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Life hacks are awesome. Handy short cuts that let you get the boring stuff done quicker and easier, giving you more time to get on with the more important stuff, like playing with your dog or saving the world.

These life hacks however, are not that. These are parody life hacks, life hacks so creatively useless that the only thing they are good for is making you giggle uncontrollably. Which I guess is an end unto itself right? This is the sequel to our previous pro-tip shit list, which proved wildly popular!

Scroll down the list below and marvel at the absurdity of it all, but whatever you do don’t take any of this terrible advice on board, as some of them are actually pretty dangerous. Do vote for your favourite though!

#1

Don't Throw Out Old Doll Heads. You Can Turn Them Into Handy Night Lights For Your Kids

Don't Throw Out Old Doll Heads. You Can Turn Them Into Handy Night Lights For Your Kids

Improbably_wrong Report

#2

Tired Of Boiling Water Every Time You Make Pasta? Boil A Few Gallons At The Beginning Of The Week And Freeze It For Later

Tired Of Boiling Water Every Time You Make Pasta? Boil A Few Gallons At The Beginning Of The Week And Freeze It For Later

datassque Report

#3

Non-Smoker Hack

Non-Smoker Hack

buttpoems Report

#4

Eggs Are Really Healthy And Should Be The Foundation Of Your Diet. Don't Like The Taste? Add Cacao, Butter, Flour And Bake For 30 Minutes

Eggs Are Really Healthy And Should Be The Foundation Of Your Diet. Don't Like The Taste? Add Cacao, Butter, Flour And Bake For 30 Minutes

toromio Report

#5

If You Sleep Till Noon You Only Have To Pay For 2 Meals Instead Of 3

If You Sleep Till Noon You Only Have To Pay For 2 Meals Instead Of 3

harriscolten Report

#6

Batteries Dead In Your Smoke Alarm? Just Use Popcorn As A Smoke Alarm. When You Hear Crackling, Grab Your Popcorn And Get The Hell Out

Batteries Dead In Your Smoke Alarm? Just Use Popcorn As A Smoke Alarm. When You Hear Crackling, Grab Your Popcorn And Get The Hell Out

shittyIifetips Report

#7

If It Works It Isn't Stupid

If It Works It Isn't Stupid

maharaja17 Report

#8

Use A Snake To Hold Your Pasta Easily

Use A Snake To Hold Your Pasta Easily

Tucko29 Report

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#9

If Your Car Is Making An Unsettling Noise, Just Turn Your Radio Up Until It Disappears

If Your Car Is Making An Unsettling Noise, Just Turn Your Radio Up Until It Disappears

theultimatedoot Report

#10

When Cutting Bagels In Half, Put Your Finger Through The Stabilization Hole To Keep It Steady

When Cutting Bagels In Half, Put Your Finger Through The Stabilization Hole To Keep It Steady

jaapgrolleman Report

#11

Fill Your Arms With Puppies So No One Can Ask You For Help

Fill Your Arms With Puppies So No One Can Ask You For Help

Report

#12

Pro Tip: If You Stir Coconut Oil Into Your Kale It Makes It Easier To Scrape Into The Trash

Pro Tip: If You Stir Coconut Oil Into Your Kale It Makes It Easier To Scrape Into The Trash

Boobooloo Report

#13

Having A Shitty Day? Put On Sunglasses! Now You're Having A Shitty Evening

Having A Shitty Day? Put On Sunglasses! Now You're Having A Shitty Evening

SkillUpYT Report

#14

Fill A Rubber Glove With Warm Water And Put It On Your Hand When You Feel Lonely

Fill A Rubber Glove With Warm Water And Put It On Your Hand When You Feel Lonely

gregthegregest Report

#15

Use This Hack With Deaf People

Use This Hack With Deaf People

robotrowboat Report

#16

Want To Get Rid Of Wrinkles Fast? Just Get Bit By A Rattlesnake

Want To Get Rid Of Wrinkles Fast? Just Get Bit By A Rattlesnake

kyletells Report

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#17

Want To Turn Your Drink Into Diet? No Problem! Just Push This Button

Want To Turn Your Drink Into Diet? No Problem! Just Push This Button

osher32 Report

#18

Add A Touch Of Magic To Your Cold By Putting Glitter In Your Mouth Before You Sneeze

Add A Touch Of Magic To Your Cold By Putting Glitter In Your Mouth Before You Sneeze

Report

#19

If Your Phone Screen Is Too Small, Put It In Water. It Will Magnify The Screen Up To 200%

If Your Phone Screen Is Too Small, Put It In Water. It Will Magnify The Screen Up To 200%

gabewil Report

#20

Use This Tip To Save Your Money

Use This Tip To Save Your Money

howfemalesact Report

#21

Sink Full Of Dirty Dishes? Visitors Imminent? Put Some Clean Dishes In The Dishrack. Now It Looks Like You're Working On It

Sink Full Of Dirty Dishes? Visitors Imminent? Put Some Clean Dishes In The Dishrack. Now It Looks Like You're Working On It

TheJoePilato Report

#22

Don't Be Afraid To Use Public Bathrooms Ever Again

Don't Be Afraid To Use Public Bathrooms Ever Again

j0be Report

#23

A Slice Of Red Onion In Your Dvd Drive Is An All-Natural Way Of Protecting Your Computer Against Viruses

A Slice Of Red Onion In Your Dvd Drive Is An All-Natural Way Of Protecting Your Computer Against Viruses

thejogging Report

#24

To Maximize Horsepower On The Highway Shift From 5th Gear To "R" For Racing

To Maximize Horsepower On The Highway Shift From 5th Gear To "R" For Racing

gregthegregest Report

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#25

If You Put Your Wipers Up Parking Inspectors Are Unable To Give You A Ticket

If You Put Your Wipers Up Parking Inspectors Are Unable To Give You A Ticket

untitled02 Report

#26

Retread Tires Easily With A Sharpie

Retread Tires Easily With A Sharpie

mike_pants Report

#27

Use Cello Tape As Hands Free Selfie Stick

Use Cello Tape As Hands Free Selfie Stick

ripeinmay Report

#28

Dress For The Weight You Want, Not The Weight You Have

Dress For The Weight You Want, Not The Weight You Have

dustinyo_ Report

#29

Having Trouble Finding A Parking Spot? Turn On Your Hazard Lights To Make Yourself Immune To Traffic Laws, Then Park Wherever You Want

Having Trouble Finding A Parking Spot? Turn On Your Hazard Lights To Make Yourself Immune To Traffic Laws, Then Park Wherever You Want

jtumbaco5 Report

#30

Don't Have A Flashlight On Your Phone? Take A Picture Of The Sun And Use The Photo To Find Your Way In The Dark

Don't Have A Flashlight On Your Phone? Take A Picture Of The Sun And Use The Photo To Find Your Way In The Dark

Samrulesan Report

#31

When All The Cups Are Dirty And You're Too Lazy To Clean One

When All The Cups Are Dirty And You're Too Lazy To Clean One

Report

#32

Use This Simple Tip To Get Free Meals Forever

Use This Simple Tip To Get Free Meals Forever

TheSlimyDog Report

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#33

Save Hundreds Instantly

Save Hundreds Instantly

daftlimmy Report

#34

This Tiny Tool Can Make Any Pair Of Headphones Wireless

This Tiny Tool Can Make Any Pair Of Headphones Wireless

Evan_Giants Report

#35

In An Awkward/Uncomfortable Situation? Just Moon-Walk Away. People Will Think You Are Walking Towards That, But You Are In Fact Leaving

In An Awkward/Uncomfortable Situation? Just Moon-Walk Away. People Will Think You Are Walking Towards That, But You Are In Fact Leaving

Olena Hromova Report

#36

If You're In A Rush In The Morning, Remember To Save Some Time By Having Breakfast Whilst Cleaning Your Teeth At The Same Time

If You're In A Rush In The Morning, Remember To Save Some Time By Having Breakfast Whilst Cleaning Your Teeth At The Same Time

HaveAGoodDay_ Report

#37

Plant Your Hot Dog Seeds Now To Guarantee A Healthy Bounty For Your Backyard BBQ

Plant Your Hot Dog Seeds Now To Guarantee A Healthy Bounty For Your Backyard BBQ

StupidLullabies Report

#38

Tear A Strip Off Of Plastic Cups To Make A Convenient Handle

Tear A Strip Off Of Plastic Cups To Make A Convenient Handle

JumpinJalupes Report

#39

No Friends? Doesn't Matter. Use This Hack

No Friends? Doesn't Matter. Use This Hack

joeheenan Report

#40

Not Disabled? Put One Of These On Your Car To Use Disabled Parking Whenever You Like

Not Disabled? Put One Of These On Your Car To Use Disabled Parking Whenever You Like

Roland_Sausage Report

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#41

Take Random Pills

Take Random Pills

gregthegregest Report

#42

Use Condoms As Homemade Waterproof Socks

Use Condoms As Homemade Waterproof Socks

Uncle_Retardo Report

#43

Nail Art Hack

Nail Art Hack

rob-ho Report

#44

Here's A Tip For Boys: Put A Pee Stain Down Low On Your Jeans And People Will Think Your Penis Is Longer

Here's A Tip For Boys: Put A Pee Stain Down Low On Your Jeans And People Will Think Your Penis Is Longer

Protttt Report

#45

When Painting The Outside Of Your House, Use A Fine Detail Brush. Larger Brushes Are Often Lower Quality And Use Far More Paint

When Painting The Outside Of Your House, Use A Fine Detail Brush. Larger Brushes Are Often Lower Quality And Use Far More Paint

RecycleYourCats Report

#46

Get A Whole Extra Glass Of Juice By Slightly Tilting The Carton

Get A Whole Extra Glass Of Juice By Slightly Tilting The Carton

theangrypancake Report

#47

Having Trouble Opening A Soda Bottle? Hold It Upside-Down Whilst You Open It. This Will Force All The Gases Away From The Neck Of The Bottle And Make It Much Easier To Open

Having Trouble Opening A Soda Bottle? Hold It Upside-Down Whilst You Open It. This Will Force All The Gases Away From The Neck Of The Bottle And Make It Much Easier To Open

lifehackeble Report

#48

Use Frozen Vegetables When You Run Out Of Ice

Use Frozen Vegetables When You Run Out Of Ice

deviousdishsoap Report

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#49

Throw It In A Microwave And You Won't Even Be Able To Tell The Difference

Throw It In A Microwave And You Won't Even Be Able To Tell The Difference

190IQ_REDDIT_SAGE Report

#50

Make Your Car Almost Twice As Fast By Changing It From Mph To Kmh

Make Your Car Almost Twice As Fast By Changing It From Mph To Kmh

Bioslayer2k Report

#51

To Make Sure Your Phone Is Nice And Clean, Microwave It For 30 Seconds In The Morning To Get Rid Of All The Bad Bacteria That Might Have Got On It During The Night

To Make Sure Your Phone Is Nice And Clean, Microwave It For 30 Seconds In The Morning To Get Rid Of All The Bad Bacteria That Might Have Got On It During The Night

ultowich Report

#52

Here's A Simple & Easy Way To Lose Weight Fast. You Can Lose A Ton Of Weight Just By Weighing Yourself While Sitting On The Toilet

Here's A Simple & Easy Way To Lose Weight Fast. You Can Lose A Ton Of Weight Just By Weighing Yourself While Sitting On The Toilet

chuckhistory Report

#53

Use This When You Want Your Pc To Be Even Faster

Use This When You Want Your Pc To Be Even Faster

TheRadmite Report

#54

Never Lose Your Keys Again

Never Lose Your Keys Again

Fckuu Report

#55

Fire Extinguishers Can Be Damaged So To Keep It Safe Have It In A High Place That's Out Of Reach So It Will Be Ready When You Need It

Fire Extinguishers Can Be Damaged So To Keep It Safe Have It In A High Place That's Out Of Reach So It Will Be Ready When You Need It

gcbkkm2007 Report

#56

Never Slip In The Winter Anymore By Piercing Screwdrivers Through Your Wheels

Never Slip In The Winter Anymore By Piercing Screwdrivers Through Your Wheels

HahaUrGay Report

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#57

Inform An Officer You Are Carrying A Handgun Like This

Inform An Officer You Are Carrying A Handgun Like This

Luke Soderling Report

#58

How To Make Your Own Quesadilla Wallet In 3 Super Easy Steps

How To Make Your Own Quesadilla Wallet In 3 Super Easy Steps

notquitestrongbad Report

#59

Replace Your Treadmill Belt With Sandpaper For Better Traction While Running

Replace Your Treadmill Belt With Sandpaper For Better Traction While Running

DuctTapeNinja99 Report

#60

Coffee Got Cold? Heat It Up Quick On The Stove

Coffee Got Cold? Heat It Up Quick On The Stove

Tiraffe Report

#61

The Iphone 7 Does Has A Headphone Jack! It's Just Hidden Behind The Casing. All You Have To Do To Access It Is To Drill A Small Hole 14mm From The Left Edge. The Drill Shouldn't Be Larger Than 4mm

The Iphone 7 Does Has A Headphone Jack! It's Just Hidden Behind The Casing. All You Have To Do To Access It Is To Drill A Small Hole 14mm From The Left Edge. The Drill Shouldn't Be Larger Than 4mm

Jdabby32 Report

#62

If You Need To Rob A Bank And Don't Have A Stocking, Use An Extra Large Condom Instead

If You Need To Rob A Bank And Don't Have A Stocking, Use An Extra Large Condom Instead

rodent999 Report

#63

Turn One Cigarette Upside Down And Smoke It Last. This "Lucky Cigarette" Will Prevent You From Getting Cancer

Turn One Cigarette Upside Down And Smoke It Last. This "Lucky Cigarette" Will Prevent You From Getting Cancer

Baddudes Report

#64

Don't Put Gas In Your Car, The Extra Weight Reduces Fuel Efficiency

Don't Put Gas In Your Car, The Extra Weight Reduces Fuel Efficiency

shittyIifetips Report

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#65

Grab A Piping Hot Cuppa Joe At The Corner Store And Stick An Egg In It To Make A Hard Boiled Morning Snack

Grab A Piping Hot Cuppa Joe At The Corner Store And Stick An Egg In It To Make A Hard Boiled Morning Snack

vice Report

#66

Instead Of Wasting Cans, Put Them To Use And Make Do-It-Yourself Cup

Instead Of Wasting Cans, Put Them To Use And Make Do-It-Yourself Cup

CracklesCousin Report