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Mom Is Corrected On How To Pronounce Her Daughter’s Name, Tells Person They Ruined Her Life
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Mom Is Corrected On How To Pronounce Her Daughter’s Name, Tells Person They Ruined Her Life

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“What’s in a name?” Shakespeare asked in Romeo and Juliet. “That which we call a rose by any other name would smell just as sweet.” Well, maybe that works for roses, but not so much for people. Some parents can go a little overboard in picking a name that’s a tad bit “too special.”

This woman chose the name Gráinne for her daughter in honor of her great grandmother. And while that’s incredibly sweet, she didn’t exactly know the right pronunciation. So, when a stranger did tell her, she did what any well-adjusted adult would do: got embarrassed and started berating them.

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    The pronunciation of a child’s Irish name got two strangers into an awkward fight

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    The mother got mad at a stranger for correcting her daughter’s name pronunciation, claiming they “ruined her life”

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    Image credits: Pressmaster / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

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    An unusual name can have a negative impact on a person’s life

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    Unique names may sound nice, but they don’t always make the named person’s life easier. A 2012 study revealed that people trust strangers more if their names are easier to pronounce, even if they sound unusual to them. The lead author of the study Eryn Newman said: “In each experiment, strangers with easy-to-pronounce names were judged as being more familiar, more trustworthy and safer.”

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    What’s more, the pronunciation of a name also had a role in whether people viewed others as trustworthy. “People actually thought claims attributed to easy-to-pronounce names were more likely to be true,” Newman noted. Basically, people trust an Adrian Babashenko more than a Czeslaw Ratynska.

    But naming troubles don’t end here. Even if a kid’s name is easy to pronounce, its spelling can cause some issues too. Psychologist Jean Twenge claims that differently-spelled names are to blame for declining spelling and reading capabilities among U.S. children. “You have the child named Jennifer spelled with a ‘G’ — her teacher says ‘Are you sure your name is spelled that way?’ That can be incredibly hard on a person’s confidence,” she wrote.

    In some cases, an unusual or weirdly-spelled name can negatively affect a person’s career. One study found that recruiters favored those whose names were easy to spell over such as the poor Gráinne. “People with easier-to-pronounce surnames occupy higher status positions in law firms,” the authors stated.

    On the other hand, having a unique name can do wonders for a person’s self-esteem and creative thinking. There’s also almost a guarantee that people will remember you more easily. “[They’re] often easier for people to remember, and so they are likely to remember your name when they meet you for the first time (or at least remember that you had an unusual name),” Arthur Markman, PhD, told Yahoo Health.

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    The confusion around Irish names comes from their unique spelling

    Image credits: Nati Elena / pexels (not the actual photo)

    Irish people speak English, but why do Irish names seem so weird to us? That’s because, even if they’re spelled with letters from the Latin alphabet as English, they mean different sounds and have different pronunciations.

    The apostrophe above the “Á” means that it should be pronounced “long.” The symbol is a “síneadh fada” (literally meaning “a long stretch”) and signals to the speaker that the vowel is long. That’s how “Gráinne” becomes “Grawn-ya.” Sometimes, the name is spelled “Grania.”

    Irish language and culture expert Darach Ó Séaghdha has two possible explanations as to why the spelling and pronunciation of Irish names are so different. “Often, those names were popular before people knew how to spell,” he told CCN Travel. “A relatively old name like Meadhbh would have different versions because people spell it different ways.”

    Another is the modernization of the Irish alphabet. “There were different stages of spelling normalization in the Irish language. In the 1950s, they decided to kind of modernize the alphabet,” Ó Séaghdha explained. That’s when anglicized spellings took off.

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    It’s probably good to know how a name is spelled before giving it to your child. There’s nothing wrong with using Irish names, especially if they belonged to family members in the past. Still, a kid may need to carry that name for a long time before they’re able to change it.

    The author clarified that they weren’t looking to humiliate the mother or the daughter

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    Some people thought it was the mother’s fault for not educating herself

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    Others claimed OP was being a jerk, questioning what they were trying to achieve here

    Other netizens chastised both the author and the mother

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    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

    Read less »
    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Kornelija Viečaitė

    Writer, BoredPanda staff

    Hi there, fellow pandas! As a person (over)educated both in social sciences and literature, I'm most interested in how we connect and behave online (and sometimes in real life too.) The human experience is weird, so I try my best to put its peculiarities in writing. As a person who grew up chronically online, I now try to marry two sides of myself: the one who knows too much about MySpace, and the one who can't settle and needs to see every corner of the world.

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    Read more »

    I'm a visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

    Read less »

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Viktorija Ošikaitė

    Author, BoredPanda staff

    I'm a visual editor here at Bored Panda and I enjoy a good laugh. My work ranges from serious topics related to toxic work environments and relationship difficulties to humorous articles about online shopping fails and introvert memes. When I'm not at my work desk, checking if every single pixel is in the right place, I usually spend my free time playing board games, taking pictures, and watching documentaries

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    Space Invader
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Amazing how many people react with "People who know things should keep quiet about it so us ignoranuses may flaunt our ignorance with the untainted pride of the truly oblivious!'

    Jill Rhodry
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There is no excuse for ignorance in the age of technology.

    Matt Du
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I live is a small Welsh village and all of the pronunciation websites/youtube that tell you how to pronounce it are wrong. They tell you the English way and the Welsh to pronounce it, they even give five stars and pats on the back. But they are all wrong, I'm old and gray and pronounce it the same way my Grandmother did. There is a YouTube video of the headmaster of the local school 2 year ago pronouncing it the right way. I've sent it to all of the above, they didn't put it right. So, age of technology is only as right as the idiot in charge of it.

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    Schmebulock
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment has been deleted.

    Ash
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    respulero
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree, you can name your son whatever you want and pronounce it however you want. My son's name is Charles, pronounced pe-ter

    Abraxas59
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    im welsh lmao n icant say either way its spelt 😂i mean us welsh basically pull oads of letters out of a hat n make a word ni one else but us can pronounce 😂 irish is like us celtic and if you name you kids a clet name ffs learn how to bloody pronounce it seriously right 😂

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My Mam was a teacher. One of her colleagues was registering a new child in the school. His name was 'Gooey'. The teacher said, "That's an interesting name. I've not come across a Gooey before, could you spell it please." "G U Y." The parent had read it in q book, but had no idea how to pronounce it.

    Herringbone
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And when dear little Oat, Barley, whatever, goes to school and is addressed by a teacher who knows how to pronounce her name properly, she won't recognise herself.

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    Trillian
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So easy today to ruin a person's life. It used to be that you needed a whole villainous plot for that, now it's just a simple correction in pronunciation. Where is the challenge in that *sigh*

    Tabitha
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Always a good idea to research the proper meaning, spelling, and pronunciation of a name before saddling your child with it. That woman’s great grandmother is probably very angrily spinning in her grave at her namesake being called Grain because her great-granddaughter couldn’t be bothered to make sure she was pronouncing her name, and now her great-great-granddaughter’s name, correctly. Grain. What the actual f**k.

    XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦️️🇬🇧
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This made me chuckle because my actual name is Xanthippe. I have not a drop of Greek heritage, but mum liked it and made damn sure she knew how to spell/say it properly. I agree with some of the Pandas that mention how name spellings/ pronunciations get changed as people immigrate, but if you're doing it in tribute to someone, in this day & age knowledge is just a few keystrokes away. It took my less that 10 seconds to Google how to pronounce Gráinne.

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    Tomato Smudge
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know a guy whose name was given to him already mispronounced and later on he learned that but didn't care and so he still goes by the mispronunciation because it's his name tho it's usually an educational introduction when it comes to it.

    Kobe (she)
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just saying that a lot of so-called typical English names are actually Hebrew originated. ( read : almost all biblical names) Mispelled and mispronounced. But, I don't have a problem with that. That is just how language works....

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    EM
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm on OP's side, pretentious lore-dump or not. Living in a densely Irish-populated area with a name butchered like that will lead to bullying. Fsck the "it's none of your business" crowd. The parent was a fuckface moron for not bothering to learn how to pronounce the name SHE GAVE HER CHILD. Also, Grain is a stupid twat-a*s name from an ignorant American inbred. Hopefully the child grows up to learn about her heritage and not wallow in the ignorance of her mom.

    Cronecast AtTheRisingMoon
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm with you. I think that the OP sounds like she was trying to be kind and express interest in the child as a form of encouragement but that she's naturally a little bit pretentious and condescending...with good intent. But the kid was going to find out the "um...you are not pronouncing that in the traditional way" on the playground soon without the attempt to validate the choice. Realistically the child's mom was trying to honor her heritage and wildly overreacted to finding out she got it wrong. A long, long time ago my dad was substitute teaching in Appalachia before going overseas to get a doctorate at Trinity in Dublin and while calling roll said the name "Meredith" as it is typically pronounced Mare-ih-dith . He had to call it multiple times before a little girl raised her hand and started crying because she'd never heard her name pronounced that way and thought it was so pretty...as her family pronounced it Mare-ee-dith.

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    LandAhoy
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What I'm finding hard to fathom, is if the mum named her child after her great grandmother, then that would have been her parent's grandmother. How can she hear about her great grandmother Gráinne from either a grandparent or a parent, but not know its pronunciation? I've just realised, I don't know the names of my great grandparents, but I can ask my parents and they would know their names and how to say them.

    Richard Graham
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's pronounced "Comma-la". Like "comma" then "la". Last name "hair" then "is".

    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She's not ready to learn about new world immigrant surnames. Two of the most common options are new pronunciation of the old spelling and new spelling of the old pronunciation. Doesn't really ruin lives but genealogy is hard. That said, how did you not check? The kid is old enough to follow conversation - you had years!

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm being very, very cynically and I know it, but it really gets my goat if a child's life seems to be ruined and their existence obliterated according to a mother just because of a name! Of all the things that can and do happen to children, this is what you're concerned about? Not bullying, not abuse, not violence?? For God's sake, what are your priorities?

    Lisa T
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew someone who called their son “Sileas”. Supposed to be pronounced “shee-lis”, she pronounced it “Sil-ay-us”. Majority of people had no idea how to say it and it came out sounding like “silly a*s”

    arthbach
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sheelis is correct in Scottish Gaelic, although 8t more common for it to be used for girls rather than boys. In French, it sounds closer to 'silly a*s'. If 8 can across the name, I'd used the Gaelig for a girl, and the French for a boy.

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    D. Pitbull
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Anyone who said "YTA" to this person... wow. Just... wow. So ... this person decided not to be responsible about naming their child... **knew** it was a name that was not 'from here' so to speak (ie: she knew it was irish... and thought what? Nah, don't need to check... I know everything") - and then gets angry when someone tells her actual fact/truth that she herself didn't BOTHER to research? No... we shouldn't be crapping on the person who (very politely, it sounds like) told her the truth. Like... if I see your Chinese-character tattoo and tell you "I'm sorry, that says bbq-pork, not what you were told" *I* am the bad guy now? Seriously?

    Michael MacKinnon
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's an uncomfortable moment, but in a region where there's an Irish-speaking population, it's actually heading off problems in the future. Mom will now go online and practice the heck out of this.

    Amy S
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agreed, OP is in the UK so likely to meet many Irish people and people of Irish decent who'll know how to pronounce the name.

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    Hodge Elmwood
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminds me of all the girls named McKenna or McKenzie. The prefix Mc or Mac means "son of."

    Michelle Seasor
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's wrong to use a traditional name and not pronounce it correctly. The mother of the child should have known how to pronounce her daughter's name way before this incident

    Shadow
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment has been deleted.

    Karl
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She is on a hiding to nothing as the majority of people her daughter encounters throughout her life will use the correct pronunciation - making her look even more ignorant and stupid she’s already shown herself to be. Perhaps her purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others? Christ knows how she would have pronounced “Siobhan” 😀

    Melissa Harris
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If this woman and her daughter live in a part of the UK with a large Irish population the girl will go to school and people will look at her name written in Irish and pronounce it correctly. It's better the woman realizes she's miss pronouncing her daughter's name now so she can correct herself before a teacher with a pronounced Irish accent does it.

    lwolf1952
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My name is Edward but sometimes I pronounce it Yoodumass when I'm yelling at myself for screwing something up.

    Bob Brooce
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can name your kid damn near anything for all I care, although I may think it' stupid. The thing is, if you think it's a real name used by other people then there's a tiny little chance that it would be a good idea to make sure you know the usual pronunciation unless you're deliberately changing the pronunciation. FWIW. I once heard of a kid who was named "Eloise" because her mother *saw* the name and thought it was a good name to use. Either mom had never heard the name or simply didn't make the connection, because the kid's name was pronounced "ell-OYCE".

    UncleJohn3000
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Parents, stop trying to prove you're cool via your children's names.

    Ciaran McK
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Its more like gran-ya for context. Agreed if your not from here trying to pronunce some names would be an absolute shot in the dark for some people but generally we would never take offence unless someone was taking the p**s

    Cory Tollman
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My dad and I worked in the same department in a hospital for several years. One time my dad was present when one of our managers was updating a computer program that we both used. He ended up in an argument with the manager about how to spell my name, ending with "I named him". To be fair, my name had been spelled incorrectly in our main computer program and email previously so it made sense that our manager had seen that since it still popped up that way to other people while looking correct to me. Anyway, my dad and mother both thought it was totally worth me working in the same place as my dad just so he could clearly win a disagreement with this manager. :-D

    Jaguarundi
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew a woman who named her daughter Ceilidh and properly pronounced it "kei-li". Her poor daughter had one terrible time in school getting teachers to spell and pronounce her name correctly for the entire 12 years of her schooling in the US. I feel it too, since people can never remember how to pronounce my given name, despite it being only FOUR LETTERS! I am very tired of being called "Linda", "Lydia" and all sorts of other "L" names I could scream!

    FluffyDreg
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone: Gives proper context of the origin of the name and how its generally pronounced without shaming them for how they use it. People: How dare you share information I didn't know! You rude ahole you should know its NEVER okay to inform people who may or may not know something. Even when they ask!

    Marc Wilson
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A former colleague of mine, many years ago (pre-web) saw a job he fancied in the classifieds in "Computing". The ad listed a number and said to call Siobhan O'Kelly. He rang up and asked to speak to "Mr O'Kelly" - not only did he have not one clue as to how to pronounce it, he hadn't clocked it as a female name. His face was scarlet when he hung up. Oddly enough, some years later I got to meet her. Celtic names are much better known and understood these days.

    Display_Name
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I never know if Brianna is pronounced like it looks or if it's pronounced as Brionna.

    CBolt
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA - Did you even realize you have a superpower? You can destroy a child's self-esteem & ruin her life in only 3 - 4 minutes! Why didn't this *:_$; parent ask family members how her ancestor's name was to be pronounced? She probably wouldn't have liked "gron-yah." A former co-worker was named for her grandmother - Gesche - & her married surname was Italian, tho I'd never heard it before - began with "di." When I was told I'd be on her "team," I was dumbfounded, but was over it in abt 5 minutes. Unfortunately, I expect she went thru some aggravating experiences.

    Kellynn D
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    having an irish first name, myself, yep i feel this kid's future pain....

    Barry Disney
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Saoirse is the Irish word from freedom and is pronounced Seersha. It is also a girl's name. Saoirse Ronan , the actress pronounces it Sersha and Saoirse Monica Jackson pronounces it Seersha like the word. Nothing wrong with either name pronunciation, language evolves

    Barry Disney
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There are girls named Saoirse which is the Irish word for freedom which is pronounced Seersha, but there is a famous actress Saoirse Ronan whosse first name is pronounce Sersha and another famous actress Saoirse Monica Jackson whose name is pronounced Seesha

    AR
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA. Stop giving kids names from other languages if you’re not going to learn the correct pronunciation. Hell, my parents even got my name incorrect (it’s spelled in the Spanish form but they pronounced it the American way, I answer to both.)

    Daisy Elle
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So not one older family member told this woman that Granny's name wasn't actually pronounced 'Grain'?? Hmmm, I don't think so, they would have been falling over themselves to correct the Gaelge roots. At least it wasn't a difficult one like Caoilfhionn, Bláthnaid or Meadhbh!

    Siobhan Gournay
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm definitely with the OP here. My mother is Spanish (my father half Irish half French) but my mother took the time to learn about my name's history and how to pronounce it, and this was back in 1973! Look, someone was going to point it out- better in this way than a couple of years later at school which would be humiliating for the kid to say the least.

    Cora C
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Like how they had "The Feast of the Gods" in Paris 2024 opening ceremony and all these uncultured people thought it was "The Last Supper". Just judge them in silence and let them get laughed at. Don't waste your time.

    Kia Force
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I suspect this little girl will experience similar episodes as she grows up. It's an unusual name so people will ask about it and those on the know will probably correct her. The parents should have gotten more info before giving her the name. On the other hand the little girl will not be the only child with an unusual name. Modern parents are choosing names that make their children stand out. Nothing wrong with that.

    Christopher Crockett
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow... not just a helicopter mom, but probably owns a heavy lifter like a Sikorsky Skycrane. Reality is going to hit that kid like a killer asteroid someday. I've become so jaded at other peoples' colossal stupidity that I just shake my head and snicker.

    Your Mom
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    According to this, I assume that the lady pronounces her child's name as "grain", like "a single fruit or seed of a cereal." Even if she thinks it's her ancestor's name, this word means something in English. Pronouncing her name the same way as "a single fruit or seed of a cereal" already ruined her life, I think. This reminds me of an old and noble female first name, Leocadia, which was not popular, but existed in my country too. The cause of its extinction is that it's sounds in my language like if you make up a name meaning someone is throwing up on someone or something. "Leokád" literally means in my language "throwing up on something". Okay, grain is not as bad as Vomita, or Upthrower, but still. Kids will mock her in the school, and it's hard to take seriously a person named "a single fruit or seed of a cereal". So yes, little girl's life is already ruined.

    Abraxas59
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    im welsh lmao n can't say either way its spelt 😂i mean us welsh basically pull loads of letters out of a hat n make a word no one else but us can pronounce 😂 irish is like us celtic so do the same and if you name you kids a celt name ffs learn how to bloody pronounce it seriously no lovely ur not the ah that american one is know all know nothing most of em poor kid spell ithow its bloody said or dont even go there as someone else says educate yourself 🙄i blessed be

    Amelia Jade
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Names pronunciations can vary by country. It's common and not a big deal. Look at how we say Michael in the US vs how they pronounce it in Germany. Does that mean I'm saying it wrong in the US? Or that Germans are saying it wrong? No. It's just a difference in language.

    LinkTheHylian
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If they're really in the UK they'd know all Irish names are pronounced "Funny-talking F****r". Just kidding, Ireland. We love you. You gave us all that food that one time.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YTA. They can pronounce as “Kevin” if they want. Op and her partner are incredibly pompous.

    margaret carradus
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My daughter Sian spent a year at school with the teacher pronouncing it as Shawn. It really affected her badly. My grandson is Ioan. He just refuses to acknowledge people when they say his name wrongly. He says that isn't me. He is right. Names hold a power.

    Lea S.
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe you shouldn't have interfered with the mother's personal decision. First, you assumed with no evidence that she only picked the name because it was unique and special. As opposed to the person just liking the name or it being a family name. Then, you corrected the person who ASSIGNED THE NAME on how it's pronounced. In my country - the owner of the name can pronounce the name however they want. Are the laws of phonics/grammar sometimes abused? Sure - but that's their choice and there are no rules against it (where I'm at). The person who HAS THAT NAME is pronouncing it the way they want (sometimes tradition and logic be damned). That's how it works. You could've just minded your own business instead of saying something pointless/insulting and then trying to desperately apologize/backtrack. I *do* think the mother over-reacted a bit but maybe she was frustratedly trying to figure out why in the hell she was having this banal conversation where she had to defend her choices.

    PFD
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She thought "unique and special" having only *heard* the name (and hence understanding the daughter to have been named after wheat and barley). I'd have thought "classic hippy" myself. Which of course is how everyone else will interpret it in the kid's future. No one will *hear* "grain" and think "classic Irish meme", they'll just think "weird". This woman might be the first to leap to that conclusion but she won't be the last. As to "in your country", who cares? It's not in your country, the norms and expectations are different. Sure you can choose how your name is pronounced but you can't control how others will perceive it.

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    Funhog
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree with those who'd written that the mother should have researched how to pronounce her daughter's name properly, especially since the daughter is named for an ancestor. Though, Gráinne will surely be introduced at some point to the correct pronunciation of her name and will be able to decide for herself how she wants to be called... or, she may not care and won't mind either (or any) pronunciation. However, it wasn't OP's place to correct the mother, no matter how "gently" it was intended; there was zero tact to be had by OP. The mother's reaction was a bit over-the-top, but I imagine that it could have been out of exasperation to get OP to shut up after OP's "throwing out just about every positive reinforcement" after having over-stepped.

    PFD
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's a bit irrelevant. This is just going to be the first of literally hundreds or thousands of people Grain will meet who will think "weird hippy / American / influencer name" and then "huh? Why do you pronounce your name wrong?"

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    JammaCoast2Coast
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This obviously was a hill someone wanted to d*e on and sometimes it's just better to shut up.

    Rahul Pawa
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree with the ESH comments. The mother was totally overreacting, but also OP had no good reason to ask about how the child's name is spelled.

    Lea S.
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe you shouldn't have interfered. You assumed something about a complete stranger that you had no evidence for (she wanted to give her daughter a unique special name, as opposed to her liking the name or it being a family name). Then you told her how to pronounce it (at least in my country, you get to pronounce names how you want, how the OWNER of the name pronounces it, wins that argument). There was no reason for that and if you hadn't acted rudely you wouldn't have found yourself trying desperately to apologize and make up for it. I think the mother overreacted but, maybe she was just wondering why in the hell she was having this banal conversation.

    Slapdash1
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Screw them and everybody who looks like them. If they can't even bother how to pronounce some quirky name that they just HAVE TO give to their child then they deserve all the vexation they get. Screw the kid too, forgood measure. Probably a w!nker anyway.

    Space Invader
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Amazing how many people react with "People who know things should keep quiet about it so us ignoranuses may flaunt our ignorance with the untainted pride of the truly oblivious!'

    Jill Rhodry
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There is no excuse for ignorance in the age of technology.

    Matt Du
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I live is a small Welsh village and all of the pronunciation websites/youtube that tell you how to pronounce it are wrong. They tell you the English way and the Welsh to pronounce it, they even give five stars and pats on the back. But they are all wrong, I'm old and gray and pronounce it the same way my Grandmother did. There is a YouTube video of the headmaster of the local school 2 year ago pronouncing it the right way. I've sent it to all of the above, they didn't put it right. So, age of technology is only as right as the idiot in charge of it.

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    Schmebulock
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment has been deleted.

    Ash
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    respulero
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree, you can name your son whatever you want and pronounce it however you want. My son's name is Charles, pronounced pe-ter

    Abraxas59
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    im welsh lmao n icant say either way its spelt 😂i mean us welsh basically pull oads of letters out of a hat n make a word ni one else but us can pronounce 😂 irish is like us celtic and if you name you kids a clet name ffs learn how to bloody pronounce it seriously right 😂

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My Mam was a teacher. One of her colleagues was registering a new child in the school. His name was 'Gooey'. The teacher said, "That's an interesting name. I've not come across a Gooey before, could you spell it please." "G U Y." The parent had read it in q book, but had no idea how to pronounce it.

    Herringbone
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And when dear little Oat, Barley, whatever, goes to school and is addressed by a teacher who knows how to pronounce her name properly, she won't recognise herself.

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    Trillian
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So easy today to ruin a person's life. It used to be that you needed a whole villainous plot for that, now it's just a simple correction in pronunciation. Where is the challenge in that *sigh*

    Tabitha
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Always a good idea to research the proper meaning, spelling, and pronunciation of a name before saddling your child with it. That woman’s great grandmother is probably very angrily spinning in her grave at her namesake being called Grain because her great-granddaughter couldn’t be bothered to make sure she was pronouncing her name, and now her great-great-granddaughter’s name, correctly. Grain. What the actual f**k.

    XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦️️🇬🇧
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This made me chuckle because my actual name is Xanthippe. I have not a drop of Greek heritage, but mum liked it and made damn sure she knew how to spell/say it properly. I agree with some of the Pandas that mention how name spellings/ pronunciations get changed as people immigrate, but if you're doing it in tribute to someone, in this day & age knowledge is just a few keystrokes away. It took my less that 10 seconds to Google how to pronounce Gráinne.

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    Tomato Smudge
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know a guy whose name was given to him already mispronounced and later on he learned that but didn't care and so he still goes by the mispronunciation because it's his name tho it's usually an educational introduction when it comes to it.

    Kobe (she)
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just saying that a lot of so-called typical English names are actually Hebrew originated. ( read : almost all biblical names) Mispelled and mispronounced. But, I don't have a problem with that. That is just how language works....

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    EM
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm on OP's side, pretentious lore-dump or not. Living in a densely Irish-populated area with a name butchered like that will lead to bullying. Fsck the "it's none of your business" crowd. The parent was a fuckface moron for not bothering to learn how to pronounce the name SHE GAVE HER CHILD. Also, Grain is a stupid twat-a*s name from an ignorant American inbred. Hopefully the child grows up to learn about her heritage and not wallow in the ignorance of her mom.

    Cronecast AtTheRisingMoon
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm with you. I think that the OP sounds like she was trying to be kind and express interest in the child as a form of encouragement but that she's naturally a little bit pretentious and condescending...with good intent. But the kid was going to find out the "um...you are not pronouncing that in the traditional way" on the playground soon without the attempt to validate the choice. Realistically the child's mom was trying to honor her heritage and wildly overreacted to finding out she got it wrong. A long, long time ago my dad was substitute teaching in Appalachia before going overseas to get a doctorate at Trinity in Dublin and while calling roll said the name "Meredith" as it is typically pronounced Mare-ih-dith . He had to call it multiple times before a little girl raised her hand and started crying because she'd never heard her name pronounced that way and thought it was so pretty...as her family pronounced it Mare-ee-dith.

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    LandAhoy
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What I'm finding hard to fathom, is if the mum named her child after her great grandmother, then that would have been her parent's grandmother. How can she hear about her great grandmother Gráinne from either a grandparent or a parent, but not know its pronunciation? I've just realised, I don't know the names of my great grandparents, but I can ask my parents and they would know their names and how to say them.

    Richard Graham
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's pronounced "Comma-la". Like "comma" then "la". Last name "hair" then "is".

    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She's not ready to learn about new world immigrant surnames. Two of the most common options are new pronunciation of the old spelling and new spelling of the old pronunciation. Doesn't really ruin lives but genealogy is hard. That said, how did you not check? The kid is old enough to follow conversation - you had years!

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm being very, very cynically and I know it, but it really gets my goat if a child's life seems to be ruined and their existence obliterated according to a mother just because of a name! Of all the things that can and do happen to children, this is what you're concerned about? Not bullying, not abuse, not violence?? For God's sake, what are your priorities?

    Lisa T
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew someone who called their son “Sileas”. Supposed to be pronounced “shee-lis”, she pronounced it “Sil-ay-us”. Majority of people had no idea how to say it and it came out sounding like “silly a*s”

    arthbach
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sheelis is correct in Scottish Gaelic, although 8t more common for it to be used for girls rather than boys. In French, it sounds closer to 'silly a*s'. If 8 can across the name, I'd used the Gaelig for a girl, and the French for a boy.

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    D. Pitbull
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Anyone who said "YTA" to this person... wow. Just... wow. So ... this person decided not to be responsible about naming their child... **knew** it was a name that was not 'from here' so to speak (ie: she knew it was irish... and thought what? Nah, don't need to check... I know everything") - and then gets angry when someone tells her actual fact/truth that she herself didn't BOTHER to research? No... we shouldn't be crapping on the person who (very politely, it sounds like) told her the truth. Like... if I see your Chinese-character tattoo and tell you "I'm sorry, that says bbq-pork, not what you were told" *I* am the bad guy now? Seriously?

    Michael MacKinnon
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's an uncomfortable moment, but in a region where there's an Irish-speaking population, it's actually heading off problems in the future. Mom will now go online and practice the heck out of this.

    Amy S
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agreed, OP is in the UK so likely to meet many Irish people and people of Irish decent who'll know how to pronounce the name.

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    Hodge Elmwood
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminds me of all the girls named McKenna or McKenzie. The prefix Mc or Mac means "son of."

    Michelle Seasor
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's wrong to use a traditional name and not pronounce it correctly. The mother of the child should have known how to pronounce her daughter's name way before this incident

    Shadow
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment has been deleted.

    Karl
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She is on a hiding to nothing as the majority of people her daughter encounters throughout her life will use the correct pronunciation - making her look even more ignorant and stupid she’s already shown herself to be. Perhaps her purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others? Christ knows how she would have pronounced “Siobhan” 😀

    Melissa Harris
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If this woman and her daughter live in a part of the UK with a large Irish population the girl will go to school and people will look at her name written in Irish and pronounce it correctly. It's better the woman realizes she's miss pronouncing her daughter's name now so she can correct herself before a teacher with a pronounced Irish accent does it.

    lwolf1952
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My name is Edward but sometimes I pronounce it Yoodumass when I'm yelling at myself for screwing something up.

    Bob Brooce
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can name your kid damn near anything for all I care, although I may think it' stupid. The thing is, if you think it's a real name used by other people then there's a tiny little chance that it would be a good idea to make sure you know the usual pronunciation unless you're deliberately changing the pronunciation. FWIW. I once heard of a kid who was named "Eloise" because her mother *saw* the name and thought it was a good name to use. Either mom had never heard the name or simply didn't make the connection, because the kid's name was pronounced "ell-OYCE".

    UncleJohn3000
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Parents, stop trying to prove you're cool via your children's names.

    Ciaran McK
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Its more like gran-ya for context. Agreed if your not from here trying to pronunce some names would be an absolute shot in the dark for some people but generally we would never take offence unless someone was taking the p**s

    Cory Tollman
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My dad and I worked in the same department in a hospital for several years. One time my dad was present when one of our managers was updating a computer program that we both used. He ended up in an argument with the manager about how to spell my name, ending with "I named him". To be fair, my name had been spelled incorrectly in our main computer program and email previously so it made sense that our manager had seen that since it still popped up that way to other people while looking correct to me. Anyway, my dad and mother both thought it was totally worth me working in the same place as my dad just so he could clearly win a disagreement with this manager. :-D

    Jaguarundi
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew a woman who named her daughter Ceilidh and properly pronounced it "kei-li". Her poor daughter had one terrible time in school getting teachers to spell and pronounce her name correctly for the entire 12 years of her schooling in the US. I feel it too, since people can never remember how to pronounce my given name, despite it being only FOUR LETTERS! I am very tired of being called "Linda", "Lydia" and all sorts of other "L" names I could scream!

    FluffyDreg
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone: Gives proper context of the origin of the name and how its generally pronounced without shaming them for how they use it. People: How dare you share information I didn't know! You rude ahole you should know its NEVER okay to inform people who may or may not know something. Even when they ask!

    Marc Wilson
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A former colleague of mine, many years ago (pre-web) saw a job he fancied in the classifieds in "Computing". The ad listed a number and said to call Siobhan O'Kelly. He rang up and asked to speak to "Mr O'Kelly" - not only did he have not one clue as to how to pronounce it, he hadn't clocked it as a female name. His face was scarlet when he hung up. Oddly enough, some years later I got to meet her. Celtic names are much better known and understood these days.

    Display_Name
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I never know if Brianna is pronounced like it looks or if it's pronounced as Brionna.

    CBolt
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA - Did you even realize you have a superpower? You can destroy a child's self-esteem & ruin her life in only 3 - 4 minutes! Why didn't this *:_$; parent ask family members how her ancestor's name was to be pronounced? She probably wouldn't have liked "gron-yah." A former co-worker was named for her grandmother - Gesche - & her married surname was Italian, tho I'd never heard it before - began with "di." When I was told I'd be on her "team," I was dumbfounded, but was over it in abt 5 minutes. Unfortunately, I expect she went thru some aggravating experiences.

    Kellynn D
    Community Member
    1 month ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    having an irish first name, myself, yep i feel this kid's future pain....

    Barry Disney
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Saoirse is the Irish word from freedom and is pronounced Seersha. It is also a girl's name. Saoirse Ronan , the actress pronounces it Sersha and Saoirse Monica Jackson pronounces it Seersha like the word. Nothing wrong with either name pronunciation, language evolves

    Barry Disney
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There are girls named Saoirse which is the Irish word for freedom which is pronounced Seersha, but there is a famous actress Saoirse Ronan whosse first name is pronounce Sersha and another famous actress Saoirse Monica Jackson whose name is pronounced Seesha

    AR
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NTA. Stop giving kids names from other languages if you’re not going to learn the correct pronunciation. Hell, my parents even got my name incorrect (it’s spelled in the Spanish form but they pronounced it the American way, I answer to both.)

    Daisy Elle
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So not one older family member told this woman that Granny's name wasn't actually pronounced 'Grain'?? Hmmm, I don't think so, they would have been falling over themselves to correct the Gaelge roots. At least it wasn't a difficult one like Caoilfhionn, Bláthnaid or Meadhbh!

    Siobhan Gournay
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm definitely with the OP here. My mother is Spanish (my father half Irish half French) but my mother took the time to learn about my name's history and how to pronounce it, and this was back in 1973! Look, someone was going to point it out- better in this way than a couple of years later at school which would be humiliating for the kid to say the least.

    Cora C
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Like how they had "The Feast of the Gods" in Paris 2024 opening ceremony and all these uncultured people thought it was "The Last Supper". Just judge them in silence and let them get laughed at. Don't waste your time.

    Kia Force
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I suspect this little girl will experience similar episodes as she grows up. It's an unusual name so people will ask about it and those on the know will probably correct her. The parents should have gotten more info before giving her the name. On the other hand the little girl will not be the only child with an unusual name. Modern parents are choosing names that make their children stand out. Nothing wrong with that.

    Christopher Crockett
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow... not just a helicopter mom, but probably owns a heavy lifter like a Sikorsky Skycrane. Reality is going to hit that kid like a killer asteroid someday. I've become so jaded at other peoples' colossal stupidity that I just shake my head and snicker.

    Your Mom
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    According to this, I assume that the lady pronounces her child's name as "grain", like "a single fruit or seed of a cereal." Even if she thinks it's her ancestor's name, this word means something in English. Pronouncing her name the same way as "a single fruit or seed of a cereal" already ruined her life, I think. This reminds me of an old and noble female first name, Leocadia, which was not popular, but existed in my country too. The cause of its extinction is that it's sounds in my language like if you make up a name meaning someone is throwing up on someone or something. "Leokád" literally means in my language "throwing up on something". Okay, grain is not as bad as Vomita, or Upthrower, but still. Kids will mock her in the school, and it's hard to take seriously a person named "a single fruit or seed of a cereal". So yes, little girl's life is already ruined.

    Abraxas59
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    im welsh lmao n can't say either way its spelt 😂i mean us welsh basically pull loads of letters out of a hat n make a word no one else but us can pronounce 😂 irish is like us celtic so do the same and if you name you kids a celt name ffs learn how to bloody pronounce it seriously no lovely ur not the ah that american one is know all know nothing most of em poor kid spell ithow its bloody said or dont even go there as someone else says educate yourself 🙄i blessed be

    Amelia Jade
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Names pronunciations can vary by country. It's common and not a big deal. Look at how we say Michael in the US vs how they pronounce it in Germany. Does that mean I'm saying it wrong in the US? Or that Germans are saying it wrong? No. It's just a difference in language.

    LinkTheHylian
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If they're really in the UK they'd know all Irish names are pronounced "Funny-talking F****r". Just kidding, Ireland. We love you. You gave us all that food that one time.

    The Starsong Princess
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    YTA. They can pronounce as “Kevin” if they want. Op and her partner are incredibly pompous.

    margaret carradus
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My daughter Sian spent a year at school with the teacher pronouncing it as Shawn. It really affected her badly. My grandson is Ioan. He just refuses to acknowledge people when they say his name wrongly. He says that isn't me. He is right. Names hold a power.

    Lea S.
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe you shouldn't have interfered with the mother's personal decision. First, you assumed with no evidence that she only picked the name because it was unique and special. As opposed to the person just liking the name or it being a family name. Then, you corrected the person who ASSIGNED THE NAME on how it's pronounced. In my country - the owner of the name can pronounce the name however they want. Are the laws of phonics/grammar sometimes abused? Sure - but that's their choice and there are no rules against it (where I'm at). The person who HAS THAT NAME is pronouncing it the way they want (sometimes tradition and logic be damned). That's how it works. You could've just minded your own business instead of saying something pointless/insulting and then trying to desperately apologize/backtrack. I *do* think the mother over-reacted a bit but maybe she was frustratedly trying to figure out why in the hell she was having this banal conversation where she had to defend her choices.

    PFD
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She thought "unique and special" having only *heard* the name (and hence understanding the daughter to have been named after wheat and barley). I'd have thought "classic hippy" myself. Which of course is how everyone else will interpret it in the kid's future. No one will *hear* "grain" and think "classic Irish meme", they'll just think "weird". This woman might be the first to leap to that conclusion but she won't be the last. As to "in your country", who cares? It's not in your country, the norms and expectations are different. Sure you can choose how your name is pronounced but you can't control how others will perceive it.

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    Funhog
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree with those who'd written that the mother should have researched how to pronounce her daughter's name properly, especially since the daughter is named for an ancestor. Though, Gráinne will surely be introduced at some point to the correct pronunciation of her name and will be able to decide for herself how she wants to be called... or, she may not care and won't mind either (or any) pronunciation. However, it wasn't OP's place to correct the mother, no matter how "gently" it was intended; there was zero tact to be had by OP. The mother's reaction was a bit over-the-top, but I imagine that it could have been out of exasperation to get OP to shut up after OP's "throwing out just about every positive reinforcement" after having over-stepped.

    PFD
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's a bit irrelevant. This is just going to be the first of literally hundreds or thousands of people Grain will meet who will think "weird hippy / American / influencer name" and then "huh? Why do you pronounce your name wrong?"

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    JammaCoast2Coast
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This obviously was a hill someone wanted to d*e on and sometimes it's just better to shut up.

    Rahul Pawa
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree with the ESH comments. The mother was totally overreacting, but also OP had no good reason to ask about how the child's name is spelled.

    Lea S.
    Community Member
    2 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe you shouldn't have interfered. You assumed something about a complete stranger that you had no evidence for (she wanted to give her daughter a unique special name, as opposed to her liking the name or it being a family name). Then you told her how to pronounce it (at least in my country, you get to pronounce names how you want, how the OWNER of the name pronounces it, wins that argument). There was no reason for that and if you hadn't acted rudely you wouldn't have found yourself trying desperately to apologize and make up for it. I think the mother overreacted but, maybe she was just wondering why in the hell she was having this banal conversation.

    Slapdash1
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Screw them and everybody who looks like them. If they can't even bother how to pronounce some quirky name that they just HAVE TO give to their child then they deserve all the vexation they get. Screw the kid too, forgood measure. Probably a w!nker anyway.

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