He finally found a mate and was able to produce offspring shortly before his death.

True Fact. Fortnite originated every phrase ever.

I think my IQ has dropped reading this thread.

Or perhaps it's because he's a Nice Guy™ who feels entitled to sex for showing basic decency?

Bad women for marrying for love! Thankfully there are these “able-bodied men” waiting in the wings who are willing to make you their “pretty wives.” *cringe*

What the actual f**k?

Ugh. That was a sad plot twist.

Such a nice guy.............

This guy: "I would respect those EL GEE BEE TEES if they didn't make it their entire personality and stopped shoving it down my throat!"

You mean there aren't dozens of hot singles in my area? :D

The last meme made me laugh.

On the bright side he learned a new skill

ngl, I'm feeling a bit of schadenfreude reading this xD

... Am I the only one getting some serious "We're meant to be together!!!" stalker vibes from this dude..?

Oof

She Did all the things you liked?🤢

They almost always say English only because most fans can understand it and there's always a bunch of dudes who think they can impress the model by using their native language. Also, has he never heard of Google Translate? lol.

oof

Tja, etzala vorgeführt.

Einfact

I’m fluent in German (don’t ask why, I learn languages when I’m bored) and I would never use it to speak to someone on onlyfans. 🙈

Entschuldigung bitte?

Your German was *that* bad. The Frence will bluntly tell you to speak English rather than butcher their beautiful language, but, the worst complainers really butcher the English language too.

She sounds like a regular See You Next Tuesday!

"A big fan of her work"? A porn actress?

Yikes. I hope the gf runs for the hills. This guy sounds scary controlling.

W. T. F!!!,

This is a SERIOUSLY disturbed man and Zoe should get a protection order ASAP. That boy gonna snap.

It's a stone fruit, meaning it has a single seed surrounded by an outer fleshy fruit. That kind of date?

If the guy took a picture of the delivery and fills out the form saying that the client was his/her ex, it might go the reverse with doordash suspending the ex's ability to use the app. LOL

Tell me this is a joke. Please.

need a therapist dude.

I am dating Natalie Portman, just so you guys know. She does not actually know this yet, I have not yet spoken to her, but these are just technicalities.

gives off lion/daddy energy, hurl!

It's like the women at hooters are there to earn a wage instead of having a special cuddle, hard to fathom.

Do you think this person might just be slightly fixated on sex?

totally not a creepy stalker.

"My indecision is final!"

Given the dates between his messages, this could be a practical joke.

That’s just cute

Yup, sure buddy, sounds like a totally genuine conversation, not an incels made up story.

When you mistake telling on yourself for a sick burn