“My Bed Bugs Had A Grudge And Their Revenge Was More Brutal Than I Ever Imagined”: Art Project

Ever wondered what pests could do if they could conspire devious plans of revenge? Well, I found out firsthand, and now, thanks to artist Natalie Condrac, I’m sharing the wild tale in her latest piece, “Bed Bugs.”

This mixed media sculpture, created with a variety of materials, depicts an uneven and treacherous stack of furniture, somehow balancing on its own. It tells a story that’s begging for a poem, and that's where I stepped in. Here’s the fantastical tale of my “Bed Bugs” nightmare:

It started in late August,

Red dots along my arm,

Bed bugs in my mattress,

But no need to alarm.

I got a spray to kill the pests,

And bombed the bed with tox,

And every piece of furniture,

And even every sock.

And that was it or so I thought,

Oh how I was so wrong,

Not only did they multiply,

But readied their swan song.

They ate through half the mattress,

And smashed the bed in two!

What was worse I do not know,

They even clogged the loo.

Then the stack had started,

Began with all the drawers,

My armchair pulled from under me,

And dragged across the floor.

Harassed the fish and stole my sink,

Ripped right out from the wall,

Water spilled, splashed and spewed,

And flooded down the hall.

No piece of mine was left to spare,

Nothing left untouched,

The chandelier came crashing down,

My teddy bear I clutched.

But cruel were they—they took him too,

And put him way up high,

The only thing I thought was,

“This is how I die.”

But then I had a brilliant plan,

And pulled out my billfold,

One dime per bug—they took the deal,

It simply took a toll.

This worked until I saw the line,

A billion bugs there sat,

Waiting for their coin to claim,

Now we share the flat.

More info: nataliecondrac.com