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“Looking For A Man In Finance”: 30 Ridiculous Dating Preferences People Actually Had
Interview
Most people might complain how much dating sucks, but they still do it. According to the Pew Research Center, three in 10 Americans are single, and 51% are looking for a committed relationship or casual dating.
It's natural to have some kind of an idea what person you'd like to date. You may want your values to align, maybe you'd like them to listen to the same music and like similar films as you. Others have preferences about their potential partner's looks, consciously or unconsciously.
But some demands people in the dating world can seriously veer into the absurd. Knowing and having experienced that firsthand, one person online asked others: "What's the most ridiculous dating preference you've heard of?" And people's answers perfectly illustrate the hell that is modern dating.
We also reached out to the person who started this thread, u/Urjanhai. They kindly agree to tell Bored Panda what inspired it and have a chat with us about why modern dating seems to be so difficult at the moment. Read our conversation below!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Having an active social media presence.
Multiple people tell me that my choice not to use social media was a huge red flag, but in reality I got rid of my accounts because they were making me miserable. I got rid of my Facebook/Instagram/twitter accounts two years ago, and have been noticeably happier ever since.
Green Tree 4 months ago
LOL my partner and I are opposite and it was a huge plus to both of us that the other felt the same. No facebook et al in this house
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#2
Not the most ridiculous, but I got a good laugh when my friend said he wanted to set his dating profile to exclude girls with small dogs that can’t breathe well.
#3
I have a roommate who is destined to be single forever.
His preferences and is not open to any changes.
Must be shorter than he is. Blond, Blue or Green Eyes. Virgin (and preferably never been kissed). Slim but not too muscular. enjoys doing household "duties". Full Time employment with benefits and retirement savings. No drinking alcohol, caffeine or sugary sodas. must have sense of humor and laugh at his jokes. Must want 3 children. Must be financially set and planning for the future.
He is a 46 year old (suspected Virgin) 5'6" tall, balding, pudgy, evening desk clerk at 2 star hotel, smokes shitons of weed and drinks a 12 pack of light beer daily. Has no hobbies but getting drunk and staring at things. Literally dresses and looks like a person you would not introduce your kids to and no way would you ever leave them with him.
It's sad that he doesn't see how sad he is and thinks it's normal.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
You could make a movie about this guy. A sad cringy movie that would be a cult classic decades after it was made.
The urge to ask others about the most ridiculous dating preferences they've encountered was inspired by the Redditor's own experiences. "I presented this question to Redditors due to having encountered individuals with absolutely mind-boggling and illogical preferences and standards. I was curious to know just how far this phenomenon has gone."
Brazilian researchers have found that even in 2024, people say kindness and intelligence are the most valued traits they look for in a partner. "This is true for both men and women and across the sexual orientation spectrum – although heterosexual men do place a premium on their partner's physical attractiveness," said the study's author, Joao Francisco Goes Braga Takayanagi of the University of Sao Paulo.
#4
A woman I knew mentioned she was looking for a man who made “at least $500k/yr” and was also an artist type and not a workaholic. I was like I think those items are in conflict sweet thang.
Sue Denham 4 months ago
No, no. I think that's entirely possible as long as you don't want to throw words like "honest" and "legal" into the mix.
#5
I met a 49 year old man who outright refused to date any women over the age of 30.
He was single, in case you're wondering.
#6
I only Date men who like to be covered in dog hair, every day of there life
Because I am always covered in dog hair.
The most ridiculous dating preference u/Urjanhai's ever experienced was about cars. "Probably the most ridiculous preference was based on what car the man drives. I've seen countless women wanting to date a man who drives a specific brand of cars."
"[The] most ridiculous part of that is that the car brands in question were not even the fancy types like Lamborghinis, etc. No, these women wanted Volvos," the Redditor said in disbelief. "No matter how trashy the car itself was, as long as it's a Volvo, it was okay."
#7
Obese People that refuse to date other obese people while simultaneously claiming that being larger is more sexually appealing.
#9
Dude wanted a Japanese woman who spoke Spanish and cooked Mexican food .
Kristy Marion 4 months ago (edited)
Will they settle for Peruvian food? Second largest Japanese population in Sth America
u/Urjanhai thinks that the increasingly silly demands from people in dating have to do with social media. "I believe this phenomenon is tied to social media and how impressionable people have come."
"Some people adopt their dating preferences from social media if those preferences are popular. It's like wanting to fit in with people you don't know and likely won't ever even meet in real life. Social media has warped people's perception of real-life social dynamics. In a way, they have lost a chunk of their sense of reality, which definitely is alarming," the netizen tells us.
#10
My friend claims to only want to date Japanese girls, despite not living in Japan or any community with a Japanese population. Furthermore, he has never even met a Japanese girl. His opinion is based solely on watching anime.
#11
Only dating people with a specific astrological sign or birthdate.
#12
I work with someone who only wants to marry someone from her church. Not her faith - Her physical church of 20 people.
#13
All these "tradcon" dudes want a woman to be a virginal and demure "saving herself for marriage". HOWEVER, as soon as you start dating them, they immediately want the woman to start putting out.
#14
I once made a rule that I would no longer date men who didn't have some type of window decor. Curtains, blinds, shades, etc. Blankets, sheets, or flags tacked up over a window didn't count.
I don't know why I consider this a sign of maturity, I just do. Maybe I was just tired of the frat boy type.
#15
Had a work colleague reject a guy because he had a desktop PC.
In hindsight, the dude dodged a bullet.
#16
Specific race, specific piercing, fat a*s, short curly bouncy hair, freckles, must have athletic/fit body, no social media, no Twitch/YouTuber, no guy friends but he can have girls that are friends, I can go on and on. You MUST be okay with hypocritical views/double standards for him.
I’m not making this s**t up. Dude thinking there’s some “build a b***h workshop” out there.
Edit: Thank you to the kind and generous Redditor for awarding me some 💩.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
I'm sensing a trend in some of these. "no Twitch/YouTuber, no guy friends but he can have girls that are friends". That's some groomer shite. isolate and exploit. It's how cults work.
#17
I once heard someone insist their date must have the same brand of toothpaste preference. Like, seriously? It's about compatibility, not dental hygiene uniformity.
#18
A buddy of mine said he only wanted to date Korean girls. One of our mutual friends at college tried to set him up with her roommate, who was an exchange student from Korea. The next day she asked him if they were gonna see each other again and he said no, she didn’t fit his “standards”.
Turns out the only Korean women he wanted were Kpop idols.
#19
I dated a girl who full out admitted that she was dating me (a POC) to look progressive.
#20
I've known a couple of guys who always complained about girls not being interested in short guys, yet would never consider dating someone even slightly taller them them😅.
Red PANda (she/they) 4 months ago
I like dating guys taller than me, and I’m quite short so it’s never been a problem. However, I’m not opposed to dating a short guy. I try to value personality above all things.
#21
There's this one girl I repeatedly see on dating sites so she's been on there a long time, as have I. Nothing really wrong with her looks wise, but she is in her 30s and she makes it very clear she's still a virgin.
She wants a guy who is also a virgin, doesn't watch [adult videos] and won't even entertain dating any guy that drinks or smokes even sometimes. And on top of that doesn't want some Mormon or otherwise religious/conservative guy, since she's not religious/conservative herself.
Like, lady, what planet are you on?
Becca not Becky 4 months ago
She probably grew up in a highly Mormon/religious/conservative area and liked the people but didn't want to continue in the culture. I've met a few people like that.
#22
I once heard of a guy who abruptly ended a date because she couldn't get through a sentence without using the word "like" several times.
>!It was me.!
#23
I heard about someone who refused to date anyone who didn't have at least ten houseplants.
#24
Girl I knew only dated guys with trucks, due to masculinity. Straight up said she couldn't take a guy who drove a woman's car seriously to do a man's role in her life. Guy she wound up with was shorter than average, small and scrawny, worked an office job, and was pretty much the opposite of the big burly masculine type, but he drove a truck. I found that so, so odd. I flip cars so what I drive can change on a daily basis, I can't imagine that being a dealbreaker for someone.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 4 months ago
Man she would hate my bike riding a*s. BTW bike riders have the best butts and killer endurance. Do what you will with this information.
#25
Met a woman who confessed her hobby (restoring old cars) repulsed most men because "not a feminine activity".
*Au contraire*, I thought it was attractive as hell, and we had lenghty conversations where I did some researches, asked questions, listen her talk about her passion.
She ended our exchanges when I casually told her I wasn't proficient with tools and tinkering (outside computers), her justification being "a manly man knows how to use tools".
#27
This is a friend of mine’s preference and I’ll say it in her own words
A tall Asian guy who has a Black guy’s physique who’s also great at dancing reggaeton and bachata.
Shark Lady 4 months ago
This is weirdly specific, I wonder if any of their past boyfriends have ticked all boxes
#28
Know a girl who broke up with a guy because he didn’t read the Bible enough he read it once a day but she reads it three times a day.
#29
I once knew a woman who wouldn't date a guy because the back of his head was too flat.
#30
Some girl on tiktok was talking about this guy she met who only dated women with lip filler? Because he believed that meant they had money. 😂😂😂😂.
What do you think ?
Pittsburgh rare 4 months ago
And here I am, aiming at someone with a pulse, teeth and without a criminal record.
MonsterMum 4 months ago
I've not used online dating and am in a long-term relationship, but my important preference is that they like cats.
Guy Bare 4 months ago
They don't know they like cats until they adopt one 😋
Load More Replies... Not-a-Clue (she/her) 4 months ago
Back in the dark ages before online dating sites existed, and I was quite happy being single, a friend made me make a list of things I'd want in an ideal man. It ended up being a load of very specific, strange & often incompatible requirements, including taste in music, particular authors he would read etc. Total fantasy. Anyway, fast forward a few months & he turned up. (The only box he didn't tick was being a bit on the tall side for my preference.) We've been happily married for over 20 years.
Pittsburgh rare 4 months ago
The ones I despise the most, because they're in my demographic, are the midlife crisis dudes Leonardo di Caprying on dating apps.
censorshipsucks 4 months ago
worked for me, tbh. No regrets. Things are going well. two years in so far.
Load More Replies...
Raquel Mencke 4 months ago
I think people set up such specifics because they truly don't want to be in a relationship or they REALLY do not know themselves.
Vinnie 4 months ago
The movie "The Wedding Banquet" starts with a gay man having to go on a date with a woman because his parents managed to actually find "an opera singer who is 5'9", has two PhDs, and speak five languages".
Load More Replies...
Andy Frobig 4 months ago
My bank once called and asked if I had paid for match.com and Christian Mingle and I said no, that's definitely fraud. I would settle for someone who isn't too good for me, but they keep getting their parole denied
Vinnie 4 months ago (edited)
One of my friends dated a string of neurotic women which messed him up. I finally thought of something: this white left-wing Ashkenazi Jew speaks very good Spanish, was head of the El Salvador Committee in university, has been to several Latin American countries, and gets along really well with Latin Americans. And that was the rationale I gave him when I told him. "Only date Latin American women." He only dated two because the second one became his wife. The first of the two women ended up dating only Ashkenazi Jewish men. I bumped into her a few years later, we talked about dating patterns, and she laughed and said, "I have one, too!" and pointed to her husband, an Ashkenazi Jew.
Allison Herb 4 months ago
All just excuses for being undatable with fragile egos who cant handle the truth.
frank behnsen 4 months ago
Aaah, it’s so relaxing not being on the dating circuit anymore! “No, ma’am.” (Al Bundy) };^>
Super Beast 4 months ago
My profile said I don't date straight people. I still got a lot of straight guys. (Trans guy, had top surgery, no T)
Guess Undheit 4 months ago
And ~~~I~~~ get called "difficult" for refusing to date smokers. (Note: There is no such thing as an "ex-smoker", they just go a long time between.)
Vinnie 4 months ago
That's fine if you refuse to date anyone who used to smoke. Enjoying your own company beats lying awake and wondering when they're going to light up again. I've been suffering from the suspense and speculation for a few decades now. (Okay, okay, I actually don't. I have better things to worry about)
Load More Replies...
Maria Pais 4 months ago (edited)
I know someone who's non-negotiables were that the guy had to be a practising Catholic, had to have a PhD, had to live on his own, didn't drink, didn't smoke, wanted children, and a couple other minor requisites like being at most 5 years older than her. Met someone that ticked all the boxes, they've been married for 20 years, have 4 children, perfectly happy. So, it happens.
Pittsburgh rare 4 months ago
And here I am, aiming at someone with a pulse, teeth and without a criminal record.
MonsterMum 4 months ago
I've not used online dating and am in a long-term relationship, but my important preference is that they like cats.
Guy Bare 4 months ago
They don't know they like cats until they adopt one 😋
Load More Replies... Not-a-Clue (she/her) 4 months ago
Back in the dark ages before online dating sites existed, and I was quite happy being single, a friend made me make a list of things I'd want in an ideal man. It ended up being a load of very specific, strange & often incompatible requirements, including taste in music, particular authors he would read etc. Total fantasy. Anyway, fast forward a few months & he turned up. (The only box he didn't tick was being a bit on the tall side for my preference.) We've been happily married for over 20 years.
Pittsburgh rare 4 months ago
The ones I despise the most, because they're in my demographic, are the midlife crisis dudes Leonardo di Caprying on dating apps.
censorshipsucks 4 months ago
worked for me, tbh. No regrets. Things are going well. two years in so far.
Load More Replies... Raquel Mencke 4 months ago
I think people set up such specifics because they truly don't want to be in a relationship or they REALLY do not know themselves.
Vinnie 4 months ago
The movie "The Wedding Banquet" starts with a gay man having to go on a date with a woman because his parents managed to actually find "an opera singer who is 5'9", has two PhDs, and speak five languages".
Load More Replies... Andy Frobig 4 months ago
My bank once called and asked if I had paid for match.com and Christian Mingle and I said no, that's definitely fraud. I would settle for someone who isn't too good for me, but they keep getting their parole denied
Vinnie 4 months ago (edited)
One of my friends dated a string of neurotic women which messed him up. I finally thought of something: this white left-wing Ashkenazi Jew speaks very good Spanish, was head of the El Salvador Committee in university, has been to several Latin American countries, and gets along really well with Latin Americans. And that was the rationale I gave him when I told him. "Only date Latin American women." He only dated two because the second one became his wife. The first of the two women ended up dating only Ashkenazi Jewish men. I bumped into her a few years later, we talked about dating patterns, and she laughed and said, "I have one, too!" and pointed to her husband, an Ashkenazi Jew.
Allison Herb 4 months ago
All just excuses for being undatable with fragile egos who cant handle the truth.
frank behnsen 4 months ago
Aaah, it’s so relaxing not being on the dating circuit anymore! “No, ma’am.” (Al Bundy) };^>
Super Beast 4 months ago
My profile said I don't date straight people. I still got a lot of straight guys. (Trans guy, had top surgery, no T)
Guess Undheit 4 months ago
And ~~~I~~~ get called "difficult" for refusing to date smokers. (Note: There is no such thing as an "ex-smoker", they just go a long time between.)
Vinnie 4 months ago
That's fine if you refuse to date anyone who used to smoke. Enjoying your own company beats lying awake and wondering when they're going to light up again. I've been suffering from the suspense and speculation for a few decades now. (Okay, okay, I actually don't. I have better things to worry about)
Load More Replies... Maria Pais 4 months ago (edited)
I know someone who's non-negotiables were that the guy had to be a practising Catholic, had to have a PhD, had to live on his own, didn't drink, didn't smoke, wanted children, and a couple other minor requisites like being at most 5 years older than her. Met someone that ticked all the boxes, they've been married for 20 years, have 4 children, perfectly happy. So, it happens.
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