my immediate family members. Or where my car keys are. Or my phone. My kids joke that if I ever develop alzheimer's, we'll never know, because I won't act much different
LakotaWolf (she/her) 8 months ago
Yep! XD I could tell you the date of birth for each one of my seven pets. Kohl's is the only one that's woggy - it's a birthdate that I "chose" because I found her in a parking lot, but my vet pegged her age at around 7 months judging by her teeth, and it was December, so I chose May 5th for her birthday. XD All the others are from rescues/shelters/etc. and I know their exact birth dates! XD I don't believe in astrology per se, but something that always amuses the heck out of me is to occasionally read the horoscope for one of my pets and then "adapt" it so it makes sense for a dog/cat XD
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 8 months ago
Father or mother? Father - inexcusable, but possible. But Mom? Weren't you there at the time?
#49
A woman was so desperate for male validation that she allowed her then-boyfriend to install a camera in her teenage daughter's bathroom.
She was the sweetest lady, you would never guess. And she actually had a decent upbringing with positive familial relationships, just her dad worked a lot to support them and wasn't present.
Delicate Fcuking Flower 8 months ago
I'm sorry, I need to call out the b.s. of 'Dad worked a lot and wasn't present'. My "father" was out of my life by the time I was 3 and was very much not present but you don't see me doing something fúcking sick like that. Gtfo with this fúckery.
RedHairedDragon 8 months ago
You must be doing something else weird. What is it? Pineapple on pizza? Milk before cereal? Or, worst of all, you don't return the shopping cart!? /S
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#50
We get some wild consult requests from time to time, like people who fetishize the profession and non-consensually involve us in their kink via email/phone.
Bi.Felicia 8 months ago (edited)
Apparently some people that fetishize therapists would request a consultation visit and would involve these mental health professionals, in whatever their kink was, via email/phone without the consent of said professionals.
Load More Replies... #51
The guy who decided to take a marathon p**s while I’m trying to have a phone conversation about his kids diagnoses. And no porcelain. Only water.
Sweet baby Jesus my brother in Christ: I’m willing to wait for two minutes if you gotta drain it!
#52
I had a client admit that they knowingly infected someone with HIV because they themselves were miserable and dealing with active d**g a***ction at the time, and they wanted someone else to be as as unhappy as they were.
Edit: This is and always has been a hotly debated topic in the healthcare world, for what it’s worth. To clear some things up: No, I cannot call the cops just because my client does something illegal (and this is not an action that was always considered illegal or is considered illegal everywhere, btw!). It has to be something that is actively causing harm, or my client has to have active intent or a plan to cause harm. Whether or not you believe knowingly infecting someone falls within those standards is up to your personal beliefs and the laws and code of ethics of your particular state. And no, I cannot just ignore my career’s code of ethics in the name of doing what I feel is right just because I find a client’s actions abhorrent, or based on my personal interpretation of the code.
BlackestDawn 8 months ago
How the heck is intentionally infecting someone else with a disease (even if it's something like the flue) not actively causing harm? Just because it's manageable and not visible doesn't mean it's not causing harm.
Donna Peluda 8 months ago
I think they mean that it has to be on going. Or an eminent threat. Not for something that has already happened.
Load More Replies... zububonsai 8 months ago
That's ... baffling. I NEED to inform police etc when I'm aware of any of my clients being mistreated, I just can't wrap my head around the fact that it would be illegal anywhere to inform police etc if my client harmed someone else. // Well, he DID intently harm another being? At least the victim should be made aware who's been the cause for that because of, you know, compensation (at least for the HIV treatment)?
#53
My ex was a therapist and she told me about a patient who kept sleeping with a guy, who'd tell her to get the f**k out the next morning. She was in love with him, but he was openly just using her for s*x. Like he told her that to her face.
This situation happened for over a year. The patient refused to address the situation with him, and despite her claiming to never speak to him again, she'd go out of her way to bump into him and sleep with him around 2-3 times a month.
My ex said she did some research on if she could put a restraining order between the two of them.
#54
It wasn’t necessarily that it was that bad but completely caught me off guard. I was in a role where I did groups with people who worked together and I also saw them individually. They all knew (through each other and the program they were a part of).
After working with them for almost a year and heading into my final sessions with them, one of them told me that their married coworker (who was also my client) had confessed they were in love with them, wanted to leave their spouse, and wanted me to do a joint session with them. My eyes went wide because it was so unexpected. The married client had never given me any indication of those feelings. And I knew I was terminating with them both shortly.
I didn’t do the joint session with them. And I learned then to have a much better poker face.
#55
Nothing shocks me after 30 years in the field, so I never think "holy s**t." However, the most depressing thing I come across from time to time is the female patient who submits to an a**sive relationship in the "kink" community.
Kit Black 8 months ago (edited)
The quote marks around the word "kink" scream that this is not the right therapist for anyone who actually enjoys B D S M. Are some of those relationships a*****e? Absolutely - and many gathering places for this kind of activity *ban* those people. But not everyone doing things like this is being ~abused~. And you can be into B**M and still need therapy for other things.
Explore more of these tags
What do you think ?
DaisyBee 8 months ago
Yeah, these were rough. They’re anonymous with no identifying features so it slides past the ethical policies radar for these things but some of these therapists sound a little too upbeat about what they were describing…
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Pink kitty 8 months ago
I don't ever want to read about animal ab use! Especially on BP. Please include a warning so I can skip the article!
Dog Mom to Zoe 8 months ago
No, just no. No more of these please. Bring back fun thrift store finds.
Nona Jaynes 8 months ago
Having worked for a hella long time in mental health, I'm amazed there aren't more fatalities by MH professionals. We're expected to be there for everyone regardless of circumstance, but no one is there for us.
Tom De Paul 8 months ago
In my MSSW program it was STRONGLY suggested that we have our own therapist. I worked with adolescent and adult s*x offenders and kids who killed. You can bet I had my own therapist!
Load More Replies... Donna Peluda 8 months ago (edited)
Not a therapist but I remember a kid in my class, M15 who's father would take him to professional lady's of the night if he got good grades. The mother was fine with it. He wasn't the brightest of students but did study hard. To me it was seriously dysfunctional. And yes he also a 2 daughters.
somnomania (she/her, queer) 8 months ago
BP, the censorship has to stop, half the words that get censored are hard to figure out even with context! if you don't want to have content about those things, get your staff on board with, i don't know, not doing posts on those topics?
DaisyBee 8 months ago
Yeah, these were rough. They’re anonymous with no identifying features so it slides past the ethical policies radar for these things but some of these therapists sound a little too upbeat about what they were describing…
Load More Replies... Pink kitty 8 months ago
I don't ever want to read about animal ab use! Especially on BP. Please include a warning so I can skip the article!
Dog Mom to Zoe 8 months ago
No, just no. No more of these please. Bring back fun thrift store finds.
Nona Jaynes 8 months ago
Having worked for a hella long time in mental health, I'm amazed there aren't more fatalities by MH professionals. We're expected to be there for everyone regardless of circumstance, but no one is there for us.
Tom De Paul 8 months ago
In my MSSW program it was STRONGLY suggested that we have our own therapist. I worked with adolescent and adult s*x offenders and kids who killed. You can bet I had my own therapist!
Load More Replies... Donna Peluda 8 months ago (edited)
Not a therapist but I remember a kid in my class, M15 who's father would take him to professional lady's of the night if he got good grades. The mother was fine with it. He wasn't the brightest of students but did study hard. To me it was seriously dysfunctional. And yes he also a 2 daughters.
somnomania (she/her, queer) 8 months ago
BP, the censorship has to stop, half the words that get censored are hard to figure out even with context! if you don't want to have content about those things, get your staff on board with, i don't know, not doing posts on those topics?
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