When TikTok user Chloe (@chloe_beeee) served at a wedding, she unknowingly became the bride’s accomplice.
It was actually the first (and only) ceremony Chloe had worked at. So naturally, she was giving it her all, trying to do her best. However, Chloe accidentally spilled “a boat” of gravy onto the lap of the bride’s mother-in-law.
She was devastated. While the mother-in-law went home to change, Chloe cried her eyes out. She thought she had ruined the wedding.
But it couldn’t be further from the truth. The bride was so pleased with the incident, she gave Chloe a $75 tip and still says “Hi” every time they meet in the city.
To paraphrase James Gordon, Chloe was the hero the wedding deserved, but not the one it needed. Continue scrolling to learn why the bride was so happy with what had happened.
In general, it’s not appropriate for guests to wear white to a wedding
Image credits: chloe_beeee
Image credits: chloe_beeee
Michelle Lew of Lavender Crown Events, a wedding planning company servicing San Jose, Silicon Valley, and the surrounding areas, said the majority of brides still prefer a white or cream (ivory) dress. “With whites and creams as common traditions, a wedding is usually the special occasion that girls dream of and reserve the lighter colors for,” Lew told Bored Panda. But trends have been changing to include other colors too.
“Recently, there have been more and more brides going the non-traditional route in their planning and their dress! I’ve seen strong pinks and blues common for brides. At one wedding, the bride wore a gorgeous navy blue ballroom gown with her bridesmaids in cream. The ‘flip’ of colors was absolutely stunning!”
Michelle said that most of the time, the bride stands out and is the center of the event. So white is generally understood as a ‘no no’ color for guests to avoid clashing with the bride and stealing their spotlight. “Some brides don’t mind other guests or important family members wearing white, though I would certainly ask the bride for confirmation before buying anything white.”
But when TikTok user Chloe served at a wedding, the mom of the groom did wear white
Image credits: chloe_beeee
Image credits: chloe_beeee
Wedding planner Lisa Burton, who has over 14 years of experience throwing weddings abroad, agrees that at almost all weddings, only the bride wears white. “The only time I’ve witnessed differently is if the bride specifically sets a color theme or dress code for a wedding, for example, the bride and groom may ask everyone to wear a certain color,” Burton told Bored Panda. “We planned a wedding in Santorini where all the guests wore blue and white (the colors of the island), but even then only the bride wore all white. “
There is an exception to this. Burton highlighted that it’s common for the flower girl to wear white and almost match the bride in style too.
“I had a winter wedding and made the mistake of having my bridesmaids dress in white. This was before I started planning weddings and my slightly younger sister was mistaken as the bride a few times, fortunately not by the groom!”
So when Chloe accidentally spilled a boat of gravy on her lap
Image credits: chloe_beeee
Image credits: chloe_beeee
Jesse of Events By Jesse, a cool gang who offer custom wedding planning, coordinating, and creative services, said there is no more ‘typical’ in the wedding world. “I am seeing a trend of couple-only planning happen more and more, with parents only becoming involved at the wedding itself.” That being said, the groom’s mom still tends to be one of the more sensitive roles, as she doesn’t have to be too involved, but also doesn’t want to feel left out of the fun of planning.
“It truly depends on how the couple has decided to involve parents at all, and the relationship that the bride has with her future mother-in-law,” Jesse said. “I’ve seen great ones where the groom’s mom was more a mother to the bride than her own. I’ve also seen awful ones, where the bride was begging me to start the ceremony 10 minutes early because she was scared her mother-in-law was going to force the groom not to go through with it!”
According to Lew, the mother of the groom (MOTG) is important to the wedding and is typically in charge of planning the rehearsal dinner. Plus, the MOTG is usually responsible for special heirlooms or traditions to pass down through the groom’s side of the family. On the day-of, Lew also likes to incorporate the MOTG to have a larger role in the wedding by walking her son down the aisle and having a mother-son dance.
Judging from Chloe’s TikTok, this particular bride and her mother-in-law weren’t the best team at the wedding. But Lew said there are numerous ways to try and strengthen these relationships.
“It’s always great to include the MOTG with the bridal party with getting hair and makeup done together along with the mother of the bride (MOTB) and flower girls,” Michelle explained. “Helping the bride get ready can be a very intimate activity, so I always like to suggest that the MOTB helps with the dress and the MOTG helps with the veil. If the bride has a dress with a train, it’s always helpful to show both mothers how to bustle. The more help, the better!”
The bride was more than happy
Image credits: chloe_beeee
“Often couples will present gifts to the parents to thank them for their support. One of the most touching events is when each newlywed picks a special gift for the other’s parents. The groom’s parents have created many beautiful memories with their son, so in having the bride present her gifts to the groom’s parents (and vice versa with the groom and the bride’s parents), a new private connection is made between her and them.”
Burton also acknowledged the groom’s mom can really help the bride with her pre-wedding duties. “These can be extensive and so it really helps to lighten the bride’s load. Whereas the bride’s mom is involved directly with her daughter and bridesmaids, the groom’s mom can help hugely by managing the guest lists and overseeing the groom and groomsmen,” she explained.
“On the day itself, the bride’s mom usually gives her full attention to the bride, she is (in most cases) a calming presence for the bride. This means [the MOTG] can be a great help in getting to the venue early and overseeing arrangements, making sure suppliers arrive on time and everything is as it should be, and also welcoming guests as they arrive.”
You can listen to the entire story on TikTok
@chloe_beeee#stitch with @itsjuliannajennings #fyp #foryou #foryoupage #storytime #funny #wedding #motherinlaw♬ original sound – Chlo
At this point, it’s probably safe to say that most weddings in the near future will look different from what we’re used to. The pandemic is constantly rearranging everyone’s plans, so if you are also trying to get married, be prepared, follow the news closely, and maintain an open conversation with your vendors and guests.
“One thing we like to tell our clients is that it’s not a matter of if, just a matter of when,” Alison Laesser-Keck of Alison Bryan Destinations told BRIDES. “Your day will come, and trust us when we say it will be the most amazing thing. When we can all come together and celebrate, there will be nothing else like it.”
“We’ve definitely noticed a trend where people are excited about getting married again, yet they question whether or not they should be booking anything new,” Laesser-Keck explained. “It’s this weird in-between time where things still feel relatively uncertain and yet we all know the end of this pandemic is near. Unfortunately, whereas last year we thought those willing to take the risk were crazy, now we feel like if you’re not willing to lock something in soon, you’re probably not going to have the ‘dream team’ for your wedding in 2022 and will likely have to make some sacrifices (or wait until 2023).”
However, remember that if you don’t want the guests to wear white to your big day, it’s perfectly fine. As the couple, you set the tone.
Having that in mind, tons of couples are embracing the white-clad wedding party look or asking their parents to wear something that coordinates with their outfits.
Or, maybe you don’t even care if your guests wear white. Especially if you’re not wearing white yourself. Whatever the case may be, give your guests a heads-up and make the details clear. It really helps to smoothen things out.
Here’s what people think about the incident
I like the comment with the black wedding dress, it feels way more elegant than white ngl
Any dress can look elegant regardless of color, but personally I’d be spending the whole time terrified of spilling something on a white dress.
Load More Replies...It always creeps me out when MILs wear white to a wedding. WTF? That's just gross. You're not marrying your own son!
It's always the mother in-law that's super toxic and ruins the wedding! I hope I'm a good mother in-law to my kids if they get married ):
You’re halfway there if you’re wishing to be a good one.
Load More Replies...why are these posts always 95% big pictures of peoples close up face and Then the text in a not optimal way pasted over. you have the tik tok link always below
I'm the stereotypical stupid white male, so I apologize in advance - can someone explain to me why the MIL wearing white to a wedding is so bad? She's taking attention away from the bride... by wearing white? Is it also faux pas if the bride has a wedding dress that isn't white? Is it only a white DRESS, but maybe white pants or top is ok? I swear, honest questions - not trolling or flamebait or whatever.
I you live in a culture where brides traditionally wear white ( such as the US or the UK where this story takes place) it is considered incredible rude to wear an all or primarily white outfit. The bride wears white and stands out from the crowd a guest wearing white, especially a white dress is seen as trying to upstage the bride.
Load More Replies...Oh gosh if my (future) MIL wore white to my wedding I would be so unhappy but so unconfrontational dang it sounds awful, I'm sorry to everyone who has had that happen
I'm sure the bride got lots of hi-fives from her friends after telling them what you did. Do not feel bad for making that brides day better!
I truly don't understand why people get so upset over people wearing white. Believe me, no one is looking at your cousin, your sister or your mother in law because they are ALL looking at the beautiful couple. Why feed these narcissist the only food they crave? What they want is attention and the best thing you can do in this situation is not give it. My sister tried several ways to sabotage my wedding, even "forgot" to bring her shoes. She was Maid of Honor. Lol. Told her we could all walk down the aisle barefoot in solidarity. She was apoplectic and I was sipping tea, both literally and figuratively. I've been happily married 32 years, she has not.
Great story! I’m not sold on all the wedding traditions but I do think you shouldn’t go to a wedding if you can’t respect the couple’s wishes and traditions.
See, if I knew my MIL would be wearing white, I would invite ALL the matriarchs to wear white. Make a new family tradition. Make it a symbol of the transition from single status to marriage. Invite the MIL to stand as a bridesmaid as well as my own mother. Dumping gravy and these petty ugly actions will just make MIL an enemy, and its needless. If its drama she seeks, changing the ceremony will deflate the conflict. Giving her respect and honoring her will hopefully win you an ally, and if you plan on kids, having a MIL and FIL are extremely useful.
Nice theory but somehow you missed the post-incident handshake and tip. MIL already was the enemy, none of your story fits.
Load More Replies...SOmetimes I read hordes berserking against "rancid traditions" and sometimes, same people here at BP are defending to death those same "Rancid traditions". If you're able to find common factor, you'll understand why you get downvoted or even why you downvote. I'm simply tired of this sectarian NWO...
White is to signify virginity at a wedding. If you aren't a virgin, don't wear white at a wedding. Period. Also MIL wore white to be a bitch.
Cracks me up all these women wearing White as it is a sign of virginity... BS if you shack up with a guy you aint no virgin. LOL still on the lady spilling the gravy on the mother in law. What kind of sit down dinner has gravy?
question, why is wearing white disrespectful? (not ment in a rude and/or offensive way)
white is is the color that the bride chose to wear and it is an unspoken rule that you shouldn't wear it as if you were trying to outshine her
Load More Replies...A friend of mine told her mother that if she continues to turn up at the wedding wearing white then she will find and hold it at a nudist camp. Mother turned up in sky blue.
Interesting how we praise some traditions and vilify others. Who gives a F what color anyone's dress is
Because you're not supposed to try and outshine the bride and groom on their wedding day
Load More Replies...The headline says 75 dollars but then the story says 55. Which is it??
A wedding day IS the bride's day and it's etiquette the no one but the bride wears a white dress. Trying to ruin what should be a happy day for a couple makes you an utter lowlife.
Load More Replies...I like the comment with the black wedding dress, it feels way more elegant than white ngl
Any dress can look elegant regardless of color, but personally I’d be spending the whole time terrified of spilling something on a white dress.
Load More Replies...It always creeps me out when MILs wear white to a wedding. WTF? That's just gross. You're not marrying your own son!
It's always the mother in-law that's super toxic and ruins the wedding! I hope I'm a good mother in-law to my kids if they get married ):
You’re halfway there if you’re wishing to be a good one.
Load More Replies...why are these posts always 95% big pictures of peoples close up face and Then the text in a not optimal way pasted over. you have the tik tok link always below
I'm the stereotypical stupid white male, so I apologize in advance - can someone explain to me why the MIL wearing white to a wedding is so bad? She's taking attention away from the bride... by wearing white? Is it also faux pas if the bride has a wedding dress that isn't white? Is it only a white DRESS, but maybe white pants or top is ok? I swear, honest questions - not trolling or flamebait or whatever.
I you live in a culture where brides traditionally wear white ( such as the US or the UK where this story takes place) it is considered incredible rude to wear an all or primarily white outfit. The bride wears white and stands out from the crowd a guest wearing white, especially a white dress is seen as trying to upstage the bride.
Load More Replies...Oh gosh if my (future) MIL wore white to my wedding I would be so unhappy but so unconfrontational dang it sounds awful, I'm sorry to everyone who has had that happen
I'm sure the bride got lots of hi-fives from her friends after telling them what you did. Do not feel bad for making that brides day better!
I truly don't understand why people get so upset over people wearing white. Believe me, no one is looking at your cousin, your sister or your mother in law because they are ALL looking at the beautiful couple. Why feed these narcissist the only food they crave? What they want is attention and the best thing you can do in this situation is not give it. My sister tried several ways to sabotage my wedding, even "forgot" to bring her shoes. She was Maid of Honor. Lol. Told her we could all walk down the aisle barefoot in solidarity. She was apoplectic and I was sipping tea, both literally and figuratively. I've been happily married 32 years, she has not.
Great story! I’m not sold on all the wedding traditions but I do think you shouldn’t go to a wedding if you can’t respect the couple’s wishes and traditions.
See, if I knew my MIL would be wearing white, I would invite ALL the matriarchs to wear white. Make a new family tradition. Make it a symbol of the transition from single status to marriage. Invite the MIL to stand as a bridesmaid as well as my own mother. Dumping gravy and these petty ugly actions will just make MIL an enemy, and its needless. If its drama she seeks, changing the ceremony will deflate the conflict. Giving her respect and honoring her will hopefully win you an ally, and if you plan on kids, having a MIL and FIL are extremely useful.
Nice theory but somehow you missed the post-incident handshake and tip. MIL already was the enemy, none of your story fits.
Load More Replies...SOmetimes I read hordes berserking against "rancid traditions" and sometimes, same people here at BP are defending to death those same "Rancid traditions". If you're able to find common factor, you'll understand why you get downvoted or even why you downvote. I'm simply tired of this sectarian NWO...
White is to signify virginity at a wedding. If you aren't a virgin, don't wear white at a wedding. Period. Also MIL wore white to be a bitch.
Cracks me up all these women wearing White as it is a sign of virginity... BS if you shack up with a guy you aint no virgin. LOL still on the lady spilling the gravy on the mother in law. What kind of sit down dinner has gravy?
question, why is wearing white disrespectful? (not ment in a rude and/or offensive way)
white is is the color that the bride chose to wear and it is an unspoken rule that you shouldn't wear it as if you were trying to outshine her
Load More Replies...A friend of mine told her mother that if she continues to turn up at the wedding wearing white then she will find and hold it at a nudist camp. Mother turned up in sky blue.
Interesting how we praise some traditions and vilify others. Who gives a F what color anyone's dress is
Because you're not supposed to try and outshine the bride and groom on their wedding day
Load More Replies...The headline says 75 dollars but then the story says 55. Which is it??
A wedding day IS the bride's day and it's etiquette the no one but the bride wears a white dress. Trying to ruin what should be a happy day for a couple makes you an utter lowlife.
Load More Replies...
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