Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app
Continue in app Continue in browser

BoredPanda Add post form topAdd Post
Tooltip close

The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Fight boredom with iPhones and iPads here.

“AITAH For Telling My Wife She Is Not Worthy Of What She’s Asking For For Her ‘Push Present’?”

“AITAH For Telling My Wife She Is Not Worthy Of What She’s Asking For For Her ‘Push Present’?”

ADVERTISEMENT

Bringing a new life into this world is no small feat, and every person who does it deserves appreciation for their efforts.

One woman who is about to give birth to her first child demanded a “push present” from her husband—a car that would be exclusively hers. However, the man, Reddit user Throwra-pushpresent, thought it was too much and said her expectations were unrealistic.

His reply led to a heated argument between the two of them over entitlement, gratitude, and the true meaning of what it means to be a parent.

Unable to resolve it, the future dad made a post on r/AITAH, asking its members to share their opinions on the matter.

This man was flabbergasted by his wife’s extravagant “push present” request, so he turned to the internet for advice

Image credits: Omar Lopez / unsplash (not the actual photo)

“AITAH for telling my wife she is not worthy of what she’s asking for her ‘push present?'”

“My wife and I have been together for 5 years. She’s pregnant with our first right now.

Few days ago, she sends me a TikTok video of a woman over one of those extremist podcasts talking about deserving some kind of a “push present”. At first I didn’t even know what that meant. But when I looked it up, it’s basically a thank you gift to the woman who brought your child in the world.

ADVERTISEMENT

This concept is and still seems very strange to me. I understand seeking appreciation from your husband for what women go through during pregnancy and childbirth, but it’s the materialistic part that gave me the ick.

The woman on TikTok went on and on about how it’s a “body for a body” which meant the man would have to get a permanent tattoo on his lower body, give her a house and a car as a gift exclusively to her.

Image credits: Solen Feyissa / unsplash (not the actual photo)

I felt that those expectations are very entitled, honestly a little vindictive, envious (permanent tattoo part) and very over the top for my taste. The decision to bring a child in the world is both partner’s decision. My wife in our case is not forced to be a mom or be pregnant, as she wants to be a parent too.

I simply replied to the TikTok with laughing emojis and moved on, thinking it was the end of it and probably thought she meant to send that TikTok as a satire, like: “oh look how dumb this woman is, thinking she deserves all that”

ADVERTISEMENT

She was in the other room when I reacted to the video, so she comes to me and tells me that she doesn’t expect a tattoo and a house exclusively for her, but she wants me to dip into my personal savings to get her a car exclusively for her.

I looked at her, almost shocked and began laughing. I thought my wife and I had similar views on how extremist people can be, and I was wrong.

I thought she was joking, and I pressed her if she was actually serious, she got very annoyed that I thought she was joking and probably imitating the entitled woman on the reel and she flatly said that she expects a real push present.

Image credits: Ron Lach / pexels (not the actual photo)

I said that her gift is the gift of parenthood and the realized outcome of a healthy baby. And materially speaking, I’ll probably gift her a Mother’s Day card, a day out or some jewelry she wants (total under 700 dollars), but nothing more.

ADVERTISEMENT

I said if she really wants an extra car, it’ll be “OUR” car, not just hers. She pressed more and said how it isn’t enough for what she will go through.

She kept pushing and pushing and asked me if I think she’s not worthy enough. I told her she is worthy as my partner and the mother of my child, but she has to be realistic and realize that none of us, individually speaking, is worthy of what she’s asking for. That she has to manage her expectations because I don’t see why she feels she deserves that.

It came out wrong but I didn’t mean to dismiss her as a person. She isn’t speaking to me and is crying arguing about it. I heard her criticizing me to her sister on the phone but under no circumstances would I ever considering gifting HER a car.

I feel bad she is hurting right now but I don’t feel bad for giving her a reality check.” 

Credits: throwra-pushpresent

Most people believe there’s nothing wrong with the man’s reply

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

But some believe he should’ve handled the situation differently

ADVERTISEMENT
Share on Facebook
Rokas Laurinavičius

Rokas Laurinavičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Read more »

Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

Read less »
Rokas Laurinavičius

Rokas Laurinavičius

Writer, BoredPanda staff

Rokas is a writer at Bored Panda with a BA in Communication. After working for a sculptor, he fell in love with visual storytelling and enjoys covering everything from TV shows (any Sopranos fans out there?) to photography. Throughout his years in Bored Panda, over 300 million people have read the posts he's written, which is probably more than he could count to.

Mantas Kačerauskas

Mantas Kačerauskas

Author, BoredPanda staff

Read more »

As a Visual Editor at Bored Panda, I indulge in the joy of curating delightful content, from adorable pet photos to hilarious memes, all while nurturing my wanderlust and continuously seeking new adventures and interests—sometimes thrilling, sometimes daunting, but always exciting!

Read less »

Mantas Kačerauskas

Mantas Kačerauskas

Author, BoredPanda staff

As a Visual Editor at Bored Panda, I indulge in the joy of curating delightful content, from adorable pet photos to hilarious memes, all while nurturing my wanderlust and continuously seeking new adventures and interests—sometimes thrilling, sometimes daunting, but always exciting!

What do you think ?
Add photo comments
POST
jlkooiker avatar
lenka
Community Member
1 hour ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My "push" present was a baby. Best present ever. My husband did also come through. He bought me champagne, soft cheese and sushi.

apatheistaccount2 avatar
Apatheist Account2
Community Member
2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They're a married couple. Everything belongs to them jointly, and they'll have a lot of extra expense with a baby. Buying a car as a reward is just weird, especially if they can't afford it. Do not be influenced by "influencers".

glennschroeder avatar
Papa
Community Member
51 minutes ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't help but wonder if maybe they just have one car, and when he takes it she doesn't have any transportation? And him saying "If we get another car it will be OUR car, not YOUR car" rubbed me the wrong way. If she wants to say it's her car, so what? How does that hurt him? I absolutely agree that the woman on TikTok is insane, but this guy sounds like a jerk.

Load More Replies...
deborahbrett avatar
Deborah B
Community Member
2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Expensive "push" presents are for the superrich, but "not worthy" makes this guy look bad. Go with "You and this baby are worth everything, but we can't afford X". And talk about the car. If you have only one car, a second car may be a realistic "need" if one partner is using that car to commute to work, and the other is trying to grocery shop with a stroller, newborn, diaper bag, etc.

m-kommel avatar
aj
Community Member
2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree. The expensive presents are absolutely over the top but telling someone that they're "not worthy", especially someone you love, someone who is carrying a tiny human you helped made, is a horrible thing to say.

Load More Replies...
Load More Comments
jlkooiker avatar
lenka
Community Member
1 hour ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My "push" present was a baby. Best present ever. My husband did also come through. He bought me champagne, soft cheese and sushi.

apatheistaccount2 avatar
Apatheist Account2
Community Member
2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They're a married couple. Everything belongs to them jointly, and they'll have a lot of extra expense with a baby. Buying a car as a reward is just weird, especially if they can't afford it. Do not be influenced by "influencers".

glennschroeder avatar
Papa
Community Member
51 minutes ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can't help but wonder if maybe they just have one car, and when he takes it she doesn't have any transportation? And him saying "If we get another car it will be OUR car, not YOUR car" rubbed me the wrong way. If she wants to say it's her car, so what? How does that hurt him? I absolutely agree that the woman on TikTok is insane, but this guy sounds like a jerk.

Load More Replies...
deborahbrett avatar
Deborah B
Community Member
2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Expensive "push" presents are for the superrich, but "not worthy" makes this guy look bad. Go with "You and this baby are worth everything, but we can't afford X". And talk about the car. If you have only one car, a second car may be a realistic "need" if one partner is using that car to commute to work, and the other is trying to grocery shop with a stroller, newborn, diaper bag, etc.

m-kommel avatar
aj
Community Member
2 hours ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree. The expensive presents are absolutely over the top but telling someone that they're "not worthy", especially someone you love, someone who is carrying a tiny human you helped made, is a horrible thing to say.

Load More Replies...
Load More Comments
You May Like
Related on Bored Panda
Related on Bored Panda
Trending on Bored Panda
Also on Bored Panda