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Are you looking for terrible and completely useless life tips? Then you've come to the right place! Bored Panda has compiled a list of the crappiest advice ever.

Some of them come from a sub-Reddit called /r/ShittyLifeProTips, and while they won't actually help you to achieve much, they are at least useful when it comes to making us laugh. From using ketchup as a bookmark to saving yourself precious time by adding toothpaste to meals, these "pro" life tips are sure to put a smile on your face while completely failing to help you in any practical way. Don't forget to vote for your favorite!

P.S.: These tips are a joke and may be dangerous, don't try them yourself!

#1

Use A Toilet Seat To Put Your Plate On While Watching TV

Use A Toilet Seat To Put Your Plate On While Watching TV

Report

#2

Take A Selfie Through A Toilet Roll Tube And Pretend You're The Moon

Take A Selfie Through A Toilet Roll Tube And Pretend You're The Moon

CommunistCate Report

#3

Spray Your Headphones With Some "Johnson's No More Tangles" When They Are Tangled

Spray Your Headphones With Some "Johnson's No More Tangles" When They Are Tangled

Eeli100 Report

#4

Cut Your Tennis Balls In Half To Store Two More Balls In Each Can, Saving Space

Cut Your Tennis Balls In Half To Store Two More Balls In Each Can, Saving Space

fantafano Report

#5

Sneak A Chocolate Into American Movie Theatres With This Trick

Sneak A Chocolate Into American Movie Theatres With This Trick

Miko99 Report

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Sheralyn
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Eh. Looks like this might work in America. You guys can carry guns in some states right?

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#6

Use This Vest Protect Your Personal Space On The Subway

Use This Vest Protect Your Personal Space On The Subway

Siew Ming Cheng Report

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Rob LeBlanc
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wearing a surgical mask and occasionally coughing guarantees added personal space for my NYC subway rides. ;)

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#7

Use The Metal Part Of Your Seat Belt To Open Beers While Driving

Use The Metal Part Of Your Seat Belt To Open Beers While Driving

420B Report

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Amanda Panda
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Or buy the unattached ones in the other post, and just use those.

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#8

Magnify Your Phone's Screen By Putting It In A Glass Of Water

Magnify Your Phone's Screen By Putting It In A Glass Of Water

the_pr0fessor Report

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#9

Keep Cake Moist By Eating It All In One Sitting

Keep Cake Moist By Eating It All In One Sitting

Louniness Report

#10

Don't Buy New Socks. Use A Permanent Marker Instead

Don't Buy New Socks. Use A Permanent Marker Instead

shotsfiredyo Report

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Amanda Panda
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've done this to my elbow, had a tiny hole in my black cardigan, was in a hurry, quick fix. Also, life hack: use rubbing alcohol to get permanent marker off :)

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#11

Put Your New Tv Box On Your Neighbor's Side So You Wouldn't Get Robbed

Put Your New Tv Box On Your Neighbor's Side So You Wouldn't Get Robbed

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#13

Put A Bean Filled Glove On Your Baby's Back When You Want Your Kids To Feel Loved, But You're Too Tired

Put A Bean Filled Glove On Your Baby's Back When You Want Your Kids To Feel Loved, But You're Too Tired

FreddyJackson69 Report

#14

Impress Your Guests And Reduce Clutter With This Simple Tip

Impress Your Guests And Reduce Clutter With This Simple Tip

IAMAVERYGOODPERSON Report

#15

Tired Of Ironing Your Shirts? Get Fat And Watch Those Creases Vanish

Tired Of Ironing Your Shirts? Get Fat And Watch Those Creases Vanish

nocheeseforyou , Katja Zimmermann Report

#16

If You See Someone Crying, Ask If It Is Because Of Their Haircut

If You See Someone Crying, Ask If It Is Because Of Their Haircut

eXX0n Report

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#17

Stop Tears In The Kitchen With This Life Hack

Stop Tears In The Kitchen With This Life Hack

SashaEitan Report

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Amanda Panda
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

lol in all seriousness, I use eye goggles (cheap ones from the dollar store). I may look ridiculous, but I can get through cutting several onions without tears and burning eyes. Nothing else has worked better than goggles!

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#18

Save Time By Adding Toothpaste To Your Food

Save Time By Adding Toothpaste To Your Food

sinner_vip Report

#19

Use This Tip When You Want To Take A S**t Discretely

Use This Tip When You Want To Take A S**t Discretely

flait7 Report

#20

Use Duct Tape And Fork When There's No Spoon In The Office

Use Duct Tape And Fork When There's No Spoon In The Office

imperfectionasbeauty Report

#21

Use Your Hood As A Bowl For Popcorns

Use Your Hood As A Bowl For Popcorns

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Kawaii Lemon
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Added bonus: No need for perfume, you'll smell great! (Because who DOESN'T love the smell of popcorn?!)

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#22

Use Your Phones When You Put Too Much Water In Your Rice

Use Your Phones When You Put Too Much Water In Your Rice

uniquedude34557 Report

#23

Use This Tip If You Are A Student

Use This Tip If You Are A Student

Quaestorian_Guard Report

#24

Use Your Cat To Clean Your Floors And Save On Expensive Store-Bought Cleaners

Use Your Cat To Clean Your Floors And Save On Expensive Store-Bought Cleaners

Dialgax Report

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#25

Plug A Surge Protector Into Itself For Infinite Power

Plug A Surge Protector Into Itself For Infinite Power

LobsterThief Report

#26

Use This Go Go Gadget On A Sunny Day Out For A Hands Free Experience

Use This Go Go Gadget On A Sunny Day Out For A Hands Free Experience

therealgesus Report

#27

Just Add Water For A Quick And Easy Pasta

Just Add Water For A Quick And Easy Pasta

xeno27 Report

#28

Save Money With This Life Hack

Save Money With This Life Hack

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#31

Reverse Your Window A/C Unit Like So To Save On A Costly Heating. It's Also Good For The Environment Because It Cools The Outside, Reducing Global Warming

Reverse Your Window A/C Unit Like So To Save On A Costly Heating. It's Also Good For The Environment Because It Cools The Outside, Reducing Global Warming

imgur Report

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#33

Use Shopping Cart As A Backyard Grill

Use Shopping Cart As A Backyard Grill

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#34

Use A Fork In Case You Haven't Mastered Chopsticks Yet

Use A Fork In Case You Haven't Mastered Chopsticks Yet

RossPatric Report

#35

Put A Plastic Bag Over Your Head To Make You Pass Out So Work Feels Shorter

Put A Plastic Bag Over Your Head To Make You Pass Out So Work Feels Shorter

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#36

Buy As Many Tickets As You Can Afford

Buy As Many Tickets As You Can Afford

nowhathappenedwas Report

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Kjorn
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

well 1 chance on 102340503202340 or 2 chance on 102340503202340... 2 chances still better

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#37

If You're Up Really Late Studying For Finals, Try Swapping Your Contact Solution With Coffee For A Quick Pick-Me-Up

If You're Up Really Late Studying For Finals, Try Swapping Your Contact Solution With Coffee For A Quick Pick-Me-Up

throatfrog Report

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Zombie Gurl
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cousin did that, he was sent to the hospital. Been blind for three weeks

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#38

Suicidal? Buy Yourself A Bright New Pair Of Nikes To Cheer Yourself Up

Suicidal? Buy Yourself A Bright New Pair Of Nikes To Cheer Yourself Up

HittingSmoke Report

#39

Use Ketchup As A Bookmark

Use Ketchup As A Bookmark

elephantrambo Report

#40

Save Your Time When Working With Electric By Using This Tip

Save Your Time When Working With Electric By Using This Tip

NoIdPT Report

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#42

Mix 2 Tbs Lemon Juice, 2 Tbs Vinegar, And 3 Tbs Salt, Then Apply It To Open Cuts And Scrapes Using A Clean Toothbrush As A Safe And Natural Antibiotic

Mix 2 Tbs Lemon Juice, 2 Tbs Vinegar, And 3 Tbs Salt, Then Apply It To Open Cuts And Scrapes Using A Clean Toothbrush As A Safe And Natural Antibiotic

Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

#43

Use A Shopping Cart As A Shelf If You Have No Money For The Furnishings

Use A Shopping Cart As A Shelf If You Have No Money For The Furnishings

Brix Report

#44

Spilt Coffee On Your Pants And Don't Want To Look Like A Clumsy Dork? Just Soak Your Pants In A Tub Of Coffee So They Turn Into A Uniform Color Again

Spilt Coffee On Your Pants And Don't Want To Look Like A Clumsy Dork? Just Soak Your Pants In A Tub Of Coffee So They Turn Into A Uniform Color Again

4fmpb311cf Report

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cmg
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I actually did do this once.... I couldn't get a cooking oil stain out of a shirt I loved, so I put the whole shirt in a bucket with oil... it worked.. but then my shirt smelled like olive oil for a while! lmao

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#45

Sign All Of Your Blank Checks Now To Save Time Writing Future Checks

Sign All Of Your Blank Checks Now To Save Time Writing Future Checks

bluenemo Report

#46

Use These To Make Your Car Stop Beeping

Use These To Make Your Car Stop Beeping

lady_peace Report

#47

Use The Money That's Always In The Banana Stand To Get Dinner When You Are Broke

Use The Money That's Always In The Banana Stand To Get Dinner When You Are Broke

evilcoatrack Report

#48

Put Your Bolognese Into The Washing Machine If What You Really Wanted Was Carbonara

Put Your Bolognese Into The Washing Machine If What You Really Wanted Was Carbonara

ApplyBurnHeal Report

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#49

Use This Trick To Make Teacher Think You Are Studying While You're Eating Spaghetti

Use This Trick To Make Teacher Think You Are Studying While You're Eating Spaghetti

Hasmith99 Report

#50

Don't Waste Money On A Can Of Air, Just Wash Your Dusty Motherboard With Your Dishes

Don't Waste Money On A Can Of Air, Just Wash Your Dusty Motherboard With Your Dishes

Flaminate Report

#53

Use A Raw Chicken Breast To Pick Up Crumbs And Dust From Hard To Reach Areas

Use A Raw Chicken Breast To Pick Up Crumbs And Dust From Hard To Reach Areas

roseygrl98 Report

#54

Release Ants Into Your Toaster To Remove Bread Crumbs That Accumulate At The Bottom Which Can Pose A Fire Hazard

Release Ants Into Your Toaster To Remove Bread Crumbs That Accumulate At The Bottom Which Can Pose A Fire Hazard

Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

#55

Use Windshield Wiper Fluid As A "Universal Fluid" For Break Fluid, Engine Oil, Power Steering Or Just Splash Some On Your Car For A Quick Car-Wash (Major Car Companies Don't Want You To Know This)

Use Windshield Wiper Fluid As A "Universal Fluid" For Break Fluid, Engine Oil, Power Steering Or Just Splash Some On Your Car For A Quick Car-Wash (Major Car Companies Don't Want You To Know This)

PM_YR_HOT_BODY Report

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Cassie
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was a teenager, my father mistakenly put power steering fluid in instead of break fluid. That was a really fun drive.

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#56

Turn One Cigarette Upside Down And Smoke It Last

Turn One Cigarette Upside Down And Smoke It Last

chrimage Report

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Tiny Dynamine
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Millions of people would actually believe this. They all voted for Trump coincidentally.

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#57

Use This Tip For A Quick And Easy Breakfast

Use This Tip For A Quick And Easy Breakfast

adriofthedead Report

#58

Keep Cleaning Supplies And Other Useful Household Items On The Bottom Shelves So You Can Ask A Small Child To Get It For You In A Pinch

Keep Cleaning Supplies And Other Useful Household Items On The Bottom Shelves So You Can Ask A Small Child To Get It For You In A Pinch

muriouskind Report

#60

Change Your Iphone 5s Color Within Seconds

Change Your Iphone 5s Color Within Seconds

TechRax Report

#61

Peel A Banana And Put It Through The Hole On Your Bagel To Create A Bananagel

Peel A Banana And Put It Through The Hole On Your Bagel To Create A Bananagel

CrazyGrape Report

#62

Money Tip

Money Tip

obviousplant Report

#63

Water Cool Your Computer When It's Running Too Hot To Keep The Temperatures Down

Water Cool Your Computer When It's Running Too Hot To Keep The Temperatures Down

Flaminate Report

#64

Use A High-Powered Box Fan And Funnel To Quickly Paint Interior Walls

Use A High-Powered Box Fan And Funnel To Quickly Paint Interior Walls

Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

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Zori the degu
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This should only be done for colour refreshing (and should be kept as a "professional" secret)

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#65

Put Earplugs In Your Nose To Make It Harder To Breathe

Put Earplugs In Your Nose To Make It Harder To Breathe

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#66

Replace A Broken Ring Of The Shower Curtain With This Easy Hack

Replace A Broken Ring Of The Shower Curtain With This Easy Hack

AaronTiberius Report

#67

Make Homemade Wet Wipes By Soaking Toilet Paper Under Warm Water

Make Homemade Wet Wipes By Soaking Toilet Paper Under Warm Water

4fmpb311cf Report

#68

When You Break A Glass In The Kitchen, Press The Inner Fleshy Part Of Your Hand Against The Floor To Pick Up The Tiniest Glass Shards That Your Broom And Vacuum Leave Behind

When You Break A Glass In The Kitchen, Press The Inner Fleshy Part Of Your Hand Against The Floor To Pick Up The Tiniest Glass Shards That Your Broom And Vacuum Leave Behind

Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

#69

Put A Can Of Beer Between Your Legs When There Is No Beer Holder In Your Car

Put A Can Of Beer Between Your Legs When There Is No Beer Holder In Your Car

PGpanda Report

#70

Access iPhone 7 Headphone Jack With This Simple Hack

Access iPhone 7 Headphone Jack With This Simple Hack

Jdabby32 Report

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Cheryl Birkhimer
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thanks for the exact mm sizing tip. I've been trying to get the correct size for a week.

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#71

Put Dried Oak Chips Directly On The Elements Of Your Electric Oven To Give Chicken And Other Meats A Delicious Smokey Flavor While They Cook

Put Dried Oak Chips Directly On The Elements Of Your Electric Oven To Give Chicken And Other Meats A Delicious Smokey Flavor While They Cook

Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

#72

Roll Your Window Down, Put A Six Pack Of Beer On It And Roll It Back Up To Keep Half Your Beer Cold On Your Commute To Work

Roll Your Window Down, Put A Six Pack Of Beer On It And Roll It Back Up To Keep Half Your Beer Cold On Your Commute To Work

joetromboni Report

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#73

Add An Extra 1-2 PSI To The Driver Side Front Tire When Inflating Your Tires, Because That's The One That Has To Support Your Fat Ass

Add An Extra 1-2 PSI To The Driver Side Front Tire When Inflating Your Tires, Because That's The One That Has To Support Your Fat Ass

Fingerman2112 Report

#74

Pray Yourself In The Eyes With Windex To Quickly Clean Your Contacts Without The Hassle Of Removing Them

Pray Yourself In The Eyes With Windex To Quickly Clean Your Contacts Without The Hassle Of Removing Them

Report

#75

Use A Hair Dryer To Preheat A Pizza If You Don't Have A Microwave

Use A Hair Dryer To Preheat A Pizza If You Don't Have A Microwave

Wyofire Report

#76

Use Plastic Wrap As A Waterproof Phone Case

Use Plastic Wrap As A Waterproof Phone Case

michaelp1987 Report

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Rachael Piotte
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ziploc bag works better because there aren't any seams for the water to seep through like plastic wrap. My sister uses it all the time, it works.

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#77

Use An Extension Cord To Maximize The Length When Phone Charger Is Too Short To Reach The Outlet

Use An Extension Cord To Maximize The Length When Phone Charger Is Too Short To Reach The Outlet

Flaminate Report

#78

Never Buy Dental Floss Again! Attach A Small Handle In The Middle Of The Dispenser And Use It To Retract The Floss After You Use It Instead Of Tearing Off A New Piece Each Time

Never Buy Dental Floss Again! Attach A Small Handle In The Middle Of The Dispenser And Use It To Retract The Floss After You Use It Instead Of Tearing Off A New Piece Each Time

Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

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jacluckycat
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Added bonus: flavoured just like the chunks of food you already flossed out

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#79

Use Knives To Hang Shit Without Damaging Anything

Use Knives To Hang Shit Without Damaging Anything

Sommern Report

#80

Use This Life Hack And No One Will Know There Are Holes In Your Shoes

Use This Life Hack And No One Will Know There Are Holes In Your Shoes

Minimee321 Report

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#81

Combine Bathroom Breaks And Lunch Breaks To Maximise Time Efficiency

Combine Bathroom Breaks And Lunch Breaks To Maximise Time Efficiency

YASATTACK Report

#82

Marinate, Season, And Tenderize Your Steak All At The Same Time! Add One Cup Off Bbq, Teriyaki, Or Other Flavored Sauce To The Washing Machine, And Run Your Steaks On A Short No Rinse Cycle. Add Spices And Herbs To The Fabric Softener Dispenser For Added Flavor

Marinate, Season, And Tenderize Your Steak All At The Same Time! Add One Cup Off Bbq, Teriyaki, Or Other Flavored Sauce To The Washing Machine, And Run Your Steaks On A Short No Rinse Cycle. Add Spices And Herbs To The Fabric Softener Dispenser For Added Flavor

Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

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Jespren Ray
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm cringing thinking of some poor mom having to clean this message out of her dryer because their teenage saw it on Facebook and thought it would be a quick way to help with dinner.

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#83

Collect The Gummy Catsup Gaskets That Form Around The Top Of The Lid And Put Them In School Lunches As A Healthy Alternative To Sugary Fruit Snacks. Plus They're Loaded With Vitamin C

Collect The Gummy Catsup Gaskets That Form Around The Top Of The Lid And Put Them In School Lunches As A Healthy Alternative To Sugary Fruit Snacks. Plus They're Loaded With Vitamin C

Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

#84

Use A Projector Instead Of Spilling Yoghurt Everywhere When Your Spoon Is Constantly Tipping Over Your Yoghurt Container

Use A Projector Instead Of Spilling Yoghurt Everywhere When Your Spoon Is Constantly Tipping Over Your Yoghurt Container

imgur Report

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Cheryl Birkhimer
Community Member
7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's brilliant how seriously some people respond to all these great Martha Stewart- like tips.

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