Honestly the parents trying to do this is really inappropriate. Having shared a room with my step brother when I was little, it was awkward, but at least we had grown up together more or less. Making a teenaged girl share her room with a younger teenaged boy she doesn't even know is absolutely crazy. It sounds like the boy has gone through something traumatic and I feel for him, but if they want the daughter to be more understanding, she is old enough to be told what happened. If I was her, I'd just take my s**t and redecorate the room in the basement.

At least in America, if you assume legal guardianship of a minor it’s illegal to room them with a child of the opposite gender. I’m not 100% on this but I think it’s true for the foster care system. She could move to the basement, sure, but her parents need to clue her in a bit more to what’s happening and how she can be supportive for him. She’s 17, she can handle a general explanation of the situation.

NTA and your mother needs a reality check.

She should mention this to several of her teachers, teachers are "Mandatory reporters" in the U.S. a visit from a CPS worker might change their minds.

nta. op needs privacy and its gonna be awkward just sharing a room with another person.

These parents are trying to parentify their teenage daughter and it is NOT OK.

You told your mom you don't care about moving into the basement room.. so why not just move down there and avoid all this mess? Sure it sucks to be the one who has to move, but it sure beats a 14yo strange boy, going through puberty, sharing a room with you when you try to change clothes or sleep...

Wholly inappropriate for a 17 year old girl to be expected to share a bedroom with a 14 year old boy. In my country it's not illegal as far as I'm aware. However, when their is a option of separate rooms it is common sense. Both teenagers need their own space and as the 17 year old is almost an adult. I would take the opportunity to take the basement and have it transformed into a self contained apartment for her to enable her burdening freedom

My partner has a 19 year old daughter, I have a 13 year old daughter. We never ask them to share personal spaces with each other and they are (obviously) the same sex. Young people deserve the same level of privacy that we do.

We are missing too many crucial details here! Is the brother moving in permanently? Does he only need a room with a window or a second person for a definite time? Is there maybe even a reason behind the fact that the daughter should share BECAUSE she isn't an adult yet (trauma?)? Talk with each other people! Talking is the only thing that helps! I fully understand the daughter going on the barricades if she too has only this little information!

Is this story from Reddit or Pornhub?

Totally inappropriate! I can't believe they expected her to be OK with that. He's not only a 14 year old boy, he's her uncle FFS! Pretty sure that's also against the law in some places.

Omg, that last comment “wala” that should be on the other post about incorrectly pronounced words! It’s French and it’s “voila”! Also, opposite sex teenagers need their own space, this is just wrong. He’s 14, not a baby, he can have the basement room.

CPS will be all over this...very soon.

You're doing the right thing. This was always your room and you cannot be forced to shary it with a 14 year old of the opposite sex. Even my brother was never allowed to sleep in the same room as his sisters, just because of the dressing and such. He had to sleep in the dining room when there wasn't a separate room for him. and there is a basement where he can stay. So there is no necessity whatsoever for him to be in your room. Hold on!

you cannot, put two teenage sibblings in a room even thought they are of the same gender.

This is odd. Either something is up with the boy (he seems quite sensitive, to be afraid of the dark at his age) or they want him as a way to keep her boyfriend out of her room or both. The boy being displaced also means he has the significantly higher need at the moment, and it doesn't seem like the OPs parents have the bandwidth for her teenage shenanigans in protest right now. So she is burning through significant amounts of goodwill with her actions, and may come home to find her door gone, her stuff tossed, or something equally unpleasant. She is likely doing permanent damage to her parent/ child relationship and to their opinion of her. She needs to move to the basement ASAP, because making a difficult situation worse won't endear her to anyone.

So NTA...and so many reasons why! Even on a temporary basis (more than 1 night), it's just wrong. As she said, she's never even met him, and we all know that teenage boys are just walking hormones (and that's not a dig at guys, just a basic fact). I could write a novel on why this is wrong on so many levels, but I'm sure other commenters have made the same arguements... If push came to shove, though, and it was me, I'd move my room to the basement, lock, stock, & barrell. Who knows, she might even prefer the extra privacy; bonus points if the room is bigger than the room she's in now. Change is inevitable, and maybe her 14 yr old uncle has really been through something traumatic. If that's the case, maybe he should be in her room, closer to her parents, in case something happens (nightmares, etc)--but she shouldn't be there as well. I just hope that whatever happened hasn't put him in a fragile state of mind where no one knows what he's capable of...

There are no state or federal laws against most opposite gender siblings sharing a room in their own home, but some institutions do regulate how spaces are shared. i know they arent siblings but same considerations might apply depending on their state. if OP is very concerned they might consider reaching out to a guidance councilor at their school. they are mandatory reporters and asking a teen girl to share a room with anyone regardless of age, gender, or familial relations when they are uncomfortable might fall into that category of concern

Everyone saying why cant a 17 year old girl share with a 14 year old boy they never met is a bleddy idiot. First of that kid will masturbate everywhere, secondly make the 14 year learn to sleep without a light. Clearly a dumb idea and when you have a spare room even dumber

How she's not the AH when she just can move in the basement if she want a room alone... She just didn't want too out of pettiness. And she's 17, grow up, you won't stay in your child room forever, you need to grow up and move forward. Have some empathy for a family member in need, a minimum.