Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
Planning a trip with a friend is always exciting, but it doesn’t come without risks. Just like moving in with a loved one, it’s impossible to know what exactly their living and traveling habits are like until you experience them first hand. And sometimes, to avoid ruining the relationship altogether, the most mature choice is deciding that traveling with one another isn’t wise.
But after one woman tried to explain that to a childhood friend, she found herself being accused of displaying ableist behavior. Below, you’ll find the full story that was recently shared on Reddit, as well as some of the replies invested readers left.
RELATED:
After taking a trip with a childhood friend, this woman decided it would be best if that was their last vacation together
Image credits: Ketut Subiyanto (not the actual photo)
But her friend didn’t seem to understand, and instead accused her of discrimination
Image credits: Marcus Aurelius (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Subject_Shoulder_538
Traveling can be challenging for anyone, especially for those who live with a disability
Traveling can be stressful for anyone, but for the 1.3 billion people on the planet who live with a disability, it can be even more difficult. Unfortunately, the government and businesses don’t always make travels simpler for disabled individuals, The Points Guy reports. 72% of adults with disabilities say they’ve experienced major obstacles with airlines, and 65% report having issues with airports in general.
For example, there can be long queues for wheelchairs or wheelchair assistance, and when individuals bring their own chairs, they’re often mishandled by airline staff and returned damaged. Going to the toilet can also be an issue while flying, as maneuvering to and from teeny tiny airplane lavatories can be nearly impossible for some individuals. Even hotels can be laughable when it comes to disability access, as the bathrooms are sometimes too narrow for wheelchairs as well.
In this particular story, the woman noted that her friend has fibromyalgia. According to the National Institute of Arthritis and Musculoskeletal and Skin Diseases, fibromyalgia is a “chronic (long-lasting) disorder that causes pain and tenderness throughout the body, as well as fatigue and trouble sleeping.” So there’s no question that the increased walking many of us do while traveling can take a toll on someone with fibromyalgia much more quickly than it will on someone who doesn’t have a disability.
Image credits: Daniel Frese (not the actual photo)
But there are ways to plan ahead and minimize pain when on vacation
However, there are ways to prepare for trips to ensure that fibromyalgia doesn’t get in the way of having a great time. PassportHealth recommends planning ahead, wearing comfortable clothes, getting extra sleep and making sure that individuals just don’t stop moving to minimize fibromyalgia symptoms while traveling. Anticipate your needs, such as any medication and heating/cooling products you need to bring, and start your journey well rested.
The Fibro Clinic reiterates on their site that keeping active can be an important way to mitigate pain. They recommend doing daily stretches and/or light exercises to keep your body loose, and scheduling in rest periods when necessary. This might mean stopping for a coffee break and a gentle stretch or stopping for a healthy snack to ensure your energy levels don’t get too low. It’s also wise to plan comfortable transport. You may prefer bus over train or vice versa, so don’t forget to look up your journey ahead of time.
Image credits: Timur Weber (not the actual photo)
Even if someone is your best friend, they might not be the best travel companion
While the woman who shared this story is sympathetic to her friend’s physical needs, the real problem she had with their travels had nothing to do with her disability. Sometimes, we learn that we’re just not travel-compatible with friends, and that’s okay. If one person wants to spend all day in museums and buy cheap meals at the grocery store, while the other would rather walk around the city then spend their whole budget on nice restaurants, it might be challenging to plan out the entire trip.
According to Flash Pack, it’s simply not always wise to travel with our friends. We might be scared of hurting their feelings if we want to go our separate ways for the day, and it can be stressful if one person is exhausted, while the other wants to keep sightseeing into the night. You may also be comfortable enough around each other to get crabby and hangry and end up bickering or offending your friend the same way siblings do while on family vacations. If you’ve realized that taking another trip with a loved one just isn’t worth the stress and hassle, that’s a boundary you should feel comfortable setting.
We would love to hear your thoughts on this story in the comments below, pandas. Do you think this woman was being fair with her friend? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in reading another Bored Panda article, we recommend checking out this one featuring even more travel drama!
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
Readers assured the woman that she had done nothing wrong, noting that the issue was not her friend’s disability
What do you think ?
Rens 1 year ago
I'm disabled, I have Fibromyalgia but that doesn't give me the right to behave like an entitled asshat. I am very aware of my needs and limitations, and I plan accordingly. I know a city trip with lots of walking is just not possible for me. I would have arranged for some sort of mobility scooter. I'm also very tall, and a plus size due to mobility issues, so a wheelchair is out of the question: I'm too heavy to push or self-propel because my shoulders and hands are bad. I can't blame OP for not wanting to go on another trip with this friend either.
arthbach 1 year ago
There are a number of conditions whereby a person might be fine one day, and the next they are in a huge amount of pain, or have incredibly low energy. It can be very helpful to have light weight mobility aids, a range of painkillers, and a very flexible schedule. It's a good idea to have a list of activities for good days and another one for bad. Plan on walking/public transport there, and a taxi back. Plan frequent rests. If there's a chance you will need assistance at the airport or railway station, book them. You can always let them know you are having a good day, and don't need the assistance.
Roan The Demon Kitty 1 year ago
exactly, she should have planned better instead of acting the way she did. And I say this as someone who also has Fibromyalgia (as well as Porpyhria which can cause fatigue and pain etc during flareups)
Load More Replies...
SadieCat17 1 year ago
I don't have fibromyalgia but I do have scoliosis and while it isn't fair that I got dealt a bad hand, it's still my responsibility to plan around it, not the responsibility of others. If I can't function a certain day, I don't make it the problem of my friends, I just stay back and rest while they enjoy their plans. On the days where I'm ok, I join them. It's pretty simple. Don't drag the people around you down just because of your condition. It sucks, but the dildo of life often comes unlubed, which I and everyone else with chronic pain understands.
Rens 1 year ago
I'm disabled, I have Fibromyalgia but that doesn't give me the right to behave like an entitled asshat. I am very aware of my needs and limitations, and I plan accordingly. I know a city trip with lots of walking is just not possible for me. I would have arranged for some sort of mobility scooter. I'm also very tall, and a plus size due to mobility issues, so a wheelchair is out of the question: I'm too heavy to push or self-propel because my shoulders and hands are bad. I can't blame OP for not wanting to go on another trip with this friend either.
arthbach 1 year ago
There are a number of conditions whereby a person might be fine one day, and the next they are in a huge amount of pain, or have incredibly low energy. It can be very helpful to have light weight mobility aids, a range of painkillers, and a very flexible schedule. It's a good idea to have a list of activities for good days and another one for bad. Plan on walking/public transport there, and a taxi back. Plan frequent rests. If there's a chance you will need assistance at the airport or railway station, book them. You can always let them know you are having a good day, and don't need the assistance.
Roan The Demon Kitty 1 year ago
exactly, she should have planned better instead of acting the way she did. And I say this as someone who also has Fibromyalgia (as well as Porpyhria which can cause fatigue and pain etc during flareups)
Load More Replies... SadieCat17 1 year ago
I don't have fibromyalgia but I do have scoliosis and while it isn't fair that I got dealt a bad hand, it's still my responsibility to plan around it, not the responsibility of others. If I can't function a certain day, I don't make it the problem of my friends, I just stay back and rest while they enjoy their plans. On the days where I'm ok, I join them. It's pretty simple. Don't drag the people around you down just because of your condition. It sucks, but the dildo of life often comes unlubed, which I and everyone else with chronic pain understands.
You May Like Woman Refuses To Share Ownership Of Her House With Fiancé, He Secretly Calls A Real Estate Lawyer Dad And Daughter Refuse To Attend Family Trip Over One Person: "Really Need A Wake-Up Call" Cheating Husband Loses Wife, Demands Her BFF Be A Regular Nanny: "I've Abandoned The Children"
Ieva Pečiulytė
Jonas Zvilius
Mindaugas Balčiauskas
Related on Bored Panda
47
40