Many of us believe in the power of manifestation. At times, our desires are so strong that we have faith they will come true solely through the strength of our wishes. Psychologist Jean Piaget says that this is especially common in children younger than 7: "Young children have difficulty distinguishing between the subjective worlds in their heads and the objective world. According to Piaget, children therefore sometimes believe that their thoughts can directly cause things to happen."

There is this term called 'The Law of Attraction'. It suggests that positive thoughts bring positive results, while negative thoughts bring negative outcomes. The ways that you can incorporate the law of attraction in your life are to be grateful, visualize your goals, look for the positives in the situation, and learn how to identify negative thinking. Also, when something negative happens, reframe it more positively. While it won't always be a solution to your problems, the law of attraction might just help you cultivate a more optimistic outlook on life.

However, according to clinical psychologist Dr. Ellis, expectations are the silent killer of happiness. If we believe in notions like life should be fair, everyone should like me or I can change them, we might very well get disappointed. The truth is that life is not impartial and bad things happen to good people. Just as you don't like everyone you know, not all people will like you. The only person you can change is yourself. 

What we could do instead of raising high expectations is cultivate gratitude. "If you think that human nature is good and powerful, then you will go around frustrated because the perfect society has not yet been achieved. But if you go through life believing that our reason is not that great, our skills are not that impressive, and our goodness is mottled, then you might be amazed how life has managed to be as sweet as it is." It is important to accept what is rather than what should be.

It is only through A that we can transition into B, and it is through consistent daily practice that we begin to grasp the concept of freedom. It comes with releasing unrealistic expectations and embracing gratitude for the present moment. This enables us to reclaim our happiness and get rid of negative thoughts.

There is another side of the coin. Psychologists say having low expectations also won't make us happy. It is also important to have high expectations because they allow us to dream and reach for our goals: "Through a process called mental contrasting, we create judgments about our expectations of the future and decide which dreams are realistic to pursue and which ones we should let go." For example, you're miserable at your work and you're imagining finding your dream job. This imagining is mentally contrasting and it helps you to identify your dreams. So aim high, but be realistic, it can be very motivating!

So in the end, it shouldn't be expectations vs reality, it is more like 'realistic expectations'. Keep scrolling to see some of the finest posts and don't forget to check out our previous post about it here.