That message is both heartbreaking and sweet.

Penny, Penny, Penny

When auto correct know you're a redneck

I wonder where violating a hippo is a thing! (Yes I know it's an autocorrect fail)

At least he's honest. This is why you always have emergency Styrofoam plates and plastic silverware.

A fullfilling day...

Midnight on Friday the 13th. Venus was in retrograde and there was a full moon.

It's going to be just fine.

If that's true she better know right away..

Has this awful roleplay shít *ever* worked?

Iwould like to see some idiot dressed as batman delivering food. And I would give a tip too.

UNALIVE ME 💀

I'm in

If only there was some way of colouring a person’s hair artificially. And if only this was widely available in all shops, and commonly practised by human adults. But, alas, this is not the case and the argument is watertight.

That is one aßshole landlord

Definitely going to try this... :D

Gone without a Trace

Oops.

take the hint leave them alone lol

guy dodged a bullet there

WTF?!

Hi *high

No Aaron, you're the cringe one here, a woman rejects you and then you start whining about how women are always choosing a-holes. Get a life.

Some of the drivers are real a$$es.

Torn between "don't catfish people" and "what a legend"

Well that wasn't what I expected 😮

It worked! :D

Google salmon shooter. It's a device to shoot salmon over a damn so they can finish their journey to spawn. Doesn't harm the fish.

I wonder if anyone felt like that when I was playing Farmville.

That is one hell of an autocorrect

Reply to dad: well, drag it out of there!

"So do I because you sound like the perfect man!"

Noooooooo!!!

My mom dated a guy who did not like music. The only movie he would watch was American Graffiti over and over. He tried to throw my mom in a tree once when he was upset. I am conviced bro was 100% an extraterrestrial. If someone does not like music be suspicious.

It kills me that guys actually say and do stupid stuff like this.

Oh well, at least the person suffering rough times knows who to not pay any more attention to before the REALLY break their heart.

This comment has been deleted.

A healthy relationship 💀

Hint hint hint

Friends forever!

Every single year

How does your phone hold texts for a year?

well it's not tomorrow yet.

It took me a few seconds!

Spoken like a true incel

TOEBEANS

Wtf

Are they made of cheese?

Whoever received this needs to run like they are being pursued by a bear.