43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience

What an incredible twist of fate - one of the greatest minds that humanity has ever known in its entire history remains in our memory not so much because of his ingenious theories, but because of an accidental, completely ridiculous photograph with his tongue out when he just wanted to tease the photographer.

Yes, history knows many examples when very smart and decent people accidentally blurted out something incredibly stupid - and then regretted what they said for many-many years. And then collections of such 'gems' rack up thousands of upvotes and laughable comments online - like, for example, this one in the AskReddit community, the best stories from which we bring to your attention today.

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43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I was on a long train trip, gazing out the window, when I said to my friend: “I feel like every railroad crossing gate we’ve passed since I’ve been looking has been down… what are the odds…”

I have a PhD (not in trains).

Orioliolios , Jad Limcaco Report

Final score:

216points

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Hey! 7 months ago

***face palming***

56points

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43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I was watching a TV show (can't remember what) with my family. There was this cute black girl who appeared in a scene and had a nice, short hairstyle I thought was cool. I said out loud "If I was black, I would have my hair like that."

I am a black guy. I meant to say girl.

NaJay365 , Elizeu Dias Report

Final score:

190points

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Bear Hall 7 months ago (edited)

Richard Pryor as a blind man in "See no evil, hear no evil": "What do you mean I'm not white?! .. Why didn't you tell me this before?! .. Does Dad know?!" Genius.

74points

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43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience "If there are adult diapers, why aren't there adult strollers?"

My husband, looking at me like he regrets ever meeting me: "you mean wheelchairs??".

TrainwreckMooncake , Marcus Aurelius Report

Final score:

183points

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TheGoodBoi 7 months ago

I wouldn't mind being pushed around in a huge baby stroller with a visor on it.

63points

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In fact, people do sometimes say something stupid or shameful, for different reasons, in various circumstances. Sometimes this simply becomes a consequence of a basic misunderstanding between the interlocutors, sometimes the speaker just finds themselves in a real 'stupor' in response to an unexpected request. A classic example is when you are asked to say something funny.

Have you ever encountered anything like this? As soon as someone asks you about it, even if you have been doing standup comedy all your life, have watched all the sitcoms in the world and know all the sites with jokes by heart, you will clearly 'freeze' in a painful attempt to remember something. Don't believe me? Then come on, remember something funny right now!

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Back when I was working my first job at a mcdonalds during highschool, I was made manager and one of my coworkers was a guy named Miles. We called him Kilometers because hurr durr such original joke.

Anyway, one day I was grabbing a drive thru order while also trying to stock stuff and I noticed we were out of napkins, so what I MEANT to say was "Hey Miles, can you go grab us some napkins from the back real quick?"

What I ACTUALLY said was "Hey Napkins, can you go grab us some stuff from the back real quick?"

And everyone stared....

IN SILENCE

After a few seconds, Miles realized I was looking at him when I said it and said "Did...you just call me 'Napkins'?"

My brain went over what I just said as the embarassment said in and I just answered "Yes. Yes as a matter of fact, I did."

His nickname was no longer Kilometers. He was Napkins from that day on.

Diablix , RDNE Stock project Report

Final score:

174points

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BLONDTROBL 7 months ago

In HS I was announcing Bingo for our mostly (not me) Polish community. I proudly stated that the next round's winner would also be getting a Kosher ham. The hall broke out in hysterics. I learned that the delicious ham was a Krakus, famous brand of Polish ham. Nothing to do with Jewish food prep and pork.

56points

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43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Me to the lady that I thought looks like me (as I was in passing): “Oh hey! It looks like we could be twins!”

My reflection: …..

It had been a long shift.

Delayedshipping , Brooke Cagle Report

Final score:

161points

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Hey! 7 months ago

Oh, yeah. The problem is when you no longer recognize that person in the mirror.

58points

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43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience One time I was in the grocery store and a couple were in front of the jar of pickles I wanted to get. They noticed me standing there and said, "Oh, are we in your way?"

They moved and I grabbed the jar. I then turned to them and said, "Thanks." Then--for some reason I'll never understand--added, "I like pickles."

They must have been thinking, "Well, it's nice that they let him do his shopping on his own.

CraniumCrash12 , Марта Тюзова Report

Final score:

156points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

You should have explained! "These pickles! It's these pickle I like! Can't live without them..." More would have been so much fun.

29points

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In addition, there are two reasons why stupid words and phrases from smart people are remembered. Firstly, because they aren't expected to do anything stupid, and against the general 'highbrow' background, these unexpected remarks stand out like Jerry Jones against the background of the current NFL free agent market. And secondly, people are prone to reflection - and the stupidity said will quite possibly torment a person with shame for years and even decades.

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience "You hit me in the cervix!"
I am a man. I meant sternum. Still have to shake that memory out of my head sometimes.

HereticPrime97 , Andrea Piacquadio Report

Final score:

151points

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Hey! 7 months ago

That's hilarious!!!

41points

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43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience My manager's manager asked me to ballpark the percentage of time I was spending on each of my three projects. I confidently told him: 75% on project A, 25% on project B, and 25% on project C. I heard my cubicle neighbor laughing (didn't immediately click that she was laughing at me). Manager's manager paused a moment, then in a very kind and patient voice (like he was speaking to a Labrador with a learning disability) "So, I'd like those numbers to add up to 100%. Can you try again?" Then it dawned on me.

AreHipposBitey , fauxels Report

Final score:

137points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

Hey, you're always saying we need to give 110%, right? I just upped it.

83points

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43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Years ago a coworker and I were discussing how many Japanese people apparently have a KFC dinner for Christmas. We then wondered "What do they do for Thanksgiving?" and began attempting to google it. Spent quite a few minutes trying to search it up, remarking to each other in confusion that we couldn't find anything at all. I then realized how incredibly stupid we were.

firfetir , Alva Pratt Report

Final score:

135points

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JELLY 7 months ago

Americans 😅

71points

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“People tend to remember negativity against an overall good background - this is a general trend,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, whom Bored Panda asked for a comment here. “For example, it's enough to compare the ratio of good and bad reviews on the page of any decent restaurant.”

"And this, again, is quite understandable. If we go to a restaurant which is considered to be great, then by default we expect great service - and take it for granted. Otherwise, this causes a clear reaction of rejection. And the adrenaline reaction to negativity encourages people to act much stronger, than positive impressions. So it turns out that stupid phrases from smart people are remembered for a long time. However, the opposite is also true," Irina summarizes.

#10

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Me, crossing the border from Mexico to CA. Border Patrol guy. " what is your country of origin?" Me, thinking That's easy! Me to border guard "California" Guy gave me a look for a moment, and then just said, "Go,"

Quick-Temporary5620 , CDC Report

Final score:

132points

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Libstak 7 months ago

Guy thought, yup that's definitely an American

158points

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#11

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Got introduced to identical twins. First thing I said was "wow, how can you guys tell each other apart?".

MisterFives , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:

125points

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TheElderNom 7 months ago

I've been asked by at least three people if my niece and nephew are identical twins. Always after they've gotten to know they are a boy and a girl. But even if you know nothing of science they look nothing alike. Hair colour, skin tone, face etc they are very, very different.

46points

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#12

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience OK , here goes, I was going to be late for my Psychology class. The teacher had already warned me not to be late.

What do I see in my rear view mirror on the way to class? You guessed it , I was speeding and it was Police lights ! So I pull over and I give the Officer my drivers license, reg and ins. papers, and he seemed very friendly and nice, and he says I will be right back pureGoldie, Thats when i got real dumb, I said "Oh btw , will you write me a note for my teacher? Ive already been warned not to be late today? I know this is making me late for sure!" He replied with a big smile , "Oh , I am going to write you a note, alright!"

Yep , I was that dumb.

pureGoldie , Kindel Media Report

Final score:

120points

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Hey! 7 months ago

The time, place, and price were on that little note too!

67points

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In any case, the selection of stories that we've collected in this list is incredibly interesting and funny, so please feel free to scroll it to the very end and maybe add your own tales here. After all, each of us has come up with some incredible stupidity at the most inopportune moment. Me too, by the way. So let's do this - if this post collects 100 upvotes and comments, I definitely tell you in the comments which stupidity I once blurted out (and just believe me, it's damn worth it)!

#13

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience What's a chocolate bar?
A lady told me that she loved chocolate bars and I pictured a bar that serves chocolate instead of booze for a moment, and then I felt very stupid.

Peptic_Germ , Aleksey Nosov Report

Final score:

114points

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Did I say that out loud? (he/him)cis/het 7 months ago

You may have just had a brilliant business idea.

11points

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#14

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience "your born in december?? that sucks you have to wait a whole year for your birthday".

SuperSawyer07 , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:

112points

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Tucker Cahooter 7 months ago

I'm at that age in life where I wish it was *more* than a year before my next birthday

36points

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#15

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Was really blanking on this casual friend’s last name. I talk to them pretty regularly and everything. But I was just BLANK. Wouldn’t come to me so had to go to Facebook and look it up. We have the same last name.

cloud_watcher , Juan Pablo Serrano Arenas Report

Final score:

109points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

I have a similar problem; when brain scanning for missing name- if my brain suggests a common one, it's automatically rejected; particularly if correct..

28points

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#16

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Not too much ice please, don't wanna water it down. (It was literally just a cup of ice water).

kitteh619 , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:

106points

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WindySwede 7 months ago

Irony is sometimes indistinguishable?

19points

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#17

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience “Oh look, it’s a full sun out today”.

imadeacrumble , James Wheeler Report

Final score:

106points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

Makes perfect sense... if you're a vampire.

37points

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#18

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience "Garbage truck drivers must have the chillest job in the world. They only work one day a week!"

- me for the first 16 years of my life.

Status_Passion_358 , Carl Campbell Report

Final score:

99points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

You have a standard-issue brain, there

39points

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#19

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I called my husband in a panic because I couldn’t find my phone. I actually asked him if he knew where my phone was. His answer - ah..in your hand? So yeah.

InvisblGarbageTruk , George Dolgikh Report

Final score:

98points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

You wanna guess how many of us have identical stories?? yeah, like 125%?

77points

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#20

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I said it would be nice if we had a “mirror app”!

BeKindImNewButtercup , Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 Report

Final score:

97points

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Trophy Husband 7 months ago

Long time ago, before front cameras, I saw an app that would make the screen black so it would sort of be a mirror. You could just turn the screen off though...

12points

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#21

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Me: hi how are you
Them: good how are you
Me: good, how are you.

crazymom7170 , Kampus Production Report

Final score:

97points

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SilverSkyCloud 7 months ago

and so it continued, doomed to never end

56points

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#22

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience When planning a trip to America, I was very confused as to why google maps was refusing to give me a walking route to the Statue of Liberty. Turns out you can’t walk to the Statue of Liberty because it’s in the water 🙃.

redneck_girlypop , Avi Werde Report

Final score:

97points

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Hey! 7 months ago

Not as crazy as the rest of this post. I didn't know that either.

62points

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#23

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience This one still haunts me. I once was having surgery and in walks the anesthesiologist to ask me questions and see if I had any for him. I said, "just two. Do people dream?" And he responds, "not usually. What's your other question?" And I said, "is it normal to be afraid I won't wake up." And he goes, "I promise you will."

Me: "well I bet I won't!"

I. BET. I. WON'T.

I bet the anesthesiologist I was going to die. Like a f*****g idiot.

SaraSmashley , Karolina Grabowska Report

Final score:

94points

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Kayleigh Haigh 7 months ago

You can actually dream whilst under anesthetic my mum did and when they brought her round after her surgery she asked the nurse "as it finished yet" the nurse asked if she meant the surgery my mum replied "no power rangers tell my kids to turn it off im sick of seing it" she had dreamt my siblings and i were watching power rangers and forgot she had just had surgery she said it was one of most embarrassing moments of her life lol

36points

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#24

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience One time I said I wish I could swim in the air & my friend said “You mean flying?”.

Not_AMermaid , Mantas Hesthaven Report

Final score:

85points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

Don't be silly, I have swim fins, but not wings!

21points

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#25

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I was at home in my apartment alone and cleaning up and realized I hadn’t plugged the vacuum in. “Come on John,” I said out loud to myself, which was weird since I never talk to myself out loud, and the worst part was it came out, “C’mon Jnonn”

Like how do I call myself by name and then pronounce it wrong.

Key-Plan5228 , Annushka Ahuja Report

Final score:

85points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

Sometimes called a brain fart. :-)

33points

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#26

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I was in grade 1, had a Canadian girl come to my school, sprung up a friendship. Looked her dead in the eyes and asked. "What swear words do you know in Canadian" she tried to tell me multiple times it was the same words and I refused to believe her. I toss and turn at night knowing she probably tells people that now.

Senpailydia , Andre Furtado Report

Final score:

84points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

She lied!! French has lots of swear words!

51points

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#27

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Claimed that the slowest animal is probably an enema. I misspoke and meant to say anemone. I'll never forget the looks of confusion from my coworkers.

goldrising84 , Pixabay Report

Final score:

81points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

and the enema jokes never stopped - "Hey new guy! Be careful around him- you wouldn't want him for an enema!" and on and on

33points

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#28

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Asked a server at a Mexican restaurant if their quesadillas had cheese in them. In front of my Mexican American grandfather. He very patiently asked me what the Spanish word for cheese was and then I realized my mistake.

ShortStack6554 , Lottie Griffiths Report

Final score:

81points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

But, Abuelo, I thought quesa was Spanish for Grandma...

30points

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#29

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience "it gives me testosterone"

serotonin. i meant serotonin.

EtherealPossumLady , karatara Report

Final score:

74points

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PFD 7 months ago

I tried to buy melatonin in the pharmacist's. That triggered a very confusing conversation (in a language I barely speak) before we realised I'd actually asked for melanin.

26points

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#30

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience What is the name of the dog from schobby doo.

No_Word_494 , Rotten Tomatoes Classic Trailers Report

Final score:

70points

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Stefaan De Clerck 7 months ago

Well, there was Scrappy-Doo (younger nephew of Scooby-Doo), Scooby-Dum (older nephew), Scooby-Dee (niece), Yabba-Doo (brother), Dooby-Doo (another brother), Mumsy en Dada Doo (parents), Whoopsy-Doo (another nephew), Ruby-Doo (sister and mother of Scrappy-Doo), Skippy-Doo (smart brother with glasses), Howdy-Doo (another brother), Horton-Doo (uncle) and Dixie-Doo (brother).

75points

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#31

My boss asked me to print an address label for some documentation they had to mail out.

My printer was out of ink so I told her I was unable to print said label/mail the document out in time

....she then explained that I could just _write it by hand_.

Smrt.

BoiledGnocchi Report

Final score:

70points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

Can't. My handwriting is full of typos.

41points

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#32

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I don’t know if this counts because praise the Lord I did not say it aloud.

The scene:
Me, a college senior still living in a dorm doing my weekly snacks and root beer run at the local Wal-Mart

The thought: “Man, how do people with a whole family grocery shop? Like what do you do if you buy more than you can fit in your arms?”

Carts. That’s what carts are for.

ArtemisGirl242020 , Edward Report

Final score:

69points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

But you REALIZED! See! College education really helps!!

55points

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#33

Playing table tennis with my partner and having the absolutely phenomenal brainwave of 'hey wouldn't it be cool if this was like a game that was way bigger with a big net and you have to like run around to get the ball and oh wait that's just tennis.'
This the same week and I was holding my daughter up in front of a low fish tank so I was squatting down and thought 'it would be so helpful if someone could like something sturdy to push under you while you squat to make it more comfortable oh wait that's literally a chair'.

Lady_Ange Report

Final score:

68points

POST

SH Holmes 7 months ago

You are having good ideas, but way too late.

66points

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#34

"Huh, it's funny, I haven't ever seen a Bruce Willis movie."

"You haven't seen Die Hard?"

"Oh wait yeah I did see Die Hard."

"Sixth Sense?"

"Oh yeah that too"

"Fifth Element? Armageddon?"

  :..........."

  Turns out I've seen a lot of Bruce Willis movies.

No_Cauliflower_2416 Report

Final score:

67points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

Oh! He used to have hair?? No wonder!

29points

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#35

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I made a dentist appointment yesterday. They gave me a date and asked if 10:50 was a good time.

I replied with "I'm assuming that is 10:50am...".

DustOfTheSaw , Krivec Ales Report

Final score:

65points

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Victor van Schagen 7 months ago

About two months ago I learned of the existence of 24h dentist practices. No idea if this exists in th USA, but in some countries the question is not impossible :-)

27points

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#36

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience Ordered a burger with no onions, then onions rings because I don’t like onions. The look the waitress gave me was priceless. She said I think you maybe just don’t like onions raw. Yeah…that’s what I said. I don’t like onions. Argued with her for 5 minutes and couldn’t understand why she was questioning if I wanted onions on that burger.

CricketsAreJaded , Arteum.ro Report

Final score:

64points

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Phil 7 months ago

My ex-Mother-In-Law swore up and down that she is allergic to pine nuts. This from a woman who loved pesto.

41points

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#37

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience It was years ago and I was waiting tables. A lady came in and asked for a hot diet coke. I asked how tf I was supposed to make her a hot diet coke. She told me to put it in the microwave. My response verbatim.

" But the ice will melt ".

theghostsofvegas , Kenny Eliason Report

Final score:

62points

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Kali Chaos 7 months ago

What in the actual... I've been in the service industry for 22 years and I have never heard of this. Is this a thing?

42points

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#38

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I was at a job interview for a baking job. The Interviewer asked me if I know how to bake. I told her no but I can read.

Meaning I can follow the directions of a recipe.

abbacuss_ , Gustavo Fring Report

Final score:

58points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

I can bake. I know lots of people trying to bake who can't read!

21points

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#39

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience About ten years ago or so I was at a restaurant and went to the restroom. I told my mom and daughter, "When the waitress comes back, can you have her bring some more ice?

My water is too watery."

My family does not le me forget.

hilhilbean , cottonbro studio Report

Final score:

52points

POST

Cosmikid 7 months ago

Exactly what families are for! Now- you just have to stockpile some for THEM...

16points

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#40

My girlfriend asked me to put her clothes in the dryer and I got irritated and said “well where are they???”.

Efficient_Run63 Report

Final score:

50points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

In the wetter, doofus.

117points

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#41

I once thought that Alaska was an island because it's always shown separate on maps. I felt so dumb.

enflammey Report

Final score:

44points

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Cosmikid 7 months ago

Hey, it used to belong to Russia, so who knows where it was?

17points

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#42

43 Times People Said Something So Damn Stupid They Created A Truly Memorable Experience I asked what half of 200 was. When I was given looks of “you’re joking right?” I quickly realized what an idiot I really was.

gdpinleoeee , jaikishan patel Report

Final score:

41points

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WindySwede 7 months ago

Don't keep us hanging, tell us the answer! /jk

34points

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#43

Had a friend in college whose sister was taking an ASL course. He started asking a question and I tried so hard to stop him because I could see the wheels spinning in his head. He asked,

“So can you read Braille?”.

_JPH_ Report

Final score:

39points

POST

ƒιѕн 7 months ago

I always see this as Age/Sex/Location.... I'm getting old.

1point

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After many years of working as sports journalist and trivia game author and host in Ukraine I joined Bored Panda as a content creator. I do love writing stories and I sincerely believe - there's no dull plots at all. Like a great Italian composer Joaquino Rossini once told: "Give me a police protocol - and I'll make an opera out of it!"

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I am a visual editor here. In my free time I enjoy the vibrant worlds of art galleries, exhibitions, and soulful concerts. Yet, amidst life's hustle and bustle, I find solace in nature's embrace, cherishing tranquil moments with beloved friends. Deep within, I hold a dream close - to embark on a global journey in an RV, accompanied by my faithful canine companion. Together, we'll wander through diverse cultures, weaving precious memories under the starry night sky, fulfilling the wanderlust that stirs my soul.

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What do you think ?

POST

Hey! 7 months ago

When my youngest son got married, one of the staff saw my flower on the wrist and asked me who I was. "Mother of the Bride!" No you're not, said THE mother of the bride! LOL. And I had just came in and she was already 3 drinks down.

18points

FlamingoPanda 7 months ago

Asked my sister why the flags were all flying the same way. As an adult. Just one of many dumb things I have said when my brain has timed out.

10points

ILoveMySon 7 months ago

I took a friend boating and a fire boat passed. He asked if I knew how much water they carried.

9points

Pedantic Panda 7 months ago

Was once at a birthday party for a one year old. Speaking to the dad and struggling for conversation said, your kid is getting big, what age is he now? One. Obviously one.

9points

Marianne 7 months ago

I once did a guided tour of a palace in Bavaria, where I saw a beautiful painting of Sissi (empress Elisabeth of Austria). And my dumb self asked the tour guide: "Is this a wedding photograph?". I didn't realize what I had said until this very confused guide told me that, actually, it was a painting. Picture. Picture is the word that I was looking for.

8points

David 7 months ago

Many years ago, before I knew sign language, I was talking to a young deaf lady via notes. I wrote, "How long have you been death?" DEAF! I meant deaf. LOL

7points

Petra Schaap 7 months ago

im in the UK a lot. The other day i decided that i was going to get rid of my coins because i never use them. I gave them to the first homeless person i met. It was quiet a bit so he was very happy (maybe 10 pound) and he went like "oh wow thank you so much!!" i just smiled and wanted to say "no problem, take care man" and for some reason i said "no problem, i love you man" I RAN.

7points

PeachPossum 7 months ago

Went to a Lebanese food festival, paid for our entrance tickets. I turned to my friend and said, "Oh, look at us! We're honorary lesbians..."

7points

Kenneth Smith 7 months ago

I was in line for Laff Trak at Hersheypark. They have a large painting of a girl laughing on a mural, her mouth wide open. I commented to my preteen daughter and her friend that Laughing Sally sure had a large vulva. My wife quickly informed me that I meant to say uvula.

6points

Bols 7 months ago

Once on a geography test in school I wrote that capital of Romania is Bangladesh... Also on my driving exam the examiner asked me to leave the test area and go to the street and I asked twice which way should I turn before noticing it was a one-way street

6points

Cat Dragon 7 months ago

One time one of my classmates asked "why is Ukraine so close to Russia if they know they're gonna get bombed?" And I have never had so little faith in humanity.

5points

Olli Hawk 7 months ago (edited)

I had a school project one time and I was giving a presentation on braille and what it is, when my friend asked what I chose for my presentation, I told him braille, and he paused and said “but you’re white…” I was like yeah? He said “you’re not braille-ian”

5points

Munchkin 7 months ago

One of my best friends was recalling a well known film called Crocodile Dundee. She explained it as "it had alligators in it!"

5points

Milady Blue 7 months ago

A very dear friend told me of a good brain fart he had. He was babysitting another friend's dog, and wanted to get the dog a toy, so they could go out into the woods and play. He went into a local store, and looked around, but could not find the pet section. Went up to a male employee, and asked, "Excuse me, where do you keep your balls?" The employee gave him a strange little smirk, and my friend kept digging himself in deeper, "You know, the ones you can play with?" The employee was snickering and turning red at this point, and my friend ended with, "You know, the ones you..." and he pantomimed throwing something. Mercifully, the employee led him to the pet section, and was not quite out of earshot when he lost it, and started screaming with laughter.

3points

EmJay 7 months ago

Once my mom asked me what dog breed a dog we saw was, i said "i think its a k9" for those who don't know, k9's are just any dogs

3points

Elizabeth 7 months ago

We actually have a name for this in my family! We call it a "Blair Moment", named after my older sister because she does this more than anyone else who ever lived (she actually loves that we named it after her). All of these entries fully constitute as examples of Blair Moments. Some genuine Blair Moments from the namesake include: The time she freaked out because there was "blood under her skin" (she googled what a bruise was). When she thought that King Kamehameha the 1st was alive and out greeting the commoners (we drove past his statue while in Hawaii). During the same trip she also was concerned that the queen was going to get mad at us for taking pictures in front of the palace. The queen…of Hawaii…which is a US state and has not had a queen since 1893! See why we all call them "Blair Moments" yet?

3points

DRMAGDN 7 months ago

My dad told me a dad joke that I didn't get when I was in grammar school. He said that Pennsylvania was named that way cause a guy found a pencil and named it Pennsylvania. Next week in school, teach asked, I replied with the dad joke. Everyone laughed except the teacher. She was mad af. I had literally no idea why. Whoooosh. Lol.

3points

Shannon Matthews 7 months ago

One of my cringiest moments was when I was ordering in a McDonalds drive through. I literally placed my order then confidently added "to go". Ugh.

3points

Brian bell 7 months ago

It is "sharpest knife in the drawer." If people are storing knives in their closet I might be thinking red-flag thoughts...

3points

AUndomiel 7 months ago

My niece and I were discussing flying home at the same time and meeting at the airport to share a rental car. She was looking at the ticket she was about to purchase and says: New plane again. Me: What? A new plane where? Niece: I always seem to get on new planes, they all have the same low mileage +/- 1500. Me: That's the distance of the flight. She made me promise to take it to my grave.

2points

Olli Hawk 7 months ago

I remember arguing with my friends about what stage the moon was in, (it was like 4/5 of a moon, my friend said it was a full moon) one of my other friends looked in the opposite direction of the moon and said “what are you talking about that’s a new moon!”

2points

Aussiegirl 7 months ago

Mum went to have a nap when I was a kid & said don’t wake me up unless the Queen comes over. Not long after there was someone at the door & I said ‘Are you the Queen?’ HE wasn’t. Obviously I didn’t know who the Queen was but my brothers & sisters had a good laugh..

1point

Pittsburgh rare 7 months ago

My daughter lost her keys one day and I informed my then boyfriend that I had put a sign on my apartment's staircase for whoever found the keys please return them to apartment #...the look on his face is something I cherish 🤣. Hadn't he told me it WASN'T a good idea l'd have probably left it. Luckily, it was only up for a couple hours and the keys never appeared.

1point

Another Panda 7 months ago

THIS made me laugh a lot

1point

Headless Horseman 7 months ago (edited)

My husband & I were getting ready for bed when I told him to turn off the sun. Light, I mean light. He wont let me forget this.

1point

E 7 months ago

Friend's adult daughter once wondered out loud 'Where Christopher Columbus stopped for gas'. Realized her error immediately, but not fast enough to live it down...

0points

Jaybird3939 7 months ago

I worked for a Marriage and Family therapist. One time, she came out after an appointment and said "Gee, all the couples I see have such marital troubles!" Oh, how we laughed!

0points

Christine Cameron 7 months ago

I worked at a coffee shop. Woman ordered 4 cappucinos and one Americano and asked me to label each cup. I suggested we just mark the Americano with an "A" since the other four drinks were identical, she flapped her hands and me and said "no, no, label the others or they'll all get mixed up." So I wrote a "C" on each of the other cups and made her happy.

0points

POST

Hey! 7 months ago

18points

FlamingoPanda 7 months ago

Asked my sister why the flags were all flying the same way. As an adult. Just one of many dumb things I have said when my brain has timed out.

10points

ILoveMySon 7 months ago

I took a friend boating and a fire boat passed. He asked if I knew how much water they carried.

9points

Pedantic Panda 7 months ago

Was once at a birthday party for a one year old. Speaking to the dad and struggling for conversation said, your kid is getting big, what age is he now? One. Obviously one.

9points

Marianne 7 months ago

8points

David 7 months ago

Many years ago, before I knew sign language, I was talking to a young deaf lady via notes. I wrote, "How long have you been death?" DEAF! I meant deaf. LOL

7points

Petra Schaap 7 months ago

7points

PeachPossum 7 months ago

Went to a Lebanese food festival, paid for our entrance tickets. I turned to my friend and said, "Oh, look at us! We're honorary lesbians..."

7points

Kenneth Smith 7 months ago

6points

Bols 7 months ago

6points

Cat Dragon 7 months ago

One time one of my classmates asked "why is Ukraine so close to Russia if they know they're gonna get bombed?" And I have never had so little faith in humanity.

5points

Olli Hawk 7 months ago (edited)

5points

Munchkin 7 months ago

One of my best friends was recalling a well known film called Crocodile Dundee. She explained it as "it had alligators in it!"

5points

Milady Blue 7 months ago

3points

EmJay 7 months ago

Once my mom asked me what dog breed a dog we saw was, i said "i think its a k9" for those who don't know, k9's are just any dogs

3points

Elizabeth 7 months ago

3points

DRMAGDN 7 months ago

3points

Shannon Matthews 7 months ago

One of my cringiest moments was when I was ordering in a McDonalds drive through. I literally placed my order then confidently added "to go". Ugh.

3points

Brian bell 7 months ago

It is "sharpest knife in the drawer." If people are storing knives in their closet I might be thinking red-flag thoughts...

3points

AUndomiel 7 months ago

2points

Olli Hawk 7 months ago

2points

Aussiegirl 7 months ago

1point

Pittsburgh rare 7 months ago

1point

Another Panda 7 months ago

THIS made me laugh a lot

1point

Headless Horseman 7 months ago (edited)

My husband & I were getting ready for bed when I told him to turn off the sun. Light, I mean light. He wont let me forget this.

1point

E 7 months ago

Friend's adult daughter once wondered out loud 'Where Christopher Columbus stopped for gas'. Realized her error immediately, but not fast enough to live it down...

0points

Jaybird3939 7 months ago

I worked for a Marriage and Family therapist. One time, she came out after an appointment and said "Gee, all the couples I see have such marital troubles!" Oh, how we laughed!

0points