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219
Woman Withholds Her Baby From Mom And Sister After They Disappointed Her While She Was In Labor
Giving birth to a baby is no joke. Hormones can wreak havoc on a woman’s body during labor, so it’s normal that they might not react adequately to some situations. This mom-to-be got mad at her sister and mother for not taking care of her puppy properly.
The author was ready to chalk it up to labor hormones and forgive her sister. But when she brought up her hurt feelings after the birth, she was again met with anger and threats she wouldn’t be allowed to see the baby. So, she asked people online: was she wrong to want her feelings acknowledged?
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When this woman went into labor, she asked her sister to look after her puppy
Image credits: DC_Studio / Envato (not the actual photo)
But after the sister failed to care for the dog “properly,” the new mom had some harsh words for her
Image credits: katemangostar / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Traditional_Honey19
Ideally, dogs should only wear a harness outside
Image credits: Image by Freepik (not the actual photo)
The catalyst for the fight between sisters seems to be that the author didn’t take care of the puppy properly; she didn’t remove the dog’s harness after they got back home from a walk. As she noted in one comment, “There is nothing medically or safety-wise special about this harness, just that due to her being a smaller dog she can get uncomfortable being in it for long periods of time.”
Experts say that harnesses are only suited for outdoor wear. Many dog owners prefer them over collars because there’s less potential for injuries. Any collar that goes around a dog’s throat can damage the trachea, esophagus, and even the thyroid.
According to the outdoor gear for dogs specialist at Arctic Sammy, owners shouldn’t leave dogs with their harnesses on all the time. When a dog wears a harness 24/7, they might develop several skin issues: chafing, rubbing, sores, hair loss, and matted fur. Not to mention that the harness might get caught or stuck on something.
When a dog wears their harness indoors for prolonged periods of time, they may also start associating it with discomfort. If they wear the harness for long, they will inevitably start feeling discomfort and skin irritation, and this might undo the positive progress owners strive for during training.
Pet rescue advocate and pet chef Rocky Kanaka agrees that people shouldn’t leave harnesses on their dogs 24/7. “When you are at home and your dog is not in walk or work mode, it’s best to let them relax and be harness-free. Overuse of a harness can negate the positive association with the training you have done with the harness, and it can impede their physical safety and comfort at home.”
A woman in labor should hear words of encouragement and not worry about things not related to the birth
Image credits: pch.vector / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Giving birth is hard work, no wonder they call it ‘labor.’ What people say to a person in labor matters. Healthcare experts say that women need to be as relaxed as possible, as that can lessen the physical pain and the emotional distress of labor.
There’s a myriad of emotions women feel during birth. The physical sensations include pain, fatigue, nausea, and pressure. So, it’s only natural that women might feel anxious, afraid, calm, anticipation, great joy, and exhaustion.
The things people should be saying to a woman in labor should be words of encouragement. Of course, pain-relieving measures and medication can make the birth more comfortable, but supportive talk can be just as important.
So, it’s quite strange that the woman’s partner chose this time to tell her about how her sister failed to take a harness off their dog. It might make one wonder whether that’s really a priority while a child is being born. Whether she’s in the first or the third stage of labor, the woman should be thinking about seeing her baby, not what her dog is doing.
“The most important thing is being kind and offering support,” Robin Elise Weiss, PhD, MPH, writes. “Let the laboring person know they’re loved and that they can get through their marathon of labor. Stay upbeat and keep negative commentary or snarky remarks to yourself.”
The author clarified why she brought up her issues to the sister so soon after the birth
Most people believed the author was not at fault here, as hormones don’t explain such rude behavior
However, some thought that the OP didn’t have to push so soon, as her sister had just given birth
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What do you think ?
Sand Ers 1 year ago (edited)
Once again, the YTAs have their heads up their own donkeys. The sister is hyper controlling, and the boyfriend sounds like a díck. OP did nothing whatsoever wrong, regarding both the puppy being in the harness for a few extra minutes and asking for an apology and acknowledgement of her own feelings. I’ve had small dogs for 16 years. We use a harness when walking them to avoid them being choked by a collar. A few extra minutes in one is absolutely nothing. Sister went berserk over something that was literally nothing. I really feel for the child who is going to be raised by a lunatic.
CanadianDimes 1 year ago
Especially the one that said she was pouting about it days later. It was *the same day* and OP raised her concerns when the sis asked what was wrong.
Load More Replies...
Alexandra Hall 1 year ago
This is SO WEIRD. Why on earth is the father setting the new Mum off for a complete non-issue? We had premature twins and were grateful just to have healthy babies. Wtf is this baby daddy causing problems? He’s off his nut. If we’d had a pet at the time (we didn’t- ps- it’s SUPER STRANGE to get a PUPPY when you’re expecting a baby, period.) we would have left it completely up to whomever was willing to look after it for us. Fleck’s sake. What is wrong with people?
Kkg 1 year ago
It's not normal to threaten to separate the family from a baby because of some stupid thing, that wasn't even remotely dangerous to the dog. Also the boyfriend is an AH. He probably knew how she would react. Or she screams at him on regular basis because of this harness, and he was happy to point out that he's not the only one making this mistake. In any case- if this behavior is typical for the sister, she should get some help. Otherwise everyone should just let it go and blame the stress and hormones.
Alexandra 1 year ago
So OP has 'to earn her sister's trust back'. Pray tell me how exactly is she supposed to do that? Did you tell her? And why should she earn your trust if she did nothing wrong in the first place? Or do you just want her to do what you want? I think OP should let things rest and wait until she's asked to babysit either the puppy or the baby.
Yu Pan 1 year ago
Not meeting niblings aren't really that big of a deal, to me, at least. If I were op, I'd shrug and say, okay fine. I only feel bad for op's mom because parents like to meet grandkids somehow. Shrug.
Mike F 1 year ago
She'll come around when she's looking for a free babysitter cause she needs a break! Wonder how the crow will taste then?
Load More Replies...
René Sauer 1 year ago
"Oh, what´s that, dear sister of mine? You are asking if I am willing to babysit your child? But I am too lazy and irresponsible to care for your dog, so what makes you think I could do better with the child?"
Kaeda 1 year ago
...oh my goodness. 🤦♀️ I had two kids naturally and without pain medication (not saying this as a one-up, I swear... just trying to give context to understanding the overall pain of labor). Not once did I yell at anyone nor did I threaten to withhold my newborn children from them. Hormones and the pain can be crazy, yes, but it doesn't make you psychotic.
Pittsburgh rare 1 year ago
My ex sworn l called him son of a b***h during labour, which I honestly don't remember, but if I did it was totally justified and merely descriptive.
Load More Replies...
Bartlet for World Domination 1 year ago
I keep wondering what happened to the puppy after 2 AM.
Fox with a Dragon Tattoo 1 year ago
The YTA people are always such shameless trash lol. The older sister sounds like a straight up garbage person. And no thats NOT what being a perfectionist is, thats being a Karen. Full stop. Id say ghost her, tell her until.she grows up, you have no time for childish angry people who definitely arent good or emotionally mature enough to have a kid. Also. F**k the boyfriend. Human sewage.
CBolt 1 year ago
Thank you for pointing out that a perfectionist isn't the same thing as somebody who wants what she wants, the way she wants it, everybody else is expected to follow her every whim - just because that's the way she wants it. Sister's family seems to have bought into this selfish, self-centered behavior as if it's a positive attribute.
Load More Replies... Sand Ers 1 year ago (edited)
Once again, the YTAs have their heads up their own donkeys. The sister is hyper controlling, and the boyfriend sounds like a díck. OP did nothing whatsoever wrong, regarding both the puppy being in the harness for a few extra minutes and asking for an apology and acknowledgement of her own feelings. I’ve had small dogs for 16 years. We use a harness when walking them to avoid them being choked by a collar. A few extra minutes in one is absolutely nothing. Sister went berserk over something that was literally nothing. I really feel for the child who is going to be raised by a lunatic.
CanadianDimes 1 year ago
Especially the one that said she was pouting about it days later. It was *the same day* and OP raised her concerns when the sis asked what was wrong.
Load More Replies... Alexandra Hall 1 year ago
This is SO WEIRD. Why on earth is the father setting the new Mum off for a complete non-issue? We had premature twins and were grateful just to have healthy babies. Wtf is this baby daddy causing problems? He’s off his nut. If we’d had a pet at the time (we didn’t- ps- it’s SUPER STRANGE to get a PUPPY when you’re expecting a baby, period.) we would have left it completely up to whomever was willing to look after it for us. Fleck’s sake. What is wrong with people?
Kkg 1 year ago
It's not normal to threaten to separate the family from a baby because of some stupid thing, that wasn't even remotely dangerous to the dog. Also the boyfriend is an AH. He probably knew how she would react. Or she screams at him on regular basis because of this harness, and he was happy to point out that he's not the only one making this mistake. In any case- if this behavior is typical for the sister, she should get some help. Otherwise everyone should just let it go and blame the stress and hormones.
Alexandra 1 year ago
So OP has 'to earn her sister's trust back'. Pray tell me how exactly is she supposed to do that? Did you tell her? And why should she earn your trust if she did nothing wrong in the first place? Or do you just want her to do what you want? I think OP should let things rest and wait until she's asked to babysit either the puppy or the baby.
Yu Pan 1 year ago
Not meeting niblings aren't really that big of a deal, to me, at least. If I were op, I'd shrug and say, okay fine. I only feel bad for op's mom because parents like to meet grandkids somehow. Shrug.
Mike F 1 year ago
She'll come around when she's looking for a free babysitter cause she needs a break! Wonder how the crow will taste then?
Load More Replies... René Sauer 1 year ago
"Oh, what´s that, dear sister of mine? You are asking if I am willing to babysit your child? But I am too lazy and irresponsible to care for your dog, so what makes you think I could do better with the child?"
Kaeda 1 year ago
...oh my goodness. 🤦♀️ I had two kids naturally and without pain medication (not saying this as a one-up, I swear... just trying to give context to understanding the overall pain of labor). Not once did I yell at anyone nor did I threaten to withhold my newborn children from them. Hormones and the pain can be crazy, yes, but it doesn't make you psychotic.
Pittsburgh rare 1 year ago
My ex sworn l called him son of a b***h during labour, which I honestly don't remember, but if I did it was totally justified and merely descriptive.
Load More Replies... Bartlet for World Domination 1 year ago
I keep wondering what happened to the puppy after 2 AM.
Fox with a Dragon Tattoo 1 year ago
The YTA people are always such shameless trash lol. The older sister sounds like a straight up garbage person. And no thats NOT what being a perfectionist is, thats being a Karen. Full stop. Id say ghost her, tell her until.she grows up, you have no time for childish angry people who definitely arent good or emotionally mature enough to have a kid. Also. F**k the boyfriend. Human sewage.
CBolt 1 year ago
Thank you for pointing out that a perfectionist isn't the same thing as somebody who wants what she wants, the way she wants it, everybody else is expected to follow her every whim - just because that's the way she wants it. Sister's family seems to have bought into this selfish, self-centered behavior as if it's a positive attribute.
Load More Replies... You May Like "He's Had This Name For A Decade?": Sister Wants To Name Her Son, Freaks Out Over Family Cat 21YO Fed Up With Being Disrespected By Older Sis, Stops Babysitting For Her For Free, She’s Livid Dad Robs Daughter Of Her Teenage Years By Forcing Her To Babysit, She Breaks The News To Him
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