Parents Refuse To Punish Son Who Hospitalized A Super Racist Pupil At School
If you remember, in the movie Captain America: Civil War, one important issue was raised which many viewers almost lost sight of, hidden by the large-scale and spectacular battles of superheroes. And the question is: how appropriate is it for people (or superheroes, it doesn’t matter) to take justice into their own hands?
Steve Rogers was sure that yes, Tony Stark was categorically against the usurpation of state functions. Most of the commenters on this post in the AITAH community on Reddit would seem to be in favor of Iron Man. However, jokes aside – after all, the issue that this post addresses is actually much more serious.
More info: Reddit
The author of the post has two kids and the eldest is a 15 Y.O. boy
Image credits: SOMANEDU (not the actual photo)
The author’s son has a bully in his class whose behavior is really out of any bounds
Image credits: u/[deleted]
The school administration was involved several times but this led actually to nothing
Image credits: Mikhail Nilov (not the actual photo)
Image credits: u/[deleted]
So recently the bully got beaten severely by some students – and the author’s son as well – ending up in the ICU
So, the Original Poster (OP) and her husband have two children, and the eldest of them, 15 Y.O., is in the same class as the local bully. At least, according to the author of the post, that student regularly insults other children, makes racist remarks, and generally behaves extremely aggressively.
The OP says that the school administration got involved several times, but everything was limited to two short-term suspensions for this student. Now we’ll no longer know what took place there: negligence of the school principal, unwillingness to take decisive measures or something else. The fact remains that the bully clearly felt his impunity.
And so, one fine day, after the bully shoved one girl in the locker room, her boyfriend fought him – and the girl’s defender was supported by a dozen other students. It took the intervention of several teachers to drag the fighting teenagers off, and in the confusion, several kids managed to escape unrecognized – especially since the cameras in the school are really poor.
The beating inflicted on the bully turned out to be serious – he ended up in the ICU, according to the OP’s words. And the next day, the parents learned with no less horror that their own son was among those participants in the fight who managed to escape. However, the boy was sincerely confident that he’d done the right thing – even despite the outcome of the fight.
And here the parents’ opinions differed – however, about whether it was worth punishing their son for fighting at all. The mother was sure that the bully got what he deserved, but the dad, considering how seriously the boy was beaten, insisted on punishment for his son. The parents probably didn’t even think about the fact that, given everything that has happened, a lawyer is more relevant for the teen than grounding or something of the sort.
Image credits: Lee Haywood (not the actual photo)
Well, the idea of vigilantism permeates our culture through and through (damn it, I can give you offhand a dozen films or books where the hero administers justice with their own hands, and not one where the hero simply goes to court and brings the matter to justice), so, school vigilantism is a fairly common thing nowadays.
As, unfortunately, is school bullying – just read this post of ours about a dad who recently was terrified by his teen son coming home from school with marks on his hand recording times he was bullied over just 2 days. It is obvious that teachers do not always deal with this problem, and students (and sometimes even parents themselves) take matters into their own hands. And often they only make things worse.
“Vigilante justice and revenge quests have an endless propensity to go wrong and can make matters worse for everyone involved,” BetterHelp psychological clinic’s official website claims. “In some cases, bullies target innocent children or other children because the bully was a victim of abuse or violence in the past. This could be motivated by revenge or an attempt to take back the power that was once stolen from them. Again, this does not excuse the behavior of hurting someone else but is merely an attempt to understand where this behavior could be coming from.”
But in the case we described, everything has already gone too far – and many commenters try to draw the original poster’s attention to this. “If that kid ends up disabled, or God forbid dies, whether or not he’s a racist, your son is on the hook for that,” someone wrote in the comments.
And there’s really nothing heroic here, the commenters are pretty sure. “People acting like the son is Batman or the Punisher. The son and others beat this guy so hard he’s in the ICU. He may die, never walk again, have permanent brain damage, etc.” another person in the comments ponders. “There are going to be lawsuits and investigations. What happened is absolutely not something to be proud of as a parent.”
Be that as it may, bullying at school is a serious problem of our time, as well as unreasonable vigilante justice, and our society has yet to find effective ways to solve these problems. By the way, what solutions do you, our dear readers, see here?
People in the comments tried to draw the parents’ attention to how inappropriate vigilantism actually is, and to probable consequences for their son too
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
Poll Question
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Hate me if you want, but there are times when violence is the answer. The kid defending his girlfriend was essentially acting in a sort of "self-defense." I'd be on board with that kids parents defending him. Buuuut the rest of the kids weren't trying to teach a lesson, or protect themselves. They were wanting revenge. A whole group on one kid, to that point, deserves some consequences.
Not vengeance but punishment. He cause as much painbto the kids in his school as they did to him. His rcist comments to one student could be felt by others of the same race as the student.
Load More Replies...The kid who fought back defending his girlfriend may be okay, the other kids, probably not. One could argue the first kid was acting in defense while the others were just piling on. The bully being a shithead doesn't change the fact that he's in the ICU and if this is from the states, which I'm suspecting it is, the parents could be looking down the barrel of a hefty hospital bill that they may sue the families of the attackers to pay off. OP is in some serious trouble
Axtually it would be rather hard seeing as this person was a constant bully, who the school did nothing about. In the end it would come down to them refusing to take any action resulting in the students doing what they had felt they needed to.
Load More Replies...YTA. Your son joined in with a mob of kids and put another kid in the ICU. The fact that that kid was a racist a*****e doesn't protect your son or the other attackers from prosecution. You need to get him counselling and anger management therapy, get him reading ethics, morality and law, and give him some perspective. Help him understand that anger can make you feel powerful and righteous, but anger lies. Anger takes away your judgement, and your control, it takes away your power. Give him guidence now, because this is not about bullying or racism anymore. This is about whether your son becomes the sort of man who pulls the mob back, and says "Let him up, he's had enough." or the the sort that stomps on someone's head and gets 25 to life.
Hate me if you want, but there are times when violence is the answer. The kid defending his girlfriend was essentially acting in a sort of "self-defense." I'd be on board with that kids parents defending him. Buuuut the rest of the kids weren't trying to teach a lesson, or protect themselves. They were wanting revenge. A whole group on one kid, to that point, deserves some consequences.
Not vengeance but punishment. He cause as much painbto the kids in his school as they did to him. His rcist comments to one student could be felt by others of the same race as the student.
Load More Replies...The kid who fought back defending his girlfriend may be okay, the other kids, probably not. One could argue the first kid was acting in defense while the others were just piling on. The bully being a shithead doesn't change the fact that he's in the ICU and if this is from the states, which I'm suspecting it is, the parents could be looking down the barrel of a hefty hospital bill that they may sue the families of the attackers to pay off. OP is in some serious trouble
Axtually it would be rather hard seeing as this person was a constant bully, who the school did nothing about. In the end it would come down to them refusing to take any action resulting in the students doing what they had felt they needed to.
Load More Replies...YTA. Your son joined in with a mob of kids and put another kid in the ICU. The fact that that kid was a racist a*****e doesn't protect your son or the other attackers from prosecution. You need to get him counselling and anger management therapy, get him reading ethics, morality and law, and give him some perspective. Help him understand that anger can make you feel powerful and righteous, but anger lies. Anger takes away your judgement, and your control, it takes away your power. Give him guidence now, because this is not about bullying or racism anymore. This is about whether your son becomes the sort of man who pulls the mob back, and says "Let him up, he's had enough." or the the sort that stomps on someone's head and gets 25 to life.
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