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Being pregnant is not an easy task. Not only are you growing a human being inside of you, but it also comes with various side effects. Some of them are more controllable, while others are not so much.
For example, incontinence, which embarrassed the author of today’s post so much that she came online to complain. Granted, she didn’t complain about the side effect itself, but rather how unkind she found a shop’s worker who didn’t let her use the staff bathroom and basically forced her to have an accident in the shop.
More info: Mumsnet
RELATED:
If growing a person inside of you wasn’t hard enough, pregnancy comes with many other side effects that make this journey even harder
Image credits: Garon Piceli / Pexels (not the actual photo)
A heavily pregnant woman feels the urge to pee, so she pops into a nearby store and asks to use the staff’s bathroom, but they don’t let her
Image credits: Sludge G / Flickr (not the actual photo)
Image credits: pelvicfloorisnomore
She wets herself even before leaving the shop, and later on she writes a post online about how people should be kinder when it comes to pregnant women and bathrooms
At the time when the OP wrote her post, she was imminently due with her baby, who is her third kid.
Typically, during any stage of a pregnancy, a woman feels a need to frequently urinate. In the beginning, it’s due to hormonal changes, while later it’s because a woman becomes larger to house a baby, which pushes against the bladder. In the last couple of weeks, emptying the bladder completely might be impossible.
That means incontinence, at least some, can be quite likely since the pelvic floor is weakened. Especially when coughing, sneezing, lifting things, and so on. Today’s OP can confirm that. In fact, pregnancy-related incontinence is why this post exists.
So, one day she took her kids to school, and on her way home she realized that she desperately needed to use a bathroom. Not only was she heavily pregnant, but also her pelvic floor was very weak from the last 2 pregnancies. Basically, it was an accident waiting to happen.
There were no public bathrooms anywhere close by, so she went into a shop on her way and asked to use the employee bathroom.
The lack of available public bathrooms affects not only pregnant women but other people too. In 2019 a study found that around 20% of people in the United Kingdom don’t go out as much as they would like because of limited bathroom access. Then, 50% of the public restricts their fluid intake so they don’t need to go to the toilet when out.
Image credits: Ivan Samkov / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Yet, in some cases, like, again, pregnancy, there’s no way to control incontinence. So, what else could the OP have done except ask to use the staff’s restroom? There was no way for her to make it home in time. Well, apparently the employee bathroom wasn’t a choice either, as the employee didn’t let her in.
The reasons why staff might refuse to let customers use their bathroom can be various. As this Quora answer suggests, it could be due to the fact that staff toilets aren’t public spaces, and letting anyone in might pose a security or health risk. Other answers, like this one, say it could be due to a place wanting to avoid problems with insurance companies.
The OP wasn’t let in because it was against the company’s policy. Sadly, due to this, this experience quickly became humiliating for the woman. She peed herself before even making it outside of the shop. Needless to say, the walk home was embarrassing for her. She said it could have been avoided if the staff had shown her a little kindness.
People online felt compassion for the woman. Quite a few of them also kind of understood why the staff member didn’t let her in. It might not have to do with kindness, but with the fact that disregarding company policy might contribute to them losing their job.
Well, as one of the comments pointed out, the question of more public bathrooms should be raised. With more of them, stories like this one wouldn’t be happening. Pregnant women wouldn’t be forced to wet themselves, shop staff wouldn’t be accused of being unkind, and many other people could go out more freely, knowing there’s a bathroom nearby. Everyone would win. But maybe that’s too utopian – who can tell?
Folks online felt empathetic for her, but also pointed out that staff not letting her into their bathroom might have nothing to do with kindness, but rather with them wanting to keep their jobs
Image credits: Jan Antonin Kolar / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
What do you think ?
arthbach 2 months ago
I own a shop. Our general rule is the loo is for members of staff. However, we will never deny access to someone who needs it. This might be for a child, an elderly person, someone with a disability, or those who are pregnant. There is a public loo about 5 minutes away, but there are are all sorts of reasons why a person might need to go, and need to go NOW.
Megan Contreras 2 months ago
For those that said to plan better clearly haven't had a 8 or 9 pound child use their bladder as a punching bag or some place to sit. The only way to "plan better" would be not to drink water for hours leading up to going out. On the same note, I can understand why they didn't let someone use the bathroom there could be sonny different ways it could go south including losing a job. I kind of understand. I have no good answer for this. I get both sides, it was just a tough situation where I don't think anyone was really in the wrong.
pyanfaruk 2 months ago
I had the same problem in a Sainsburys when the public loos were out of order. The manager escorted me to the staff ones, explaining that they couldn't let me go on my own because of the insurance rules. Waited outside for me, then escorted me back to the sales floor. Kudos to them for helping someone without breaking their rules.
arthbach 2 months ago
I own a shop. Our general rule is the loo is for members of staff. However, we will never deny access to someone who needs it. This might be for a child, an elderly person, someone with a disability, or those who are pregnant. There is a public loo about 5 minutes away, but there are are all sorts of reasons why a person might need to go, and need to go NOW.
Megan Contreras 2 months ago
For those that said to plan better clearly haven't had a 8 or 9 pound child use their bladder as a punching bag or some place to sit. The only way to "plan better" would be not to drink water for hours leading up to going out. On the same note, I can understand why they didn't let someone use the bathroom there could be sonny different ways it could go south including losing a job. I kind of understand. I have no good answer for this. I get both sides, it was just a tough situation where I don't think anyone was really in the wrong.
pyanfaruk 2 months ago
I had the same problem in a Sainsburys when the public loos were out of order. The manager escorted me to the staff ones, explaining that they couldn't let me go on my own because of the insurance rules. Waited outside for me, then escorted me back to the sales floor. Kudos to them for helping someone without breaking their rules.
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