Biologically it's possible to indicate the approximate age when a person reaches full physical maturity. However, emotional maturity is more challenging to define or distinguish. While physical and emotional maturity are subjective, typically, a person reaches physical maturity before becoming emotionally mature. For example, it's likely that a teenager would be physically mature but not emotionally mature enough to become a parent.
In fact, one study showed that the average man doesn't reach full emotional maturity until age 43, while women mature by age 32. That's an 11-year difference! Yet, again, the topic is very subjective. And while there are no tools (yet) available to determine the exact age one becomes 'ripe,' there are so-called signs of maturity. Similarly to how psychological conditions are diagnosed via symptoms, so can full psychological maturation be determined by signs of emotional maturity.
While signs of maturity in a man and woman may differ, gendering signs of maturity is irrelevant. So what exactly are those cues that a person has reached full emotional growth? When a Reddit user came in with the same question, numerous people chimed in in a Reddit thread sharing their personal experiences and the various signs of a mature man or woman.
Below, we've gathered some of their most upvoted answers sharing signs of a mature person. Do you agree with any of these statements? Which behavior or state of mind would you consider a sign of maturity? At what stage of emotional maturity would you consider yourself to be right now? Let us know!
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"When you realize 5k is a lot of money to spend, but not a lot of money to have."
"When you have an opinion on something and once presented with new facts you are open to changing your opinion."
"Letting someone win an argument so you can move on."
"Knowing when your night is over and you should probably go home."
"Realizing you're not as smart as you think."
People who think they know everything really annoy those of us who do. (Joke)
"Patience. Understanding that not everything can be fixed immediately, and making peace with the fact that some things just take time."
"I was always told 'character is how you treat those who can do nothing for you', which to me sounds like a good standard for maturity."
"Being able to admit when your worst enemy has a good idea."
"Knowing which priorities to put first."
+ Knowing that sometimes the priorities of others are more important than your own.
"When you consistently do the right thing for the right reasons - even if it involves sacrifice on your part."
"I've heard this one and it has stuck with me: 'When your mom comes to you for advice.'"
This is true. I go to my oldest kid for advice because she's, well, mature 👍
"When someone hurts you and you try to understand them."
Yes, understand them. But just because I understand why you are angry doesn't mean I accept you yelling at or abusing me. Remember, understanding is not excusing anymore than forgiving is forgetting. Understanding can reduce resentment as well as make things better in the future for everyone.
"Not caring about how you look to others so long as you like yourself and are having a good time."
"You become an adolescent when you realize your parents are human beings just like everyone else. You become an adult when you forgive them for it."
"Eating a sandwich using the heel of the loaf of bread."
"Sometimes it's better for an argument to never happen than for you to win it."
"Fully understanding that there are many different ways of looking at a problem and that not everyone will understand that."
"Being happy and proud for the successful people in your life without comparing yourself to them and at the same time being proud of your your own life."
"Being able to make a sincere apology. 'I'm sorry you took it that way' is not a sincere apology."
Not sure if I believe this one. Sometimes people misunderstand what you say. Instead of just being a jerk .... being able to let a person know you never meant it that way ...
"Not venting on social media about personal affairs."
"Not having the urge to laugh when the ketchup bottle farts."
"I don't need to tell people they're doing something wrong unless they ask me for my advice. I still often find myself biting my lip trying not to correct someone but I'm learning!"
There's nothing wrong with correcting someone, it's all about how you present it and how you deal with their reaction.
"Not getting embarrassed about necessary purchases. As a teenager and young woman, I got antsy purchasing tampons, picking up my birth control and even buying toilet paper."
Ahh ... the days when made sure you had a female cashier to ring you up. Later in life, you get in line with the male cashier and have tampons, wine, and a pound of chocolate. Looking at him ... daring him to make a comment.
"Ohh, the weather is finally warm and sunny, what a good day to do laundry."
I love line-dried clothes. Clothes fluttering on my clothesline makes me happy for some reason.
"When you realize that just because something is for children, it doesn't mean it's childish."
"Knowing that you aren't entitled to anything in life, even your life."
Id say you're entitled to your life. Nobody should have the right to take that away from you. This is a very dark view of the world. It's the libertarian, pull yourself up by your own bootstraps, why should I pay for your kids education or healthcare, view of the world.
"When you announce you're going to have a baby and people are happy for you instead of saying, 'Oh, is everything okay?'"
"Drinking a few beers makes you wanna go to bed instead of partying."
"Being able to walk away when you should. Whether it be a confrontation, relationship or bad situation."
"I bought floss the other day."
"Eating things you don't like just because they're healthy."
You don't have to eat things you don't like just because they're healthy. It's more about NOT eating things that are unhealthy.
"I just asked for nice wools socks for my birthday, so there's that."
"When teenagers start annoying you."
"Being able to answer a question with 'I don't know', instead of making something up or just talking around the question to cover up a lack of knowledge."
"Empathy. When you finally learn to put yourself in someone else's shoes, you become a bit more humble."
"Appreciating the taste of prunes."
"Sometimes I wake up at 6 am. Just naturally. And instead of going back to sleep I get up and do dishes or something."
"When you answer e-mails just as quickly as you do texts."
"This is also a sign of maturity: recognizing your own flaws, owning up to them, and actively trying to work on them!"
"Not making excuses for a failure and owning it. It's amazing how many adults still haven't gotten this down."
"Being able to delay gratification and do something you really don't want to do. I think that's one of the biggest differences between maturity and immaturity."
"Being able to swallow your ego and apologize even if you don't necessarily think you've done anything wrong. 'I completely understand your point and sincerely apologize for the lapse in communication,' instead of 'Can't you read, I clearly said that.'"
"Not letting the dishes 'soak' over night."
"Someone is mature when they can brush off insults with a laugh and not hold any kind of grudge. Someone is mature when they are focused on BEING a good person, not LOOKING like a good person."
"I feel like it's when you realize you're not the center of the world and start doing things for others. Immature people have no concept of anything post their own noses. Mature people realize that there's a world full of millions, even billions, of people who could use help. Just the realization, to me, makes that person mature."
"Doing puzzle night on a Saturday night. Actually, having a puzzle night in general."
Yay I'm mature 🙋🏼♀️ at least in the puzzle department. Not the email department
"How about being able to focus on solving the problem, not on blaming the person who made it."
"Being able to recognize your own flaws, and then work on improving them. Accept people as they are and focus on yourself, overall just do everything in your power to be a better person."
"Also knowing when to rely on others. Swallowing your pride and allowing those that truly care for you to help."
"You don't have to admit you wrong, just admit that people understand things differently and in different ways."
Unless, of course, you ARE wrong. Maturity is the discernment to know when you're wrong, and when there are differences in understanding.
"There's a fine line between quitting and knowing nothing more can be gained. I think the maturity part comes in knifing and accepting the difference."
"Not taking things personally."
"In truth, when you start wanting to take care of people and not being revolved around yourself."
"Realizing that you don't have to dress a certain way, have a certain hairstyle or a tattoo to express your individuality."
"Keys. The more keys you have the more responsible you are."
"Most modern music starts to suck."
"When you fall asleep in the car and your parents don't carry you to bed. That's another hard blow from reality."
"When you no longer worry about acting mature."
"When your friends spend an evening discussing taxes."
"Realizing that going out to eat is a decent chunk of change for most people (especially older people), so you should always dress nice and be cordial at a lesser restaurant or a nice restaurant."
"This happened a few years ago. I saw a spider on the ground outside and I was about to kill it but then I realized there was no need to and this spider was a living thing so I let it be. To me, that was a big sign that I had matured."
"Smiling at babies."
When I smile at babies, it's because I'm formulating a recipe.
"Having the humility to avoid needlessly talking about your accomplishments simply because an opportunity to do so comes up in conversation. If I only find out how good you are at something through another person telling me, and you've never bragged about it to me, I'll be impressed."
"Booking your own dentist appointment."
My husband makes me book his ... I guess I'm the mature one in our relationship.
"Knowing that you're able to have ice cream for dinner but choosing a healthy, balanced meal instead."
"When you are presented with the option of the better choice or the better story, you decide to go with the better choice."
"When someone tells you things you already know, you don't have to say 'I know that already.'"
"When you start to like the outside of an Oreo better than the inside."
"Not talking about people behind their backs."
"Learning to appreciate and care for what you already have, not constantly strive for the next thing you want."
"Listening to discussions on the radio and deliberately tune in."
"My friend and I had a very adult moment when we had a 20 minute conversation about dish soap."
"Providing a cheese plate when hosting a party."
"Knowing when to be mature."
Shouldn't you always be mature. Wouldn't the true meaning be ... know when to be immature?
"Liking salad."
"Agreeing with the Dad instead of Ariel in 'The Little Mermaid.'"
"Knowing the difference between being serious and being mature."
"Acting with confidence doing something, especially in a leadership position, when you have no idea what to do."
"When you do laundry and you separate your dark and light colors."
"You become a more courteous driver."
I learned how to drive in Chicago. There are no courteous drivers there. 🤣🤣🤣
"Not getting upset when someone has the same outfit as you at a party."
"When 'You need to be more mature' isn't your first defense if things aren't going your way."
"White crystals on cheddar cheese or brown spots on banana. They're just ripe enough to consume."
"Being able to discuss menstruation (as a male). It was when I was able to ask my girlfriend confidently about it, after being an ignorant teen throughout secondary school, I realized it's really not that bad."
"Getting excited about buying a new washer and dryer."
Front loader or top loader .... I have to research ... Woo Hoo .. . New washer and dryer.