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“911, what's your emergency?" Police dispatchers face a lot of stress in their professional lives. Not only do they have to quickly help people who are in need of help or are panicking, but they also need to make hard decisions under pressure. While also learning not to bring their jobs back home with them because, unfortunately, they can’t have closure on all the calls that they take.
However, for some people, calling 911 operators is a joke or a game or they simply don't know better. Reddit users who work as police dispatchers shared some of the most ridiculous, the dumbest non-emergency calls they’ve gotten over the years. And they’re as frustrating as they are funny.
Scroll down for the best of the worst stories. And make sure to read Bored Panda’s interview with a psychotherapist about the type of stress emergency services operators face while on the job, how not to bring that stress home from work, and why people call them when they don’t have emergencies. According to her, when people understand that their jobs are meaningful, they’re much more resilient to the stress they face.
And remember… call the police when there’s an actual emergency, not because you have nothing better to do. Oh, and a quick reminder that you call 911 to reach the emergency services in the United States, Canada, and Mexico. The number is 999 or 112 in the United Kingdom, 112 in many other parts of Europe, and can vary from country to country around the world.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
My grandma used to call 911 to have the fire department bring her milk (she lived next to the fire department). She did this multiple times. Eventually, the fire chief gave her his direct line and he brought her milk until she came to live with us. She passed away in 2004.
My grandma was in early stages of dementia when this was happening, and it was a small town fire dept with a chief who had known her 30 years.
Bored Panda reached out to a psychotherapist based in Lithuania for a chat about police operators and dealing with the stress of the job. She preferred to remain anonymous because of how sensitive her work is.
“People working in emergency services are usually trained on how to react. The entire process usually has a very clear algorithm of actions, the call is standardized and streamlined as much as possible,” she said. “When you clearly know how to act, there’s a bit less stress.”
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#2
This guy calls early in the morning to report a forest fire. He goes on saying it’s getting closer and then goes silent. He then said never mind. The forest fire was the sun coming up. He admitted that he normally isn’t up at this early in the morning.
#3
CALLER: There is a shark in the ocean.
ME: Yes, ma'am, that is where we keep them.
Marcellus II 2 years ago
It's guarding my extensive collection of shells which I keep near there.
“Usually, stress arises from confusion, a lack of clarity, as well as either too few or too many choices,” the expert told us.
“If an operator is facing a very difficult situation, they can reduce their stress levels with the help of their colleagues,” she said that the dispatcher can ask their coworkers or supervisor for help or redirect the call to specialized services like firefighters or emergency medical services.
According to the psychotherapist, having clear boundaries and responsibilities both help 911 operators from bringing their jobs and the stress back home with them.
#4
Reporting the moon missing.
Imagine having so much faith in your local police department that you think they can recover the moon.
Serial pacifist 2 years ago
The police performed a mooning in order to restore public peace...and moon.
#5
When my daughter was 5 she spent a week with my dad. He gave her an old iPhone to play with. He said he got a kick out of it bc she has been “fake talking” to someone all week. Well towards the end of the week she handed the phone to him and he played along and said hello. It was a 911 operator! She had been calling all week to chat with them. They weren’t mad but wanted to let my dad know that out of service iphones can still call 911.
#6
Bloke rang in a panic and said he was being burgled. Had walked to the bathroom in the middle of the night and seen a guy on the landing. Sprinted back to his bedroom and rang the police. 3 cop cars and a dog unit speed over to his house and do a sweep of the house. Couldn’t find anything. When one cop asked him where he’d seen this guy he showed him the hallway which had a very large full sized mirror at the end. Turns out the guy had seen his own reflection in the dark.
“You have to clarify which actions were taken to give help to others and what is beyond the competence of the operator. It’s also important to vent the emotions that you feel at work,” she urged dispatchers to speak about the difficulties of the job with their other colleagues. If that’s not possible to do, it’s vital that they seek help outside the workplace and speak to a psychologist.
“Two of the most important factors that help maintain psychological resilience are: the support given by loved ones and colleagues, and the existence of a safe social space to speak about hardships,” she told Bored Panda.
“It’s only natural that when you react to dramatic and tragic events, you face emotions like anxiety, anger, a sense of hopelessness, and others. The job of a dispatcher brings with it various psychological challenges, so it’s important to ensure that the people who take up this calling don’t just use up their personal resources but also manage to recharge them.”
#7
My wonderful nephew who has physical and intellectual disabilities called 911 because the cat stole his piece of chicken. Because he can't really speak they must have heard basically grunts and groans as he tried to tell his story.
They got to his house and found out everything was okay and he enjoyed the attention from the officers who responded. Unfortunately they had to teach him to NOT call 911 after that because he called three or four times after the first time because he wanted to see his new 'friends'.
#8
Dispatched for a 200 sq mile district with under 70k people, so even the main city wasn't very densely populated. Got a call one night on 911 from a guy who wanted animal control dispatched. Convo went like this:
Caller: There's a racoon!
Me: Where is the racoon? (Thinking we might be able to send someone if it's trapped inside or something)
Caller: In my front yard! He's in the tree!
Me: I think that's where racoon live, sir.
Caller: But I live in the city! Racoons can't live in the city!
Me:........ I dont think the racoon can read the city limits sign.
#9
One caller was concerned for his safety when going outside his house because the neighbor a couple of houses down had his table saw out in his garage and he was afraid the wind would blow the blade over to his house and injure him.
Some ways to recharge include developing high-quality social relationships, hobbies that bring enjoyment (e.g. drawing, music, various sports), and having the support of the workplace which can organize supervisory groups, seminars, and provide access to wellbeing consultants.
We also asked the psychotherapist to comment on the fact that some people call police dispatchers without any emergencies in mind. “I’d call that a plea for help, just directed to the wrong address,” she said.
“Odds are that the caller is having a rough time. A large number of them are probably kids or teenagers who aren’t being taken care of by their parents. Or people who have problems with staying sober,” the expert said that these people have a need for attention and to be taken care of.
#10
Had a guy call, in a serious panic, saying someone was trying to break into his house. He sounded super panicked, anxious. I heard loud knocking through the phone. The caller also threw in "I pay your f**king taxes now SEND THE F**KING COPS, I DON'T WANT TO DIE", etc... I could hear that constant loud door banging and a muffled voice. The guy then throws in "I just had pizza delivered here, and now I have someone trying to break into my house!!"... and then I could hear through the phone, the delivery guy say "sir, you forgot your change!", over and over. That was back in 2009 and still bothers me at the utter stupidity.
#11
Got a call for a rat running around a shelf in the callers room.
Keep in mind - I take my job seriously. Everyone’s call is an emergency to them, I’ll respect that. This is the only call I’ve almost broke on and laughed. She had a thick accent and was on the verge of tears - and I was struggling to understand her. Eventually, after much confusion, she spells out M O U S E and mimics a mouse laugh (something like MA HEHEHEHEHEHEH) and I about lost it, I had to mute my phone and stand up. The mouse impression was like nothing I’ve ever heard, just so visceral and out of left field.
She was so afraid of this mouse though, we did send over an officer to clear the house for her. I stayed on the phone with her until responders arrived and comforted her, ensuring this wasn’t a dumb call to make, and that our officers would be happy to help.
#12
Someone called to tell us we don't need to use lights and sirens at night on our emergency vehicles because it woke up their baby.
Ryan-James O'Driscoll 2 years ago
People complain to the air ambulance about being disturbed at night. Some people are just so wrapped up in their own little world.
According to her, sometimes even when people directly express these needs, they still don’t necessarily have them taken care of. “However, when they get in touch with emergency services, they feel like they’re being listened to. Sometimes, even an entire team of people reacts to a single person’s problems. It might be that these callers do need (a different kind of) help, but they’re lost or don’t know better and try to look for solutions by calling emergency services.”
#13
Calls 911 from a pay phone.
“911, what’s your emergency?”
“I don’t have an emergency. I didn’t have quarter and I want to talk to a cop.”
“Do you have $699.75?”
“Huh? What are you talking about?”
“Sir, 911 is for emergencies. You can be fined for misusing 911.”
“Are you gonna get me a f**king cop or not?”
“Sure.”
Yeh. He got the fine for it.
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
Good. It's all well and good helping out old people or children, or people with disabilities, who don't understand what an emergency is, but adults who should know better have to be fined.
#14
Dude called 911 because he got off a train at the wrong stop and was broke. Honestly it wasn't even his predicament so much as he was absolutely obnoxious about it, even called 911 severel more times after I had already told him officers were en route. Annoying that he's tying up a line for medical emergencies, but that being said i'm going to preach a little: If you honestly think you may have an emergency but aren't sure if it "qualifies" for 911 use, don't worry about it and just do it. All emergency services personnel would much rather have much ado about nothing than have something terrible happen when it could have been prevented. This goes for all types of emergencies/situations.
Luther von Wolfen 2 years ago
I work in a homeless shelter. Guests sometimes call 911 for non-emergencies. One guy called and wanted the police to come because we wouldn't let him sleep on the floor. They came, talked to him for a bit and then took him for psych eval. I really appreciate the emergency services people who come here and deal with our guests.
#15
CALLER: I want to report a robbery.
ME: Tell me what happened.
CALLER: I am at Burger King and I ordered 6 chicken nuggets but they only gave me 5.
#16
Caller: The doors to the Circle K are locked and I don’t see anyone inside. They are supposed to be open 24/7.
Me: Sometimes they do that when they need to use the restroom. Just give it a couple of minutes.
Caller: I’ve been standing out here for 10 minutes!
Me: Sometimes it’s more than pee.
Vanessa Richardson 2 years ago
This one isn’t so bad—something could have happened to the clerk.. like, who’s to say they aren’t tied up in the walk-in after a robbery or something? Then again, this guy could have just been impatient. Lol
#17
Tons of calls about people being the "wrong" race in their neighborhood.
Chicken Nugget 2 years ago
It's so sad how, almost 150 years after the emancipation proclamation and 50 years after the civil rights movements, people can still be this racist.
#18
Frantic Caller: "I want to report a suspicious male!"
Me: "Ok, where is he?" (gets location) "What makes him suspicious?"
Caller: "Well he's walking down the street carrying a dangerous weapon!"
Me: "What kind of weapon does he have and what is he doing with it?"
Caller: "HE HAS A SNAKE. IT...IT'S AROUND HIS NECK! SOMEONE SHOULD DO SOMETHING!"
Me: "....Ma'am, a snake is not a weapon nor is it illegal."
AnnaBanana 2 years ago
Being from Australia, I'd argue that snakes could be classed as a weapon!
#19
Guy called 911 before because he ordered a Filet-O-Fish from the drive-thru at McDonald’s and it had ketchup on it.
He was adamant about wanting the police to show up…His “argument” was that he worked at McDonald’s when he was 16 and you don’t put ketchup on Filet-O-Fish.
He got the police alright…and a DUI charge.
#20
Had a guy call at like 3am, whispering. He and his wife had stayed up drinking, she had passed out on top of him, and he couldn't get up. And could barely breathe. She was 400lbs+ and he was 150.
They had just moved from out of state, and he didn't remember his address. And couldn't reach any pieces of mail. And was calling from a cell phone (in the days before smart phones).
That was a fun one to figure out.
#21
CALLER: There is this light in the sky, out over the harbor.
ME: (looking out the window from which I can see the area). Sir, that is the moon.
#22
Me: 9-1-1, police, fire, ambulance.
"Police! Send the f**king cops to **address** now, there's a serious emergency". Silence. Then suddenly I hear tons of laughter, from grown adults. "Hahahaha, don't actually send the cops, this is just a joke". I also heard in the background "I can't believe he really did it!". The cops were already dispatched and by the time they got to the house they were not amused.
WilvanderHeijden 2 years ago
Again, fine them with ridiculous fines. "Here sir, a $700 fine for abuse of the emergency number.... Just kidding, it's a $7000 fine. Do call us again...."
#23
Two women called screaming so violently I was convinced they were being mauled or murdered. Their neighbors ferret slipped under the door to their apartment.
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
I freak out when my mum's ferret comes near me, but I would never call emergency. It would be nice if mum listened to my panic and shut it away when I came over though...
#24
Ambulance dispatch. Called for us to hand them the remote from across the living room. Yeah.
#25
Caller: I’d like to report a suspicious person.
Operator: Ok, what does he look like?
Caller: he’s wearing X and he’s black
Operator: Ok, what is he doing that’s suspicious?
Caller: nothing but he just looks really suspicious.
Turns out he’s just a man walking.
#26
911 education day at elementary schools were the worst because around 3:30 the phones would light up with kids testing to see if it really worked.
But my favorite 911 of all time:
Frightened Teenaged Boy: Um, yes, I was, uh, having sex with my girlfriend and the, uh, condom came off and she, uh, she still has it. Um, inside.
Bob D. Lin Quint 2 years ago
"Sir, I know this gonna sound gross, but.... You might have to stick your finger in there."
#27
On the iPhone you can snooze your alarm by pressing the lock button, coincidentally you can also call 911 by pressing the lock button multiple times, I’ve done this twice now and both times the guy on the line laughed at me.
#28
911 call for Foreign Body in the abdomen... belly button lint, it was blue belly button lint.
#29
Caller: I had a lady friend over, I went to get us drinks, there was $400 on my dresser, now she's gone and so is the money.
Me: (trying to get a description) what was her name, do you know where she lives, etc since he opened with saying he knew her
Caller: ughhhhh um I'm not really sure. I can't remember
Me: You don't know your "friends" name? (Awkward pause) do you want to find out and call back?
#30
Ran out of beer at house party and to save anyone drunk driving, could we deliver some.
#31
Karens not getting their way. One lady wanted to speak to officers because the people she was harassing were "sassy" with her... Officer told her that being sassy is not against the law lol Another guy called in about employees calling his girlfriend fat and telling them to leave the store. His full grown girlfriend was trying to ride in the small store cart and employees said she was too big for it and to get out of it or leave the store. A male Karen called approx 20 times in a few hour span screaming about a home coming dance music and that he pays taxes and they shouldn't be allowed to have dances and other nonsense.
#32
Didn't like the way the neighbors threw out their garbage.
Chicken Nugget 2 years ago
to be honest, leaving trash bags open will cause raccoons. My neighbor (whose communal trash can thing is in my backyard) once caused a raccoon infestation in my attic.
#33
Asking what the number to 911 is.
Serial pacifist 2 years ago
Now, sir, calm down and follow my instructions: Take the stapler off the table and apply it gently to your forehead. You should hear a hissing sound of the air coming out of your empty skull which will relieve the pressure and anxiety you are feeling.
#34
Parents who call on children for not listening or throwing tantrums. I mean kids 6 and under. Had a guy call 3 times in a night for his son and he got mad at me for telling him to use the non emergency number and not 911.
#35
Someone called 9-1-1 to report "a stranger called me a b**ch at the train station". My colleague had to inform the caller that namecalling isn't a crime.
What do you think ?
Smilejustbecause 2 years ago
I used to work next to 911 dispatch and now working for the Emergency room hospital, you hear and see it all 😂
Memere 2 years ago
Oh, I can imagine! My mom was a nurse for over 40 years, and wow, some of the stories she had from working in ER, and even other departments - humans are just flat out crazy.
Load More Replies...
glowworm2 2 years ago
I always loved the story of the woman who called 911 because a deputy had arrived at her house for a noise complaint and she thought he was cute, so she called up asking for him again. She wound up getting a date- a court date. Here's the link: https://www.nbcnews.com/id/wbna13862689
D K 2 years ago (edited)
I’ve lived in the San Francisco Bay Area for most of my life. About 7-8 years ago I remember a particular tremor (earthquake) happening around 4 am. It was just strong enough to wake me up, but not enough to get me out of bed. The next day I read on the news that 9-11 was flooded with phone calls of panicked people, saying “there’s been an earthquake” and “what should we do???” Then I realized just how many transplants have arrived to the Bay Area over the years.
Smilejustbecause 2 years ago
I used to work next to 911 dispatch and now working for the Emergency room hospital, you hear and see it all 😂
Memere 2 years ago
Oh, I can imagine! My mom was a nurse for over 40 years, and wow, some of the stories she had from working in ER, and even other departments - humans are just flat out crazy.
Load More Replies... glowworm2 2 years ago
I always loved the story of the woman who called 911 because a deputy had arrived at her house for a noise complaint and she thought he was cute, so she called up asking for him again. She wound up getting a date- a court date. Here's the link: https://www.nbcnews.com/id/wbna13862689
D K 2 years ago (edited)
I’ve lived in the San Francisco Bay Area for most of my life. About 7-8 years ago I remember a particular tremor (earthquake) happening around 4 am. It was just strong enough to wake me up, but not enough to get me out of bed. The next day I read on the news that 9-11 was flooded with phone calls of panicked people, saying “there’s been an earthquake” and “what should we do???” Then I realized just how many transplants have arrived to the Bay Area over the years.
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