Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app

Continue in app Continue in browser

5Kviews

127 Teacher Jokes To Lighten Up The Classroom

ADVERTISEMENT

Being in class all day can be quite a demanding activity, both for students and teachers. There are a few ways to make school more adventurous, though. And that’s cracking up laughter in the classroom with funny teacher jokes! Of course, just not when you’re deep in the learning process or are in a serious discussion with your teacher or classmates.

Now, jokes for teachers and jokes for students differ in caliber, and you might need to read the room well to get the best possible reaction. But we’re confident you’ll find the best one-liner for the audience. These jokes for school can range from playfulness with grammar rules, to wild takes of classic math problems. Be it math teacher jokes, literature, history, anything, you name it, we have it.

So if you’re a student and have been wondering what jokes you could tell your teacher, this list is for you. Even if you’re a teacher, you’ll find great comedy gold here to lighten the mood in your class.

So take out your notebook and get ready to write down some great teacher jokes! Share them with your colleagues or classmates and vote for your favorites. Just remember, joke responsibly!

This post may include affiliate links.

#1

I'm close friends with 25 letters of the alphabet, I don't know y.

25points

Shiba Inu 2 years ago

Is dat letter "u"!?

2points

View more comments

#2

T: One day we will be corruption free. Which tense is it?
S: Future impossible tense.

22points

Pam Akers 2 years ago

Love this one re: corruption free

1point

#3

I’ve been working on a Scandinavian joke. But it’s not quite Finnish.

21points

Persephone 2 years ago

My Latino biz partner intentionally says "sorry, my English isn't looking so good today", and I laugh every time

1point

View more comments

#4

T: Jimmy, you know you can’t sleep in my class.
S: I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I could.

21points

#5

The past, the present and the future all walked into a bar. It was tense.

19points

ADVERTISEMENT

#6

How was the Roman Empire cut in half?
With a pair of Caesars!

18points

Timmy Pillinger 2 years ago

Funny and correct

2points

#7

Who's the king of the classroom?
The ruler.

16points

#8

Do you know what’s odd? Numbers that can’t be divided by 2.

16points

ADVERTISEMENT

#9

Be like a proton, always positive.

16points

#10

Why was the geometry book so adorable?
Because it had acute angles.

16points

#11

What do you get when you cross a Software Engineer with an English teacher?
A programmar.

16points

ADVERTISEMENT

#12

T: Little Johnny has 10 cents, 2 dollars and another 7 cents. How much does he have?
S: Clearly, a money problem.

15points

Persephone 2 years ago

Here's my 10 cents, my 2 cents are free!

0points

#13

What do you do with a sick chemist?
If you can’t helium and you can’t curium then you’d better barium.

14points

#14

T: You missed school yesterday, didn’t you?
S: Not really.

13points

#15

What do you call bears with no ears?
B!

12points

#16

Why were the early days of history called the Dark Ages?
Because there were so many knights.

12points

ADVERTISEMENT

#17

Did you hear that old math teachers never die? They just lose some of their functions.

11points

#18

What did the left eye say to the right eye?
"Something between us smells!"

11points

#19

Why was six afraid of seven?
Because seven eight nine.

11points

Wondering Alice 2 years ago

You know why seven eight nine? He wanted three square meals.

4points

#20

What do you call a Frenchman in sandals?
Phlippe Phloppe.

11points

#21

What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!

10points

#22

T: What is the most common phrase used in school?
S: I don’t know!
T: Correct!

10points

ADVERTISEMENT

#23

Teacher: Whoever answers my next question, can go home.
One boy throws his bag out of the window.
Teacher: Who just threw that?!
Boy: Me! I’m going home now!

10points

#24

Where do pencils come from?
Pennsylvania!

9points

#25

What pencil did Shakespeare write with?
2B.

9points

Robert Trebor 2 years ago

Or not.

0points

#26

Went to Fibonacci conference last week, was as good as the last two put together.

9points

#27

A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but you mean your mother.

9points

Pam Akers 2 years ago

Nailed it.

0points

#28

Where did Nicholas Romanov II get his coffee?
Tsarbucks.

9points

ADVERTISEMENT

#29

Why is the math book so unhappy?
Because it's full of problems!

8points

#30

Why did the student eat his homework?
Because his teacher told him it was a piece of cake!

8points

#31

What do you call Santa's brothers and sisters?
Relative clauses.

8points

Robert Trebor 2 years ago

His elves are subordinate clauses.

0points

#32

What does the 0 say to the 8?
"I like your belt."

8points

#33

What do you call a belt made from watches?
A waist of time.

8points

#34

Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
At the bottom.

8points

ADVERTISEMENT

#35

What did the triangle say to the circle?
"You’re pointless."

8points

#36

T: Why are you late for school?
S: Because of a sign down the road.
T: What does the sign have to do with you being late?
S: The sign said, “School Ahead, Go Slow!”

8points

#37

Why are seagulls called seagulls?
Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels.

8points

Illustrious G 2 years ago

The correct way to write this would be “bay gulls”.

0points

View more comments

#38

What kind of school do you go to if you are ice cream man?
Sundae school!

8points

#39

Why do teenagers always travel in groups of three?
Because they can’t even.

8points

ADVERTISEMENT

#40

Why is 69 so scared of 70?
Because once they fought, and 71.

8points

#41

What do you call an acid with an attitude?
A-mean-oh acid.

7points

#42

Time is a great teacher... Unfortunately, it kills all its students.

7points

#43

What did the pencil sharpener say to the pencil?
"Stop going in circles and get to the point."

7points

#44

What dinosaur knows the most synonyms?
A thesaurus.

7points

#45

Why did the teacher marry the janitor?
Because he swept her off her feet.

7points

ADVERTISEMENT

#46

What is 5Q + 5Q?
10Q and you are welcome.

7points

#47

On the first day of school, what did the teacher say were her three favourite words?
"June, July and August."

7points

#48

What is a maths teacher favourite dessert?
Pi.

7points

#49

Why do magicians do so well in school?
They are so good at the trick questions!

7points

#50

Double negatives are a big NO-NO.

7points

#51

Why is the corner always the hottest part of the room?
Because it’s 90 degrees.

7points

ADVERTISEMENT

#52

What do you call a group of friends who love math?
AlgeBROS.

7points

#53

In the Periodic Table class, teachers have been warned not to let iron and carbon sit beside each other due to their tendency to steal.

7points

#54

What do you call a ruler, protractor and a compass all hanging out together?
Weapons of math instruction.

7points

#55

What did the acorn say when it grew up?
“Geometry!” (gee-I’m-a-tree)

7points

#56

Why don’t mathematicians sunbathe?
Because they can use sin and cos to get a tan.

7points

ADVERTISEMENT

#57

Why do geographers find mountains so funny?
Because they’re hill areas.

7points

#58

My English teacher used to quote lord of the rings to us. She used to say “you shall not pass!”

7points

#59

What do you call an English teacher with a social media addiction?
Instagrammar.

7points

#60

T: Anyone know any jokes about sodium?
S: Na.

7points

#61

Whoever put the letter "B" in the word "SUBTLE" deserves a pat on the back.

6points

#62

What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?
Bach in the saddle again.

6points

ADVERTISEMENT

#63

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school?
Because her students were so bright!

6points

#64

Why did the teacher write on the window?
Because the lesson needed to be clear.

6points

Robert Trebor 2 years ago

A diet teacher with a lessen plan.

0points

#65

What's a teacher's favorite nation?
Expla-nation.

6points

#66

Why did the teacher jump into the ocean?
To test the waters!

6points

#67

What do you call a music teacher with problems?
A very trebled man.

6points

#68

How do you get Pikachu on a bus?
You poke-him-on.

6points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

Dutch Swimmer Goes Viral For Super Revealing Trunks During 2024 Olympics: “Is This Legal?”

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

Thrill-Seeking Diver Jumps Down Extreme Waterslide, Ignoring The Strict Ban For Women

#69

What is the shortest month?
May: It only has three letters.

6points

#70

What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common?
The same middle name!

6points

#71

Which school teachers have the greenest thumbs?
The kinder-garden teachers.

6points

#72

T: We will only have a half-day of school this morning…
S: Yay!!!!
T: Then we will have the other half this afternoon.

6points

#73

T: What did you do at the weekend?
S: I did some cooking.
T: Lovely, what did you bake?
S: Synonym rolls just like grammar used to make!

6points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

Woman Put A Water Fountain With A Camera In Her Yard, Here Are 24 Photos Of Regular Visitors (New Pics)

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

“Ma’am I Live Here”: Woman Refuses To Back Out Of Driveway, Learns A Lesson The Hard Way

#74

What’s the longest word in the dictionary?
Smiles. Because there’s a mile between the first letter and the last.

6points

Robert Trebor 2 years ago

Smetre when you say that.

0points

#75

Why did the music teacher need a ladder?
To reach the high notes.

6points

#76

What are ten things a teacher can always count on?
Their fingers.

6points

#77

“A woman, without her man, is nothing.”
“A woman: without her, man is nothing.”
Punctuation is important.

6points

#78

A man went into a fish shop and said, “Can I have a tail end, please?”
So the man behind the counter said, "And they all lived happily ever after."

6points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

50 Of The Most Incredible Shots That Were Submitted To The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

French Diver’s “Jewels” In Tight Swimming Trunks Become Talk Of The Town At Olympics

#79

What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws. The other is a pause at the end of a clause.

6points

#80

5 vowels, 8 consonants, a comma, and an exclamation mark appeared in court today. They’re due to be sentenced some time next month.

6points

#81

Never date an apostrophe. They’re too possessive.

6points

#82

S: Can I go to the toilet?
T: I don’t know, can you?

6points

#83

What do you call an empty parrot cage?
A polygon.

6points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Woman Moves Out Of Parents' Home After They Asked Her To Give Her Space To Brother, They Freak Out

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

Mom Leaves $250k Inheritance To Son, Throws A Fit When Daughter Stops Looking After Her

#84

What type of snake measures 3.14159 meters long?
A pi-thon.

6points

#85

I went on holiday last week. I got an odd-job man in, gave him a list of ten jobs to do while I was away. When I got back, he’d only done jobs 1,3,5,7, and 9.

6points

#86

Where are all the top mathematicians buried?
In the Symmetry.

6points

#87

My math teacher asked me why I was doing my sums on the floor.
I said: “You told us to do them without using tables.”

6points

#88

A photon walks into a hotel and the receptionist asks if he needs any help with his luggage. The photon responds: “No thanks, I’m traveling light.”

6points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

Woman Refuses To Chip In For Babysitting Because She Doesn’t Even Have Kids, Asks If She’s A Jerk

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

“This Breaks My Heart”: People Stunned—And Angry—After Woman Buys Lost Luggage From Airport

#89

Reading a book on antigravity at the moment… I just can’t put it down.

6points

#90

Last night I dreamt I wrote The Lord of the Rings. Then I realized I was just Tolkien in my sleep.

6points

#91

Last night my classroom was broken into and all of the dictionaries were stolen. I’m lost for words.

6points

#92

Why can’t you run in a camp site but only ran?
Because it passed tents.

6points

#93

Why did the scarecrow win a Nobel Prize?
For being “out standing” in his field.

6points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

"I Didn't Start The Dryer": Karen Gets Taught A Lesson After Throwing Out Neighbor's Wet Clothes

Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

Guy Divorced 3 Years Ago Drops Off 3 Y.O. With His Ex-Wife Completely Out Of The Blue

#94

I will always tell you to follow your dreams, but I’ll never let you sleep in class.

6points

#95

A Roman walks into a bar. He holds up two fingers and says, “Five beers, please!”

6points

#96

What is the difference between a teacher and a train?
The teacher says “Spit your gum out” and the train says, “Chew, chew!”

6points

#97

How is an English teacher like a judge?
They both give out sentences. And they both judge you standing there.

6points

#98

What did one penny say to another penny?
"We make cents!"

5points

ADVERTISEMENT

See Also on Bored Panda

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

“All Three Shot Out Pink”: Triplets' Baby Shower Turns Sour, Pregnant Wife Wants A Divorce

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

College Student Does Exactly As Told After Roommates Demand They Keep Their Stuff In Their Room

#99

What did the Mason say to Dixon?
"We've got to draw the line here!"

5points

#100

Why is a piano so hard to open?
Because the keys are on the inside!

5points

#101

What do you say to comfort a grammar teacher?
"There their they're."

5points

#102

S: "Can I ask you a question?"
T: "You just have."

5points

#103

Why is the obtuse triangle upset?
Because he’s never right.

5points

Robert Trebor 2 years ago

That's kind acute

0points

#104

What kind of meals do math teachers eat?
Square meals.

5points

ADVERTISEMENT

#105

Why was the geometry class always tired?
Because they were all out of shape.

5points

#106

T: Give me a sentence beginning with "I".
S: I is the…
T: Remember you must say "I am" not "I is".
S: All right. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.

5points

#107

Child: I think we need a new teacher.
Mom: Why’s that?
Child: Our teacher doesn’t know anything! She keeps asking us for the answers…

5points

#108

What did the ghost teacher say to the class?
"Look at the board and I’ll go through it again!"

5points

#109

T: What can you tell me about angle c?
S: Hmm, it’s acute?
T: No, it’s a small island off the north coast of Wales.

5points

ADVERTISEMENT

#110

Why was the fraction skeptical about marrying the decimal?
Because he would have to convert.

5points

#111

Never trust an atom... They make up everything.

5points

#112

Why does Sweden have barcodes on all of its ships?
So they can Scan-di-navy-in.

5points

#113

On a scale of one to invading Russia in winter how bad was your idea?

5points

#114

T: Why have you got cotton in your ears? Do you have an infection?
S: Well, you keep saying that things go in one ear and out the other, so I am trying to keep them it all in!

5points

ADVERTISEMENT

#115

S: Would you punish me for something I did not do?
T: Of course I would not do that.
S: Great, because I did not do my homework.

5points

#116

Why is it sad that parallel lines have so much in common?
Because they'll never meet.

4points

#117

Where do pianists go for vacation?
The Florida Keys.

4points

#118

What do you call a teacher who forgot to take attendance?
Absent-minded.

4points

#119

T: If I had 8 oranges in one hand and 10 apples in the other hand, what would I have?
S: Big hands!

4points

ADVERTISEMENT

#120

What if math teachers are pirates and they just want us to find X so they can get the buried treasure?

4points

#121

There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. Only a fraction of you will get this.

4points

#122

What’s a dentist’s favorite time of day?
Tooth-hurty!

4points

#123

You can throw an envelope as far as you want, but it’ll still be stationary.

4points

#124

S: I don’t think I deserved zero on this test!
T: I agree, but that’s the lowest mark I could give you.

4points

ADVERTISEMENT

#125

What did they do at the Boston Tea Party?
I don’t know, I wasn’t invited!

4points

#126

T: Didn’t I just tell you to stand at the end of the line?
S: Well, I tried, but there was someone there already.

4points

#127

Why didn’t the skeleton go to the school dance?
Because he had nobody to go with.

3points

Linas Simonaitis

Linas is a SEO List Curator at Bored Panda with a bachelor's degree in Communication & Digital Marketing. Before, he did a quick internship at AMII and worked as a Wolt courier (in other words, before Bored Panda, he never had a real job). After an intense day of Googling and scrolling, he likes to lose himself in League of Legends or make a couple pretzels while practicing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Never shies away from a deep conversation, never runs out of jokes. Also an owner of 0.0028 Bitcoin.

Linas is a SEO List Curator at Bored Panda with a bachelor's degree in Communication & Digital Marketing. Before, he did a quick internship at AMII and worked as a Wolt courier (in other words, before Bored Panda, he never had a real job). After an intense day of Googling and scrolling, he likes to lose himself in League of Legends or make a couple pretzels while practicing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Never shies away from a deep conversation, never runs out of jokes. Also an owner of 0.0028 Bitcoin.

Melanie Gervasoni

Writer on a quest to explore every corner of the world, one country at a time. Fueled by my love for Arcane, oversized hoodies, and weightlifting, I try my best to bring even more fun energy to Bored Panda. My cup of tea? Pop culture, funny content, sharing interesting facts about the world, and creating listicles for fellow Pandas. When I’m not crafting articles, my eyes are still glued to a screen — be it binge-watching my favorite shows, leveling up in video games, or learning Spanish with Duolingo. Always on the hunt for the ultimate playlist, I scour Deezer to find the right tunes to listen to while working on my creative projects.

Writer on a quest to explore every corner of the world, one country at a time. Fueled by my love for Arcane, oversized hoodies, and weightlifting, I try my best to bring even more fun energy to Bored Panda. My cup of tea? Pop culture, funny content, sharing interesting facts about the world, and creating listicles for fellow Pandas. When I’m not crafting articles, my eyes are still glued to a screen — be it binge-watching my favorite shows, leveling up in video games, or learning Spanish with Duolingo. Always on the hunt for the ultimate playlist, I scour Deezer to find the right tunes to listen to while working on my creative projects.

Neilas Šurkus

I'm Neilas, Content Production Manager for Bored Panda in the Home & Design category. In this role, I try to ensure the quality of our articles to bring the best possible web surfing experience to our readers. I love a well-structured, informative, and illustrative article, whether it's for design ideas, gardening solutions, or cute dogs and cats. I made it my mission to ensure our readers get to experience the same thing. As for my personal interests, I produce music, sometimes go out and take pictures of nice stuff, and have petrol running through my veins. I'm an avid fan of Formula 1 and Motorsport in general, taking every chance I get to burn some rubber at local go-cart tracks. Of course, movies, gaming, and racing simulators are a big part of my daily life, too.

I'm Neilas, Content Production Manager for Bored Panda in the Home & Design category. In this role, I try to ensure the quality of our articles to bring the best possible web surfing experience to our readers. I love a well-structured, informative, and illustrative article, whether it's for design ideas, gardening solutions, or cute dogs and cats. I made it my mission to ensure our readers get to experience the same thing. As for my personal interests, I produce music, sometimes go out and take pictures of nice stuff, and have petrol running through my veins. I'm an avid fan of Formula 1 and Motorsport in general, taking every chance I get to burn some rubber at local go-cart tracks. Of course, movies, gaming, and racing simulators are a big part of my daily life, too.

What do you think ?

You May Like

80 Funny Pun Jokes To Make Everyone Laugh At The Table

Akvile Petraityte 🇺🇦

‘Ends Humour’: 50 Spot-On Posts That May Leave You Chuckling At The Ridiculousness Of It All (New Pics)

Viktorija Ošikaitė

100 Funny Country Jokes To Kindle Your Wanderlust

Saimonas Lukošius

Back to Homepage

More about Jokes

Related on Bored Panda

Related on Bored Panda

Word Search

WordroW

Jigsaw

Crossword

Sudoku

Picdoku

Killer Sudoku

Kriss Kross

Word Flower

Trending on Bored Panda

Also on Bored Panda