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Achieving success as a medical professional requires more than being a hardworking, compassionate, and knowledgeable individual eager to help those in need. It also helps to have a high tolerance for anything that can make the average person feel nauseous.
Check out these stories to see what I mean. These are anecdotes from doctors, dental hygienists, and EMTs who have discovered some of the most bizarre items lodged inside a human body. We’re talking about parasites, plastic toys, eating utensils, and entire wine bottles.
If that has drawn up enough curiosity, go ahead and scroll through. Hopefully, you’re not having a meal while doing so.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
"I don't know what to tell you, there, Bobbo. Either this kid has a light bulb up his butt or his colon has a great idea.".
RELATED:
#2
Not a doctor, but a former Navy Corpsman. I had a patient come in a few weeks after shooting himself in the femur with a nail from a nail gun. He was on the roof and started to lose his balance, and apparently instinctively placed the nail gun on his leg to keep himself upright. He fell off the roof, pulled out the nail with a pair of vice grips, but couldn’t get all of it. He thought it wasn’t a big deal until one day he was casually walking and his femur snapped in two.
#3
A few years ago, when I first started working in the ER, a patient came in with severe rectal pain and bleeding. Upon inspection he had large and visible hemorrhoids, so the reasonable assumption was that he had an internal one that burst and was the source of the pain and discomfort right? Well turns out the patient had been experimenting with a gaping device and was placing wine glasses inside his a**l cavity... the device was cheap and plastic, which when he was startled by his mother walking into the room caused him to flinch and flex his sphincter closed and broke the device and the wine glass inside. They managed to get the device out of him but had to come into the er to have the shards removed.
#4
Anesthesiologist here. Few years ago, we admitted a young guy (think he was 15) for a surgery consisting in retrieving a huge black d***o in his descending colon. The thing is (are):
- battery was still on and the mamba was vibrating when I had to start my induction and told the guy "think about something pleasant".
- to get something up there (at least 25 cm from the a**s), he admitted afterall he used another d***o to push it that far.
Fortunately, the surgeon managed to get the beast out of him without cutting through his abdomen; he inserted his whole arm and managed to grip it from its base (the area is naturally well lubricated).
I won't say here what the surgeon said afterall. He was kinda mad to be out of his bed at 2 am to fill his arm up some teenager's b******e.
#5
As an intern I saw a patient with a horrible open abdominal wound that wouldn’t heal, and horrible hygiene with no self-care. He came into the ED due to abdominal pain and we found about 12 maggots buried into and crawling in his large open wound.
Panda-sized Potato 1 month ago
While that is disgusting, maggots have been used in medical since Napoleonic times. They eat necrotic flesh, leaving healthy tissue alone. Of course, that depends on the species, as some maggots do eat healthy tissue.
#6
X-ray tech here. We had one where a patient stuffed a bottle of maple syrup up his butt, and you could tell the brand was Aunt Jemima from the X-ray.
#7
Had a 12 year old patient come in the ICU with a bullet wound on the frontal part of the head. Pink Brain material was oozing out of the bullet hole and out of the nose.
For reference I was doing medical practice in a relatively small hospital in Guatemala. A pretty dangerous city because of d**g trafficking and all.
From the little story bits we could gather, the kid was just playing alongside a nearby river when he suddenly collapsed on the rocks nearby. His grandfather was nearby and was the one who brought him into the hospital. The story suggests that a stray bullet was the one that hit him. The grandfather's story suggests that he heard shooting on the other side of the river, but didn't pay much attention to it because it's common for people to carry guns around and sometimes just randomly shoot in the air. Unfortunately enough for the child, the bullet hit him straight in the head.
We had imaging done on the child and once we got to the head, we saw that his brain was practically turned into mush with the bullet still inside.
We tried everything we could, but he ended up passing away a few hours after.
#8
Late to the thread so this will probably get buried:
Disclaimer, I am a doctor but this happened years ago in medical school with one of the cadavers we study anatomy on, not a live patient but I still thought it was pretty crazy and definitely memorable!
In the preclinical years of medical school, most medical schools have students enroll in anatomy lab where we dissect cadavers as part of the course. One of the anatomy labs had a cadaver who had passed away from complications from kidney failure (according to the identification tab).
While that anatomy team was dissecting some of the leg and buttock muscles, they found a small caliber bullet in the gluteus medius. No idea how it got there and totally unrelated to the cause of death.
I like to imagine the guy signing paperwork to donate his body to science, thinking that the med students dissecting his butt would get a funny surprise lol.
#9
My mom was an ER nurse and someone had shoved an entire wine bottle up their a*s. The bottle created a giant suction, and it had started to pull their intestines out when they attempted to remove it. They had to drill a hole in the base of the bottle to k**l the suction, and then remove the bottle from their a*****e.
It was a pinot noir at least.
#10
When I was cycling I had a freak event where a bee flew into my mouth and stung my uvula. Rode 8 miles back home with what felt like an awful sore throat. Checked in the mirror and stinger was still lodged in. Went to urgent care after where a doctor had to numb and remove it with tweezers. After successfully removing it he said he has never heard of it happening before and we had a laugh about it. Overall 4/10, unenjoyable forsure but not the worst thing I’ve ever experienced. Was riding with 2 people who were very allergic to bees so would’ve been likely deadly for them. If you want proof check my post history lol.
#11
I have a frequent flyer who enjoys systematically inserting needles and straightened-out paper clips up his urethra and then coming to the hospital to get them removed.
Earonn - 1 month ago
I don't mind the kink, but hospitals are not anyone's personal pleasure palaces. Accidents can happen, fine. But this sounds like that guy thinks a hospital has nothing better to do than giving him his kick. At what point is that sexual abuse of the hospital staff (as in making them participants in his s*x game without their consent)?
#12
My brother had a guy come into his ER several years ago, and found an infection in his urethra. Upon further examination, this guy intentionally stuck a catheter in to bypass the urinary tract, and the other end was hooked up to a bag of wine.
Yes, he made it so he pees out wine as a party trick and people drink it. WTAF.
#13
Well, when i was posted in the forensics department during my medical school, I once got the opportunity to see a slug lodged in the trachea of a dead man. Yep, that’s how he had died. He choked on a slug while trying to eat it whole (and raw). Oh and he also had two chilies in his pocket which the residents assumed he was gonna eat while eating the slug to make it more spicy.
#14
Woman came into the ER complaining of severe abdominal pain. On ultrasound they found 2 rolls of camera film in her v****a. She looked shocked and said that she put them up there 4 months prior and "must have forgot to take them back out.".
Lavender Myst 1 month ago
There's a real story here... i wanna know whats on the film, where they were smuggled out of, and will it be a movie later?
#15
EMT here I've had a homeless guy who complained about numbness and Inability to move his legs, upon further inspection there was more parasite and bacterial infection than leg, literally had to use a trash bag to prevent the maggots from getting everywhere. Xylazine is a hell of a d**g.
#16
As a dentist, we are used to seeing unerupted teeth still stuck in the bone which we call impacted teeth. The 3rd molars are notorious for this. And after them, the canine teeth also get impacted. We confirm this when we see the radiographs of the patient. I was seeing this radiograph of a colleagues patient who had a missing canine which we were expecting on find impacted. We were not able to find it and thought it was missing. On closer inspection, we saw it impacted just below the eye lying horizontally.
Posted this before as well...
#17
Not a dr but I worked at a hospital as a phlebotomist. One night a man came in with a toy plastic broccoli up his butt, like from a kids play kitchen. He was the talk of the hospital for a couple days.
#18
Just a medical student but during one of my rotations in the ICU we had this patient who had not one but two strokes within a 24 hour time period. When he first came to the ED it was clear he having a stroke but his symptoms were relatively mild (some numbness in his fingers, mild difficulty speaking). He didn't think anything was wrong so he left against medical advice before we could do any serious work up. He came back later in the day with much more severe symptoms and so he immediately got spirited up to the ICU which is where I saw him.
On his MRI it showed signs of "watershed strokes" which are a special kind of brain injury which indicate the brain as a whole is not getting enough blood. We typically see this type of stroke in severe trauma patients who have lost large amounts of blood, but this guy didn't any have signs of blood loss at all!
We did some more advanced imaging and what we saw was that he was missing BOTH his carotid arteries, and one of his basilar arteries (normal people have two of these that run up from the spinal cord into the brain). So basically he only had one tiny blood vessel perfusing his entire brain. The end result of this was that whenever his blood pressure dropped the slightest amount his brain would get starved for oxygen and he would have a stroke.
The real kicker? Even after being admitted to the ICU and being on multiple pressors to keep this blood pressure up to prevent him from stroking out, he still wanted to leave against medical advice.
Lavender Myst 1 month ago
'Wanting to leave against medical advice' you know that saying where people make stupid desistions and you question whther or not the few brain cells they have left is getting enough oxygen to think? This is the guy you already know isn't.
#19
A curtain rod. A couple got frisky on Valentine’s Day. Ended the night in the ER with a curtain rod in his butt. It was… something.
#20
I'm not a doctor, but my father is an ER physician. He told me a story one time about how a young adult man came in with his mother complaining of severe stomach pain. The young man claimed to not know why, so my dad ordered X-Rays. Turns out there was a mannequin hand lodged in this man's prostate (maybe? I'm not a physician and he told me this story years ago, so I can't exactly remember). Young fella was fisting himself with a mannequin hand and lost it up his b*m.
#21
Ophthalmologist here. I saw a schizophrenic patient who was smearing feces into his eye. He had a really bad corneal ulcer.
#22
Not a doctor but I have to look at X-rays in my role in patient treatment. Dude had a bit of a run-in with a tree stump grinder. There was a straight-up small branch embedded in his calf (that said, most of the calf was hanging off his lower limb) and he had to go in for surgical debridements of the leg almost daily because trees are not very sterile and have a lot of splinters.
#23
While working in the ER, I had a patient come in with a screwdriver for eyeglasses stuck in his urethra. He claims to have picked up a girl at a bar, brought her back to his place, and he must have blacked out from the alcohol during the “activities.” Apparently she didn’t like that, so she grabbed the screwdriver off his nightstand, shoved it in there, and left. He woke up the next morning and it had gotten sucked all the way in to his perineum. You couldn’t even see it anymore, but you could feel its outline during the physical exam.
#24
A live cockroach in an ear 🪳👂.
#25
My uncle is a doctor, he told me about the time he found a fork and knife inside a patient. How it got there or through which orifice it came in through I was never told nor do I want to think about it BUT. I know that he doesn’t like to tell the story.
#26
Ohh, my dental hygienist told me a couple one made her laugh while telling. So we’re limited to the mouth. One was a small grown up vegetable of sort, so probably a seed ended around the teeth and grown. The other made her curious about an abscess she was working over, since the patient was described as clean and no other big problems, so cleaning and cleaning, the cause came out. A hair. By the shape, and the reaction from the patient, which attributed it to the natural toothbrush, it was evidently a pubic hair.
#27
Cutaneous diphtheria eating away at the pts leg 😭.
Lavender Myst 1 month ago
So, infected sores likely due to infection from contact with others with it or poor hygiene. All in all, not to worst, nor weirdest on this list.
#28
Couch cushion, a single connect four piece, and half a roll of pennies (different patients).
#29
"I fell and...".
#30
It wasn’t a doctor, but I got my flared b******g stuck in my a*****e and was so embarrassed I called my best friend over to help me get it out.
She’s big into a**l stuff with her hubby so I knew if anyone was able to help me it would be her.
My husband got home a few hours later and I said “while you were at work bestie had to come pull my b******g out of my a*****e.”
He was very grateful because at the time his BIL was the ER doctor here lol.
Poll Question
What quality do you think is most crucial for a medical professional encountering bizarre situations?
High tolerance for unusual cases
Compassion
Knowledge
Sense of humor
What do you think ?
Broccoli 1 month ago
Wow…way too many of these involve men shoving interesting objects into their a**s or p***s…like…why…
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago
Eh, I don’t kink-shame. My ex was into bútt stuff and wanted me to do a lot of anál play/anál séx. It wasn’t my thing (hurts WAY too much), but I’m not going to judge others who do enjoy putting things up their heiny. Just.. maybe they should use things that aren’t fragile/easily breakable (thinking about the wineglass story..)
Load More Replies... Panda-sized Potato 1 month ago
My mom was an OR nurse for the VA. I remember her telling me about a case they had of a homeless vet with a soup ladle completely in his throat.
Broccoli 1 month ago
Wow…way too many of these involve men shoving interesting objects into their a**s or p***s…like…why…
LakotaWolf (she/her) 1 month ago
Eh, I don’t kink-shame. My ex was into bútt stuff and wanted me to do a lot of anál play/anál séx. It wasn’t my thing (hurts WAY too much), but I’m not going to judge others who do enjoy putting things up their heiny. Just.. maybe they should use things that aren’t fragile/easily breakable (thinking about the wineglass story..)
Load More Replies... Panda-sized Potato 1 month ago
My mom was an OR nurse for the VA. I remember her telling me about a case they had of a homeless vet with a soup ladle completely in his throat.
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