ADVERTISEMENT

Are you looking for terrible and completely useless life tips? Then you've come to the right place! Bored Panda has compiled a list of the crappiest advice ever.

Some of them come from a sub-Reddit called /r/ShittyLifeProTips, and while they won't actually help you to achieve much, they are at least useful when it comes to making us laugh. From using ketchup as a bookmark to saving yourself precious time by adding toothpaste to meals, these "pro" life tips are sure to put a smile on your face while completely failing to help you in any practical way. Don't forget to vote for your favorite!

P.S.: These tips are a joke and may be dangerous, don't try them yourself!

#1

Use A Toilet Seat To Put Your Plate On While Watching TV

Use A Toilet Seat To Put Your Plate On While Watching TV

Report

RELATED:
    #2

    Take A Selfie Through A Toilet Roll Tube And Pretend You're The Moon

    Take A Selfie Through A Toilet Roll Tube And Pretend You're The Moon

    CommunistCate Report

    #3

    Spray Your Headphones With Some "Johnson's No More Tangles" When They Are Tangled

    Spray Your Headphones With Some "Johnson's No More Tangles" When They Are Tangled

    Eeli100 Report

    #4

    Cut Your Tennis Balls In Half To Store Two More Balls In Each Can, Saving Space

    Cut Your Tennis Balls In Half To Store Two More Balls In Each Can, Saving Space

    fantafano Report

    #5

    Sneak A Chocolate Into American Movie Theatres With This Trick

    Sneak A Chocolate Into American Movie Theatres With This Trick

    Miko99 Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Sheralyn
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eh. Looks like this might work in America. You guys can carry guns in some states right?

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #6

    Use This Vest Protect Your Personal Space On The Subway

    Use This Vest Protect Your Personal Space On The Subway

    Siew Ming Cheng Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Rob LeBlanc
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wearing a surgical mask and occasionally coughing guarantees added personal space for my NYC subway rides. ;)

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #7

    Use The Metal Part Of Your Seat Belt To Open Beers While Driving

    Use The Metal Part Of Your Seat Belt To Open Beers While Driving

    420B Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or buy the unattached ones in the other post, and just use those.

    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #8

    Magnify Your Phone's Screen By Putting It In A Glass Of Water

    Magnify Your Phone's Screen By Putting It In A Glass Of Water

    the_pr0fessor Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    #9

    Keep Cake Moist By Eating It All In One Sitting

    Keep Cake Moist By Eating It All In One Sitting

    Louniness Report

    #10

    Don't Buy New Socks. Use A Permanent Marker Instead

    Don't Buy New Socks. Use A Permanent Marker Instead

    shotsfiredyo Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've done this to my elbow, had a tiny hole in my black cardigan, was in a hurry, quick fix. Also, life hack: use rubbing alcohol to get permanent marker off :)

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #11

    Put Your New Tv Box On Your Neighbor's Side So You Wouldn't Get Robbed

    Put Your New Tv Box On Your Neighbor's Side So You Wouldn't Get Robbed

    Report

    #13

    Put A Bean Filled Glove On Your Baby's Back When You Want Your Kids To Feel Loved, But You're Too Tired

    Put A Bean Filled Glove On Your Baby's Back When You Want Your Kids To Feel Loved, But You're Too Tired

    FreddyJackson69 Report

    #14

    Impress Your Guests And Reduce Clutter With This Simple Tip

    Impress Your Guests And Reduce Clutter With This Simple Tip

    IAMAVERYGOODPERSON Report

    #15

    Tired Of Ironing Your Shirts? Get Fat And Watch Those Creases Vanish

    Tired Of Ironing Your Shirts? Get Fat And Watch Those Creases Vanish

    nocheeseforyou , Katja Zimmermann Report

    #16

    If You See Someone Crying, Ask If It Is Because Of Their Haircut

    If You See Someone Crying, Ask If It Is Because Of Their Haircut

    eXX0n Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #17

    Stop Tears In The Kitchen With This Life Hack

    Stop Tears In The Kitchen With This Life Hack

    SashaEitan Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    lol in all seriousness, I use eye goggles (cheap ones from the dollar store). I may look ridiculous, but I can get through cutting several onions without tears and burning eyes. Nothing else has worked better than goggles!

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #18

    Save Time By Adding Toothpaste To Your Food

    Save Time By Adding Toothpaste To Your Food

    sinner_vip Report

    #19

    Use This Tip When You Want To Take A S**t Discretely

    Use This Tip When You Want To Take A S**t Discretely

    flait7 Report

    #20

    Use Duct Tape And Fork When There's No Spoon In The Office

    Use Duct Tape And Fork When There's No Spoon In The Office

    imperfectionasbeauty Report

    #21

    Use Your Hood As A Bowl For Popcorns

    Use Your Hood As A Bowl For Popcorns

    Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Kawaii Lemon
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Added bonus: No need for perfume, you'll smell great! (Because who DOESN'T love the smell of popcorn?!)

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #22

    Use Your Phones When You Put Too Much Water In Your Rice

    Use Your Phones When You Put Too Much Water In Your Rice

    uniquedude34557 Report

    #23

    Use This Tip If You Are A Student

    Use This Tip If You Are A Student

    Quaestorian_Guard Report

    #24

    Use Your Cat To Clean Your Floors And Save On Expensive Store-Bought Cleaners

    Use Your Cat To Clean Your Floors And Save On Expensive Store-Bought Cleaners

    Dialgax Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #25

    Plug A Surge Protector Into Itself For Infinite Power

    Plug A Surge Protector Into Itself For Infinite Power

    LobsterThief Report

    #26

    Use This Go Go Gadget On A Sunny Day Out For A Hands Free Experience

    Use This Go Go Gadget On A Sunny Day Out For A Hands Free Experience

    therealgesus Report

    #27

    Just Add Water For A Quick And Easy Pasta

    Just Add Water For A Quick And Easy Pasta

    xeno27 Report

    #28

    Save Money With This Life Hack

    Save Money With This Life Hack

    Report

    #31

    Reverse Your Window A/C Unit Like So To Save On A Costly Heating. It's Also Good For The Environment Because It Cools The Outside, Reducing Global Warming

    Reverse Your Window A/C Unit Like So To Save On A Costly Heating. It's Also Good For The Environment Because It Cools The Outside, Reducing Global Warming

    imgur Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #33

    Use Shopping Cart As A Backyard Grill

    Use Shopping Cart As A Backyard Grill

    Report

    #34

    Use A Fork In Case You Haven't Mastered Chopsticks Yet

    Use A Fork In Case You Haven't Mastered Chopsticks Yet

    RossPatric Report

    #35

    Put A Plastic Bag Over Your Head To Make You Pass Out So Work Feels Shorter

    Put A Plastic Bag Over Your Head To Make You Pass Out So Work Feels Shorter

    Report

    #36

    Buy As Many Tickets As You Can Afford

    Buy As Many Tickets As You Can Afford

    nowhathappenedwas Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Kjorn
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    well 1 chance on 102340503202340 or 2 chance on 102340503202340... 2 chances still better

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #37

    If You're Up Really Late Studying For Finals, Try Swapping Your Contact Solution With Coffee For A Quick Pick-Me-Up

    If You're Up Really Late Studying For Finals, Try Swapping Your Contact Solution With Coffee For A Quick Pick-Me-Up

    throatfrog Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Zombie Gurl
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My cousin did that, he was sent to the hospital. Been blind for three weeks

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #38

    Suicidal? Buy Yourself A Bright New Pair Of Nikes To Cheer Yourself Up

    Suicidal? Buy Yourself A Bright New Pair Of Nikes To Cheer Yourself Up

    HittingSmoke Report

    #39

    Use Ketchup As A Bookmark

    Use Ketchup As A Bookmark

    elephantrambo Report

    #40

    Save Your Time When Working With Electric By Using This Tip

    Save Your Time When Working With Electric By Using This Tip

    NoIdPT Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #42

    Mix 2 Tbs Lemon Juice, 2 Tbs Vinegar, And 3 Tbs Salt, Then Apply It To Open Cuts And Scrapes Using A Clean Toothbrush As A Safe And Natural Antibiotic

    Mix 2 Tbs Lemon Juice, 2 Tbs Vinegar, And 3 Tbs Salt, Then Apply It To Open Cuts And Scrapes Using A Clean Toothbrush As A Safe And Natural Antibiotic

    Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

    #43

    Use A Shopping Cart As A Shelf If You Have No Money For The Furnishings

    Use A Shopping Cart As A Shelf If You Have No Money For The Furnishings

    Brix Report

    #44

    Spilt Coffee On Your Pants And Don't Want To Look Like A Clumsy Dork? Just Soak Your Pants In A Tub Of Coffee So They Turn Into A Uniform Color Again

    Spilt Coffee On Your Pants And Don't Want To Look Like A Clumsy Dork? Just Soak Your Pants In A Tub Of Coffee So They Turn Into A Uniform Color Again

    4fmpb311cf Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    cmg
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I actually did do this once.... I couldn't get a cooking oil stain out of a shirt I loved, so I put the whole shirt in a bucket with oil... it worked.. but then my shirt smelled like olive oil for a while! lmao

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #45

    Sign All Of Your Blank Checks Now To Save Time Writing Future Checks

    Sign All Of Your Blank Checks Now To Save Time Writing Future Checks

    bluenemo Report

    #46

    Use These To Make Your Car Stop Beeping

    Use These To Make Your Car Stop Beeping

    lady_peace Report

    #47

    Use The Money That's Always In The Banana Stand To Get Dinner When You Are Broke

    Use The Money That's Always In The Banana Stand To Get Dinner When You Are Broke

    evilcoatrack Report

    #48

    Put Your Bolognese Into The Washing Machine If What You Really Wanted Was Carbonara

    Put Your Bolognese Into The Washing Machine If What You Really Wanted Was Carbonara

    ApplyBurnHeal Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #49

    Use This Trick To Make Teacher Think You Are Studying While You're Eating Spaghetti

    Use This Trick To Make Teacher Think You Are Studying While You're Eating Spaghetti

    Hasmith99 Report

    #50

    Don't Waste Money On A Can Of Air, Just Wash Your Dusty Motherboard With Your Dishes

    Don't Waste Money On A Can Of Air, Just Wash Your Dusty Motherboard With Your Dishes

    Flaminate Report

    #53

    Use A Raw Chicken Breast To Pick Up Crumbs And Dust From Hard To Reach Areas

    Use A Raw Chicken Breast To Pick Up Crumbs And Dust From Hard To Reach Areas

    roseygrl98 Report

    #54

    Release Ants Into Your Toaster To Remove Bread Crumbs That Accumulate At The Bottom Which Can Pose A Fire Hazard

    Release Ants Into Your Toaster To Remove Bread Crumbs That Accumulate At The Bottom Which Can Pose A Fire Hazard

    Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

    #55

    Use Windshield Wiper Fluid As A "Universal Fluid" For Break Fluid, Engine Oil, Power Steering Or Just Splash Some On Your Car For A Quick Car-Wash (Major Car Companies Don't Want You To Know This)

    Use Windshield Wiper Fluid As A "Universal Fluid" For Break Fluid, Engine Oil, Power Steering Or Just Splash Some On Your Car For A Quick Car-Wash (Major Car Companies Don't Want You To Know This)

    PM_YR_HOT_BODY Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Cassie
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was a teenager, my father mistakenly put power steering fluid in instead of break fluid. That was a really fun drive.

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #56

    Turn One Cigarette Upside Down And Smoke It Last

    Turn One Cigarette Upside Down And Smoke It Last

    chrimage Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Tiny Dynamine
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Millions of people would actually believe this. They all voted for Trump coincidentally.

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #57

    Use This Tip For A Quick And Easy Breakfast

    Use This Tip For A Quick And Easy Breakfast

    adriofthedead Report

    #58

    Keep Cleaning Supplies And Other Useful Household Items On The Bottom Shelves So You Can Ask A Small Child To Get It For You In A Pinch

    Keep Cleaning Supplies And Other Useful Household Items On The Bottom Shelves So You Can Ask A Small Child To Get It For You In A Pinch

    muriouskind Report

    #60

    Change Your Iphone 5s Color Within Seconds

    Change Your Iphone 5s Color Within Seconds

    TechRax Report

    #61

    Peel A Banana And Put It Through The Hole On Your Bagel To Create A Bananagel

    Peel A Banana And Put It Through The Hole On Your Bagel To Create A Bananagel

    CrazyGrape Report

    #62

    Money Tip

    Money Tip

    obviousplant Report

    #63

    Water Cool Your Computer When It's Running Too Hot To Keep The Temperatures Down

    Water Cool Your Computer When It's Running Too Hot To Keep The Temperatures Down

    Flaminate Report

    #64

    Use A High-Powered Box Fan And Funnel To Quickly Paint Interior Walls

    Use A High-Powered Box Fan And Funnel To Quickly Paint Interior Walls

    Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Zori the degu
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This should only be done for colour refreshing (and should be kept as a "professional" secret)

    View more commentsArrow down menu
    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #65

    Put Earplugs In Your Nose To Make It Harder To Breathe

    Put Earplugs In Your Nose To Make It Harder To Breathe

    Report

    #66

    Replace A Broken Ring Of The Shower Curtain With This Easy Hack

    Replace A Broken Ring Of The Shower Curtain With This Easy Hack

    AaronTiberius Report

    #67

    Make Homemade Wet Wipes By Soaking Toilet Paper Under Warm Water

    Make Homemade Wet Wipes By Soaking Toilet Paper Under Warm Water

    4fmpb311cf Report

    #68

    When You Break A Glass In The Kitchen, Press The Inner Fleshy Part Of Your Hand Against The Floor To Pick Up The Tiniest Glass Shards That Your Broom And Vacuum Leave Behind

    When You Break A Glass In The Kitchen, Press The Inner Fleshy Part Of Your Hand Against The Floor To Pick Up The Tiniest Glass Shards That Your Broom And Vacuum Leave Behind

    Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

    #69

    Put A Can Of Beer Between Your Legs When There Is No Beer Holder In Your Car

    Put A Can Of Beer Between Your Legs When There Is No Beer Holder In Your Car

    PGpanda Report

    #70

    Access iPhone 7 Headphone Jack With This Simple Hack

    Access iPhone 7 Headphone Jack With This Simple Hack

    Jdabby32 Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Cheryl Birkhimer
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thanks for the exact mm sizing tip. I've been trying to get the correct size for a week.

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #71

    Put Dried Oak Chips Directly On The Elements Of Your Electric Oven To Give Chicken And Other Meats A Delicious Smokey Flavor While They Cook

    Put Dried Oak Chips Directly On The Elements Of Your Electric Oven To Give Chicken And Other Meats A Delicious Smokey Flavor While They Cook

    Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

    #72

    Roll Your Window Down, Put A Six Pack Of Beer On It And Roll It Back Up To Keep Half Your Beer Cold On Your Commute To Work

    Roll Your Window Down, Put A Six Pack Of Beer On It And Roll It Back Up To Keep Half Your Beer Cold On Your Commute To Work

    joetromboni Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #73

    Add An Extra 1-2 PSI To The Driver Side Front Tire When Inflating Your Tires, Because That's The One That Has To Support Your Fat Ass

    Add An Extra 1-2 PSI To The Driver Side Front Tire When Inflating Your Tires, Because That's The One That Has To Support Your Fat Ass

    Fingerman2112 Report

    #74

    Pray Yourself In The Eyes With Windex To Quickly Clean Your Contacts Without The Hassle Of Removing Them

    Pray Yourself In The Eyes With Windex To Quickly Clean Your Contacts Without The Hassle Of Removing Them

    Report

    #75

    Use A Hair Dryer To Preheat A Pizza If You Don't Have A Microwave

    Use A Hair Dryer To Preheat A Pizza If You Don't Have A Microwave

    Wyofire Report

    #76

    Use Plastic Wrap As A Waterproof Phone Case

    Use Plastic Wrap As A Waterproof Phone Case

    michaelp1987 Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Rachael Piotte
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ziploc bag works better because there aren't any seams for the water to seep through like plastic wrap. My sister uses it all the time, it works.

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #77

    Use An Extension Cord To Maximize The Length When Phone Charger Is Too Short To Reach The Outlet

    Use An Extension Cord To Maximize The Length When Phone Charger Is Too Short To Reach The Outlet

    Flaminate Report

    #78

    Never Buy Dental Floss Again! Attach A Small Handle In The Middle Of The Dispenser And Use It To Retract The Floss After You Use It Instead Of Tearing Off A New Piece Each Time

    Never Buy Dental Floss Again! Attach A Small Handle In The Middle Of The Dispenser And Use It To Retract The Floss After You Use It Instead Of Tearing Off A New Piece Each Time

    Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    jacluckycat
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Added bonus: flavoured just like the chunks of food you already flossed out

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #79

    Use Knives To Hang Shit Without Damaging Anything

    Use Knives To Hang Shit Without Damaging Anything

    Sommern Report

    #80

    Use This Life Hack And No One Will Know There Are Holes In Your Shoes

    Use This Life Hack And No One Will Know There Are Holes In Your Shoes

    Minimee321 Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #81

    Combine Bathroom Breaks And Lunch Breaks To Maximise Time Efficiency

    Combine Bathroom Breaks And Lunch Breaks To Maximise Time Efficiency

    YASATTACK Report

    #82

    Marinate, Season, And Tenderize Your Steak All At The Same Time! Add One Cup Off Bbq, Teriyaki, Or Other Flavored Sauce To The Washing Machine, And Run Your Steaks On A Short No Rinse Cycle. Add Spices And Herbs To The Fabric Softener Dispenser For Added Flavor

    Marinate, Season, And Tenderize Your Steak All At The Same Time! Add One Cup Off Bbq, Teriyaki, Or Other Flavored Sauce To The Washing Machine, And Run Your Steaks On A Short No Rinse Cycle. Add Spices And Herbs To The Fabric Softener Dispenser For Added Flavor

    Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Jespren Ray
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm cringing thinking of some poor mom having to clean this message out of her dryer because their teenage saw it on Facebook and thought it would be a quick way to help with dinner.

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu
    #83

    Collect The Gummy Catsup Gaskets That Form Around The Top Of The Lid And Put Them In School Lunches As A Healthy Alternative To Sugary Fruit Snacks. Plus They're Loaded With Vitamin C

    Collect The Gummy Catsup Gaskets That Form Around The Top Of The Lid And Put Them In School Lunches As A Healthy Alternative To Sugary Fruit Snacks. Plus They're Loaded With Vitamin C

    Abbadabbadabbadabble Report

    #84

    Use A Projector Instead Of Spilling Yoghurt Everywhere When Your Spoon Is Constantly Tipping Over Your Yoghurt Container

    Use A Projector Instead Of Spilling Yoghurt Everywhere When Your Spoon Is Constantly Tipping Over Your Yoghurt Container

    imgur Report

    Add photo comments
    POST
    Cheryl Birkhimer
    Community Member
    7 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's brilliant how seriously some people respond to all these great Martha Stewart- like tips.

    View More Replies...
    View more commentsArrow down menu