Dial 1 for Yaveh, 2 for Allah, 3 for Buddha, 4 for Lucifer, 5 to repeat this menú and 0 to talk to our operator.

He looks so happy 😊

Ahh, Yoga ain’t taking no one’s s**t

And you’d better have a real conversation.

🇨🇦

Is this what they mean by “hard labour”?? 😂

Me too

Hang them outside your house if you want to annnoy the heck out of your neighbours!

I am Batman!

No it’s uncle Bronco!

Ba-dum-tss

Start me up, Olive. If you're got the money honey I've got the thyme

It’s getting hot in here (so hot) so take off all your cloves 🎶

First, I was sad they used the wrong "it's" then I was so happy they used the right "its".

New restaurant name: Déjà Garlic

dad joke

Strip tease!

WHERE IS THAT PLACE

Free the scape?

Can I have this on a shirt please? Double sided, thank you!

dam these owners are really done aren't they

Out, damn spot!

I need this sign! BADLY! We have a public walking trail just before our private driveway starts. Guaranteed from the 200+ daily walkers we'll get 2 who can't follow directions OR read the 7 no trespassing signs between the trail and our house. Last week a couple walked by and after giving them the "you're lost, didn't you see the no trespassing signs?" speech, the guy ACTUALLY said to me "How do I know this really is your land? YOU COULD HAVE JUST BOUGHT THESE SIGNS AT A STORE and put them up!". Wait! What?

I wonder how many moosejaws dropped after reading this

lol

The Ministry of Silly Walks, Monty Python. LOL

No his name is radar

Who is we?

It is merely a 'do you feel lucky today?' - sign. If a cow falls on you, what would you do?

If Voice box is f****d from yelling "ding dong" ...just slam head against the door

How nice of them to provide a location for cannibals to enjoy their meal

A very valid reason ✅

Accurate

Better continue the 'treetment' than

Memory can be misleading.

One of my favorites is: "WARNING: Children left unattended will be given a free puppy and a shot of espresso."

I should go to this church and have em pay my electric bill

More importantly, HOW do you know it’s hot?

You don't get that kind of service anymore. **sigh**

You don’t have to tell me twice!

Yes! I intensely love absurdist comedy. ;-P

They paved paradise and put up a parking lot.

That you... even had to... my mind can't even... wrap itself... Ohhhhh, U of Alabama. Never mind.

This is inherently wrong.

Burgers + Asparagus = Aspergers

Rabbit of Caerbannog !

WYSIWYG

What is it SUPPOSED to be

They’re crying because of the fact they have to return to work 😆😂

I waited all day, only to find out the SOB was riding a mare that day.

well exuse me i have to flee the country now

pics or it didn’t not happen

Monty Python---The Ministry of Silly Walks. One of my favorite sketches. Cleese won't do it anymore, because his hip can't take it. LOL

...registered assistance wasps?

Tongs?