This story again? How many different versions of this story is this woman going to write before she finally publishes her romance novel?

Did I read this somewhere else? If so, I understand why she might post it several times over and that is because she is distraught and deep down she knows she has to leave husband but she wants someone to push her over that edge.

Ohhhh, he took away her phonesie wonsie? What a strong parent he is. Any partner of his is going to be his daughters perpetual doormat in life. He will be alone, forever, or he will be married to some defenseless waif who can't understand she's being abused by him and his precious evil daughter. OP should run. Step kids like this do not get better when the parents are incompetent.

Cancell the wedding immediately the girl souds dangerous. I have a difficult stepdaughter and our relationship is still strained after over 30 years regardless of her father's efforts. It doesn't get better with time.

The kid spoke loud and clear. She does not want her dad to remarry. OP should walk away and take time for self care. That little demon will run her dad's life with an iron fist.

Although it’s an oft-repeated story, I love some of the responses for just how outlandishly idealistic they are. What particularly strikes me is the “counseling” option. With 50/50 custody & functional co-parenting, does anyone really believe the ex-wife who hates the fiancé is going to sign off on counseling?it’s so easy to create the narrative that the counseling is about forcing the daughter to like or obey the new step-mom, as impossible as it would be to accomplish such. The daughter doesn’t seem willing to go voluntarily & her mommy is gong to support her in this since she wants OP out of the picture anyway. As there also can’t be consequence for her actions to stepmom, given both parents come up with punishment & accountability, there’s absolutely zero option for resolution. If I were OP, I’d walk away shouting in every direction what the ex did to show why Alan will never take her back & id blast the hell out of the daughters actions. 12 is old enough to know better.

She should call upon her fairy godmother to magic her a dress and turn the kid into a pumpkin.

After dating a man with kids in my 20’s I learned the hard way that it isn’t for me. I’m sure I’ve missed out on some great experiences because of it and maybe some of my potential boyfriends with children had the potential to become my husband. I don’t regret avoiding the situation altogether. This is one situation where no matter how much you love someone and how much effort you are willing to put in the relationship, it will still come apart horribly and painfully.

She's getting it from her mom and mom not setting boundaries of respect for you as a co parent and a human being. Ask her flat out if this was her dress to a prom and you did that would it make it right to just be like "well your date to prom isn't gonna stick around so who cares about the prom dress?" She would prob say idc anyway. I'd call it off. Get the money back you can. And a 3 yr relationship into marriage that fast is a bit rushed honestly. Why? Because he deep down wants to show his ex he's a catch. He might not want to get back with his ex but this relationship marriage is totally too fast to have been something for you to share or make any bonds with his kid. Move on. And at least it wasn't the heritage dress she messed up. Mail it to her on her wedding day so she can remember how f****d up she was to someone getting married in her past.

Assuming this is real I'm just kind of wondering what kind of father to a 12yo marries a woman his daughter clearly hates? It's not like she's 18 and about to move out, but she is going to have her dad's GF/ Wife in her life for many years and should kind of be allowed a say. She's 100% behaving like a brat and shouldn't get away with it, but I think the dad should either have less custody or sit down and have a talk with his kid before it even got to this point

They're Not even living together! Child might grow up eventually but with a mother like that and a dad who's s**t at parenting, this childs behaviour, spiteful will be ongoing for Years. Wait til she has children..... Escape.

Immediately when they said that mom Carrie hoped they'd get back together I knew this child has been being told that he doesn't keep any relationship ever "waah wah waah poor me". He took her phone away, but did he go through it and find the probably definitely there messages with her mom about this?

this is wrong.

I admire OP's restraint in not smacking the heck out of the little brat. But seriously, whilst the idea of that brat "winning" is abhorrent, OP should put her own mental health first... either send the kid packing off to her mothers for the next 6 years, or cut ties with both kid and fiance.

The ex is a narcissist and the daughter is now one to. Part genetic disposition and part parenting. She's doing to the OP what her mom did to her dad. She can't marry this man as she'd also be marrying all these toxic issues. They're weeks away from the wedding and don't live together yet. Likely due to the daughter. That says everything about the state of the relationship. She needs to cancel the wedding and sit him down (maybe with a therapist present) and tell him he got out of his abusive relationship and now she needs to get out of hers. He and the daughter are a package deal, but the daughter is abusive. So marrying him would be tantamount to marrying an abuser. He likely won't be able to have a healthy relationship until his daughter is an adult and he either sets appropriate boundaries or ceases a relationship with her.

1: They are a package deal. That kid is a dealbreaker. 2. Alan was p-whipped by his wife and is being p-whipped by his 12-year-old daughter. You cannot marry a man who has no b*****.

Wait until it's Rose's wedding, then destroy HER dress. Not just that, but gaslight and lie and spread nasty rumors. Hey, it's not evil! It's called revenge.

Tell Alan the dress and veil cost $xxx. He needs to pay you for it. If he won't pay, then tell him: then let me pick stuff from bratty daughter's room to destroy that totals the same value and burn it all in front of the kid (outside). Obviously, I'm kidding, but call the wedding off but sit down with Alan and his brat and explain exactly why. Then say to the daughter, who is 12, what you did was unforgivable. If you keep acting like this, you'll never have a stable relationship growing up, make poor choices, be a manipulative dysfunctional AH like your mother, and eventually NO ONE WILL CARE ABOUT YOU. Then tell Alan to enjoy being single forever because you ex is gaslighting and manipulating your daughter for her own pleasure. One day, your ex will abandon that kid. He owes his daughter to go for full custody and limit mom's contact with her, plus get the kid therapy. The kid needs therapy.

I don't understand how people can get married without living together before ! How do you want a child to understand the relationship is serious if their father doesn't live with their future stepmother ? How do you want to have any good relationship in those conditions ? Real story or not, the question remains...

"Dinner was ready and I went to get rose. I passed my bedroom door and something about the way the sliding closet door was positioned made me want to check." Lines from a Gothic Romance novel.