Depending on where you’re flying to, air travel can be extremely exciting or overwhelmingly stressful. And especially when traveling with little ones, it’s important to have all your ducks in a row to ensure the journey goes as smoothly as possible. 

One mom recently posted on Mumsnet seeking advice on whether or not it’s fair to expect other passengers to swap seats on a plane to accommodate her family, and the internet was quick to give her a reality check. Below, you’ll find the full story, as well as some of the replies readers left. 

This mom wasn’t able to book the seats that her family wanted for an upcoming flight

Image credits: Unai82 / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

But when she shared her plans to rely on other passengers accommodating them, the internet had plenty to say

Image credits: Deekaytwo

Image credits: westend61 / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Deekaytwo

It’s wise to book early if you want to have specific seats on a flight

Image credits: Rawpixel / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

To find out more about this specific situation, we reached out to the mom who shared this story online, Mumsnet user Deekaytwo. She was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and share that if anyone had asked her the question she intended to ask on the flight, she would have definitely moved to accommodate them. “I wouldn’t ask someone to do something I wouldn’t do, of course,” she noted.

The mom also says that her family has already traveled, and the journey went very smoothly. “There’s an update in the thread. It went fine – one of the seats we wanted was already empty, so we didn’t have to ask anyone to move and actually got an extra seat free too (which we didn’t need or use).”

When going on vacation, a flight might seem like a necessary part of the journey to get your adventure started. But it can also be one of the most dreaded aspects of the whole trip. Getting the entire family to the airport on time with everything they need and without anyone having a meltdown can feel like a miracle. But it often seems like no matter how hard you try to handle all of the details of the journey, something will go wrong.

Many passengers don’t mind swapping seats, but it depends on the situation

Image credits: astakhovyaroslav / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

To minimize unexpected issues, Travel + Leisure recommends that travelers buy tickets three to seven months in advance for domestic travel and four to ten months ahead of time when traveling internationally. And if it’s important to have a specific seat, you might have to pay a little extra when booking.

According to MoneySavingExpert, a family of four can easily spend over $300 making sure that they’re all seated together when flying. Many airlines do try to keep parties together, especially if they book flights early and check in as soon as possible before the journey, but it’s a risk. An entire family may not be seated together, but airlines like British Airways, American Airlines, KLM, Air France and more have specific guarantees that children will be seated next to at least one of the adults in their party on flights.

While it’s understandable to not want to pay extra when booking flights, it’s important to remember that if you didn’t pay for a specific seat, you have no right to complain. It doesn’t hurt to ask another passenger if they’d be willing to swap seats, but they have every right to say no if they’re not interested in moving. A Kayak survey about airplane etiquette found that 54% of travelers have no problem with someone asking them to switch seats if they ask politely.

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However, it depends on why you want to sit somewhere else too. 64% of travelers don’t think it’s appropriate to change seats just because you’re a nervous traveler, and 77% will refuse to move if someone wants to swap seats just because they don’t like theirs. And according to Carla Bevins, who teaches business management communication at Carnegie Mellon University, there are certain situations where swapping seats is inappropriate.

No one should feel entitled to a seat that they didn’t pay for

Image credits: Unai82 / envatoelements (not the actual photo)

Bevins told USA Today that if you’re seated in an exit row, sitting in a different class than the person you’re asking to move or if the fasten seat belts sign is illuminated, don’t even try. Moving around on the plane can also make flight attendants’ jobs more complicated. For example, if someone has an allergy, a specific meal request or mobility issues that require assistance when deplaning, it can be confusing when passengers have moved around.

There’s nothing wrong with swapping seats with someone who doesn’t mind moving, and everything ended up working out for this family. But it can sometimes become an issue when passengers feel entitled to seats that others have booked. Unfortunately, it’s not unheard of for parents to be entitled in public spaces, whether they think they should be able to clear an entire park or cut in line at the store because their kids are becoming tired. But the internet is always quick to call out this kind of behavior.

While it was not the case in this situation, some people out there do believe that they’re entitled to special treatment everywhere they go, which can negatively impact their children. Huffpost warns that being raised by an entitled parent can create a host of issues for kids. They might become entitled themselves, and they might have trouble dealing with adversity. Even as adults, they may grow up to have an inferiority complex, struggle with employment and/or struggle in relationships. 

We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. Do you think it was reasonable for this family to hope fellow passengers might move for them? Feel free to share, and then if you’re interested in checking out another Bored Panda article featuring seat swapping drama, look no further than right here!

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Some readers told the mom that expecting other passengers to move would be unreasonable

However, some said that it’s okay to ask, as long as she’s prepared to hear no

A small minority thought that swapping seats shouldn’t be a problem at all

And others shared some of their own experiences with unreasonable parents that they were reminded of

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