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Person Shows The World How To Respond To Anti-Abortionists If They Call You A ‘Murderer’
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Abortion is a divisive topic, something that we’ve covered exhaustively here at Bored Panda. It is one of those things that people will never be able to really agree on. The chances of one ‘side’ changing their minds and being convinced by the arguments of the other are incredibly slim.
Still, there are effective and respectful ways of making your point about unwanted pregnancies, and anonymously contacting a person to call them a murderer is not one of them. Neither is camping out in front of Planned Parenthood to shout anti-abortion abuse at women getting check-ups.
This exchange, originally shared by the Insufferably Intolerant Science Nerd shows two vastly different methods of stating one’s position on abortion laws and ethics; we will leave it up to you to decide which is the most effective. If nothing else, the reasoned, thorough pro-abortion response perfectly puts into words what many people feel about so-called ‘pro-lifers’ and completely confounds the unsolicited, abusive accusations. Perhaps it could be one of the best comebacks to try if you ever find yourself harangued by placard-waving nutjobs at your local sexual health clinic?
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Here’s what people had to say about the testy exchange
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I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.
Read less » Mindaugas Balčiauskas
Author, BoredPanda staff
I'm a visual editor at Bored Panda. I kickstart my day with a mug of coffee bigger than my head, ready to tackle Photoshop. I navigate through the digital jungle with finesse, fueled by bamboo breaks and caffeine kicks. When the workday winds down, you might catch me devouring bamboo snacks while binging on the latest TV show, gaming or I could be out in nature, soaking up the tranquility and communing with my inner panda.
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James is a Bored Panda reporter who graduated with a BA in Peace And Conflict Studies and an MA in African Affairs. Before Bored Panda, he was an English teacher and also travelled a lot, doing odd jobs from beer-slinging to brickie's labourer and freelance journalism along the way. James loves covering stories about social and environmental issues and prefers to highlight the positive things that unite us, rather than petty internet squabbles about fictional characters. James is the grumpy, contradictory one who thinks that Bored Panda, due to its large audience, has a social responsibility to inspire and inform its readers with interesting issues and entertaining, well-researched stories. Let's do our bit to make our little corner of the internet a smarter, more truthful and less angry place!
Read less » James Caunt
Writer, Community member
James is a Bored Panda reporter who graduated with a BA in Peace And Conflict Studies and an MA in African Affairs. Before Bored Panda, he was an English teacher and also travelled a lot, doing odd jobs from beer-slinging to brickie's labourer and freelance journalism along the way. James loves covering stories about social and environmental issues and prefers to highlight the positive things that unite us, rather than petty internet squabbles about fictional characters. James is the grumpy, contradictory one who thinks that Bored Panda, due to its large audience, has a social responsibility to inspire and inform its readers with interesting issues and entertaining, well-researched stories. Let's do our bit to make our little corner of the internet a smarter, more truthful and less angry place!
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What do you think ?
Kusotare 5 years ago
"Pro-lifers" are not really pro-life. They're pro-birth. Whatever it takes to control women.
Aunt Messy 5 years ago
Call them what they are, and they are gestation slavers. All they want is to control and punish women.
Load More Replies...
Wil Vanderheijden 5 years ago
No, they don't even think of women. Women have no place in their lives. It's about having some uninformed opinion that must be forced upon everyone. This is about bigotry and self-proclaimed rules that everyone has to follow because their belief, their religion is the only one that's right. These are the same people that say that matrimonial rape doesn't exist, the people that have no problems with the deathpenalty, the people that think if you're poor and sick, you just should die but you sure aren't entitled to medical care.
Linda Sellers 5 years ago
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
You're wrong. You are obviously a feminist.
elfin 5 years ago
Agreed. If they were truly anti-abortion then they would support free and easy access to contraceptives for both genders and make sure people knew how to use them. No woman who wasn't pregnant ever had an abortion.
fruit_panda 5 years ago
Ryutora, abstinence is proven not to work. That's like saying we should get rid of the fire department and just be extra careful to not start fires.
Uwe Theiss 5 years ago
Healthcare is a right in every developed country. But you are right, where religious extremists rule a country, there everything is a bit more feudal.
J. Zingler 5 years ago
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
@Uwe Theis, healthcare is a right in every developed country. No it is NOT. Alone by the logic of the juridical system. So, you have the right to be treated by me? Nope. You have the right the community pays for your treatment? Nope. Your positive right to be treated by a doctor would be a duty for the doctor.Try coming out of your sociology bubble and try a little research about positive and negative rights. I recommend Jellinek.
Elizabeth Castle 5 years ago
I would contend that they are anti sex. I have been told by evangelists that pregnancy is a punishment for sex outside of marriage.
Nathan Whitesell 5 years ago
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
As a Christian, I can tell you it's not a punishment to get pregnant. It's a natural consequence of somebody's decision making, whether intentional or not. It ultimately comes down to the same issue as homosexuality, affairs among married people, premarital sex, murder, theft, lying; it all boils down to a lack of Godly fear. Creator of the universe gave us the manual on how things are supposed to be done, and for millenia we've been doing everything we can to deny His existence and His authority over us. That's all issues like this have ever been.
Han 5 years ago
If you see them picketing just pelt them with eggs. Sorry her spiel is correct, but I'm not taking that length of time to debate religion versus reality. It's egging time.
Linda Sellers 5 years ago
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This comment has been deleted.
Samhhain Cat 5 years ago
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****For white women. Their fear of becoming a white minority drives this opinion just as much as dumb religion the control of women does.
Lorraine R 5 years ago
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https://www.catholiccharitiesdc.org/sfl/ "Sanctuaries for Life (SFL) is a pregnancy support program that works to build a network of medical, tangible, emotional and spiritual assistance to women that make a life-affirming decision after facing an unintended pregnancy. This is accomplished through coordinating affordable prenatal/ labor delivery care, and linking to other support services such as food, rental/utility assistance, housing, mentoring, etc." http://www.gabrielproject.org/index.html "The Gabriel Project® offers hope and assistance to any woman experiencing a crisis pregnancy. We respect all life and see the birth of each child as a fresh expression of the unfailing love of God. Our concern is not only for the unborn child, but also for each and every mother in need." Just sayin'
Adi Fuchs 5 years ago
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Half of pro lifers are women. Half of pro choicers are men. How does that sit with your little narrative of a secret women controling cabal?
Hard 2 Guess 5 years ago
I disagree, you have this wrong. Half of pro lifers are men and half of pro choicer are women.
Mark Prasek 5 years ago
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Baseless claim. Merely a opinion.
Full Name 5 years ago
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Yes, all the men and WOMEN sit around a table, rubbing their hands thinking "how can we control women's bodies" *rolls eyes*. FFS, how about they actually believe life begins at conception? Why do you think it's a goddamn conspiracy?
Uwe Theiss 5 years ago
Why they stop thinking about life when its born? Life doesn't stop there but "pro-lifers" stop at that point. So it is pretty obvious that they give a s**t about the baby, they only want to controll women.
John Smith 5 years ago
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No Kusotare, it's the life part, trust me. Choose LIFE !
Robert Schneider 5 years ago
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If ""Pro-lifers" are not really pro-life, they're pro-birth", then it stands to reason that pro-choicers aren't really pro-choice, they're pro-murder. The only "control" involved is controlling the right of a baby to live. Has zero to do with controlling women, that's typical liberal rhetoric.
Linda Sellers 5 years ago
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Thank you, I agree with you Robert. These women don't even consider adoption, they'd rather kill their unborn baby. Makes me sick.
Biljana Malesevic 5 years ago
Pro-life people are scary. Some of them actually attack people who perform abortions, doctors and patients. how is that Pro life? Does pro life care about children when they are already born but not wanted for any reason at all (isn't there too many people in the world already? We are overpopulated!). Do they care about life of children who are born, wanted but sick or poor? Do they donate? Also, if they are so so so for life, do they respect every life? Every cat, puppy, spider, tree, every plant, in general living creatures? Or their lives don't matter, just human, and by that I mean humans who aren't even born yet. Becaise those that are born obviously don't matter.
Toujin C'Thlu 5 years ago
Pro-life is less about saving babies, and more about controlling women. I've noticed that once the baby is born, the pro-lifers suddenly lose all interest.
Load More Replies...
Cheryl Wilcox 5 years ago
Because what about the frozen embryos? People can discard their embryos when they've had their children. If life begins at conception, why are pro-lifers not protesting this? Because the embryos aren't inside a woman who needs to be controlled.
Full Name 5 years ago
Why is this the mantra of the pro lifers? Why the f**k is it the responsibility of the person who says "Don't have premarital sex, don't have kids you can't care for etc", why is it THEIR responsibility to care for the kid they told you not to have in the first place? I'm personally pro choice, but I f*****g hate the dishonesty of pro lifers on the whole.
Robert Schneider 5 years ago
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Where did you "notice" this? It amuses me how some people "know" what other people think and feel.
Nikki D 5 years ago
They killed our abortion doctor, Dr Tiller, in his church with his family and other families all around. The guy who did it is considered a hero to the anti abortion crowd.
Koalamonster 5 years ago
That's the one that always comes to mind for me. If you've never seen the documentary "Life After Tiller" I'd recommend it.
valery77 5 years ago
Because life matters, people shouldn't get pregnant, if you respect life, why to have sex without resbonsability? And then take the life of the baby? People keep dong it, and then they go for abortion, that's scary.
My Truth 3 years ago
You need to get a reality check - not all pregnancies come from consensual sex. This is not as black and white. Sometime even planned births get terminated for some reason or another. Things happen. Some people get to 12 weeks and something is going wrong, and parents have a tough choice to make. People act like it is such an easy choice just to walk in and terminate a pregnancy. People make choices every day some right some wrong, some harder then others. I know some who have had to make the choice, they live with it every day, but it was right for them. Before people go spout of respect life perhaps come up with some solutions first. Come up with a solution for a raped woman who ended up pregnant, what is her solution, what about a parent who has a fetus who is not growing properly and will have severe disabilities that leaves them confined and having to be cared for their entire life. At the end of the day it is a person choice it is not up to others to say it is wrong.
G13 5 years ago
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Hey Hunter, you got downvoted cuz they know they're wrong ((((:
Kristin Colyar 5 years ago
No, Hunter got downvoted because the evidence is literally available anywhere they look, all around them, easily available without too much trouble, and yet they smugly ask for evidence. Hunter got downvoted because apparently Hunter didn't read the f*****g post. Hunter got downvoted because Hunter wouldn't listen anyway.
John Smith 5 years ago
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Bilijana here uses the tired distraction tactic: they don't care about the kids when they're here. B******t! Bilijana was also once just a clump of cells, but look at her now! Choose LIFE !!
Justgail68 5 years ago
I am pro choice. I don’t like abortion, and here’s the but, but it has been around since women started having babies. In some cultures, yes even today, a pregnancy is carried out then the unwanted child is either killed or exposed to the elements to die. Yes there are some pro life places that give a pregnant woman support. The problem is we don’t hear about them and they are too few we too little support. I don’t believe in abortion being just another birth control method for that wild night you didn’t use protection. If you think of abortion like that you need to look for better birth control or even a permanent solution if you don’t want children. I would a woman had a safe place to terminate a pregnancy. Most women are not murderers and to scream that at women is beyond words. I weep for the society that doesn’t care for the young it forces women to bear.
anarkzie 5 years ago
I really doubt anyone likes having an abortion in the same way no one likes having to go through open heart surgery but sometimes you have to do s**t you don't like for a better future.
Load More Replies...
Robin Cole 5 years ago
So far no mention of adoption. My 13 yr old daughter was gang raped. She carried that baby to term and chose the parents she wanted to have him. All her choice.
My Truth 3 years ago
Her choice that is the key. It is the persons choice to do as they will. Sorry but I do not agree with people going after others who make that choice. If someone is prolife, then perhaps stop murdering Dr's or going after those who are making the choice. Some people have committed suicide because of pro lifers in their face because of a choice. So how is that pro life
valery77 5 years ago
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They should think about better future before having sex, Don't you think? I hate the fact that we have to finish with the life of babies just because we can't stop fornicating (in most of the cases) or not taking responsability in the case of married people.
My Truth 3 years ago
OMG sex is natural and it happens. You are a prude using fornicating. I was 16 years old with my first I raised her, my second I had a 20 I raised her. My third never came to term, why because I had an abortion, why because the fetus and I were killing each other. Oh I was on BC as well and with the father to this very day, we just were not married until many years later. Either it was me or the fetus, my antibodies and its antibodies creates this mess, I could not breath, I was getting constant infections, I could not even care for my two precious daughter. I was bleeding for weeks and there was nothing Dr's could do. My body was holding on to this pregnancy's even though it was no longer growing, all to find out this child would never have made it past a certain age as it has the same disease as my second daughter had, however this was a infantile stage and was already showing crystal formations and defect. So I made the choice, I always wonder what if, but it was the right choice
Steve Cruz 5 years ago
The DREAM of everyone who supports a woman's right to choose is that there will be a day when abortion is not needed. It's not an easy choice. Nobody is happy about it. Perhaps one day there will be perfect birth control and contraception -- and access for all, no rape or incest, well-informed people of all ages. But until then, we must fight for the right of a woman to choose.
My Truth 3 years ago
All valid and the reason why I do not see it being a problem. Your right it should not be a means of BC 100% and I am sure they do not just give abortions out, I am sure medical records would show multiple and the person would be denied. But you hit it dead on - China was prime example of babies being thrown in ditches to die, America how many babies die or are abandoned. It is a hard choice as a woman, and having a safe place to talk to someone and be presented with all options so they can make a informed choice and that is what I understand is done before they do the abortion. There is no joy or fun from an abortion, it is hard, it stays with you forever. But being forced into a situation creates more issues in the long run
Kusotare 5 years ago
"Pro-lifers" are not really pro-life. They're pro-birth. Whatever it takes to control women.
Aunt Messy 5 years ago
Call them what they are, and they are gestation slavers. All they want is to control and punish women.
Load More Replies... Wil Vanderheijden 5 years ago
No, they don't even think of women. Women have no place in their lives. It's about having some uninformed opinion that must be forced upon everyone. This is about bigotry and self-proclaimed rules that everyone has to follow because their belief, their religion is the only one that's right. These are the same people that say that matrimonial rape doesn't exist, the people that have no problems with the deathpenalty, the people that think if you're poor and sick, you just should die but you sure aren't entitled to medical care.
Linda Sellers 5 years ago
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
You're wrong. You are obviously a feminist.
elfin 5 years ago
Agreed. If they were truly anti-abortion then they would support free and easy access to contraceptives for both genders and make sure people knew how to use them. No woman who wasn't pregnant ever had an abortion.
fruit_panda 5 years ago
Ryutora, abstinence is proven not to work. That's like saying we should get rid of the fire department and just be extra careful to not start fires.
Uwe Theiss 5 years ago
Healthcare is a right in every developed country. But you are right, where religious extremists rule a country, there everything is a bit more feudal.
J. Zingler 5 years ago
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
@Uwe Theis, healthcare is a right in every developed country. No it is NOT. Alone by the logic of the juridical system. So, you have the right to be treated by me? Nope. You have the right the community pays for your treatment? Nope. Your positive right to be treated by a doctor would be a duty for the doctor.Try coming out of your sociology bubble and try a little research about positive and negative rights. I recommend Jellinek.
Elizabeth Castle 5 years ago
I would contend that they are anti sex. I have been told by evangelists that pregnancy is a punishment for sex outside of marriage.
Nathan Whitesell 5 years ago
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
As a Christian, I can tell you it's not a punishment to get pregnant. It's a natural consequence of somebody's decision making, whether intentional or not. It ultimately comes down to the same issue as homosexuality, affairs among married people, premarital sex, murder, theft, lying; it all boils down to a lack of Godly fear. Creator of the universe gave us the manual on how things are supposed to be done, and for millenia we've been doing everything we can to deny His existence and His authority over us. That's all issues like this have ever been.
Han 5 years ago
If you see them picketing just pelt them with eggs. Sorry her spiel is correct, but I'm not taking that length of time to debate religion versus reality. It's egging time.
Linda Sellers 5 years ago
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
This comment has been deleted.
Samhhain Cat 5 years ago
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****For white women. Their fear of becoming a white minority drives this opinion just as much as dumb religion the control of women does.
Lorraine R 5 years ago
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https://www.catholiccharitiesdc.org/sfl/ "Sanctuaries for Life (SFL) is a pregnancy support program that works to build a network of medical, tangible, emotional and spiritual assistance to women that make a life-affirming decision after facing an unintended pregnancy. This is accomplished through coordinating affordable prenatal/ labor delivery care, and linking to other support services such as food, rental/utility assistance, housing, mentoring, etc." http://www.gabrielproject.org/index.html "The Gabriel Project® offers hope and assistance to any woman experiencing a crisis pregnancy. We respect all life and see the birth of each child as a fresh expression of the unfailing love of God. Our concern is not only for the unborn child, but also for each and every mother in need." Just sayin'
Adi Fuchs 5 years ago
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Half of pro lifers are women. Half of pro choicers are men. How does that sit with your little narrative of a secret women controling cabal?
Hard 2 Guess 5 years ago
I disagree, you have this wrong. Half of pro lifers are men and half of pro choicer are women.
Mark Prasek 5 years ago
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Baseless claim. Merely a opinion.
Full Name 5 years ago
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Yes, all the men and WOMEN sit around a table, rubbing their hands thinking "how can we control women's bodies" *rolls eyes*. FFS, how about they actually believe life begins at conception? Why do you think it's a goddamn conspiracy?
Uwe Theiss 5 years ago
Why they stop thinking about life when its born? Life doesn't stop there but "pro-lifers" stop at that point. So it is pretty obvious that they give a s**t about the baby, they only want to controll women.
John Smith 5 years ago
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No Kusotare, it's the life part, trust me. Choose LIFE !
Robert Schneider 5 years ago
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If ""Pro-lifers" are not really pro-life, they're pro-birth", then it stands to reason that pro-choicers aren't really pro-choice, they're pro-murder. The only "control" involved is controlling the right of a baby to live. Has zero to do with controlling women, that's typical liberal rhetoric.
Linda Sellers 5 years ago
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Thank you, I agree with you Robert. These women don't even consider adoption, they'd rather kill their unborn baby. Makes me sick.
Biljana Malesevic 5 years ago
Pro-life people are scary. Some of them actually attack people who perform abortions, doctors and patients. how is that Pro life? Does pro life care about children when they are already born but not wanted for any reason at all (isn't there too many people in the world already? We are overpopulated!). Do they care about life of children who are born, wanted but sick or poor? Do they donate? Also, if they are so so so for life, do they respect every life? Every cat, puppy, spider, tree, every plant, in general living creatures? Or their lives don't matter, just human, and by that I mean humans who aren't even born yet. Becaise those that are born obviously don't matter.
Toujin C'Thlu 5 years ago
Pro-life is less about saving babies, and more about controlling women. I've noticed that once the baby is born, the pro-lifers suddenly lose all interest.
Load More Replies... Cheryl Wilcox 5 years ago
Because what about the frozen embryos? People can discard their embryos when they've had their children. If life begins at conception, why are pro-lifers not protesting this? Because the embryos aren't inside a woman who needs to be controlled.
Full Name 5 years ago
Why is this the mantra of the pro lifers? Why the f**k is it the responsibility of the person who says "Don't have premarital sex, don't have kids you can't care for etc", why is it THEIR responsibility to care for the kid they told you not to have in the first place? I'm personally pro choice, but I f*****g hate the dishonesty of pro lifers on the whole.
Robert Schneider 5 years ago
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Where did you "notice" this? It amuses me how some people "know" what other people think and feel.
Nikki D 5 years ago
They killed our abortion doctor, Dr Tiller, in his church with his family and other families all around. The guy who did it is considered a hero to the anti abortion crowd.
Koalamonster 5 years ago
That's the one that always comes to mind for me. If you've never seen the documentary "Life After Tiller" I'd recommend it.
valery77 5 years ago
Because life matters, people shouldn't get pregnant, if you respect life, why to have sex without resbonsability? And then take the life of the baby? People keep dong it, and then they go for abortion, that's scary.
My Truth 3 years ago
You need to get a reality check - not all pregnancies come from consensual sex. This is not as black and white. Sometime even planned births get terminated for some reason or another. Things happen. Some people get to 12 weeks and something is going wrong, and parents have a tough choice to make. People act like it is such an easy choice just to walk in and terminate a pregnancy. People make choices every day some right some wrong, some harder then others. I know some who have had to make the choice, they live with it every day, but it was right for them. Before people go spout of respect life perhaps come up with some solutions first. Come up with a solution for a raped woman who ended up pregnant, what is her solution, what about a parent who has a fetus who is not growing properly and will have severe disabilities that leaves them confined and having to be cared for their entire life. At the end of the day it is a person choice it is not up to others to say it is wrong.
G13 5 years ago
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Hey Hunter, you got downvoted cuz they know they're wrong ((((:
Kristin Colyar 5 years ago
No, Hunter got downvoted because the evidence is literally available anywhere they look, all around them, easily available without too much trouble, and yet they smugly ask for evidence. Hunter got downvoted because apparently Hunter didn't read the f*****g post. Hunter got downvoted because Hunter wouldn't listen anyway.
John Smith 5 years ago
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Bilijana here uses the tired distraction tactic: they don't care about the kids when they're here. B******t! Bilijana was also once just a clump of cells, but look at her now! Choose LIFE !!
Justgail68 5 years ago
I am pro choice. I don’t like abortion, and here’s the but, but it has been around since women started having babies. In some cultures, yes even today, a pregnancy is carried out then the unwanted child is either killed or exposed to the elements to die. Yes there are some pro life places that give a pregnant woman support. The problem is we don’t hear about them and they are too few we too little support. I don’t believe in abortion being just another birth control method for that wild night you didn’t use protection. If you think of abortion like that you need to look for better birth control or even a permanent solution if you don’t want children. I would a woman had a safe place to terminate a pregnancy. Most women are not murderers and to scream that at women is beyond words. I weep for the society that doesn’t care for the young it forces women to bear.
anarkzie 5 years ago
I really doubt anyone likes having an abortion in the same way no one likes having to go through open heart surgery but sometimes you have to do s**t you don't like for a better future.
Load More Replies... Robin Cole 5 years ago
So far no mention of adoption. My 13 yr old daughter was gang raped. She carried that baby to term and chose the parents she wanted to have him. All her choice.
My Truth 3 years ago
Her choice that is the key. It is the persons choice to do as they will. Sorry but I do not agree with people going after others who make that choice. If someone is prolife, then perhaps stop murdering Dr's or going after those who are making the choice. Some people have committed suicide because of pro lifers in their face because of a choice. So how is that pro life
valery77 5 years ago
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
They should think about better future before having sex, Don't you think? I hate the fact that we have to finish with the life of babies just because we can't stop fornicating (in most of the cases) or not taking responsability in the case of married people.
My Truth 3 years ago
OMG sex is natural and it happens. You are a prude using fornicating. I was 16 years old with my first I raised her, my second I had a 20 I raised her. My third never came to term, why because I had an abortion, why because the fetus and I were killing each other. Oh I was on BC as well and with the father to this very day, we just were not married until many years later. Either it was me or the fetus, my antibodies and its antibodies creates this mess, I could not breath, I was getting constant infections, I could not even care for my two precious daughter. I was bleeding for weeks and there was nothing Dr's could do. My body was holding on to this pregnancy's even though it was no longer growing, all to find out this child would never have made it past a certain age as it has the same disease as my second daughter had, however this was a infantile stage and was already showing crystal formations and defect. So I made the choice, I always wonder what if, but it was the right choice
Steve Cruz 5 years ago
The DREAM of everyone who supports a woman's right to choose is that there will be a day when abortion is not needed. It's not an easy choice. Nobody is happy about it. Perhaps one day there will be perfect birth control and contraception -- and access for all, no rape or incest, well-informed people of all ages. But until then, we must fight for the right of a woman to choose.
My Truth 3 years ago
All valid and the reason why I do not see it being a problem. Your right it should not be a means of BC 100% and I am sure they do not just give abortions out, I am sure medical records would show multiple and the person would be denied. But you hit it dead on - China was prime example of babies being thrown in ditches to die, America how many babies die or are abandoned. It is a hard choice as a woman, and having a safe place to talk to someone and be presented with all options so they can make a informed choice and that is what I understand is done before they do the abortion. There is no joy or fun from an abortion, it is hard, it stays with you forever. But being forced into a situation creates more issues in the long run
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