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The Most Uncomfortable Moments When A Family Member Has Said Something Inappropriate or Inconsiderate: 50 Stories Shared By Our Community
To have a loving and caring family is a great blessing. However, even the most amazing home can have flaws that might be hurting.
Having blood ties doesn't mean that one is the same or similar to another. In some cases, a friend might be a closer person than the rest of the family. It all comes to the values and the way one thinks. With that in mind, I asked our pandas about a time when they felt uncomfortable because of something their family member said. Sadly or not, a lot of people had something to share. Scroll down to read the answers!
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I wouldn't necessarily call it "uncomfortable" but here goes: It was at my father's 85th birthday party and his likewise elderly sister/my aunt -who I had not seen in many years- tells me, "I'm surprised you're not in jail". I didn't skip a beat. "I'm surprised you're not dead". She avoided me the rest of the day...
If you're going to judge be prepared to be judged. This lady seems to believe she can say what she wants and get away with it because she's older, family or not, she get exactly what she dished out
Lesson: never start something if you’re not prepared to finish, LOL. 🤣
Some old people think they can anything they want to anybody just because most people are raised to respect their elders
It was more of a smaller gathering (bc of covid).
One of my family members told me I would never make it to heaven if I kept being gay. Me, being the idiot I am, stood up and yelled, "Praise Satan, then" and stormed off.
Everyone went SILENT
I hadn't seen my brother for at least 15+ years due to his travel and spending time in Europe. He had returned to the states and lived a couple hours away but still no real contact. Then, mom got sick. So, I drove up to get him and then up to my mom's. Now, I had gone from being 15 to 30+ since I last saw him and I had pursued a career in which I needed to be in good shape, so I worked out a lot. Once mom got home from the hospital, we all got together and it was then that he announced to everyone that he thought I looked like Arnold Schwartzenegger in drag. My mom popped up and commented, 'yeah, and she rides a motorcycle, too'. He just glared at me and that was when I told him that I also rolled my own tampons and kickstarted my vibrator. I thought mom was going to pop her stitches and my dad, a very quiet man, choked on his tea. My brother never said another word about me.
I was told I needed to get tips on doing my makeup. I was at my husband's funeral.
Years ago I was starting to get gray hair. My youngest brother was going prematurely bald. At one family gathering he made some comment about my gray hair. I replied "Better gray than gone!" He looked stunned and everyone else laughed. He never commented again about my hair.
You can always die your hair. You'll need a sharpie to remediate a bald spot.
My mom wanted me to take a succulent cutting from the garden of the airbnb where I was staying. I said no. She kept at at it. I said I'd ask the host. My mom said "what? why?? no!!!" and "I didn't raise you to ask permission!" I was slightly shocked and then thought for a second... it's true. She didn't, but somehow I know the difference between right and wrong anyway. Luckily, I don't do what my mom tells me to do.
Thanksgiving. I was ten. First Thanksgiving with my step family. Walked into the kitchen to hear my dad say that my stepsister was the perfect child but I was a total disappointment. I started crying. He slapped me and said “what did you expect me to do, lie?” Everyone went off and started dinner as if nothing had happened. I was left standing by myself. I hate Thanksgiving. And my father.
Saw my great uncle for the first time in years, first thing he says to me is "wow, you've grown! In many ways..." * Looks at my chest*.
Wtf Uncle Jeff, not cool bro
My grandmother: "Nice boys don't like fat girls, Mija," and then she got upset when I wouldn't eat the huge plate of food she served me. I was 9 or 10.
When I was 17, we were preparing to have a regular dinner, with my grandma coming over as an extra guest.
The table was set, main course needed more time to finish cooking, and I was in the living room watching Cartoon Network as it didn't require a lot of attention and besides I like cartoons of all kind.
My grandma arrived and passed through the living room where she saw me watching tv. She stittered, loooed at me shocked and said " You
..still watch kid stuff?". I didn't bother explaining that lots of cartoons nowadays have subtle queues to relate for a mature audience as well, so I just replied "Uh, yeah, what of it?".
Later during dinner, my grandma would address my father with a concerned face and would say " You should take your son to see a psychiatrist." ( my father froze mid-sip and gazed at her questioningly ) " I caught him watching children's stuff on TV. This isn't right I believe he might be memtally undeveloped. I still want to have great-grandchildren!".
I was right next to her, contemplating how not to explode right there and then.
35 years old now. With a 9 month old baby boy, engaged. Still watching Avatar, Family Guy and whatever the hell I want, probably will watch cartoons till I die.
It was my very first art exhibition and I invited all of my family.. at the end of the show we all gathered outside to chat and in front of everyone, my dad walked up to me and handed me 5$ saying: here, have an allowance, because no one will buy these paintings!
My ex-MIL referring to the local shop owner who was an Asian man: "We don't like those sort of people here". This was on Walney Island, Barrow in Furness, Cumbria. Said ex-MIL was also probably one of the most boring people in existence in addition to being racist, having no interests, never read any books, just trashy magazines, never watched any films or listened to music, knew nothing about history or current affairs but full of negative opinions about others, while claiming to be a Christian and having the audacity to tell me I'll go to hell. The shop owner, btw, was always pleasant, friendly, helpful and courteous.
sounds like the shop owner would have been a better person to have as a relative than that b***
My grandmas raised me saying things like "No man will ever love you if you don't..." (have long hair, dress like a lady, learn how to cook...). It hurt me a lot but especially subconsciously. I really grew up believing that the idea of me dating was ridiculous.
I was raised by my grandmother. She used to say that no one with a working brain will ever love me because I was so "rebellious". So when I got a partner, she always says what a blessing it is, him not being intelligent enough to realize the fact of me being the mess I am, and I should thank all heavens for him being "dumb enough to be with you".
I'm very very grateful for him being the amazing and loving partner he is, but I keep hearing my grandmother's voice inside my thoughts. Also she passed away like 20 or so years ago. I never went to the graveyard.
"If you don't want kids you just haven't found the right guy yet!" My boyfriend was right by my side
Wow! You got fat! - my aunt on the day of my dad's funeral.
Every time I see my family, a few people comment on how I “need to eat more” or “you are too skinny”. I absolutely hate when people say that because I am very insecure about my body. (Also first post lol)
Uncle asked me why my sweater was dirty. Said I should have dressed nicer. We had no way to wash clothes, had no food a lot of the time, and no new clothes. Everything was hand me downs. Parents spent clothing allotments from welfare on themselves. Rest of the family cared so little and/or were so oblivious to their black sheep son and his wife's children ... when we went into foster care, none of them, all well off, would take us in. Another uncle called us insects.
I'm sorry...I hope you and your siblings are all doing better now.
When I was six I had drawn a picture for my Auntie and when I gave it to her she said, "uh... ah..no." then threw it in the bin in front of me.
You could never pass as a boy, darling.
Said by my mother to young trans me still trying to figure things out. Jokes on her I get "misgendered" every single day by people who don't even know me so I'm obviously doing something right.
When I was thirteen, my mother scolded me (in front of a table full of people) for “flirting” with an adult male. I was mortified, especially as I had just laughed at one of the man’s jokes.
Unfortunately she might have noticed the man flirting with you which you didn't notice yourself at only 13?
Not at a family gathering, but I once had overheard my parents complaining about me and wishing that I was never born. It hurt a lot, and because I wasn’t supposed to hear their conversation I have to pretend to be oblivious and still act like I care for them.
IDK how old you are, but when you get out from under your parents' roof, remember you do not owe them anything. And there are lots of places where you can find support from others who come from abusiva and neglectful home. You are not alone. Your life matters. You matter.
I hadn't seen my dad in a couple of years, due to distance. I went to my little brother's wedding. The very first thing dad said to me, loud enough for everyone to hear, was, "WOW! You got fat!" Of course, everyone had to turn around to see whom he was talking to.
First thing it if my dads mouth every time he sees me is about my weight. So frustrating!
At a family reunion on my mother's side, my father was repeatedly asked why I (younger daughter) didn't have any children, after all, my sister (3 years older) was already married and has two wonderful children. He got so annoyed about it that he announced that I was a lesbian. The family avoided me for the rest of the meeting.
I don't understand why people just don't leave childless people alone!
Had an in-law try to pick a physical fight with me at a funeral because I removed him from Facebook.
TLDR version: I was told by my stepmother that I ruined our family Christmas, simply by being there.
Long version: I had a... troubled childhood, to say the least, too much to really go into, and honestly, I've blocked lots of it out and don't remember many details. I was extremely depressed, suicidal at times, and was violently acting out. My stepmother was the target of a lot of my distress, even though she wasn't necessarily the cause of it. My dad, and her, I guess, tried to help me as best as they could, but it got to the point where they didn't know what else to do, and sent me to a therapeutic boarding school. Part of the school's program involved home visits at specified times, and mine happened to line up with Christmas. When I got home, my stepmother was saying things along the lines of "it was so calm and quiet when you were gone, I was actually happy." I was trying to let things go, not make trouble, and repair the damage I'd done. Christmas morning, when we were all gathered around the tree, she looked me dead in the eyes and said "I hate that you're here. Just... you being here has ruined Christmas."
2 things, both said by in-laws. 1- at a restaurant to waitress, “that’s our last grandkid. No more bcuz we can’t afford them.” We’ve never asked them for anything for the kids. And made me want to get prego just to show her! 2- estate sale for great granny passing, diff ppl walking through the house to buy stuff. Lil old ladies coming through, saw 1 put a trinket in her purse w/o paying. I let it go, wasn’t worth it. A young black guy came in looking for angels for his mom. He was a hard working kid, I knew he was good and had a good heart. FIL followed him all around. FIL and MIL both said at diff times, “those are the ones you have to watch.” I was so disgusted! That’s when I saw their true selves. I stay away and keep my kids away from them as much as possible.
After I admitted I'd been raped, my Mother stated "You deserved everything that happened to you. You're no daughter of mine, you're disgusting really".
Needless to say, I no longer have a family.
Dammit! My heart breaks for anyone who has had a parent react like this to anything at all, but ESPECIALLY rape. What a sh*tty, cold-hearted response. They lost you because they didn't deserve you. I hope you find love, peace, and healing.
My grandmother when I was maybe 11:
"Oh you've gained weight again, and why are you still dressed like a boy"? After that she forced me to try on my great grandmother's moldy fur coat and asked me why I didn't like boys...
Ah family, great memories.
My mom wouldn't let me get rainbow Vans.
Me: Mom, can I have those Vans?
Her: The rainbow ones? Ew, no.
Me: Why not?
Her, speaking quietly: I don't want people to think you are gay.
Me: But there's nothing wrong with it!
Her: Yes there is, I will not let you get them.
Me: Fine. *rolls eyes*
Since she doesn't know the pride flags, I got some blue-purple-pink ones instead. I'm bi-ace. Lol.
After having had a car accident which left me crippled with back pain, I resumed swimming at 35. I started at my worst shape ever, my cardio was horrible and I was at pretty much double the weight my Dr would've liked me to be at.
At first, I couldn't 2 laps in a row without stopping to catch my breath and/or using my inhaler. After about 3 months, I could do 70 laps in a row, so I joined the local Triathlon club's swimming class to improve my technique.
Another 3 months later, I'm now swimming around 100-120 laps 3 times a week, and sharing at Christmas diner that my goal is to be able to swim a 3k race in a lake in an open water event the next summer.
My dad : yeah, but it's easy for you.
Me, looking at him quizzically
My dad, cracking up at his own joke : Well, just look at marine mammals!
So yeah, basically not dying, overcoming the trauma of the accident, transforming myself through sheer willpower into someone worthy of swimming alongside college students 15 years younger than myself DESPITE carrying the extra burden of my weight, that makes me a whale, manatee or beluga. And it's easy cause I "float".
Great. Thanks dad.
I looked away and spoke to my siblings the rest of the meal.
Kinda pisses me off that no one ever tells him off though. But whatever. People who see me swim call me a mermaid or a Valkyrie. I'm kind of both, and I love it.
"You are so pretty when you aren't heavy" - courtesy of my MIL, a few months after giving birth to her second grandchild from us in two years. (I gained about 35 pounds for the first and 2 pounds on top of that for the second). Meanwhile, her other son is a good 20 pounds underweight from switching to "healthier food intake". He was never overweight.
When I got the call that I have the job I wanted for years (after years of part time jobs and bad payment) I went to tell it my family their answer was “you’ll never know what might happen in the future so don’t be to happy about that”
My Aunt had a habit every time she saw me, she’d say “showing a bit too much cleavage there honey!” She would then grab the neckline of whatever I was wearing at the time and trying to tug it up…………I mentioned it to mum and informed her from then on I planned to wear my most low cut shirts/dresses………She approved!
Great response! Your aunt's physical behaviour also makes one wonder whether SHE wasn't enjoying the cleavage a bit too much herself...
My 71yo Aunt's husband who looked at my 21yo nigerian girlfriend saying that her skin color give him so much butterfly "down there"... My aunt was present so has my GF's mom...
Thirty years ago, my aunt (dad's sister) took me out to dinner to make sure I knew that the reason I was raped during a home intrusion a year earlier was because my mom was a whore when she was my age (she wasn't a virgin when she married my dad so... whore). "Sins of the father" type of bullshit.
She had only just found out about the assault because my dad made me keep it a secret from that side of the family or she would've informed me when it happened, I'm sure.
Cherry on top was becoming the "bad guy" in the family because I refused to be anywhere she was - I was supposed to put my feelings aside so as not to disrupt the family.
"Stop crying all the time." My grandma told me the day afther my mom killed herself. I was nine years old.
Someone at a wedding came up next to me and literally slapped my leg, remarking "that's for having tattoos!". If it had been a stranger I think I'd have punched them.
10 years of my life: elderly parents got sick, quit my job, moved in to take care them. Mom died in 6, Dad 4 years later. My older bro and younger sis did not visit, rarely called. After the reading of the will, brother said, “Your free ride is over. Get out. We’re (sister & him) selling the house.” I did corner bro at Dad’s funeral and said: “Your daughter saw how treated your parents. She will do the same to you.” Rest of the family hasn’t spoken to me since. Good riddance.
Cousin told me at Christmas time 2016 that I wasn't liked by anyone in the family because of my severe anger issues and autism. I know it wasn't true and he was just annoyed at me for being sad that my other cousins got camcorders and gopros and stuff and I got cheap dresses, but it still made me uncomfortable and angry
Yeah, my sister pulled that s**t. 'Nobody likes you. We all talk about it. Even momma and daddy.'
Oh you're here, we thought you would be staying home again
"Where's your "boyfriend"?" They used air quotes and everything! My reply was, "He's working." He always works weekends, still does and now he's my husband, I eventually had him take a Saturday off so they he could meet some of my more extended family.
I started pretending my husband was working so he didn't have to put up with my relatives. They do know he exists though.
My mothers uncle telling me that my boos are just the perfect size when I was only 14.
Not uncomfortable for me per say because I agreed and appreciated the sentiment, but definitely not the time lol. A little back story . My fiance' and I bought our first home and after it closed we took a trip to his family home state across the country. I had spoken to his grandparents regularly on the phone so they "knew" me but never met me in person. (they are in their 70's / 80's so no technology to video chat). It was my Fiance, me, his brother, his wife, and father all going. Brother J and his wife are a bit famous in the family because wifey is a gold digger and lazy. She never works, and when she does doesn't hold a job for more than a month or so. Spends all his money and when he was deployed there were other questions in the family about her faithfulness, anyhow... Grandpa is in his late 70's and is an old Puerto Rican New Yorker, he gives ZERO f***s about couth. (one thing I adore about him actually) Once we physically met we were instant pals and I adore this man immensely. We all went out for supper the first night and everyone was chatting and catching up. Out of nowhere gramps turns to Wifey and says "So you got a job yet?" She said laughing "No grandpa I'm a stay at home mom" "Why???" He boomed. "Kids have school no? What you need to stay home for now? They aren't in diapers." He looked at me. I thought oh s**t, my turn. "What about you? You still working?" "Yes Grandpa I am." "Still doing 35 hour of overtime a week?" "Yes Grandpa" "Ohhh so you don't live off my Grandson huh? That's good, that's good. How long do you have now at you job?" (15 years grandpa... almost 16." (Turning to her) "Huh so you retire in a few years then? Weird, see (Wife) it's not that hard." I about fell over laughing but held it together. Although awkward, it was nice to know I am not on that man's bad side. I'd like to feel bad for (Wife) but I can't I wasn't raised to take advantage of people and it didn't even bother her. When we got home she had a job handed to her on a silver platter. Work from home, great benefits and great money courtesy of my fiance. She quit just over a month later.
I could take up this whole thread with my mother-in-law but one time she asked my husband what my bra size is.
Made lots of jokes about mental disorders, and a good deal of homophobic comments.
People of color and people who don't speak English in my extended family. and my mom used to wonder why I never wanted to go for Thanksgiving. She no longer wonders
There's just always that one relative or a family member who has a lot of obnoxious stuff to say, nobody likes to hear it, but still has to. It seems like a magical ability to just share things that nobody wants to hear.
One relative of mine just talks non-stop about her ailments, it's depressing. The other just had some really unpleasant opinions.
I visited my uncle, after having not seen him in a couple years. A bunch of family was over, and I walked in the door, excited to see everyone. Before I could start to give Uncle a hug, he hit me with this furious look and demanded, "Are you actually going to vote for that f*****g b***h?" He then proceeded to throw every possible pearl-clutching FOX News propaganda at me. He didn't even say hi, how are you, how was the drive, do you want something to drink, nothing. Just shouting about how much he hated Hillary and "feminazis." It broke my heart that someone who I'd known and loved for 45 years now only saw me as a "librul" and his enemy. That was the beginning of me cutting off my entire family of Trump worshipping religious nutjobs and racist , -phobic assholes.
I'm sorry you lost your family to a cult, that s**t is terrible
Load More Replies...Given my dad's family, too many to choose, so I'll go with hubby. Annoyed by his family quesitoning yet again when we'd have kids when they knew I'd been told I can' have 'em... and having had a shot of hard lqiuor.. Hubby stood up in an elegant marina-side restaurant and said far too loudly, "We're not having kids I GOT MY BALLS CUT". And that, folks, ended that. :-) (This is why Hubby doesn't do liquor. He's *very* honest.)
Your hubby is platinum . Tell him from me
Load More Replies...Can't think of anything nice but there must have been something other than "Judy you should be a model. Afterall they all look like boys these days". Tall skinny and flatchested. Love that aunt but not best at complenting
"wow you look really old" brother the day my dad died who I and my 3 other brothers had been caring for round the clock for 3 weeks and watched him die while that brother had been in Spain getting a tan. "your legs are so white they are blinding me" same brother the day of my dad's funeral. Both times in front of big groups of family. I no longer speak to that brother as he has never been able to be polite in front of people
I hope what many of us are able to take away from this is that there are so many damaged adults passing down their own hurt, trauma and frustrations onto others. It's them, it's not you. It's not about you.
I know that's true. My mom used to say, "sticks & stones will break my bones but words will never harm me." I'd rather poke my eyes out with a stick rather than have to live with those words from someone who supposedly cares about you.
Load More Replies...Meeting a distant relative at a family wedding, stood next to my Aunt who introduced me, conversation went on to talk about my mother. When the distant relative asked “which one Jean or Catherine”? My aunt went white as a sheet and that was the moment I found out I was adopted by my birth mothers aunt and was brought up to believe she was my cousin (for context I was 30 at the time)
Wow, so many nasty, nasty, hurtful, jealous people around. What is wrong with all these people treating others like crap.
My Wife got a Parship coupon and got told, to get a proper husband. We are married now, but still hurts.
My a*****e evangelical brother told my other brother that his son, who had just died by suicide, “lost his battle with Satan.” All from his cozy vineyard tour in Italy.
Ah, yes, there's no hate like Christian love! I hope your family's had comfort since then.
Load More Replies...My uncle passed from covid a year ago. He was my dad's only sibling/brother. Their mother is mentally gone in a nursing facility, so my dad was doing everything to plan the funeral/expenses/etc. I wasn't close with my uncle but knew it hurt my dad deeply with so much of his family gone. At the funeral, one of my dad's cousins came up, teary-eyed. He then proceeded to say "well, we had to put our dog down yesterday." It took all of my self-control not to snap at him to suck it up while my dad was burying his brother. Yes, I love my pets, but I would not be comparing grief at a freaking funeral. I was also feeling very protective of my dad that day as he was trying to keep it together. Plus, the funeral home dug up the wrong grave (my uncle was cremated to be buried with his late wife, they accidentally dug up their father's grave instead, whoops).
How did a random “Author” on BP necro-repost this 11-month-old post as if it were new?
As a cocktail teenager who felt he had the right to comment on women's bodies my brother noticed my Aunt's unshaven legs - loudly proclaimed how disgusting they were to tye entire family. Laughing she said "if you think that's bad you should see my m*nge". And this was the day his feminist education really kicked up a notch.
I struggled with infertility, anxiety, and an eating disorder for many years. My EX mother-in-law told me it was clear God didn’t want me to pass on my genes. Jokes on her—I have two gorgeous kids, an amazing husband (not her son), and a law degree. All after the age of 35.
My dad: Those gay people, can't they act normal? Me: I think I'm pretty normal, I love both men and women 😁 Dad: ohh
Saying goodbye to my grandmother (Momma) at the hospital my mum said: My god your bum has gotten big. That was not what I needed to hear at that heartbreaking moment. (But true because Momma collapsed while I was on my honeymoom, and probably ate a little bit to much. But still.) My grandmother was more of a mother to me for years and years when I had almost no contact with my real mum. (Just because the ordinary divorce and busy with the new family) I miss her almost everyday and pester our children whit anecdotes about things she used to say. It makes me feel more connected to her in day to day life and not only in my memories. ❤️ All my love to you if you read this and missing a loved one.
Sorry for your loss! And it sounds as if your mum was envious of the special connection you had with your grandma, so she just had to find something negative to say. Give yourself time to grieve and do pester your kids to your heart's content. 😉 (Also, I'll take this opportunity to say, I'm glad to read you as I haven't seen you around, and apologies in case I answered you weirdly a while back, my ability to read comments properly may have temporarily suffered, lol)
Load More Replies...my mother is a desperately religious piece of work, but one of my favorites was right after she outed me to the world and was trying to convince me that I was just confused. After maybe the hundredth conversation over a very exhausting weekend visit, she was explaining that women naturally have special bonds with other women because we can relate to each other in ways that we just can't with men. I was tired and went for the nuclear option, so I smiled and said, "I know, right? That's why the s3x is so incredible!" last time we talked about it :D
so much toxic POS family members, fortunately I disowned all the ones like this. Just do not speak, contact, email, phone, acknowledge, or even go into the same space-time locale with.
One Thanksgiving, I was breastfeeding my daughter, when my cousin’s husband very loudly commented, “Geeze! I haven’t seen another woman’s breast since I married your cousin!” :-/
Was at Christmas and I turned 18 that year, legal adult in my country. My Godparent aunt who I really looked up to said to me in front of my parents. 'Thank god you are finally 18. Now I don't have to give stupid presents for your Birthday anymore. Till this day she can't understand and frowns when I adress her by her name instead of aunty.
I thought that what I heart say about my parents and me by our family members was really nasty and bad but this was way worse 🤦
Family can be toxic as hell . Just because their blood doesn’t mean you have to put up with their b******t . Shut them down hard, cut them out of your life and live in peace .
I love my Mom but she never thinks before she speaks. We were Christmas shopping at the mall and were commenting on how busy it was when she said that it was a good thing that we didn't have any "kids" to buy for because the toy departments were crazy. This happened 7 months after the death of my infant son.
You've got a point there... But to say that all men think that certain kind of behaviour is okay, that's not fair to all those men who are just as disgusted by those perverts action as we are. I know for af fact that if ever someone would pull a stunt like that with me, my SO wouldn't even blink twice, that man would be down within a few seconds. Is it the correct way of handling things? I don't know, but I would not stop him.
Ooof. Reading these accounts makes me feel like I'm back home again. We can start with the entire family looking at my baby pics and laughing because I was so "ugly" (and such an obnoxious screaming baby). Then, one time as a teen I was changing clothes with my mother in the same room and she told me the unforgettable, "God, you have ugly boobs." Those are just the bookends of a very unhappy childhood and a lifetime of low self-esteem.
All these parents are awful and everyone one of you are invited to come over and bake cookies with me. Also to Thanksgiving and Christmas. I hope you all realize how wonderful and worthy you are.
Suddenly very grateful to have my bunch of blunt best friends who just happen to be my mother and sibling - we all genuinely see each other as friends first - my sister in law is my best friend in the world - I just wish my dad were still with us. But, yeah, I consider myself very lucky to have found myself in a family who love spending time together
Lucky aren't we? And I've only found out in the last few years how rare it is
Load More Replies...How do some people procreate? Are their personalities not disgusting enough?
At a family gathering, my husbands aunt asked one of his friends "what is it like being black?".... in a gathering full of white people, with my husbands friend being the only black guy there.
Not a family member but a neighbor at my grandmother's wake cornered several people to let them know her kids wouldn't support her. They didn't give her money and they had jobs. Her kids didn't live with her. Great wake people left quickly.
Thanks you, you are the partner your family needs, I wish there were so much more like you.
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Load More Replies...I visited my uncle, after having not seen him in a couple years. A bunch of family was over, and I walked in the door, excited to see everyone. Before I could start to give Uncle a hug, he hit me with this furious look and demanded, "Are you actually going to vote for that f*****g b***h?" He then proceeded to throw every possible pearl-clutching FOX News propaganda at me. He didn't even say hi, how are you, how was the drive, do you want something to drink, nothing. Just shouting about how much he hated Hillary and "feminazis." It broke my heart that someone who I'd known and loved for 45 years now only saw me as a "librul" and his enemy. That was the beginning of me cutting off my entire family of Trump worshipping religious nutjobs and racist , -phobic assholes.
I'm sorry you lost your family to a cult, that s**t is terrible
Load More Replies...Given my dad's family, too many to choose, so I'll go with hubby. Annoyed by his family quesitoning yet again when we'd have kids when they knew I'd been told I can' have 'em... and having had a shot of hard lqiuor.. Hubby stood up in an elegant marina-side restaurant and said far too loudly, "We're not having kids I GOT MY BALLS CUT". And that, folks, ended that. :-) (This is why Hubby doesn't do liquor. He's *very* honest.)
Your hubby is platinum . Tell him from me
Load More Replies...Can't think of anything nice but there must have been something other than "Judy you should be a model. Afterall they all look like boys these days". Tall skinny and flatchested. Love that aunt but not best at complenting
"wow you look really old" brother the day my dad died who I and my 3 other brothers had been caring for round the clock for 3 weeks and watched him die while that brother had been in Spain getting a tan. "your legs are so white they are blinding me" same brother the day of my dad's funeral. Both times in front of big groups of family. I no longer speak to that brother as he has never been able to be polite in front of people
I hope what many of us are able to take away from this is that there are so many damaged adults passing down their own hurt, trauma and frustrations onto others. It's them, it's not you. It's not about you.
I know that's true. My mom used to say, "sticks & stones will break my bones but words will never harm me." I'd rather poke my eyes out with a stick rather than have to live with those words from someone who supposedly cares about you.
Load More Replies...Meeting a distant relative at a family wedding, stood next to my Aunt who introduced me, conversation went on to talk about my mother. When the distant relative asked “which one Jean or Catherine”? My aunt went white as a sheet and that was the moment I found out I was adopted by my birth mothers aunt and was brought up to believe she was my cousin (for context I was 30 at the time)
Wow, so many nasty, nasty, hurtful, jealous people around. What is wrong with all these people treating others like crap.
My Wife got a Parship coupon and got told, to get a proper husband. We are married now, but still hurts.
My a*****e evangelical brother told my other brother that his son, who had just died by suicide, “lost his battle with Satan.” All from his cozy vineyard tour in Italy.
Ah, yes, there's no hate like Christian love! I hope your family's had comfort since then.
Load More Replies...My uncle passed from covid a year ago. He was my dad's only sibling/brother. Their mother is mentally gone in a nursing facility, so my dad was doing everything to plan the funeral/expenses/etc. I wasn't close with my uncle but knew it hurt my dad deeply with so much of his family gone. At the funeral, one of my dad's cousins came up, teary-eyed. He then proceeded to say "well, we had to put our dog down yesterday." It took all of my self-control not to snap at him to suck it up while my dad was burying his brother. Yes, I love my pets, but I would not be comparing grief at a freaking funeral. I was also feeling very protective of my dad that day as he was trying to keep it together. Plus, the funeral home dug up the wrong grave (my uncle was cremated to be buried with his late wife, they accidentally dug up their father's grave instead, whoops).
How did a random “Author” on BP necro-repost this 11-month-old post as if it were new?
As a cocktail teenager who felt he had the right to comment on women's bodies my brother noticed my Aunt's unshaven legs - loudly proclaimed how disgusting they were to tye entire family. Laughing she said "if you think that's bad you should see my m*nge". And this was the day his feminist education really kicked up a notch.
I struggled with infertility, anxiety, and an eating disorder for many years. My EX mother-in-law told me it was clear God didn’t want me to pass on my genes. Jokes on her—I have two gorgeous kids, an amazing husband (not her son), and a law degree. All after the age of 35.
My dad: Those gay people, can't they act normal? Me: I think I'm pretty normal, I love both men and women 😁 Dad: ohh
Saying goodbye to my grandmother (Momma) at the hospital my mum said: My god your bum has gotten big. That was not what I needed to hear at that heartbreaking moment. (But true because Momma collapsed while I was on my honeymoom, and probably ate a little bit to much. But still.) My grandmother was more of a mother to me for years and years when I had almost no contact with my real mum. (Just because the ordinary divorce and busy with the new family) I miss her almost everyday and pester our children whit anecdotes about things she used to say. It makes me feel more connected to her in day to day life and not only in my memories. ❤️ All my love to you if you read this and missing a loved one.
Sorry for your loss! And it sounds as if your mum was envious of the special connection you had with your grandma, so she just had to find something negative to say. Give yourself time to grieve and do pester your kids to your heart's content. 😉 (Also, I'll take this opportunity to say, I'm glad to read you as I haven't seen you around, and apologies in case I answered you weirdly a while back, my ability to read comments properly may have temporarily suffered, lol)
Load More Replies...my mother is a desperately religious piece of work, but one of my favorites was right after she outed me to the world and was trying to convince me that I was just confused. After maybe the hundredth conversation over a very exhausting weekend visit, she was explaining that women naturally have special bonds with other women because we can relate to each other in ways that we just can't with men. I was tired and went for the nuclear option, so I smiled and said, "I know, right? That's why the s3x is so incredible!" last time we talked about it :D
so much toxic POS family members, fortunately I disowned all the ones like this. Just do not speak, contact, email, phone, acknowledge, or even go into the same space-time locale with.
One Thanksgiving, I was breastfeeding my daughter, when my cousin’s husband very loudly commented, “Geeze! I haven’t seen another woman’s breast since I married your cousin!” :-/
Was at Christmas and I turned 18 that year, legal adult in my country. My Godparent aunt who I really looked up to said to me in front of my parents. 'Thank god you are finally 18. Now I don't have to give stupid presents for your Birthday anymore. Till this day she can't understand and frowns when I adress her by her name instead of aunty.
I thought that what I heart say about my parents and me by our family members was really nasty and bad but this was way worse 🤦
Family can be toxic as hell . Just because their blood doesn’t mean you have to put up with their b******t . Shut them down hard, cut them out of your life and live in peace .
I love my Mom but she never thinks before she speaks. We were Christmas shopping at the mall and were commenting on how busy it was when she said that it was a good thing that we didn't have any "kids" to buy for because the toy departments were crazy. This happened 7 months after the death of my infant son.
You've got a point there... But to say that all men think that certain kind of behaviour is okay, that's not fair to all those men who are just as disgusted by those perverts action as we are. I know for af fact that if ever someone would pull a stunt like that with me, my SO wouldn't even blink twice, that man would be down within a few seconds. Is it the correct way of handling things? I don't know, but I would not stop him.
Ooof. Reading these accounts makes me feel like I'm back home again. We can start with the entire family looking at my baby pics and laughing because I was so "ugly" (and such an obnoxious screaming baby). Then, one time as a teen I was changing clothes with my mother in the same room and she told me the unforgettable, "God, you have ugly boobs." Those are just the bookends of a very unhappy childhood and a lifetime of low self-esteem.
All these parents are awful and everyone one of you are invited to come over and bake cookies with me. Also to Thanksgiving and Christmas. I hope you all realize how wonderful and worthy you are.
Suddenly very grateful to have my bunch of blunt best friends who just happen to be my mother and sibling - we all genuinely see each other as friends first - my sister in law is my best friend in the world - I just wish my dad were still with us. But, yeah, I consider myself very lucky to have found myself in a family who love spending time together
Lucky aren't we? And I've only found out in the last few years how rare it is
Load More Replies...How do some people procreate? Are their personalities not disgusting enough?
At a family gathering, my husbands aunt asked one of his friends "what is it like being black?".... in a gathering full of white people, with my husbands friend being the only black guy there.
Not a family member but a neighbor at my grandmother's wake cornered several people to let them know her kids wouldn't support her. They didn't give her money and they had jobs. Her kids didn't live with her. Great wake people left quickly.
Thanks you, you are the partner your family needs, I wish there were so much more like you.
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