Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Interview With Expert

Traditionally, fathers are the ones to walk their daughters down the aisle. However, due to shifting norms and complicated family dynamics, new ways are emerging to embrace this custom, like having another family member accompany the bride or even walking to the altar solo.

Redditor beige_donut19’s daughter chose her uncle as her bridal escort instead of her stepfather. Such a decision was made for her when she overheard him saying she wasn’t his ‘real’ daughter. This majorly upset him but didn’t fully stop him from attending the wedding in visibly dampened spirits.

Scroll down to find the full story and a conversation with wedding business owners Jennifer Clark and Elizabeth Wexler, who kindly agreed to answer a few of our questions.

Due to shifting norms, the traditional father-daughter walk down the aisle is changing

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Image credits: Mikhail Nilov / pexels (not the actual photo)

In this wedding, the bridal escort was the bride’s uncle and not the stepfather, which stirred quite a discussion

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Image credits: Josh Willink / pexels (not the actual photo)

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Image credits: Alison Leedham / pexels (not the actual photo)

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Image credits: Lilen Diaz / pexels (not the actual photo)

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Image credits: beige_donut19

The tradition stems from the days of arranged marriages when a father ‘gave the daughter away’ and ensured the groom wouldn’t back out

The bride walking down the aisle is one of the most memorable moments of any wedding day. It functions as a sort of grand reveal and marks the beginning of the ceremony.

“The bridal walk down the aisle is the ultimate spotlight moment, a major core memory, and the one major moment on the wedding day that [a couple is] equally excited for,” says Nicole Harris, owner and creative director of Dreams in Detail. “It is filled with anticipation and excitement and nerves, and it holds so much meaning for everyone. It marks the start of the ceremony, the start of forever, and it changes the energy in the room.”

According to wedding historian Susan Waggoner, the tradition stems from the days of arranged marriages when a father ‘gave the daughter away’ and ensured the groom wouldn’t back out. It was seen as a kind of business transaction, as women were still considered to be the property of men back then.

Today, this act has acquired a new meaning and is seen as a way to support the next chapter in the soon-to-be-married couple’s life. “Modern weddings have really changed up the traditional father-daughter walk down the aisle. These days, you might see both parents walking with the bride, a close friend or relative stepping in, or even the bride choosing to walk alone,” explains wedding planner and owner of Elopers Jennifer Clark.

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Image credits: Ignatios Kourouvasilis / pexels (not the actual photo)

Some brides choose to walk solo as a way to show their independence and that marrying their partner is their choice

Many modern brides are further reinventing the tradition and choosing alternative ways to walk to the altar. Clark says that the reasons behind this are often associated with their family dynamics. “Some may want to honor both parents equally, especially if both played significant roles in their lives. Others might not have a relationship with their father, or their father may not be present.”

“We have also seen a more modern take in which the couple, separately, walks alone either the entire way or halfway, and then meets up with their parents, symbolizing less of a “giving away” and more of a unification,” mentions Elizabeth Wexler, owner of Emlan Events.

An option that some LGBTQ+ couples have embraced is eliminating the walk altogether, breaking the heteronormal nature of the processional. It’s a great alternative for a couple who might have introverted tendencies, too. “Being front and center in front of all of your guests is certainly not for everyone!” says Wexler.

“It’s so important when planning that you do what feels right to you,” she concludes. “Just because a tradition exists, doesn’t mean it’s for you.”

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Image credits: Mikhail Nilov / pexels (not the actual photo)

Some readers justified the author’s behavior

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Meanwhile, others shamed her behavior

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

The bride also joined the discussion, posting an update

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Image credits: SHVETS production / pexels (not the actual photo)

Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

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Hi, glad you swung by! My name is Austėja, and I’m a writer at Bored Panda. With a degree in English philology, I’m interested in all aspects of language. Being fresh out of university, my mission is to master the art of writing and add my unique touch to every personal story and uplifting article we publish. In my time here, I’ve covered some fun topics such as scrungy cats and pareidolia, as well as more serious ones about mental health and relationship hiccups. When I’m not on my laptop, you’ll probably find me devouring pastries, especially croissants, paired with a soothing cup of tea. Sunsets, the sea, and swimming are some of my favorite things.

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Hi there! I am a Visual Editor at Bored Panda. My job is to ensure that all the articles are aesthetically pleasing. I get to work with a variety of topics ranging from all the relationship drama to lots and lots of memes and, my personal favorites, funny cute cats. When I am not perfecting the images, you can find me reading with a cup of matcha latte and a cat in my lap, taking photos (of my cat), getting lost in the forest, or simply cuddling with my cat... Did I mention that I love cats?

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What do you think ?

POST

mulk 5 months ago

I think they are from: "The Philippines, the only country other than the Vatican where most married couples are not allowed to legally divorce"

33points

Guess Undheit 5 months ago

It also explains "English is not my first language" while writing as if it is. The Philippines has the second largest English speaking population in the world, larger than the UK.

18points

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R Dennis 5 months ago

My stepkids are my stepkids and I am their stepdad... their deadbeat dad was always in their lives. When my daughter was born, it did feel different. But I didn't care for my stepkids any less and I tried to raise my daughter the same way I raised them (minus the bio-dad trauma). They were never given a wedge and they are all siblings, not half-siblings. They are equal to me and my family, even though inside it definitely feels different. And I would never say they weren't my real kids.

22points

Sunny Day 5 months ago

Robert isn't mad that Sarah doesn't consider him "real family" anymore. Robert is mad that people now know it. It wasn't that "he wanted to walk his daughter down the aisle", it's that "he wanted to be SEEN walking his daughter down the aisle". Everything is about HIM and how he is perceived in society. People are supposed to look at him and think "what a great guy", not "I wonder what caused the family disharmony". Don't bother seeking an apology from him. He wouldn't mean it anyway.

19points

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POST

mulk 5 months ago

I think they are from: "The Philippines, the only country other than the Vatican where most married couples are not allowed to legally divorce"

33points

Guess Undheit 5 months ago

It also explains "English is not my first language" while writing as if it is. The Philippines has the second largest English speaking population in the world, larger than the UK.

18points

Load More Replies...

R Dennis 5 months ago

22points

Sunny Day 5 months ago

19points

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Woman Catches Stepfather Saying She’s Not His “Real” Child, Makes Him Regret It Years Later

Due to shifting norms, the traditional father-daughter walk down the aisle is changing

In this wedding, the bridal escort was the bride’s uncle and not the stepfather, which stirred quite a discussion

The tradition stems from the days of arranged marriages when a father ‘gave the daughter away’ and ensured the groom wouldn’t back out

Some brides choose to walk solo as a way to show their independence and that marrying their partner is their choice