“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers)

Our brains have this wonderful way of making everything seem so much easier when we aren’t staring it right in the face. After all, it’s pretty easy to think about just how productive you’ll be tomorrow while laying in bed. But as time has shown, a lot of life is more complicated than it looks.
Someone asked “What do most people think that is simple to deal with but is actually not?” and people from across the internet shared their best examples. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to share your own ideas in the comments section below.

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“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Leaving abusive people. Its not just getting out a door. Its far more than that.

mizukata , cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

125points

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whodunnitfan2013 2 months ago

Abusers purposefully prevent their victims from leaving. They monitor them and their electronic activities, don't let them leave the house, steal their money, and even convince them they're not even being abused, etc.

37points

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“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) People who manage their weight easily have no conception how difficult it is for those who can't.

Zomburai , Andres Ayrton / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

124points

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Lou Cam 2 months ago

Two people can follow the same diet and exercise regime and have completely different body weights and health outcomes. It's almost like we're all genetically different people isn't it?

20points

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“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) The death of a pet. They're not like toys, they're family and their loss is felt accordingly.

Yereli , sarandy westfall / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

118points

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keyboardtek 2 months ago

Pets do not criticize or judge you. They are often much better than humans to be with.

35points

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“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Managing mental health, a lot of people think it's just about being positive, but it's way more complex and requires real effort and support.

driftwinkel47 , https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-sitting-on-gray-rock-near-body-of-water-185801/ / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

100points

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V 2 months ago

And sometimes medication. And that's ok.

46points

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“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Poverty.

There is this mentality "well, if you just pulled yourself up by your bootstraps" or "look! XYZ person is no longer poor, you can do it!"

What they fail to recognize is that poverty can be an inherited condition causing subsequent generations to not be able to escape it. Caused by, amongst other factors, self-reinforcing mechanisms that once it exists, persists unless there is outside intervention.

And yes, those people who have "pulled themselves up by their bootstraps" nine times out of ten had some form of assistance, regardless of what narrative is spun.

QuantumSasuage , Timur Weber / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

89points

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CK 2 months ago

It is physically impossible to pull oneself up by one's bootstraps, and the original meaning of this expression was the opposite, to describe someone's rags to riches journey (or other accomplishment) as a miraculous feat.

38points

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“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Dealing with an aging parent especially when dementia or cognitive decline is involved. It doesn’t happen all at once so that all of a sudden everyone just agrees “yep they are legally incompetent.” It’s more like years of worry on behalf of the kids, hurt feelings and denial on behalf of the parent, trying to strategize how to get help from doctors and lawyers when the parent is resistant to help, trying to figure out what is the “last straw,” who can help the parent in what ways, ugh. It’s tough with no clear game plan on what to do.

917caitlin , JIUN-JE LIN / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

89points

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BewilderedBanana 2 months ago

You cannot truly appreciate this until you have to go through it :( I also used to think that it would be so "obvious" that it's happening, and everyone (including the parents) would understand they need help. It's so far from that... it's gradual and they do not completely realise what's going on - it's very difficult to convince them they need help, especially coz you don't want to risk hurting their feelings, or making things worse. We seem to be getting there though, so fingers crossed

25points

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“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Anxiety. People who don't suffer from it think you're overreacting about most things and controlling your thoughts and responses is a walk in the park. Don't you think if I could mute the panic button, I would? I mean...

HiVi48 , RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

86points

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BewilderedBanana 2 months ago

Another of those things you will never understand until you go through it yourself. All the "you just need to be positive" and "just stop thinking those thoughts" and "oh but you just need to stay calm" advice coming from everyone makes it worse

16points

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“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Toxic parents. People think it's easy to just cut off bad parents and never speak to them again, but it's so difficult.

They're bad to you, but then you think about the times they weren't so bad. And they're still not so bad sometimes, so you think maybe you can have the relationship with them you want. But then they're awful to you again, and you wonder why you bother. But then...

My therapist, my tattoo artist, and I are all working on it together. Lol!

EducatedOwlAthena , Kindel Media / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

83points

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Kristal 2 months ago

Not to mention pressure from other family members to not cut contact cause "they are your parent(s)!" "You only have one!" "They are family and family sticks together" blah blah blah

17points

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“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Pain. So many people think or even say “Just power through it” because they can power through a mild headache or something. Yeah, I’ll just POWER THROUGH my TRIGEMINAL NEURALGIA, one of the top two most painful conditions in the world, also called a “s***ide” condition because it can cause people to shuffle off this mortal coil from pain. (I’m ok now, folks! I found a med that helps but for DECADES I just… dealt with it, curled up in a crying ball on my couch.).

GelflingMama , Andrea Piacquadio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

80points

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BewilderedBanana 2 months ago

Everyone's pain threshold is different. Something that feels mild to one person might feel excruciating to someone else. "Power through it" is some of the worst advice you can give anyone in any form of suffering, both physical or mental. Seek help now.

30points

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#10

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Low level depression. Just because someone isn't crying all the time and appears to be functional such as getting dressed, eating and working, doesn't mean it's easy and one is close to "snapping out of it".

It can take a huge amount of effort and internal monologue to simply get oneself out of bed every morning to "do it again".

VentingID10t , Arif Riyanto / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

80points

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BewilderedBanana 2 months ago (edited)

No one, who hasn't been through it, will ever understand this. Also, people who cry aren't necessarily depressed and vice versa. With depression you can lose all your sense of emotions. You don't feel happy or sad, you're just existing - and, in many cases, just hoping for this existence to end. You don't even have the will or motivation to do something about that, until it gets much worse. Everything, from getting out of bed, work, even basic things like eating and showering require MASSIVE effort, and "snapping out of it" isn't ever an option

29points

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#11

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Teaching. Every Tom, D**k, and Harry thinks that because they were once students they know how it should be done.

For non-educators, think about the last time you had to give a presentation. Think about how much time and preparation it took. Think about how nervous you were.

Now imagine you have to do 6 of those. Every day.

Now, add to that a requirement that you have to get every audience member to participate in very specific and structured ways and develop skills while retaining new knowledge.

And a solid half of them don’t want to do that or even be there.

And you have to plan all of that, every day, with 1/5 of the time required to plan for it.

And you have to evaluate each audience member’s growth. And you have anywhere from 20 to 200 audience members.

And an external authority is going to give your audience members a test to see how well you did.

And you might get shot.

And Sean Hannity and Tucker Carlson think you’re trying to turn kids into gay, America-hating communists who hate white people.

HookItLeft , LexScope / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

74points

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Pandarosa 2 months ago

Hear, hear! (Minus the guns, Hannity and Carlson, I'm not from the US)

19points

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#12

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Keeping plants alive: Water, sunlight, sounds easy, but somehow I ended up with a graveyard of botanic victims.

ShyByteSample , Cassidy Phillips / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

73points

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Doozle bug 2 months ago

What is this amazing jug

24points

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#13

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Honestly just working 40 hours a week and trying to be fully present for your family. I'm married, and I have no idea how single parents are doing hanging in there. Big props to single parents!

Bipdisqs , https://unsplash.com/photos/woman-browsing-on-the-internet-g9KFpAfQ5bc / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

72points

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Magenta Blu 2 months ago

There is no such thing as fully home presence if you have to work

2points

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#14

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) All the s**t you have to do after someone dies.

ResponsibleSurfing , Pavel Danilyuk / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

68points

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Alexandra 2 months ago

Depends on who dies. When my mother died, it took me about 6 months to arrange everyting: her funeral, her inheritance, emptying the house and disposing of her things, terminating her insurance, utilities, subscriptions, getting a headstone.

9points

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#15

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Man, quitting smoking was a real eye-opener for me. I always thought it'd be a piece of cake, you know? Just toss the cigs and boom, done. Ha! What a joke. When I tried to quit last year, it hit me like a truck. The cravings were insane, but the worst part? My head was all over the place. I'd snap at my buddies for no reason, couldn't focus on jack at work. Everyone's like, "Dude, just stop buying them." If only it was that simple! Took me ages, a ton of patches, and some group therapy sessions to finally kick it. Now I get why people struggle so much with this stuff.

Real_Hat_7932 , Markus Spiske / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

67points

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Ivo H 2 months ago

These fu*king poison-tubes should be forbidden for a long time.

17points

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#16

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Looking after your Grandchild for a full day. You love them death, but you're a good 25-30 years removed from watching after another human being and it can wipe you out. Seems easy - just watch a movie or two and take a nap. Nope. It can be like hanging out with a speed freak with no off button.

The68Guns , Johnny Cohen / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

66points

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Deirdre M 2 months ago

Oof. I agree wholeheartedly with this one. I am 66 and care for my 7 month old twin grandchildren 2 or 3 days a week while my daughter works. It is unbelievably hard.

16points

Paul Brown 2 months ago

My 6 yo grandson lives with me. I'm 68yo. I'm the only male figure in his life so when we're at home together he's attached to me at the hip. I love him so much, but it is really hard on me when I get home from work and he says "PopPop, will you play with me?" And, I have to get on the floor with him. And that hurts!!

5points

She who must not be named 2 months ago

This is so heartwarming. I'm sorry it hurts and is hard but the fact you still do it speaks volumes for the sort of person you are, and the little man your grandson will grow up to be after having a positive male role model in his life.

2points

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Boopsie 2 months ago

OMG - the little girl who lives upstairs is a tornado on two legs!

4points

keyboardtek 2 months ago

Young children require round the clock surveillance for their safety. Do not become a parent unless this sounds like fun.

3points

StrangeOne 2 months ago

It doesn't last for long, at least.

2points

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StrangeOne 2 months ago

Toddlers and preschoolers are the worst. They get so hyper and it's exhausting watching them. Best thing to do is take them to a large, open field park. Lay down a blanket and blow some bubbles, give them a ball to kick around and let them explore the bugs in the grass, and figuring out what their bodies can do, like somersaults. Give yourself a time limit of how much you can take. I say 30 minutes to an hour is good. Take them for a little walk. Not pushing them around in anything. That's cumbersome to the adult. Let them walk. Play games of I Spy. Bring them home for some hot chocolate and sit them on the couch with some books. I find movies can get kids a bit riled up. Especially if there's an upsetting scene or something exciting.

2points

KnightOwl 2 months ago

My 60yr old parents had 8 kids all born roughly a Yr apart, raising us was extremely chaotic and exhausting. However they now have custody of my 6yr old nephew who has autism, ADHD and some brain damage due to a combination of foetal alcohol syndrome and the d***s his mum took throughout her pregnancy, he's also an autistic savant and highly intelligent, making caring for him very complex, scary and exhausting. They openly admit that raising him alone is more difficult than raising all 8 of their kids at the same time. Part of it is down to their age but also because he has a lot of additional needs and cannot sit still, he literally never stops moving, he literally runs circles around them. He constantly tries to run away/escape, he can pick locks and literally notices everything, he has no sense of danger and trusts everyone he meets all of which puts him in immense danger. I help out as much as I can but I honestly don't know how they do it, he's amazing but extremely exhausting!

0points

30ninjazinmybag 2 months ago

I agree I'm 42 and have a 2yr old granddaughter. Had her today and going to be now I'm shattered love her to death though.

-1point

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#17

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Hearing loss. Hearing aids help . You will always deal with auditory processing issues especially in a situation where multiple people are talking. I wish personal subtitles or conversation bubbles were a real thing.

karknc , Mark Paton / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

65points

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Jane Jayne Jain Jeign Jein 2 months ago

I wish everyone was taught sign language in school: the deaf community would not be so marginalised and most people would benefit as they get older. Also tonnes of noisy situations where sign language would be really useful.

20points

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#18

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) People think to stop crime you just put more police officers out on the street, when the true method of stopping crime is making sure the public's material conditions are met. That means higher wages for the working class so they can afford goods and services. Child care availability for their children and community centers where young kids and teens can participate in positive activities. All these social safety programs hinder profits, so cities and states would rather just put more cops out there to harass innocent people for minor offenses.

futanari_kaisa , ev / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

57points

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Michael Largey 2 months ago

The costliest and most damaging crimes don't happen on the streets - they happen in corporate offices. And often completely legally.

37points

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#19

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Periods. Everyone is different, but for some, periods are debilitating. Awful pain, messes with your stomach, creates soreness, slowness, fatigue for days. And more than just being irritable, some of us have full-on temper issues and then gloomy melancholia for the week/s leading up to it. But then some men want to make the joke that "she's probably on her period." Yeah. My body is shedding itself. It sucks.

staycandid , Andrea Piacquadio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

56points

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V 2 months ago

Even standard periods. You are bleeding for 5-7 days, it is not fun for anyone. Then you have the people who have irregular periods, who if they are sexually active have to wonder if they are pregnant a lot.

24points

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#20

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Having a chronic illness. Like obviously yoga and meditation will fix me! /s.

k28c9 , Anna Shvets / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

56points

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Sue User 2 months ago

I have peripheal neuropathy due to autoummune. I cannot feel parts of feet and hands. I struggle with exercise. So many people tell me " try yoga". Man, i can barely stand on two legs and cannot get up from kneeling without a chair.

10points

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#21

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Getting a good night's sleep seems straightforward, but balancing stress, screen time, and a busy schedule makes it much more complex than people realize.

barelylegalt33n , Gregory Pappas / unspalsh (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

53points

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Jane Jayne Jain Jeign Jein 2 months ago

In the UK the legal minimum time between shifts for HGV drivers is 9 hours, and for bus drivers it's 8 1/2 hours - that time includes commuting home, fixing super, relaxing, sleeping, getting up & washed, fixing breakfast & commuting back to work. Yet when accidents happen because a professional driver is tired it's never the fault of the scheduler or the exploitative boss or the lawmakers who allow this nonsense.

11points

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#22

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Breastfeeding. It’s supposed to be natural right? Like, every woman who gives birth can obviously breast feed. Not so much….

New-Illustrator5114 , Hanna Balan / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

52points

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Guy Bare 2 months ago

When I got pregnant I was absolutely convinced that I would never ever breastfeed my baby. I thought of it as "disgusting". Ended up breastfeeding 2 years and 16 months my babies. And I understood why I didn't have any exemples around me of women feeding their babies : people make you feel gross, they mock you and make everything so you feel Guilty for it (like "Because of you he will be fat/gay/unhealthy !"). Wow. I had to fight against the difficulty of giving birth, then to fight for the pain of breastfeeding, then for the baby to feed correctly AND to fight my own relatives and their unwelcomed commente. I should have got a medal for continuing it so long and also for just trying it at first. And I also give hugs and support to every mums on earth, breastfeeding or not.

19points

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#23

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Menopause! 😓😫🥱😤😡🤬.

CatSlag , RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

52points

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Helena 2 months ago

I both look forward to and fear menopause

18points

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#24

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Getting out of bed.

BilliePannkaka , Ivan Oboleninov / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

48points

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Magenta Blu 2 months ago

THIS. Every day is more difficult than the previous one

9points

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#25

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) People often think sticking to a diet is simple, but it's actually really tough.

Altruistic-Court4804 , Cats Coming / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

45points

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Magenta Blu 2 months ago

And incredible expensive

3points

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#26

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) If you have social anxiety introducing yourself to somebody.

Deaf_Cam , Liza Summer / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

44points

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Papa 2 months ago

I don't have any trouble introducing myself to someone,. The trouble starts when I try to remember his or her name two minutes later.

18points

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#27

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Communicating effectively appears easy, but truly understanding others, expressing oneself clearly, and avoiding misunderstandings requires a lot of practice and patience.

MishaShantay , Eliott Reyna / unsplash (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

44points

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keyboardtek 2 months ago

Learning the blocks to listening is very useful. My main block is that I am thinking of my response to the first thing someone says and missing the second half of their statement.

7points

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#28

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Managing mental health. It seems so simple, til suddenly you get anxious or depressed or stressed out. Or you don't even realize how bad it's gotten until you hear yourself saying something that you ordinarily don't say.

My_Space_page , cottonbro studio / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

42points

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BewilderedBanana 2 months ago

More awareness about mental health issues is needed, i think. People have no idea what it's like before they have to go through it and, once they do, most do not know when or how to find help.

10points

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#29

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Sticking to a budget. A simple concept in theory, and yes, poor planning and poor money management definitely exists for a lot of people. But “live within your means” used to mean “do without multiple vacations a year and cut down on frivolous spending.” Now, there’s a fundamental misunderstanding of the problem. People nowadays are not going broke trying to buy brand new nice shiny cars, or winter in the Bahamas; they’re just trying to scrape by in an economy where wages have not caught up to the cost of living. And in the US, a chronic medical condition or one unexpected hospital stay can ruin you financially for years. So, budgeting and financial planning, both relatively simple concepts on paper, become much more complex in practice when your very basic necessities exceed your income, and you keep hearing “well, just spend less.”.

Square-Raspberry560 , Karolina Kaboompics / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

42points

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Derek Miranda 2 months ago

We aren't budgeting and saving for a vacation. It is for the upcoming cost of an unpredictable hospital visit or car repair.

15points

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#30

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers) Managing personal finances often seems simple but can be surprisingly complex.

FrostyFox_98 , Mohamed hamdi / pexels (not the actual photo) Report

Final score:

33points

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BewilderedBanana 2 months ago

Most of the time i don't have any finances to begin with :)

7points

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What do most people think that is simple to deal with but is actually not?

Apartment hunting. You fill out an application and then the agency wants a deposit while they deliberate if they'll accept you. While you're waiting, you'll want to look at and apply for other apartments, not knowing if you'll get accepted, and you won't know until you send in the application with deposit. But wait... You only have so much money, bills need to get paid, you need to eat and get yourself to work and you have hundreds on hold and may take a month before it's given back to you. And the clock is ticking towards the deadline. You may need a cosigner. Great, now who's willing to do that for you?

Sophia Athene 2 months ago (edited)

And you have to pay a background check fee and an application fee (not a deposit but fees even if you don't rent from them or they turn you down). At the time of signing, if you're lucky to get the apartment, you owe 1st and last months' rent along with a non-refundable cleaning and repairs deposit of several hundreds of $$$ and another non-refundable pet deposit of hundreds of $$$ if you have a pet small enough to meet their requirements.

1point

Liz The Biz 2 months ago

Coping with an elderly incontinent pet dog. People say, "Oh it's just a bit of pee." No it's not. In reality it is a 24/7 job. It is endless washing and drying of bedding, shampooing carpets, bathing and cleaning up the dog, and the smell that permeates everything and does not go away no matter how many air freshners or scented candles you use. There's no day off and you can't go away on holiday because nobody wants to look after an incontinent dog.

Elvira394 2 months ago

First list I've read that every single one was spot on. Probably could go to 100 answers and still be.

“What Do Most People Think Is Simple To Deal With But Is Actually Not?” (30 Answers)

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