Why do we expect we'll be able to recall exactly how much milk we need as opposed to water?

That one colleague at work who doesn't take you seriously won't know what hit him when you deliver the epic speech you've been drafting and honing for months. Even if you never say any of it aloud, the fact that it is at least in your head is enough reward.

How much does reducing volume help parallel parking? One of the questions that we will never know the answer to.

At least you win every time.

You know when you're halfway done and realize you haven't given the masterpiece enough thought, so you have to start over? I've done this once three times in a row.

Did this happen to you before? You see a familiar face approaching, you cross your fingers in hopes that they don't notice you, quickly glance down at your phone and walk right by.

At the very least, pretend to read the terms of the user agreement on any website if someone is looking. Everyone simply presses the "I agree" button while no one is watching.

A second trip? Don't be ridiculous. It would be better to just simply hop inside the house while holding the milk between your knees and balancing an infinite amount of plastic bags on each arm.

Does it even matter if the change is correct? You are aware that there are carts in front of you and that you won't be the one holding up the line today.

Long phone conversations always necessitate a few excursions from the living room to the dining room, followed by a stop in the bedroom, before making your way back to the kitchen. We're not sure why. It is exercise, at least.

After work, you continued to order delivery, and before you knew it, the vegetables started to spoil.

Would it really be that horrible to just decline an offer by responding, "No thanks, I just want to stay home and watch reruns of the 10 shows I've seen before in my pajamas."

Everyone needs a little boost in self-esteem from time to time. Before you go anywhere, remind how nice, smart and worthy your pet is.

It's not that you don't care for your family and friends. However, you are not need to be there with them at all times.

Perhaps the tiny internet offers something more intresting or more authentic than what the larger internet does.

In the past, people used to read newspapers in the toilet. Nowadays, it's difficult to picture anyone using the restroom without a smartphone at the very least.

It is not your fault! For some reason, Doritos don't come with an emergency kill switch to close the bag before it's too late. The Godfather was playing on cable, the bag was on your lap, and it's a loooong movie.

You may not always be in the mood for an embarrassing circumstance like saying "excuse me" to a stranger so you can get a package of cauliflower rice. So you've spent your precious time learning everything you can about a jar of gherkins while you've been waiting for someone to move out of the way at the grocery store.

Why do we repeat committing the same mistake over and over again? You know what a headache could be a sign of, right? Every terrible sickness that is known to man!

About one million times per day, the typical person misplaces their phone. Most of us find that hilarious and frustrating at the same time, especially when we begin looking for it while it's still in our hands.

What is it about a cupcake or a handful of dry tortilla chips that makes you want to dance a little? You already know what you did!

Your smartphone obviously hates you and is acting rudely if it can't connect to the internet. When the printer decides to jam, it is doing it intentionally to complicate your life because it still harbors a secret vendetta against you. Technology frequently malfunctions on purpose, which causes us to lose control and lash out at inanimate objects.

You've undoubtedly also leaped on your bed to prevent the monster from your bed from grabbing your legs.

We've all been there: You smell something unsavory and become concerned that it might be you, so you nonchalantly raise your arm and angle your head to smell your pits. This tactic also functions when you are unsure of whether you have on deodorant.

You also have a unique ritual that involves a hot towel and a ton of lip balm. Until you go too far and start bleeding, it is always satisfying.

 
No one wants to sit next to a stranger, especially if there are other seats available, and if someone takes a seat in the seat next to us and we become uncomfortable enough to want to move, we'll wait a few minutes so they don't believe we're doing it because of them, even if we totally are.

It's probably playing the soundtrack of your own action-adventure film, in which you play the main character.

If you've ever gone shopping for clothing, furniture, or even food, you've likely experienced genuine sticker shock when you saw an item's exorbitant price. Instead of becoming alarmed and leaving, you remained for a short while while acting as though you were still debating whether or not to buy it. This allowed you to wait for your blood pressure to return to a more stable level.

Even a word for it exists: egosurfing. 47% of Americans who use the Internet have done a self-search, according to a survey.

We're all aware that listening in on someone else's talk isn't exactly polite, so why do people carry on such fascinating conversations in public if they don't want you to? You've undoubtedly had meals where you hardly spoke to your dining companion in favor of listening to the relationship drama of the couple behind you—and, of course, making mental notes in your head.

Nothing is more uncomfortable than hanging out by yourself at a busy restaurant or on a busy street corner while waiting for a friend who is always late.