The Facebook group Single Mom Is Not a Coupon Code has only been around since June 2022, yet it has already amassed over 105k members. It’s quite an active community as well, as there have been 15 new posts today, and 250 new members have joined in the past week. And while you might be thinking that this group is harmful to single parents, as it does shame some, it doesn’t call out anyone who didn’t already make unreasonable requests online.

The group also requires that anyone mentioned in a post must be kept anonymous, so nobody can be doxed or harassed online. From asking for car insurance payments to demanding that others help them put food on the table, there is no end to what parents will ask for online. And while community aid can be a powerful tool for those in need, it’s important to go about asking for help the right way. If you just bought a new car, and now you’re complaining about not being able to feed your kiddos, your priorities might not be in the right order. 

To learn more about this group and how it started in the first place, we got in touch with Admin Mathieu Mall, who was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda.

"This group comes from a joke between colleagues at work," he shared. "A female colleague who had become single started to ask us for more and more expensive services, like repairing parts of her car or giving her our old freezer, etc. The group was just a 'joke' between us, but as time went by, I saw that it was common on social networks to make similar requests."

Mathieu added that he doesn't often see this behavior in France, but he's noticed these kinds of posts becoming more and more common online. And because there are so many funny posts being shared in the group, he has a hard time choosing a favorite.

But the administrator did want to make it clear that he has mixed feelings about the group, noting that he understands where these parents are coming from. "I don't hate single women or those who call for help on the internet," he told Bored Panda. "I think it's a desperate act motivated by a real need: to survive. I'm no one to advise people on how they should lead their lives, or how to survive it. I think in their place I'd do the same if it really worked," he admitted.

Mathieu went on to note that although there's a funny side to this group, there's also a dark side to it that he takes very seriously. "It's a breeding ground for racists and people with various problems," he noted. "The consequences are often nasty, such as extreme stalking which has even led to someone losing their job. And it often happens that this kind of behavior is reported to me, or the harassment of a single person recognized via their post. I never tolerate this kind of behavior, and it's banned directly."

"By the way, this group would be nothing without the wonderful co-admin: Cayla Hrycyschyn," Mathieu added. "Yes, the group is mainly run by a single woman! She's the one who administers almost everything and keeps the group alive. Thanks Cayla!"

According to the Pew Research Center, the United States has the highest rate of kids living in single-parent households in the world. Nearly a quarter of kids in the US live with only one parent, while globally, only about 7% of children do. After the US, the UK, São Tomé and Príncipe, Russia and Denmark have the next highest rates of single-parent households, Finances Online reports. 

And the vast majority of single parents who live with their kiddos are mothers. In the United States, there are nearly 15 million single moms taking care of their families, while there are only 6.5 million single fathers taking care of their kiddos. In fact, women between the ages of 35 to 39 have a 9% chance of being a single parent in the US, while men only have a 2% chance of being single parents. 

There’s no question that single parents face additional challenges that married or coupled moms and dads don’t have to worry about. According to Finances Online, 60% of poor children in the United States live in households with single moms. In fact, nearly a third of kids who live in families with unwed moms are in poverty, while only 15% of families with single dads are in the same boat. Single parents spend an average of 34% of their income on childcare in the US, while most families only need to spend around 10% of their income on childcare. 

Being a single parent can make it much more difficult to work 40 hours a week, to have time to prepare healthy meals for the family, to spend quality time with your little ones and to be able to ever relax and unwind by yourself. Growing up poor can also have a huge impact on children’s well being, and they might have experienced trauma through watching their parents divorce or losing a beloved parent from their life. Whether a parent passed away, left by choice, was arrested, etc., their absence can have a huge impact on their children.

Because single parents and children of single-parent households face so much adversity, the Annie E. Casey Foundation is dedicated to providing resources to make their lives easier. This foundation is focused on strengthening financial safety net programs and providing affordable housing for families, ensuring that education is affordable and accessible for all children, maximizing two-generation community development strategies to help kids and their future families, offering support for kids and families who have experienced trauma and supporting the needs of young parents. 

According to Marriage.com, some of the biggest hurdles single parents face are loneliness, navigating disciplining their children, dealing with low self-esteem, feeling a sense of guilt and navigating the financial burden of raising kids alone. But thankfully, there are a few solutions that can make parents’ lives slightly easier. When it comes to dealing with loneliness, Marriage.com recommends replacing negative thoughts with positive thinking. 

“Redirect your energy to more productive activities. If you are in the custody of the children, then spend time with them. Remember, they look up to you for their emotional needs,” they note. “Similarly, the partner with no children must go the extra mile to socialize and engage in community activities to pass the time rather than wallow in pity.”

When it comes to disciplining kids as a single parent, Marriage.com recommends regularly touching base with the other parent, if they’re still in the picture, to ensure that you both instill the same rules in your kids. If you’re the only parent around, it might be wise to reach out to close friends or family members who can help ensure that your rules and morals are understood by your kiddos. If you’re struggling with low self-esteem, don’t be afraid to reach out to parents in similar situations or a therapist who can help you build confidence.   

If you’re struggling with guilt as a single parent, remember that this is not productive. Do not blame yourself for the situation you’re in, and remember that you have to be there for your kiddos. You’re doing the best you can, and there’s no such thing as a perfect parent, anyway. 

And when it comes to the financial burden of raising kids, don’t be afraid to explain to your little ones that money is tight. But assure them that you’re all safe and that they have nothing to worry about. Making ends meet will take some extra sacrifices as a single parent, but it will be worth it to raise happy, healthy children who always know they’re loved.

Whether you’re a single parent or not, we sincerely hope that you have everything you need to take care of your family, pandas. But if you don’t, we hope you know there are better ways to get what you need than by simply posting on Facebook. Keep upvoting the pics you find particularly entitled, and if you’d like to check out even more photos like this, you can find Bored Panda’s last article featuring Single Mom Is Not a Coupon Code right here!