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“AITA For Telling My Son That He’s Not Coming On Vacation Because He Didn’t Check His Emails?”
Digital communication surely changed the way family members communicate. And it probably all depends on the family members themselves whether the change is for the better or worse. Let’s not forget that people of different ages use digital communication tools differently. And that brings new challenges to the table.
One of the challenged people recently turned to the r/AmItheAsshole community to ask who was wrong in the situation he found himself in. Was it the son, who was not picking up his father’s calls and answering his emails, or the father, who banned his son from a family trip because of one mistake?
More info: Reddit
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Sometimes communicating on different channels than others can cause a serious rift
Image credits: Stephen Phillips – Hostreviews.co.uk (not the actual photo)
A father punishes a son by not letting him go on family vacation when the son doesn’t answer the father’s email
Image credits: Alarming_Ebb3027
Son’s mother argues if only the father would have texted his son, all this drama would have been avoided
A father decided to plan a family Thanksgiving vacation to the Cook Islands. He found a great deal for it. He needed to know if his 20-year-old son wanted to go as soon as possible, so he could get visas for his other sons in time. And so, he emailed his son about the deal on Friday. Then called on Sunday. No answer. So, he took the silence as the son not wanting to go on the trip, then bought the tickets for himself and the rest of his sons.
And then his son texted him that he wanted to go. The father told him it was too late since he already bought the tickets. Next time he should answer his emails or calls on time. The son’s defense was that most people his age communicate only by text.
The OP’s ex and his son’s mother stood by her son. According to her, if the father had texted the son, he would have gotten an answer immediately. But that doesn’t matter to the OP. He says that he checks all his communication channels, and so his son should too.
Image credits: Datingscout (not the actual photo)
Talking about communication channels, let’s take a look at what Gen Z uses for communication outside of the Reddit story. Are texts really the most popular channel?
Well, according to the study done by Edison Mail, the most used communication channel is, in fact, text messages. It was reported as being used by 69% of the study’s respondents.
The second place went to email with 31% and the third was social media with 29% of respondents. All other less-used channels were messaging apps, phones, and video calls.
People on the internet nearly unanimously decided that the father was the jerk in this situation. Some say that he got angry that the son didn’t pick up the phone and took it out by banning him from the trip. Others call him out on saying that he checks all his communication channels, but when it comes to texting his son, he refuses to do it. That means he doesn’t properly use all his communication channels or is just a stubborn jerk!
People online decided that the father was a hypocritical jerk who took out the unwarranted anger on the son
Image credits: Brett Jordan (not the actual photo)
Image credits: S’well (not the actual photo)
Image credits: freestocks (not the actual photo)
What do you think ?
dremetrius 1 year ago
This just outright sounds like dad doesn't want to take the 20yo and was looking for a good excuse to say "whoopsie, I tried my best!" Unfortunately for him he's an idiot and his clever plan was so shoddy even Baldrick would have had no trouble seeing through it.
Ace 1 year ago (edited)
Anyone old enough to remember communications before email, before SMS, and even before answering and fax machines were commonplace should recognise that the luxury of near-instant communications relies heavily on knowing the preferred toolset of your recipient. For example, much as I would prefer everything to be done by email, all nice and controllable, I've had to accept that for many things the norm here has become Whatsapp so if I want to be heard I have to move with it.
Chez2202 1 year ago
Absolutely. I know that most of my family are WhatsApp people. We have a family group so we can all be aware of arrangements. My daughter doesn’t like WhatsApp so I text her or send an instant voice message because that’s how she likes to communicate with me. That’s also how the rest of our family contact her because they know her. This guy had time to sort out Visa’s for his 3 younger sons in his second family but not for his older son from a previous relationship. He hasn’t only done his eldest son a disservice, his younger sons are also going to miss out on time with their older brother who they probably would love to spend time with.
Load More Replies...
Sara Wilson 1 year ago
So...1 email and 1 call over what, 1-2 days, and that's all the notice he got?! Maybe he was in the middle of an assignment or something. And why not text?! Most younger people, and even me at 45, don't really check email regularly and I don't often listen to my VM's. Usually let them build for a week or two, because if there id anything important, I get a text or a follow up call. Yes, I say OP IS the AH here.
dremetrius 1 year ago
This just outright sounds like dad doesn't want to take the 20yo and was looking for a good excuse to say "whoopsie, I tried my best!" Unfortunately for him he's an idiot and his clever plan was so shoddy even Baldrick would have had no trouble seeing through it.
Ace 1 year ago (edited)
Anyone old enough to remember communications before email, before SMS, and even before answering and fax machines were commonplace should recognise that the luxury of near-instant communications relies heavily on knowing the preferred toolset of your recipient. For example, much as I would prefer everything to be done by email, all nice and controllable, I've had to accept that for many things the norm here has become Whatsapp so if I want to be heard I have to move with it.
Chez2202 1 year ago
Absolutely. I know that most of my family are WhatsApp people. We have a family group so we can all be aware of arrangements. My daughter doesn’t like WhatsApp so I text her or send an instant voice message because that’s how she likes to communicate with me. That’s also how the rest of our family contact her because they know her. This guy had time to sort out Visa’s for his 3 younger sons in his second family but not for his older son from a previous relationship. He hasn’t only done his eldest son a disservice, his younger sons are also going to miss out on time with their older brother who they probably would love to spend time with.
Load More Replies... Sara Wilson 1 year ago
So...1 email and 1 call over what, 1-2 days, and that's all the notice he got?! Maybe he was in the middle of an assignment or something. And why not text?! Most younger people, and even me at 45, don't really check email regularly and I don't often listen to my VM's. Usually let them build for a week or two, because if there id anything important, I get a text or a follow up call. Yes, I say OP IS the AH here.
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