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Bride Wants Sister To Attend Her Wedding After Trying To End Her Engagement, Gets A Reality Check
It’s such a beautiful feeling to introduce your special someone to the family, hoping they’ll be welcomed with open arms. But sometimes, family members don’t exactly approve, and in rare cases, they might even tell your fiancé they deserve better.
Just like this woman shared in a shocking revelation: her own sister tried to convince her fiancé to call off their engagement, calling her “boring.” With her sister’s wedding now around the corner, the author’s family urged her to let it go for the sake of peace. Keep reading to find out if she chose to attend the wedding or not.
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Sometimes, family members can sabotage your relationship
Image credits: Ahmed / unsplash (not the actual photo)
A woman shares her anger after her sister met with her fiancé and told him he could “do better”
Image credits: Blake Cheek / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Sufficient-Basis-641
Letting your partner meet your family can feel like a monumental step in a relationship
Image credits: Nicole Michalou / pexels (not the actual photo)
Introducing your better half to your family is a major milestone in any relationship. It’s not always about how long you’ve been dating or following some rule of thumb. Often, it’s about how you feel about the person and whether you’re ready to share this special part of your life with your loved ones.
A 2016 survey by JOE.ie found that more than half of men preferred to wait a minimum of three months before introducing their partner to their parents. Interestingly, the same percentage of women agreed. The three-month mark seems to strike the right balance—enough time to feel confident about someone without rushing into big, potentially nerve-wracking family meetings.
For others, a month can feel long enough. One in three men in the survey felt that a month is the perfect amount of time to wait before bringing their partner home, and one in four women felt the same way. It seems for some, a strong connection can come quickly, making them comfortable introducing their partner relatively soon.
Then there’s the cautious crowd. Just under 20% of people surveyed believe in waiting a solid six months. And in a rare case of patience, only about 2% of people said they would wait over a year. It’s hard not to feel a little sympathy for the other halves of that 2%—imagine waiting a whole year to meet the family!
For various reasons, some people choose to keep their partner away from their family
But hey, not everyone feels the need to introduce their partner to family, and that’s totally okay. Some people prefer to keep their relationship private until they’re absolutely sure it’s serious, avoiding prying questions or unwanted opinions.
For others, the decision comes down to protecting their partner from potential family drama. Sometimes, families can be complicated or unpredictable, and they might worry about how their loved ones might react.
In some cases, families can be particularly judgmental or critical about their loved one’s choice of a partner. This can make introductions a little intimidating. That fear of disapproval might keep you from wanting to share your relationship with family too soon.
But in this particular incident, the family dynamics took an unexpected turn. Here, the author’s sister went out of her way to interfere. Instead of simply meeting the author’s fiancé, she gave him unsolicited opinions. What do you think drove the author’s sister to act this way? Have you ever had a family member speak negatively about you to your partner?
People online supported the author, with some even suggesting she attend her sister’s wedding and seek revenge
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What do you think ?
LB 10 months ago (edited)
I would arrange a meeting with the future BIL and tell him he can do better than this biatch who's actively trying to break up her sisters marriage. She won't mind because her relationship is strong enough to deal with that, surely.
Tabitha 10 months ago (edited)
I would make sure Mark attends that meeting, so it isn’t just OP’s word against her sister’s. Plus, my petty a*s would go to the wedding and make sure my fiancé proposes in front of everybody, just to steal sister’s thunder. I might even wear white, to boot. And when sister’s husband finally dumps and divorces her, I would make sure Mark and I hire a babysitter so we can throw a party to celebrate with him. Then, on our fiftieth wedding anniversary, we can invite sister, and all of her many exes, to celebrate our true love and strong commitment to each other. Rub her nose in it.
Load More Replies...
Zoe Vokes 10 months ago
Maybe OP’s life is better than her sister’s. Maybe Mark is a better partner, OP has a better job, maybe they have a bigger house and can afford a more expensive wedding. And sister is so jealous that she wants OP to not have more happiness in life than her. Maybe she has been stewing in jealousy and resentment for years. If she spent her childhood and teenage years thinking she is the better sister for being more outgoing and fun (because she had more friends in school and more boys interested in her), then how dare OP do better in life than her when they are in their adult lives.
Sara Shamsabadi 10 months ago
have you recently hit your head??! That's the only acceptable excuse you'd be able to use to EVER speak to this crazy narcissist. She's supposed to be YOUR sister!! She sounds selfish, is gaslighting you badly & is deranged! I'd never speak to her again & feel justified by it. What type of family member is that?! I hope you get counseling & never hear from her again. Good luck & don't even consider going to the wedding, nor inviting her crazy a**
Katharina Sei. 10 months ago (edited)
Actions have consequences. Ideally, the perpetrators should also feel the consequences. Personally, I wouldn't go to the sister's wedding. I would apologize to her fiancé in advance and tell him what happened. (Of course, you can question why the well-being of a strange man is more important to her than that of her sister. ) I would also clearly communicate this information to close relatives/acquaintances who would be expecting me at the wedding. This way, the groom is forewarned and the relatives don't have to ask at the wedding. Whether this results in chaos or not is up to the family dynamics and is a consequence of her doing.
Susie Elle 10 months ago
She's jealous of your relationship with Mark. My gut feeling is that the sister has feelings for Mark and was hoping to break their relationship, then cancel her own wedding and run off with Mark. It's outrageous, but I'm willing to bet that's what's going on.
Gavin Johnson 10 months ago
Just over twenty years ago my brother got married, certain family members were definitely not invited, I actually had to keep an eye out for them prior to the ceremony as they’d threatened to turn up unannounced. They’d been nothing but toxic in the run up to the wedding. Thankfully they didn’t turn up and a good time was had by all, a few family members grumbled about traditions regarding family being put first and he’d caused aggravation by not inviting the toxic pair. Roll on twenty years, no one on our side of the family communicates with them, he and his wife started the end of all of our dealings with them and we are all better for it. Cut out the rotten and toxic individuals in your life, in time you’ll see how their negativity is best left behind.
Tyke 10 months ago
I'll never understand: Adult "Child" 1: does something to p*ss off Adult Child 2 which is also totally unacceptable and out of order. Adult Child 2 stands up for themself. Queue parents to Adult Child 2: no, you can't be upset you'll ruin the family. ADULT CHILD 1 ALREADY DID THAT. FFS.
LB 10 months ago (edited)
I would arrange a meeting with the future BIL and tell him he can do better than this biatch who's actively trying to break up her sisters marriage. She won't mind because her relationship is strong enough to deal with that, surely.
Tabitha 10 months ago (edited)
I would make sure Mark attends that meeting, so it isn’t just OP’s word against her sister’s. Plus, my petty a*s would go to the wedding and make sure my fiancé proposes in front of everybody, just to steal sister’s thunder. I might even wear white, to boot. And when sister’s husband finally dumps and divorces her, I would make sure Mark and I hire a babysitter so we can throw a party to celebrate with him. Then, on our fiftieth wedding anniversary, we can invite sister, and all of her many exes, to celebrate our true love and strong commitment to each other. Rub her nose in it.
Load More Replies... Zoe Vokes 10 months ago
Maybe OP’s life is better than her sister’s. Maybe Mark is a better partner, OP has a better job, maybe they have a bigger house and can afford a more expensive wedding. And sister is so jealous that she wants OP to not have more happiness in life than her. Maybe she has been stewing in jealousy and resentment for years. If she spent her childhood and teenage years thinking she is the better sister for being more outgoing and fun (because she had more friends in school and more boys interested in her), then how dare OP do better in life than her when they are in their adult lives.
Sara Shamsabadi 10 months ago
have you recently hit your head??! That's the only acceptable excuse you'd be able to use to EVER speak to this crazy narcissist. She's supposed to be YOUR sister!! She sounds selfish, is gaslighting you badly & is deranged! I'd never speak to her again & feel justified by it. What type of family member is that?! I hope you get counseling & never hear from her again. Good luck & don't even consider going to the wedding, nor inviting her crazy a**
Katharina Sei. 10 months ago (edited)
Actions have consequences. Ideally, the perpetrators should also feel the consequences. Personally, I wouldn't go to the sister's wedding. I would apologize to her fiancé in advance and tell him what happened. (Of course, you can question why the well-being of a strange man is more important to her than that of her sister. ) I would also clearly communicate this information to close relatives/acquaintances who would be expecting me at the wedding. This way, the groom is forewarned and the relatives don't have to ask at the wedding. Whether this results in chaos or not is up to the family dynamics and is a consequence of her doing.
Susie Elle 10 months ago
She's jealous of your relationship with Mark. My gut feeling is that the sister has feelings for Mark and was hoping to break their relationship, then cancel her own wedding and run off with Mark. It's outrageous, but I'm willing to bet that's what's going on.
Gavin Johnson 10 months ago
Just over twenty years ago my brother got married, certain family members were definitely not invited, I actually had to keep an eye out for them prior to the ceremony as they’d threatened to turn up unannounced. They’d been nothing but toxic in the run up to the wedding. Thankfully they didn’t turn up and a good time was had by all, a few family members grumbled about traditions regarding family being put first and he’d caused aggravation by not inviting the toxic pair. Roll on twenty years, no one on our side of the family communicates with them, he and his wife started the end of all of our dealings with them and we are all better for it. Cut out the rotten and toxic individuals in your life, in time you’ll see how their negativity is best left behind.
Tyke 10 months ago
I'll never understand: Adult "Child" 1: does something to p*ss off Adult Child 2 which is also totally unacceptable and out of order. Adult Child 2 stands up for themself. Queue parents to Adult Child 2: no, you can't be upset you'll ruin the family. ADULT CHILD 1 ALREADY DID THAT. FFS.
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