Family dinner should be a relaxing, drama-free time to gather with loved ones and enjoy a delicious meal. But unfortunately, relatives always find a way to complicate things.

So when one woman realized that her fine china was mysteriously getting broken every time she invited the family over for dinner, she decided to get to the bottom of it. Below, you’ll find a post that she recently shared on the “Am I the Jerk?” subreddit, as well as some of the responses invested readers left her.

This woman and her husband love hosting family dinners

Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual image)

But when she realized that her fine china was mysteriously getting broken every time, she decided to find a solution

Image credits: Jean van der Meulen (not the actual image)

Image credits: amazon.com (not the actual image)

Image credits: babysharkplate

Unfortunately, conflicts between in-laws are incredibly common

We’re all familiar with the classic mother-in-law versus daughter-in-law drama. It’s a trope that we’ve seen played out in countless films and TV shows, and unfortunately, it’s prevalent in real life as well. In fact, 60% of married women admit that their spouse’s mom causes them stress. But in this case, it’s the sister-in-law who’s decided to create problems. This might stem from the fact that we’re engineered to act in the interest of our genetic kin no matter what, whether we’re a mother trying to protect our son or a sister trying to protect her brother. 

But there’s no need for there to be conflicts or tension between sisters-in-law. A woman and her sister-in-law might often be around the same age and both have the best interests of their sibling or partner in mind. They might first meet through their brother or spouse, but they can form a friendship on their own that can make them feel like the sisters they never had.

While The Knot recognizes that we won’t all be best friends with our sisters-in-law, there are a couple of things that can help strengthen our bonds with them. First, it’s important to give her the benefit of the doubt. Even if she may have said something that came off the wrong way when you first met or the two of you don’t have much in common at first glance, you’re going to be in each other’s lives for a very long time. So you might as well be kind and gentle with each other; don’t sweat the small stuff.

Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual image)

If you can’t be friends with your spouse’s family, it’s usually wise to at least be cordial

It’s also important to respect your partner’s relationship with their sister, even if you’re not best friends with her. Considering that 42% of married men and 46% of married women say they’re unsatisfied with their current relationships with their in-laws, it’s wise to keep an open mind and not put too much pressure on the relationship. Your partner loves their sister, and even if you won’t ever love her quite the same way, it’s important to try to understand why your spouse loves her so much. You don’t have to be best friends, but for everyone in the family’s sake, it’s helpful to be at the very least cordial.

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While we all hope that our in-laws are people we can easily grab a meal with or go shopping with without our partner being around, that’s just not always the case. And that’s fine, but when you find yourself dealing with a particularly toxic sister-in-law, it can be challenging trying to navigate your family life. So it’s important to be able to recognize when you have a family member who isn’t treating you fairly. According to PsychMechanics, some signs you might have a manipulative sister-in-law, for example, are her invading your privacy, being passive-aggressive, judging you, draining your resources, controlling your marriage, trying to turn your spouse against you, treating you like an outsider, or accusing you of manipulating your husband.

Image credits: August de Richelieu (not the actual image)

But if you have toxic in-laws, don’t hesitate to set boundaries and call out their behavior

So how can one go about keeping peace and harmony in the family when their sister-in-law seems to be trying to create conflicts at every turn? Sarah Kristenson at Happier Human recommends keeping your cool and creating boundaries to ensure that you can coexist without causing drama on every holiday and family gathering. Your boundaries can even extend to your partner, asking that they don’t discuss you with their sister, if there’s a conflict of interest. If your sister-in-law makes offensive comments or criticizes you, you can choose whether you’d like to ignore her or call her out. But remember to remain calm and simply explain why her words are hurtful.

If she’s trying to be nosy, don’t hesitate to change the subject or tell her that you don’t want to discuss such personal things. And if she’s always comparing herself to you, to try to put you down, remind her that you lead different lives and you don’t have to be the same. Just remember to tread lightly and try not to damage your relationship with your partner or the rest of the family. We would love to hear your thoughts on this story in the comments below, pandas. Have you ever had to deal with a difficult sister-in-law? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in reading another Bored Panda article featuring family drama, look no further than right here!        

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Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual image)

Many readers assured the woman that she had done nothing wrong by putting her sister-in-law on blast

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But others believed that she could have gone about it another way

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