This made me chuckle

I have always liked this quote; “Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?” ― Epicurus

<3

Too bad he isn't still there.

He was probably banging his secretary that day.

The only thing that Jim misses are the good old days and the money.

There's no money to be made if you're quietly praying in your house.

bashing pagans ... while incorporating pagan beliefs in order to force/convert lands invaded by christians

Silly! They only teach televangelists the parts that can be used against "ethnic types"!

Oh no. Make no mistake. That day of training is never missed for people on a "mission" or "calling" to serve god. In the United States they're taught to take that question and deflect it with some sort of escape hatch christianese. The bible is so full of contradictions I wouldn't be a bit surprised if 3/4 of the time in bible "college" is spent on training the various escape hatches and the relevant christianese for each of them.

Mimes too

I was wondering if G-d has a hearing problem. Or maybe people need to enunciate better?

But apparently does nothing to stop it... 🤔

Inigo Montoya: "I do not think those words mean what you think they mean" :D

Don’t forget to tack on the 20% interest for each of the five easy payments.

also, masks aren't necessary in private, closed rooms.

Inches of cloth? More like less than one 1/6 of an inch.

What is that elephant doing?!

All hail the CVS cashier

Lol.

Well we all know that God only likes flashy rich folks. I mean look at Jesus. Dude was LOADED. *eye roll*

The breathing tube acts as an echo chamber.

Who said I was mortal...

Church of the Divine Profit, run by the Pharisees.

Amen.

Bakker in hell : "What? So it was true? Oh f**k!"

Televangescammer Kenneth Copeland did better when he said that even when people lose their jobs because of the coronavirus outbreak, they must continue giving to the church: "Whatever you do right now, don't you stop tithing!"

YES!

The synagogue I go to went online. That worked just fine for us.

Looks like the psychopath version of Lucille Ball.

What they’re trying to do is drown out your prayers by screaming (it doesn’t work).

Well, it was a BIG bang.

It's almost like he's a completely made up and nonsensical character.

Nope. Mutes go to hell, just like children killed before they're baptized.

I'm against Bakker and his evil grifting, but this comment is just completely false. Scientific study after scientific study have shown that petitionary prayer has the same outcome as random chance. Prayer is less than useless, it's detrimental. Jesus says that you can actually move mountains with prayer alone and faith the size of a mustard seed. Go do it! Go move a mountain with prayer. I won't hold my breathe while waiting. If COVID has shown us anything, it's that prayer is less than useless. Every person of every prayer denomination all over the world has prayed for over a year for COVID to end, and it hasn't. Science and human actions will be the only thing to stop COVID, not invisible sky daddies and magical thoughts.

He sure was absent at the holocaust.