22 “Plus-Size Travel Struggles” Skinny People Don’t Have To Worry About When Traveling
Meet Jae'lynn Chaney, a 25-year-old travel blogger, body positivity advocate, and content creator out on a mission to help society unlearn harmful biases. She believes that all bodies can be travel bodies and that everyone deserves to travel comfortably. By covering anything from her wanderlust moments to the hurdles she encounters on the way, Jae has captured the internet’s heart.
With over 108,000 followers on TikTok, Jae recently went viral with her 'Plus-Size Travel Struggles' series where she lists the things "plus-size travelers hate" and highlights the issues in an industry still hostile to all bodies, sizes, and shapes.
In the videos, which amassed more than 16 million views on the platform, the TikToker evaluates her experiences and sheds light on how airlines, hotels, and other businesses consistently fail to accommodate larger-bodied globetrotters. Below, we gathered some illuminating examples Jae shared with her audience, from towels that don’t fit to tray tables that wouldn’t come down. So continue scrolling, upvote as you go, and be sure to share your own stories in the comments below, we’d love to hear all about them.
Body positivity advocate Jae'lynn Chaney recently went viral for sharing "things plus-size travelers hate" that highlight how the travel industry is still hostile to bodies of all sizes
Image credits: jaebaeofficial
You can watch Jae’s "Things Plus-Size Travelers Hate" series, which amassed over 16 million views, right below
@jaebaeofficial These are some of the struggles that plus size travelers face. Travel is possible for everyBODY, but it definitely comes with challenges and should be more accessible!! What travel challenges have you faced? #plussizetravel #plussizetravelblogger #flyingwhilefat #travellingwhilefat #travelingwhilefat #traveltok #plussize #plussizeedition #fyp ♬ Monkeys Spinning Monkeys - Kevin MacLeod & Kevin The Monkey
Here are some of the obstacles Jae faces when traveling
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People staring all the time.
People need to remember that manners are free. I once met a cyclops and didn't make a thing about it.
Jae’s incredible personality and powerful statements may have racked up millions of views, but they also deeply resonate with people struggling in a society obsessed with seemingly perfect looks and unrealistic beauty standards. This just goes to show just how absurd and flawed the travel industry is by failing "to realize that the average woman is no longer a size 14," as Jae said in an interview with BuzzFeed. "They are now a size 18 and beyond. Yet as we’ve gotten bigger, things like airplane seats, clothing, and everything else has gotten smaller or stayed the exact same."
To gain more insight into the struggles larger-bodied travelers face on their journeys, we reached out to animator, illustrator, and body positivity activist Stacy Bias aiming to amplify marginalized voices. "From running the Flying While Fat Facebook group for the last several years, I've witnessed thousands of concerns and I've learned that there are some experiences that are shared across the size spectrum," she told Bored Panda.
Not being able to find clothes your size anywhere.
As I mentioned on the "towels" post - using double or triple the material to create clothing that would "fit" an obese person costs double or triple the materials-cost to the company making it. Either companies are going to have to charge more for larger clothing sizes, as they literally use way more material to make them, or the cost of everyone's clothing, including normal-sized ones, are going to have to go up in order to cover the costs of manufacturing clothing sized for obese people.
Chairs with armrests.
Let's be explicitly clear: @jaebaeofficial you are not the victim here.
Being the creator of the research-led Flying While Fat documentary animation, she helps travelers make their voices heard by allowing them to share their experiences. And she was more than happy to chat about the infuriating, annoying, and stressful challenges plus-size people face.
According to Bias, anticipatory anxiety is a huge factor that affects folks' emotional well-being when flying — or even considering it. "What individuals anxiously anticipate does vary, but common themes are 'not fitting' and/or being re-seated or asked to deplane, needing to ask for a seatbelt extender and fearing potential humiliation at the hands of a potentially insensitive flight crew, or not having an extender available, rendering them unsafe."
Bias continued that needing to use the airline toilet can also cause dread: "Being afraid of not fitting through the narrow doors or having insufficient space to adequately engage in hygiene practices once inside." Moreover, fellow passengers seems to also be a source of anxiety as travelers may fear bumping or disrupting them "when traversing the aisles, or being seated next to someone who is hostile."
Always wondering if you're going to "fit" (airplane seats, public transportation, etc).
Who thought this would be a good topic?? Non-obese people will be afraid of down votes, while obese people are ether in denial (I'm not fat, I'm just thick), or don't want to come out admitting they don't like having to buy 2 airline seat tickets for their un-accommodated booties? In case I get downvoted to death, it was fun while it lasted (leaving snarky comments). Btw, my profile pic was from before Covid. From the pandemic comfort foods, menopause, my rheumatoid arthritis, and my lower back now needing multi-level vertabrae fusion, I gained 30 lbs, but am looking to get more active once I am allowed to after my fusion surgery. So, I am not sure if I would classify myself as in denial or plus sized yet
Tiny airplane bathrooms.
I feel like half of these complaints completely overlook the fact that there is limited space on a plane to begin with.
"For some at the smaller end of the size spectrum (within fat activism, the relevant categories are 'small fats' or 'medium fats'), these fears sometimes or even often prove unfounded," Bias continued. "For those at the higher end of the size spectrum ('large', 'super' or 'infini' fats), those anxieties are more often realized and are accompanied by physical barriers to access and safety as well."
The fear of "not fitting" causes a great deal of stress for plus-size people, as they often feel pressured to make decisions that would ensure a smooth experience. But sadly, they don’t come without a cost, whether it be financial, social, or wellness-related.
"Some are forced to purchase two seats or to navigate uncertainty in using inconsistently applied Customer of Size policies. And some, in fact, 25% of my research participants, intentionally dehydrate themselves before getting on planes to avoid having to use the restroom and/or stand up and disrupt seatmates or other passengers in the aisle, and both dehydration and lack of movement are risk factors in developing DVT [deep vein thrombosis]," Bias explained.
Worrying you're going to break the toilet.
The amount of fat-shaming comments on this are staggeringly disappointing. I foolishly thought humans on BP were better than this.
Obesity is usually self-imposed, not inherited. Outsiders cannot be blamed.
Load More Replies...I swear this list is made by a skinny person, I have worked in health care for 20 years and had 600lb plus patients and never had someone break a toilet.
Do they come out of the wall like that or are they a normal toilet that rests on the ground? Completely different.
Load More Replies...To some extent, I can sympathize with the obese. There's some people who actively keep track of their intake and exercise, but seem to keep gaining weight and size. But the average person who does get obese doesn't try, and have no regard for the people around them. Again, I often sympathize with the problems they deal with. But if you have to worry about breaking the toilet you sit on, you should consider skipping part of your meals, going on a few extra walks. If I walked into an airplane toilet and saw the last person had actually broken the seat, and I had to use it sitting down, I would be beyond pissed
Oh! I hate these wall hanged toilets! The landlord installed one in my old apartment and I moved out right after - I heard cracking sound when I sat down every time - and I weighed 95 kg! Can't sit down completely, had to do a "wall sit exercise" every time.
I mean, if your worried that your going to break a freaking toilet.. shouldn’t you maybe look a bit inwards and try to change things for yourself, instead of blaming everything else around you?
Let's be honest. If breaking a toilet is truly something you worry about it might be time to consider losing some weight.
You shouldn't worry about that fact.... If it brakes, it's not because of your weight, it's because the designer didn't think it through and didn't calculate the hold of a hanging toilet for more weight to keep.
The idea that larger-bodied people should be granted the same respect and opportunities as anyone else isn’t new. But the overwhelming response to Jae’s video series makes you wonder why this important conversation is so rarely touched upon. When we asked Bias to share her opinion on the matter, she told us this topic pops its head up once every now and then with a new person going viral with their experiences.
But unfortunately, "the cultural conversation around whose suffering is legitimate and what space people are entitled to when that space is highly commodified is once again held on the backs of fat people with no meaningful change at the end."
"It tends to bring on haranguing abuse from one side and supportive comments from the other, but on balance, there's been no measurable movement in creating safer and more equitable travel for passengers of all sizes and abilities," the activist added.
Restaurants that don’t have seating options for plus-size people.
Downvote me into oblivion, but I will die on this hill: most of the time, obesity isn't a disability in the same way that cerebral palsy is. Or being paralyzed, needing a wheelchair due to spinal/brain damage, only having one leg (or none), birth defects, having had a stroke or injury that results in brain damage, being blind, etc. Many of my family members are morbidly obese, and none were born that way. All of them became obese due to over-eating. While it's not always their FAULT that they became addicted to food, it's their responsibility to lose weight. It is not the world's responsibility to make everything accommodating for obese people. I've struggled with drug addiction, so I KNOW what addiction is like and how hard it is to change and get healthy. But saying it's a "disability" that you can't help or change is absolutely untrue. (Final disclaimer: yes, there are medical conditions that cause obesity without massive caloric intake. Most obese people are not obese due to that.)
Getting stuck with two twin mattresses instead of a king.
Book a queen/king room at the time of booking. If the hotel tries to force you into a room with two twin mattresses instead, demand the room you paid for (king/queen bed). You paid for the king/queen bed, you should GET the king/queen bed!
When asked about what kind of change is needed in the travel industry to make it more supportive of bodies of all sizes, Bias said, "I think the FAA [Federal Aviation Administration] needs to mandate an increase in minimum seat width and pitch and require that airplane safety testing and cabin design include a realistic distribution of body sizes, ages, and abilities."
Boat ladders, pool ladders, all ladders.
Really, why do they do this, it’s not like they run out of metal or something.
But it’s important to note that people can also seek change. "The FAA is currently accepting public comment on setting minimum seat widths and I would highly encourage people to voice their opinions."
Bias knows the FAA is not interested in the comfort of people in larger bodies, but they must pay attention to concerns regarding safety. "If a body does not have sufficient space or leverage to rise quickly, if a body has insufficient space to adopt a brace for impact position, if a body has insufficient space to overstep a neighbor or travel an aisle that may not be cleared of debris, then the plane is not safe for anyone," she said. "Current airplane configurations present a risk to wellness for all passengers and this must be rectified."
Very limited poolside seating/lounging options for plus-size people.
Try 'can't even get into the pool because it has no wheelchair hoist' that's the case for like 95% of hotel pools, even ones with accessible rooms! Least obese people can sit on the floor/ still access the pool!
To anyone struggling with travel anxiety and fearing the industry will fail to cater to their needs, Bias offered some words of encouragement. "Find community. Ask questions. And don't put yourself in harm's way to avoid inconveniencing others."
"Understand that capitalism is the driving force in creating the medians upon which built space is constructed, and that very fat, very tall, very short, and disabled bodies are excluded from the processes of determining those medians. Bodies have always been and will always be diverse, and for a diversity of reasons. You are worth accommodation," Bias concluded.
Souvenir shops that don't have your size.
as a former fat woman who struggle this A LOT. Since childhood with awful comments an rejection let me tell you: its your life, that’s no way to live, we both know you want to feel better, i was not happy, ir hurts every day. I learned at the hard way hurting my self worried of what others see. They are not important, probably never see them again, you need to do it for you, not for others opinions. I know how hard it is, even coming from my mom who don’t even want to sit next to me on an airplane because she was ashamed of me. It’s not normal been so beautiful and young and need to use oxygen, if you need to talk I’m here, trust me you are not alone. I’m 35 now and I don’t care if anyone sees my cellulitis, scars, stretch marks, I love them because now I’m feeling better, that’s the only think that matter, the way I look to myself, no by others.
Not being able to find accessible path and hiking trails.
But in the end, the content creator says the experience makes it totally worth it
Image credits: jaebaeofficial
Viewers jumped to the comments to express overwhelming support and chime in with their own experiences
I’ll say it…I’m all for body positivity, and I am fully aware that there are, at times, legitimate health issues (mental and/or physical) that cause obesity. We have to be honest though, there must be a point at which we temper our support by also saying that it is in no way healthy and should not be celebrated for the people that fall outside there being actual medical reasoning behind the obesity. Yes, it’s a grey area, a very broad one, and it’s complicated, but we shouldn’t just throw blind support and celebration behind people without acknowledging hard truths when necessary.
Most people are just fat. No excuses. 80% of their medical problems would go away if they lost weight. (From me, an overweight person.) yes thyroid and fluid edema etc. but MOST people are not fat for those reasons. To back you up, fat and the way we treat others should not go together. Everyone should be treated with respect.
Load More Replies...Coming from an obese person, the world doesn't owe you anything just because you eat yourself into obesity.
You should write a list about traveling when being in a wheelchair! It's harder than this list and we can't do a single thing to be none disabled yet 99% of obese people can make steps to losing weight. Yes I know some people are obese because of medical reasons but the vast majority of obese people can lose weight by eating less/ eating better/ moving more. People can choose to be whatever size they want, but if they are overweight because of a none medical issue then I'm sorry I have little sympathy if they struggle with the above- when they have a way to stop it being an issue.
Thank you for commenting, I came looking for someone else recognizing that accommodations while traveling are way worse for folx with disabilities. They can't or won't accommodate for persons in wheelchairs, people who are blind or even people who are over a certain height. To accommodate the morbidly obese, before fixing other discrimination, would be a slap in the face. I wonder if this woman has ever been asked to ride in the cattle car of a train, because that's how many train networks handle a paid passenger in a wheelchair.
Load More Replies...I don't know... feel a little hesitant about this. I get tall people have similar struggles in flights, toilets, clothing, etc, but they have no choice. My brother is about 270 pounds (120 kg) and about 6'1 feet tall (1.85 mt) and he chooses to be overweight. Even got to the gym so he could eat more. What i'm going to is that, unless you have a condition, being morbidly obese by choise is not rational at all, cause you'll have to adapt to a world suited to certain sizes, not the other way around. Sorry if I sound insensitive, cause I know food can be a coping mechanism to some people struggling with trauma, but just makes no sense to me for you to became a burden to yourself. It's isn't just starving to death, takes a lot of work to get into a more healthier diet, but try to make an effort, is not near good to use oxygen just to walk around or have open scalds around your thights every time you walk. Please take care of yourself a little better, not for others, but for yourself.
The sad irony is that in order to lose weight, people need to exercise which means they need oxygen to walk around and will end up with raw, irritated thighs.
Load More Replies...I see bored panda chose to leave out the comments from tiktok that are more negative. I understand body positivity is an important movement and I fully support it! However, my only concern is when being an individual's weight gets to a number where the person's health is at a significant risk due to increased risk of heart issues and other problems.
Bored Panda seems to do that a lot lately. Very one-sided posts/threads. Like with this one, there is an actual health risk involved. Advertising that obesity is fine (when it is not) can lead to a lot of health risks/fatalities.
Load More Replies...As a former obese person, I just CANNOT get on board with this "body positivity" business, no matter how hard I try. I've been obese pretty much all my life, and I KNEW that wasn't the way it should be, that it was an unnatural state to be in. The last thing I would have ever wanted was for the rest of the world to cater to my inconveniences, because I was the one who was responsible for them, and no one else. I finally lost 42 kilos last year (only 5 to go!), and I can wholeheartedly say that I finally feel fully human now. Even when I was still obese I couldn't get on board with this positivity c**p; it feels forced, and to be honest, like a massive joke.
I lost 34 kgs about 13 years ago, and have weighed the same ever since. Simply a matter of counting calories. It really does make you feel better about yourself.
Load More Replies...As an engineer we learn to solve for the 80%. Often times it’s impossible to solve for 100% of the problems. Air planes for example. What’s more important, passenger comfort, or passenger safety? If we start making aisles and seats and bathrooms larger, we have to make the entire plane larger, which means more fuel/fuel consumption. It means larger planes overall. I’m not an aerospace engineer but that sounds like a lot of problems to solve for a smaller population. Not to mention the economics of replacing an entire fleet of planes for the sake of comfort. I’m all for body positivity, but I’m also for people advocating for themselves. If you know you are afraid to fly, or it’s uncomfortable, find an alternative. Don’t wait in the world to solve your problems for you.
As someone who gained 3* her weight due to antidepressants and antipsychotics the comments on this posts are disheartening. I walk 8500-9500 steps per day, workout 30 minutes per day. Work full-time, have a family that needs my care and attention, plus volunteer work, I don't see what more I can do to not gain weight. Stopping my medication? The weight will melt from my body, but I would loose my family, my job, my drivers license, probably go psychotic or become so suicidal that I truly end life. With my medication I stay what is generally called "normal".
Yuki, don't stop your medication. You're doing fine and all you can do. Please don't take the nasty comments to heart. HUGS.
Load More Replies...My response to a lot of these is along the lines of "yeah, I guess that sucks for you, but what exactly do you expect anyone to do about it?" There's not a lot of room on planes due to, well, the size of planes. Clothing manufacturers/retailers shouldn't be expected to produce/stock clothes for every conceivable body size or shape - from a practical and economic standpoint it makes no sense. I'm tall - not freakishly, but enough that I'm an outlier - and have trouble finding clothes that fit, public transport is awkward, sinks and countertops are all too low causing me chronic back ache from bending down, I am prone to hitting my head on things, but I don't expect the entire world to reconfigure itself to accommodate me - there's a point where making stuff fit *me* better means it'll fit the majority of people worse. If you're overweight and it's causing you difficulties, maybe don't blame the world, maybe consider losing weight instead? At least you have that option.
People claim they want obese people to lose weight for their health and wellbeing. Then they proceed to spew cruelty and contempt, making it very obvious that they never cared about people's wellbeing in the first place. You can wish better for someone, and still treat them kindly.
Well said! I think one of the main points that a lot of commenters are failing to mention is the unwanted weight gain and extreme fluctuations in weight that some medications used to treat chronic illnesses or treat mental health problems cause. I have a friend who won her battle with cancer and a younger cousin who received a heart transplant and are on very potent cocktail of medications to alleviate symptoms. However, many of these medications cause water weight gain and drastic fluctuations in weight. Someone who is battling a horrible disease shouldn’t be stigmatized because their treatments cause weight gain. This is why I’m really working on being less judgmental.
Load More Replies...I want wider airplane seats because I hate it when my neighbor is touching me. And it’s not a size issue. Some people just have no sense of personal space. I don’t want your sweaty flesh pressed up against me for 2 hours. I understand a larger person sometimes can’t help it, but the airline or plane manufacturer can.
I sat in between two men in a flight once and I didn't have an armrest then either.
Load More Replies...I'm all for body positivity. However, I will not accept that someone chooses to stay at an unhealthy weight and expect the world around them to change. For most, it's something you can change--never mind genetic issues, diseases, etc--it's not your height or something that cannot be changed or "fixed".
It's not always a choice, which is a point I keep trying to make to the "calories in calories out" crowd. Some people are overweight because of their choices for sure, some don't have control over the weight they carry and come kindness and compassion aimed at *everyone* would go a long way.
Load More Replies...I am also morbidly obese. I have the same issues the OP does. I can barely walk, and have difficulty breathing. I have diabetes, congestive heart failure, hypertension, lymphoedema, and several other serious health issues. I've had most of these conditions most of my adult life, even when I was of a fairly normal weight. Would losing weight significantly improve my medical conditions? Yes. Would losing weight cure my medical conditions? No. I'm unable to walk more than the length of my house. I have serious breathing problems. I cannot exercise. I think the only chance I have to lose weight is by surgery. Why haven't I gotten the surgery? I'm addicted to food. I'm very afraid that I'd go right back to pushing my stomach into either pulling out the stitches or growing even larger. Do I deserve to be catered to? No. Do I deserve to be fed, clothed, and housed to the best of my ability? Yes. Do I deserve to have access to the world? Yes. Do I deserve to me hated on? No. Do I deserve to be told I'm destroying my body? Why do you want to tell me this? Don't you think I already know? Do I deserve to be called ugly, lazy, or disgusting? I feel ugly, always have. I'm pretty lazy, yes. It's just too damned hard to move, and I have to force myself to try. Yes, I know I'm disgusting. Every time I see any part of myself, I'm disgusted. Will your telling me these things help? No. Do I hate myself? Absolutely. I feel like Shelob. I am very grateful to the few people who can see past the rolls of fat to see me. I am still in here. I just feel completely helpless and worthless. Would losing weight help with my mental state? Yes. Do I need you to tell me this? No.
Well you're more self aware than the vast majority of people I've ever met, me included.
Load More Replies...Okay, as a fat person who falls in the morbidly obese category, let me say that many of the things listed as 'fat people hate' are self-inflicted problems, unless the person has a medical condition. (Narrow aisles, chairs with arms, plane seats and bathrooms, chub rub). Embarrassed to ask for a seatbelt extender? Carry your own, they're easily purchased online. Restaurants often can accommodate if you ask. Places without accessibility? Frustrating but that's life.
Christ, this thread is a dumpster fire. Not supporting someone’s choices doesn’t mean you have to be a d**k.
People that say that obese individuals just need to suck it up and lose the weight need to look up Drew Manning. He trained obese people to get them to lose weight and thought their excuses as to why they couldn't were just whining. He gained 70 lbs with the intention to prove them wrong. He was the one proven wrong. He said the aches and pains along with the depression made it hard for him to even get off the couch. Worse than that, the depression and pain made him want to eat more of all the bad foods because they gave him a moment where he felt good. That's called addiction...and it's hard to escape it. You know your actions aren't healthy, but you do it anyway because it makes you feel good, even just for a little while. And, unlike alcohol and heroin, you can't just give up food entirely...you have to eat. I used to run 4 miles everyday in High School when I was 126lbs. Now I get winded just doing household chores at nearly 300 lbs. It's not all suck it up and do it.
But sometimes it is suck it up and do it. This argument is bull because life is hard for most humans. But some of us choose to suck it up and do it so we can live longer. Do more fun things. Spend a longer life with loved ones. I have never liked working out. Yet I do so because I want to hopefully be around for my daughter as long as I can. Life is hard and sucks for almost everyone. Get some accountability and yes suck it up and make your life better.
Load More Replies...Ah here I am again, being horrified at the hateful comments people have about fat people. Did you know there was a study done but the University of Pennsylvania that found fat shaming doesn't make people want to lose weight - it leads to more weight gain. You know why? Because people who care about their bodies take better care of themselves. Telling someone they're ugly, gross, don't deserve to be in society - what do you think that does to a person's care for themselves? ALSO not everyone is going to be a size 6 with diet and exercise. Genetics are at play for one, also conditions like PCOS, Lipodemia, Hashimoto's, certain medications, lots of other diseases. So, while it might make YOU feel better about yourself to be openly vile to someone because they are fat, it isn't "helping" like you might think it is.
Here's some info about a different study in the UK - same results. https://www.theguardian.com/society/2014/sep/11/fat-shaming-lose-weight-study
Load More Replies...According to the BMI, I am in obese territory. However, I am tall for a woman (5'11"), and have more muscle, my doctor says I am healthy as a horse (a healthy one), great BP, sugar, amd so in, but I have had thyroid issues, easily managed with meds, and we discovered a staggeringly low vitamin D level in 2020, so I take a drop of vitamin D on my tongue everyday. Anyway, my point is I have never had any of these issues. The only problem I have on a plane is that have to sit a bit sideways, or my knees dig into the back of the seat in front of me. The bathrooms are fine. It's kind of weird to think that I may weigh in the same ballpark as some if these people, but am proportioned differently. It's easy to understand why BMI is so criticized.
I loved how most of the BP comments were "just lose weight", and "you did this to yourself" until it came to the part about not being able to hike. Then it was "you're too fat to find a trail that would suit you" and "look at you. Why would you even try it". Is she supposed to lose weight or is she supposed to give up and sit in the corner while thin people have fun? This is why I start to think that when people say that they worry about fat people for their own health they are lying. Otherwise there would be more support when she says she wants to be even remotely active, not "you're fat, why?"
1) she said herself that she needs accessible hiking trails & can't find any. accessible hiking trails *shouldn't* be made, they flatten & often pave over nature to make it easier for people to navigate, but it harms the environment. she shouldn't be pushing for people to destroy nature on her behalf, it's entitled & selfish. 2) if she found herself exhausted & unable to finish a hike, or god forbid she gets injured somehow, a rescue team would have to spend time & resources looking for her & bringing her back, which would likely not be straightforward at all due to her weight. if she was hurt, it may even worsen her injury or prolong the time it takes for her to reach a hospital due to the complications of getting her back to civilization. for someone her size, hiking should be a goal to work towards, not a first step on her journey to losing weight. 3) there are so many other exercises she could do that would be safer for her, where she can take a break or stop without being stranded
Load More Replies...I don't like body positivity - it comes accross as fake. We're not all beautiful, and not all bodies are healthy. What we need is body neutrality. The expectation that all bodies are accepted. That society should make room for people of all sizes and abilities and treat all people with dignity and compassion.
For me body positivity does mean body neutrality instead of people just picking on fat people who they feel less than for some reason. Beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder, but how many people commenting on weight in this thread would openly bash someone for being "ugly"?
Load More Replies...My comment will probably be buried here somewhere and not be read, but I need to vent after reading through half this list... Body positivity movement is NOT about supporting obesity. Obesity is classified as an illness. It IS an illness. Even if you feel fine by staying obese and acting like it's not a big deal and eating more and more is causing problems to your body and organs that you will only find out when it's too late. Original body positivity is about accepting things you can't change or had an option about. Like - my nose is big, but I won't let it ruin my psychology or run to get a plastic surgery for it. - My ears are protruding? So what! I like them! - my feet are bigger than average woman's? I won't get depressed over it... Not talking about medical conditions that can promote obesity. But 90% of obese people HAVE a choice. So don't come bothering me with your "inconveniences" for YOUR choices
I find all of this very motivating and read it more like a warning label. I wish she would have mentioned the chronic pain one suffers when overweight. I was 50 lbs. over after my second child. The pain of carrying the extra weight was excruciating and my greatest motivator. I can only imagine how physically painful it must be to be morbidly obese. I can't imagine wanting to travel in that much pain.
I'm obese and disabled. The idea that people are obese because of overeating is ridiculous to me. Me and my boyfriend have been living together, eating the exact same, doing the exact dame activities, still he's underweight and continues being and I'm obese and continue being. I never ate half the c**p "normal" people eat because it disgusts me (pizza, fast food, lasagna, all those things known as fat foods I never liked) and even though I did overeat as a child due to food insecurity and fear of starving in the future, when I was around 16yo I started to struggle to eat. I've had people scream at me to eat, and tough I've never been tested for an eating disorder I'm no idiot and I can clearly tell there is something wrong with the way I act towards food. Food disgusts me, I have to eat without thinking about it or else it becomes impossible to eat, I've lived since my childhood thinking eating and hunger is a defect to be surpassed, the more I see people say I'm fat because I eat the
the more I want to stop once and for all. And still I'm obese. And still people will acuse me of overeating, of not wanting to lose weight. When am I not overeating? When my family yells at me that I need to eat or will end up in the hospital being given meds that will make me even fatter? I don't understand. I'm not even that fat as this lady, all issuea I even met in an airport where due to being disabled, not due to beign fat. But what the heck am I supposed to do? I can't even walk to do what I want due to my disabilities how the heck am I supposed to for an activity? I've been on a diet for more than a year and my appearance continues the same even if the scale says otherwise (I supposedly lost around 12-14kg). What am I supposed to do? Eating healthy? Already do eat as my nutritionist said, and I have the advantage of loving it unlike other people that treat that like a chore. Not eating at all? Throwing up what I eat? Tell me the y'all, since you love so much to say being fat is
Load More Replies...What a hard life. You can choose to have that size, I am almost 7 feet tall but skinny. I cant change that, you can. Unbelieveable to cry about your mess, guess what, towels are to short, clothes never fit, fat people always order the xxl seats and i am sitting with my knees touching my ears in the plane seats, pools are not deep enough, toilets are to low, people are watching, tables are too low, beds and blankets are not long enough etc. I really really can feel your pain 🤣
The world accomodates the average person. We’re not going to make everything big because some people are fat. It’s just not feasable. Very tall people have the same problem, and very short people, and very skinny people and people with unusual body shapes, etc. I mean, fat people at least have an option to change. Being tall or short is worse.
But what you're asking for is that people to take responsibility for themselves . But it's easier for them to blame other people.
Load More Replies...I am not obese but overweigth and with a severly damaged ankle and thus limited mobility. I would never DREAM of complaining about lack of accesible hiking paths. There are accessible hiking paths, but of course not everywhere! How could there be? The world does not exist for tourists and we do not have the right to go anywhere we fancy. I cannot climb a mountain, I cannot explore rugged caves, I can't waterski or do anything else that puts a ton of pressure on my ankle. So what? Shall we level all of the world, now so everybody can get everywhere? How about installing a ton of elevators in Grand canyon? Hack roads into every last nature reserve so that anybody can see everything without any effort whatsoever? Oh, and I can't stay in very hot places and in the sun for long. Can someone please build a roof over the Sahara desert? I want to see it and I feel left out.
I find it interesting that BP thinks you should to refer to people as "plus size" rather than "obese" or "fat" but it's fine to refer to others as "skinny" rather than "slim" or "average size".
Being treated as a lesser human being. In the last 18 months I've lost 120lbs. Went from 305 to 185. I am now 'seen' in public... people hold the door for me, people (especially men) give me the right of way, more people initiate small talk, smile at me, etc... Fat people experience microaggressions that 'acceptably' sized people don't. Who I am as a person hasn't changed, my personality hasn't changed, but how strangers treat me in public has. It's really sad to know that people saw you as a less deserving person simply because you were fat. I'm still a size 12 but the amount of skinny privilege I have now is insane.
I'll bet a lot of that behaviour is down to increased self confidence though. There are people who are fat and confident and get the smiles and smalltalk, but if you tried to hide yourself and were not self confident then you're not likely to attract attention.
Load More Replies...Sorry but you choose to eat yourself into obesity and then expect the world to accommodate you?
I'm not sure what the primary purpose of this post is? If its about people judging you by your appearance and lack respect I absolutely agree with you - that's terrible and should stop. Or to highlight issues most people don't think of? Also great, we need to have an understanding to be more compassionate. If it is that everything should be designed to fit all? that's a great ambition but sadly not possible. We can't make everything fit everyone because we all come in different sizes and with different abilities. (But I absolutely think she should be able to bring awareness to her struggles without any hate regardless)
"body positivity advocate" in this case apparently means fat, imposing on other people, and unashamed by their behavior.
Heres the thing. Planes can only get so big. You cant make wider seats and wider isles and bigger bathrooms and bigger everything. if seats get wider, isles get narrower. if isles get wider, seats get narrower.
Seats used to be wider. Airlines just want to pack people in for more money.
Load More Replies...I'm sorry but I don't feel ya. You do not have a fatal disease (in the short run) and it's something you can at least do something about!! Those armwrests are there for a reason, it's not an evil plan to make obese people look bad!! Sorry but I would hate sitting next to you!! I payed for my seat and I don't want to be all squished by you!! Maybe think about how much you are encroaching on other peoples spaces! Book two seats instead of complaining.
the world doesn't owe anyone anything. If everyone who feels wronged would post something like this we'd never find peace... i am sort, like really short do you know all the things i could complain about because "the world is designed for tall people" here in Europe?.. how i can't find clothes, how i can't properly cook in a kitchen without needing something to step up...how my knees hurt because my feet are never touching the ground while sitting.. how people ignore my existence in public transportation, how i can' reach up the shelf in a store.. how i am not allowed on rollercoasters, how everyone always asks me for my ID... I can't change my size.. you as obese person could actually do something about that... and maybe the struggles get a little bit less bothering... or just accept it and stop complaining?
Amen to this! I'm also short. No one is providing me with accommodations to reach things on the higher shelves at the grocery store. No one is making pants that I don't have to pay to have altered. No one is paying for how messed up my knees and back are from wearing heels all of the time so I can be "tall enough" to function. So yeah, I fit in airplane seats and chairs at restaurants but I don't complain about how my feet swing like I'm a small child when I use a restroom. We all deal with our own stuff and I can't wrap my head around how any one particular person gets to think the world should revolve around them (of course I don't think that applies to those that are genuinely disabled but I 100% judge people who get handicapped placards because they're too obese to walk from their car to a store. Maybe if they walked the extra 100 yards they wouldn't be in that situation.)
Load More Replies...Look at all these points listed here. If that doesn’t make you loos weight…what will?
Lose weight. When did it become necessary for the majority to bow down to the small minorities all the time.
I really do get this but at some point we can't make adjustments. Probably planes can use the bulkhead row with only two seats. I do know of hiking trails that are accessible but you have to choose those trails. And stores can at least accommodate some of these things but we can't just reconfigure an entire plane. I'm 195 but used to be 325. I'm just glad I don't need the seatbelt extension any more and my butt fits in the seats.
Normally the people of Bored Panda are some of the nicest on the entire internet. The comments here broke my heart because despite y’all thinking you were funny; you just emphasized this ladies points. If you are fat, it is okay to point and stare and make all the negative comments you would like. Who would have thought a post about a lady seeking to understand her world and help others understand also would have turned the Bored Panda community into the lowest of the low.
This was really nasty and mean spirited of BoredPanda staff to post this. This is such a complex topic that I feel has a lot of “grey” area. One thing that I think a lot of people are missing is the unwanted weight gain and fluctuations in weight that may occur due to medications prescribed for mental health problems and other illnesses like cancer. Many antipsychotics used to treat depression, anxiety, and severe ADHD can cause fluctuations in weight and water weight gain. Furthermore, many of the medications to treat some types of cancer or transplant patients also cause weight gain. People who are battling illnesses should never have to be unfairly judged for weight gain due to medications or treatments.
Load More Replies...I don't think this article is saying that everything needs to be different for her. It's talking about the ways being obese changes the travel experience for her. Whether it's "her fault" or not is a complex discussion. But I'm really annoyed at all the comments here dunking on fat people in general when literally this is about her sharing what her experiences are. You know those #sorelatable things? A lot of this stuff is relatable, and I'm only moderately plus-sized. I fit in an airplane seat, etc. But the towels are tiny, and chub rub is real. Maybe there are ways to respond to these, like bringing a bath sheet or deodorant/baby powder. But are people not allowed to talk about these things without being CONSTANTLY reminded that it's their own dang fault, they're so gross, they shouldn't be that way, etc? There's nothing brave about saying fat people shouldn't be fat. Solutions are when we can listen to people's experiences with compassion and respect them on their journey.
If you're like Lizzo, twerking and moving your a*s around, be my guest. If you need oxigen to get out of the house you really need to do something. Dunno if this lady is, but most of the complaints were "seats are too small", when l think that's the least of her problems right now.
It is not the world that doesn’t fit you, it is you that has grown to a size where you no longer fit the world, you didn’t wake up one day like this it happened over time, with things gradually getting harder instead of thinking “oh I might want to change this” you doubled down and got bigger and bigger. You had warnings that your size was becoming a problem but you chose to ignore them
Remember downvoting on this site is for spam NOT because you have a different opinion. Down vote me to hell and get me banned if it means that much to you. But, have some of these people just tried to ... I dunno... not be fat fockers!? I understand that a small minority actually have genetic or chromosonal disorders... but that is the minority. How about instead of whining that the world doesn't cater to your exact sodding fatness you actually come to the realisation that if you can no longer fit on a toilet seat or manage to drag your body through a turnstyle the problem may be you? Sheesh. I have my problems but I dont expect the whole world to tailor around me. If the entire rest of the world doesn't fit your, solvable, issue then perhaps you are the problem? Stop suger coating it. This woman is fat. She could own it (all the power to her) or complain. If you own it you accept that you ain't going to fit and make your own adaptions. If you complain you fail to recognise that you are the problem. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.
Yeah guys, just remember, no matter our difference in opinions, the downvote should only be used for when people are using hate speech or they are bots as this does get people banned!
Load More Replies...I hope you are also trying losing weight while doing all of these travels. Obesity is dangerous
So here's a question. If being inclusive of extremely fat people is expected as the norm does this mean there is no cut off weight? For example if 1, 10 or 100 people at 700 lbs want to travel by plane then is it the airline's fault for not having facilities for them? Being rude or nasty to anyone about their looks is totally unacceptable but being fat shouldn't be encouraged. In the same way being too thin, smoking, and other life choices that effect your health should not be encouraged.
No one is encouraging it...we're just saying stop pretending to be concerned for people you don't know. Someone's weight is not something that should be ridiculed by others, whether they are thin or big.
Load More Replies...A big assumption is that weight is 100% due to personal choices or like an addiction. I know a lot of women who are currently struggling with or have come out of addictions. Do you think they don't know that it's messed up their life? Would you tell a former addict, struggling to find a job or housing or getting her kid back from foster care, that she has no right to complain and that her situation was all her own fault? Do you think someone in that situation would "appreciate the honesty", or would she go and confide in her counselor and sponsor that no matter how much progress she makes, people will always see her as a loser first and a human second. Now apply that logic to weight. Even IF it is a parallel case, "honestly" and "helpfully" pointing out their life choices while they are in the very process of addressing them is NOT brave, or honest, or progressive. It is just one more way you see someone as their problem first and a human second.
I know I've been commenting a lot, but please have some compassion. Let's assume for a moment that weight is 100% a result of personal choices (which it isn't, but let's set that aside.) So exercising is an important step, right? That means walking (chub rub, supportive shoes that fit, accessible paths), swimming (pool ladders, towels, swimsuits that fit), gym equipment (weight-bearing seats), exercise clothes (that are big enough), and most importantly, ENCOURAGEMENT in fitness spaces instead of derision, are all super important in that journey. So let's not all dump on people when we point out that these are very real barriers! Not that they can't be overcome, but that we can stop blaming people who are trying to exercise for pointing out that there are extra barriers for the people who might need it most.
I'm six feet tall. I can't change that. I accept that there are situations that will be uncomfortable for me, so if I choose to put myself in the situation, I deal with it. No whining, no complaining, and I certainly don't blame everyone else. Fat is not a disability and one should not expect, demand or think one "deserves" anything.
Now I feel like I need to ask a Little Person their struggles while traveling. Imagine how difficult and unsafe it must be for an adult who is under 5ft
Yes, and they ACTUALLY have no/ very little control over their size, unlike this woman
Load More Replies...I understand the difficulties of being super-obese, I was once too. Hopefully you will recognize the major issue is your health not the inconvenience of being super obese. I had symptoms of a heart attack and was admitted to the hospital. My treadmill study reproduced the heart attack symptoms. My doctor admitted me on Thanksgiving day for a work up with a cardiac cath. He told me if it was positive I would have bypass the next day. Luckily I didn't have blocked arteries but I did have angina chest pain caused by super-obesity. I was 42 and had four young kids. It scared me enough that I dieted and exercised and lost 185 pounds. I don't think we should shame super obese people, but they need to face the health reality of the demands their weight is putting on their hearts and bodies. You may be ok in your 20s and 30s but it will catch up to you.
We are all of us one bad day away from facing catastrophic metabolic issues that mean we're screwed re: weight/mobility/etc. OK? Brain tumor screwed it up for my mom. I had an accident and gained 25 pounds before relearning to walk. Job loss so you can only afford the cheapest (crappiest) food. Psychological trauma. Reaching a certain age. The day your DNA kicks in and overrides your desires. Just be kind! That could be you! Judge only as you want to be judged ----- with compassion. Or STFU. Signed, a medical doctor, from the US.
I'm not a skinny person and I'd like to think I'm fully supportive of body positivity, but this isn't it! The lady is obese, and in my opinion she's promoting unhealthy choices.
Plus size & super-obese are NOT the same. This woman needs one hell of a reality check. She is not plus sized, she's super sized & the rest of the world shouldn't cater to her because she can't control her eating habits. Wtf. Buy your two seats on the plane like you stretched your body to need, & don't climb the ladder you couldn't climb down from since you couldn't possibly see the next step past your stomach & sit down like you've been doing.
i don't care until they don't take up my space. I'm more pissed with manspreading all over
I think it’d be fantastic if every place made larger seats and seating areas. Imagine having more room to stretch out and not being squished in? This is a win for people of all sizes.
As a builder, I can say that probably won’t happen. Just like airlines most businesses care about that bottom dollar. Building or making bigger costs more money. So you probably won’t be seeing that.
Load More Replies...I'm sorry but if you're so worried then why not do something about it if you can
This was indeed the dumbest post. I get that certain fat people have medical conditions, take medication etc that makes them over weight. I get that. But those people are the vast minority in the obese world. I’m really starting to get sick of all the lack of accountability. If these things worry you when you travel and you have the ability to better yourself, then for farts sake change your life. Quit making excuses and change. And for all the enablers and body positivity activists on this site. Y’all should be ashamed of yourself too. Being obese is not good for your health. Mental, physical or other wise. Stop making excuses for these people. They are killing themselves faster than an average sized person. And for all the rest they will say well Jason it isn’t that easy. So fricking what?! Life isn’t easy. Get up off your asses and do something to actually better yourself. Eat less crappy food. Take the stairs. Go for a walk after work. Do something but don’t give me excuses anymore
I would add to her list: shower in an RV. They are so small. During a Emergency Response we had in BC for nine weeks, someone gave us their RV for that period we needed it instead of staying in hotels, which had all the survivors. They had upgraded that space to put in enough to fit 2. I was really happy (except the toilet no longer had a door. LOL.).
I mean I'm no tiny thing but even I have to conclude that when your extremely overweight (obese) life's gonna be harder in most areas- especially travel. To expect everyone else to accommodate you is rather ...selfish. Im very much in support of body positivity but I'm also in support of one's health and ,as unpopular as this is currently, an excessively large body is not a healthy body. Two beds pushed together? Might break the toilet seat? A seat belt extension? C'mon, maybe it's time to look more at what needs to be done on her side to increase her quality of life (lose weight) instead of everyone else having to accommodate!
Bored Panda shouldn’t have published this, it’s an important topic but there’s too much grey area and mixed emotions
Honestly, this is a good post to promote healthy habits. Eat good food, not too much and exercise while it's phisically easier to, or else most aspects of life will be harder
Being "body positive" does not mean being in denial. If you are fat, admit it. Then do something about it. It's unhealthy, and as this article makes clear, much of the world is designed for NORMAL-SIZED people (you know, the ones fat people refer to as "skinny"). I am overweight, bordering on fat. I know exactly why. I purged all the clothes from my closet that were too tight, but I am still working to lose weight. If you are fat that is on you (with very rare exception of legitimate medical issues). Here is the world's most successful diet secret that I share with you now: 1. Eat less 2. Move more
Lazy fatasses gonna fatass. Eat less (sugar, fat and carbs), eat healthier (twice as much vegetables as meat and carbs combined on your plate is a good rule of thumb, and fruit) and move more. And it's not genetic but the food industry would love to have you keep thinking this way. They also want to keep you thinking that if you exercise a lot you'll automatically lose a lot of weight but the best way is a diet, combined with daily exercise but that would hurt their sales. This post also gives me first world problems vibes, those poor sobs. https://newsnetwork.mayoclinic.org/discussion/mayo-clinic-q-and-a-genetics-and-weight/#:~:text=ANSWER%3A%20Genetics%20play%20a%20role,may%20work%20best%20for%20you.
"The most common causes of obesity are genetic factors, poor & unhealthy eating patterns, lack of regular exercises, overeating, poor sleep, busy lifestyles, more time on video games, and less time on playground games. One-third of American children are obese, and the number is rising continuously. Overall American obesity rates in 2017-2018 were highest for adults aged 40 to 59, with the rates being 46.4% among men and 43.3 % among women. Obesity Is a Leading Cause of Death in the United States An oft-cited, yet still shocking statistic is that in the U.S., obesity is second only to smoking as one of the leading causes of death. An estimated 300,000 deaths result from obesity in the US every year, though exact estimates are difficult to pin down."
Wow. The comments tell me that BP really hates fat people. Sure, they pretend to be concerned for the person's health. But it's really just thinly veiled disgust.
I'm all for designing things to accommodate a wide range of people. However, people have to understand that it's almost literally impossible to design for the absolute extremes without imposing excessive costs and having to pass those costs on to others. If you're in the 99th or above percentile in weight or height, expect that you're going to have limitations to what you can fit in or through. Although I have no doubt some people act "hostile" towards very large people, the designer of a chair, for example, most likely is not being hostile, they're being practical.
WOW the amount of anti-fat comments in this article makes me sad. BP is usually not the place for all the vitriol, but this really shows the character of some people.
I get that worrying whether you'll fit into airline seating isn't pleasant, but it's not like the person on the seat you use as overflow is any more comfortable with the situation
We SHOULD be body positive and no one should feel pressured to lose weight or have a certain look. BUT - if your weight is impacting your health to the extent you can't work or it will significantly shorten your life span then that's too much. You would probably find that spaces made for the average person won't fit. And to be fair if you are waaaaay over weight to that extent then it's not really the fault of an airline etc..
Wow, fairly surprised at the amount of hate spilt out in this!! How about some Fn empathy? I'm 280lbs, but my size issue is being 6-4 with a 39in inseam, so tall with normal legs... So even the big and tall shirts don't fit correctly. Most of what's listed here applies to me too, but no amount of diet will make me shorter or my shoulders less broad (54 in [137 cm] chest). BTW, 35+ countries and counting.
if u need more space to do anything it's not my or our responsabillity or fault. Do things that you can do. If i have a restaurant and want to buy design chairs with armrest and not a supersize chair, i'm going to do it. The world doesn't have to adapt at you.
I really don't know what to say about this. I'm completely supportive of live now you want as long as you're not hurting others. I'm 42 and was a uk size 6/8 most of my life until I started approaching 40. I'm now a size 14 and have joined a gym and watching what I eat, not because I'm vain but because literally every member of my family older than me is morbidity obese and has a huge list of life threatening conditions because of it. They also have carers and or need help from the younger members of the family to push them in wheelchairs if they want to go out. They all constantly complain about the same issues as this lady as well as parking spaces not being big enough in car parks ( for those of them who aren't registered disabled yet ). For every one of them it has been a lack of willingness to help themselves, something I'm trying to do now as I don't want that life and I definitely to have to have family members care for me because of it
For the record I don't judge people for how they look, I honestly couldn't care less however surely it's not good to encourage extreme weight at either end of the scale. I'm really not trying to shame anyone big or small like I said, ultimately I don't care, but from a health perspective if you're so big/small you can't do day to day things without help or special requirements maybe try and look at some lifestyle changes.
Load More Replies...I believe body positivity isn't abt being ok with being obese, it's about loving your inner self no matter how you look, and if you lose weight you do it because you respect and love yourself and you want to keep your body healthy, not because obesity is wrong, ugly, and you should be ashamed
So, being large is inconvenient in many ways. Seems you can either make others change many things in the world for you, or you can change yourself. We all have to adapt, except fat people apparently?
I have fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis (both hips replaced) and asthma. I'm also slightly overweight. Because I choose to use disabled loos and have difficulty with steps and airplanes etc. people look at me and only see the fat bit. I'm working really hard to lose the weight but my other problems don't help. It's a viscous circle.
i used to be over weight and it was difficult to travel or visit some placed due to my size. and, when i say overweight i was about a size 20-22 so not morbidly obese but definitely large. it was always a little stressful to try to sit in some places or have an experience in a venue because of worrying about if you would fit. that c**p stays with you because even now when i am "more normal" size i check things out. the sad truth is the world caters to the "variables" of norm. if you are too short/tall/fat/etc there are going to be trying times.
Breakfast: pudding or yogurt Twice a day: 5 oz of fish and a cup of vegetables As much wine as you’d like. This is from Matthew McConaughey on how he lost so much weight for his role in “Dallas Buyers Club”… I’m aware, not everyone is the same but portion control and simply eating the right foods is the right steps to take. As a few people mentioned food can be an addiction… I understand addition all to well. It’s up to the individual themselves to change it, not the world around them.
I'm obese. I should eat better and I don't. I have tried to maintain weight loss for most of my life. It's not worked out for me. But go ahead, judge me. But I wonder, even if it is 100% choice - and I suppose purely semantically speaking it is - is there nothing in your life you should change and aren't? I'll wait.
A plane I was on was carrying a large contingent of rugby players from some South Pacific nation. These guys were huuuge. The plane seats were arranged in threes. Each row of three seats had two guys and even then it was a tight squeeze. Must have been real uncomfortable, and how did the seatbelts work?.
Someone want to make a list of things people "struggle" with to maintain a healthy weight? Like not eating everything we might like, skipping a nap for a walk, etc.? Some of these people have medical issues and there's little they can do. For most, though, it's about choices. I live with an obese person and no, we don't eat the same things or amounts, we don't spend our Sundays the same way, so we have different results. They did have it under control for a while, but decided not to put in the effort anymore. Well, those decisions came with consequences. Want different results, make different decisions.
No. Not everyone deserves to travel comfortably. If I take my f350 to England and gouge out half the country because of the small roads am I to blame them for not accommodating my fat a*s truck? No, that's f*****g stupid. I'm pudgy af. We fattys don't deserve s**t. It's literally our fault. I love starch. I love grease. I'm not gonna ask anyone to submit to my s**t lifestyle because I can't control myself. F*****g piggy b***h
Everybody in my family has always been overweight, except for a few of the cousins and myself. Those of us who are of normal weight get treated like we're anorexic, and our weight gets picked on and commented upon more than anybody's. Growing up, this meant that the fat-body was the norm, so I never noticed it in other people, and still don't unless it gets pointed put. I'm socially anxious and barely ever look at anybody, anyway. My only prejudice towards 'fat' comes from noticing that larger women tend to act hateful toward skinny women, because they think the skinnies are out to judge them. For me, it's like, 'Well, I wasn't even looking at you, but I am now if you're going to be mean about it.' I'm trying to say that this wasn't something I was taught, it's a wariness I've developed over time as an adult. I know it's not all larger individuals, but when meeting someone new like that, I find myself hesitating and thinking 'are you going to be nasty to me?' until I know them better. I wish this sort of attitude among larger women wasn't a thing, because it's just perpetuating itself. I don't care what you look like. Most people don't. All I care about is how you treat me. If you act nice, I'll do the same. I think most skinny-to-average women feel the same way I do about this. I've heard others say similar things. And if any a smaller woman has ever been mean to larger woman because of her weight, let me apologize on her behalf so we can all just move forward. You're fine, you look great, but more importantly, I don't care.
We can absolutely talk about health and wellness without fat-shaming (looking at you Bill Mahar). We can be honest about the anatomy, physiology, and chemistry of weight without Septa Unella walking behind with her bell. There is a concept in Deaf culture called "Deaf Gain". It means that practices/technology specifically for the Deaf, Hard-of-hearing, and deaf-blind communities benefit all of society (e.g. closed captioning). Making public space furniture large enough for what is numerically normal now will benefit everyone. The reason First Class on airplanes is so mellow is not because they are more cultured. It's because there is elbow room.
For everyone saying that people choose to be obese… and just being plain vile in the comments. Many people didn’t choose obesity. Just like bulimia and anorexia, binge eating is a formal eating disorder that often requires PHP level treatment for a full recovery. It’s both a self-harm and a comfort behavior… especially if the disordered eating and anxiety/depression are caused by severe trauma….. and it often is. There’s always a reason behind behavior, y’all. No, larger people can’t expect to be accommodated. And at the same time. We as fellow humans can be compassionate towards and contribute to a persons healing rather than being cruel and contributing to that person’s downfall.
If you expect us to accommodate your food addictions, why don't we accommodate cigarette addictions on planes/hotel rooms? Downvoters: this is a real question: Where do we draw the line on "addiction" when it impacts others?
I was thinking this too... I smoke, it's my choice, is everyone going to accommodate my desire to smoke now, or do I have to adhere to the restrictions my habit puts on my life?
Load More Replies...Oh no I've made poor life choices and I'm an abnormal size and don't fit in to standard size things but the rest of the world should change not me because I'm not willing to take responsibility for my choices
Hi Awen, you do know that weight gain isn’t always quote “a result of poor choices?” Many medications that are used to treat mental health illnesses like depression or serious illnesses like cancer can cause significant fluctuations in weight. So people who are battling cancer or who have received a a transplant often have to contend with the stigma of weight gain and loss. Furthermore, patients with limited mobility due to an illness can’t always exercise as freely as they used which can also lead to weight gain. So please don’t be so judgmental when you say all fat people have made poor life choices.
Load More Replies...I think threads like this really show the the true colours of some people. Obesity is not a black or white issue like some commenters think it. Everything from living in a food desert to medications are contributing factors. I’m really disturbed by a lot of comments and think that it was pretty dam ignorant of BoredPanda to post it. This use to be a really open site in the past, but now a lot of trolls are coming out of the woodwork. I’m not a fan of the body positivity movement, I much more prefer body neutrality (working toward the body that is good for you), but some of these comments like”stop eating so much” are flat out ignorant. That’s not how it works.
Load More Replies...I do think airlines should offer a wider seat option. It's more comfortable for the person who needs the space and fairer for the person who'd be sitting next to them.
Stop feeling sorry for your self. Lose weight, and before we hear the I’ve tried but it never works , then you ain’t doing it properly . It’s a simple equations; calories in = calories out . If you put in say 3x more calories than you are burning then you WILL GET FAT. .
I’m afraid here on this post you’re mostly gonna see enablers saying they can’t comprehend the vile hate speech. I can’t have a conversation with anyone that thinks the truth is hate speech. I gave you an upvote to void one of your downvotes. Most people just seem to not want any accountability.
Load More Replies...Fun fact! Obesity can and often is genetic, I am OFTEN in a calorie deficit, and exercise as much as my legitimate physical disabilities allow, (I even get excited when I can do more than normal, because it means I'm not hurting as much) but I'm nearly 500, not for lack of trying, and I started gaining weight as soon as puberty hit. My mom did the same thing, started gaining weight as soon as puberty hit.
Obesity is not often genetic... Where are you getting these facts from? There were so many documentaries and studies done about obesity and most of it is from poor eating habits, poor food choices and lack of exercise when needed. Take US and Japan -- in US nearly 33.3% of the population is obese, in Japan only 3.6% is obese. To say that 33.3% of the population has a genetic condition which causes obesity is absurd. Also, unless you have one of those rare genetic conditions such as Prader-Willi syndrome, you need a lot more factors such as poor eating habits and lack of exercise to complete the picture and be obese simply due to your genetics.
Load More Replies...So many hate comments. Judging by the reactions, some even feel personally attacked. I wonder what is wrong with these people? Insecurities? Uneducated? The need to feel better than others or to judge? The woman is simply showing her difficulties in travelling. Difficulties that could be solved relatively easily. (No one is asking for everything to be to be adapted to overweight people).
You gotta be kidding me. Instead of complaining, make the choice to reverse what you did to your body yourself.
I’ll say it…I’m all for body positivity, and I am fully aware that there are, at times, legitimate health issues (mental and/or physical) that cause obesity. We have to be honest though, there must be a point at which we temper our support by also saying that it is in no way healthy and should not be celebrated for the people that fall outside there being actual medical reasoning behind the obesity. Yes, it’s a grey area, a very broad one, and it’s complicated, but we shouldn’t just throw blind support and celebration behind people without acknowledging hard truths when necessary.
Most people are just fat. No excuses. 80% of their medical problems would go away if they lost weight. (From me, an overweight person.) yes thyroid and fluid edema etc. but MOST people are not fat for those reasons. To back you up, fat and the way we treat others should not go together. Everyone should be treated with respect.
Load More Replies...Coming from an obese person, the world doesn't owe you anything just because you eat yourself into obesity.
You should write a list about traveling when being in a wheelchair! It's harder than this list and we can't do a single thing to be none disabled yet 99% of obese people can make steps to losing weight. Yes I know some people are obese because of medical reasons but the vast majority of obese people can lose weight by eating less/ eating better/ moving more. People can choose to be whatever size they want, but if they are overweight because of a none medical issue then I'm sorry I have little sympathy if they struggle with the above- when they have a way to stop it being an issue.
Thank you for commenting, I came looking for someone else recognizing that accommodations while traveling are way worse for folx with disabilities. They can't or won't accommodate for persons in wheelchairs, people who are blind or even people who are over a certain height. To accommodate the morbidly obese, before fixing other discrimination, would be a slap in the face. I wonder if this woman has ever been asked to ride in the cattle car of a train, because that's how many train networks handle a paid passenger in a wheelchair.
Load More Replies...I don't know... feel a little hesitant about this. I get tall people have similar struggles in flights, toilets, clothing, etc, but they have no choice. My brother is about 270 pounds (120 kg) and about 6'1 feet tall (1.85 mt) and he chooses to be overweight. Even got to the gym so he could eat more. What i'm going to is that, unless you have a condition, being morbidly obese by choise is not rational at all, cause you'll have to adapt to a world suited to certain sizes, not the other way around. Sorry if I sound insensitive, cause I know food can be a coping mechanism to some people struggling with trauma, but just makes no sense to me for you to became a burden to yourself. It's isn't just starving to death, takes a lot of work to get into a more healthier diet, but try to make an effort, is not near good to use oxygen just to walk around or have open scalds around your thights every time you walk. Please take care of yourself a little better, not for others, but for yourself.
The sad irony is that in order to lose weight, people need to exercise which means they need oxygen to walk around and will end up with raw, irritated thighs.
Load More Replies...I see bored panda chose to leave out the comments from tiktok that are more negative. I understand body positivity is an important movement and I fully support it! However, my only concern is when being an individual's weight gets to a number where the person's health is at a significant risk due to increased risk of heart issues and other problems.
Bored Panda seems to do that a lot lately. Very one-sided posts/threads. Like with this one, there is an actual health risk involved. Advertising that obesity is fine (when it is not) can lead to a lot of health risks/fatalities.
Load More Replies...As a former obese person, I just CANNOT get on board with this "body positivity" business, no matter how hard I try. I've been obese pretty much all my life, and I KNEW that wasn't the way it should be, that it was an unnatural state to be in. The last thing I would have ever wanted was for the rest of the world to cater to my inconveniences, because I was the one who was responsible for them, and no one else. I finally lost 42 kilos last year (only 5 to go!), and I can wholeheartedly say that I finally feel fully human now. Even when I was still obese I couldn't get on board with this positivity c**p; it feels forced, and to be honest, like a massive joke.
I lost 34 kgs about 13 years ago, and have weighed the same ever since. Simply a matter of counting calories. It really does make you feel better about yourself.
Load More Replies...As an engineer we learn to solve for the 80%. Often times it’s impossible to solve for 100% of the problems. Air planes for example. What’s more important, passenger comfort, or passenger safety? If we start making aisles and seats and bathrooms larger, we have to make the entire plane larger, which means more fuel/fuel consumption. It means larger planes overall. I’m not an aerospace engineer but that sounds like a lot of problems to solve for a smaller population. Not to mention the economics of replacing an entire fleet of planes for the sake of comfort. I’m all for body positivity, but I’m also for people advocating for themselves. If you know you are afraid to fly, or it’s uncomfortable, find an alternative. Don’t wait in the world to solve your problems for you.
As someone who gained 3* her weight due to antidepressants and antipsychotics the comments on this posts are disheartening. I walk 8500-9500 steps per day, workout 30 minutes per day. Work full-time, have a family that needs my care and attention, plus volunteer work, I don't see what more I can do to not gain weight. Stopping my medication? The weight will melt from my body, but I would loose my family, my job, my drivers license, probably go psychotic or become so suicidal that I truly end life. With my medication I stay what is generally called "normal".
Yuki, don't stop your medication. You're doing fine and all you can do. Please don't take the nasty comments to heart. HUGS.
Load More Replies...My response to a lot of these is along the lines of "yeah, I guess that sucks for you, but what exactly do you expect anyone to do about it?" There's not a lot of room on planes due to, well, the size of planes. Clothing manufacturers/retailers shouldn't be expected to produce/stock clothes for every conceivable body size or shape - from a practical and economic standpoint it makes no sense. I'm tall - not freakishly, but enough that I'm an outlier - and have trouble finding clothes that fit, public transport is awkward, sinks and countertops are all too low causing me chronic back ache from bending down, I am prone to hitting my head on things, but I don't expect the entire world to reconfigure itself to accommodate me - there's a point where making stuff fit *me* better means it'll fit the majority of people worse. If you're overweight and it's causing you difficulties, maybe don't blame the world, maybe consider losing weight instead? At least you have that option.
People claim they want obese people to lose weight for their health and wellbeing. Then they proceed to spew cruelty and contempt, making it very obvious that they never cared about people's wellbeing in the first place. You can wish better for someone, and still treat them kindly.
Well said! I think one of the main points that a lot of commenters are failing to mention is the unwanted weight gain and extreme fluctuations in weight that some medications used to treat chronic illnesses or treat mental health problems cause. I have a friend who won her battle with cancer and a younger cousin who received a heart transplant and are on very potent cocktail of medications to alleviate symptoms. However, many of these medications cause water weight gain and drastic fluctuations in weight. Someone who is battling a horrible disease shouldn’t be stigmatized because their treatments cause weight gain. This is why I’m really working on being less judgmental.
Load More Replies...I want wider airplane seats because I hate it when my neighbor is touching me. And it’s not a size issue. Some people just have no sense of personal space. I don’t want your sweaty flesh pressed up against me for 2 hours. I understand a larger person sometimes can’t help it, but the airline or plane manufacturer can.
I sat in between two men in a flight once and I didn't have an armrest then either.
Load More Replies...I'm all for body positivity. However, I will not accept that someone chooses to stay at an unhealthy weight and expect the world around them to change. For most, it's something you can change--never mind genetic issues, diseases, etc--it's not your height or something that cannot be changed or "fixed".
It's not always a choice, which is a point I keep trying to make to the "calories in calories out" crowd. Some people are overweight because of their choices for sure, some don't have control over the weight they carry and come kindness and compassion aimed at *everyone* would go a long way.
Load More Replies...I am also morbidly obese. I have the same issues the OP does. I can barely walk, and have difficulty breathing. I have diabetes, congestive heart failure, hypertension, lymphoedema, and several other serious health issues. I've had most of these conditions most of my adult life, even when I was of a fairly normal weight. Would losing weight significantly improve my medical conditions? Yes. Would losing weight cure my medical conditions? No. I'm unable to walk more than the length of my house. I have serious breathing problems. I cannot exercise. I think the only chance I have to lose weight is by surgery. Why haven't I gotten the surgery? I'm addicted to food. I'm very afraid that I'd go right back to pushing my stomach into either pulling out the stitches or growing even larger. Do I deserve to be catered to? No. Do I deserve to be fed, clothed, and housed to the best of my ability? Yes. Do I deserve to have access to the world? Yes. Do I deserve to me hated on? No. Do I deserve to be told I'm destroying my body? Why do you want to tell me this? Don't you think I already know? Do I deserve to be called ugly, lazy, or disgusting? I feel ugly, always have. I'm pretty lazy, yes. It's just too damned hard to move, and I have to force myself to try. Yes, I know I'm disgusting. Every time I see any part of myself, I'm disgusted. Will your telling me these things help? No. Do I hate myself? Absolutely. I feel like Shelob. I am very grateful to the few people who can see past the rolls of fat to see me. I am still in here. I just feel completely helpless and worthless. Would losing weight help with my mental state? Yes. Do I need you to tell me this? No.
Well you're more self aware than the vast majority of people I've ever met, me included.
Load More Replies...Okay, as a fat person who falls in the morbidly obese category, let me say that many of the things listed as 'fat people hate' are self-inflicted problems, unless the person has a medical condition. (Narrow aisles, chairs with arms, plane seats and bathrooms, chub rub). Embarrassed to ask for a seatbelt extender? Carry your own, they're easily purchased online. Restaurants often can accommodate if you ask. Places without accessibility? Frustrating but that's life.
Christ, this thread is a dumpster fire. Not supporting someone’s choices doesn’t mean you have to be a d**k.
People that say that obese individuals just need to suck it up and lose the weight need to look up Drew Manning. He trained obese people to get them to lose weight and thought their excuses as to why they couldn't were just whining. He gained 70 lbs with the intention to prove them wrong. He was the one proven wrong. He said the aches and pains along with the depression made it hard for him to even get off the couch. Worse than that, the depression and pain made him want to eat more of all the bad foods because they gave him a moment where he felt good. That's called addiction...and it's hard to escape it. You know your actions aren't healthy, but you do it anyway because it makes you feel good, even just for a little while. And, unlike alcohol and heroin, you can't just give up food entirely...you have to eat. I used to run 4 miles everyday in High School when I was 126lbs. Now I get winded just doing household chores at nearly 300 lbs. It's not all suck it up and do it.
But sometimes it is suck it up and do it. This argument is bull because life is hard for most humans. But some of us choose to suck it up and do it so we can live longer. Do more fun things. Spend a longer life with loved ones. I have never liked working out. Yet I do so because I want to hopefully be around for my daughter as long as I can. Life is hard and sucks for almost everyone. Get some accountability and yes suck it up and make your life better.
Load More Replies...Ah here I am again, being horrified at the hateful comments people have about fat people. Did you know there was a study done but the University of Pennsylvania that found fat shaming doesn't make people want to lose weight - it leads to more weight gain. You know why? Because people who care about their bodies take better care of themselves. Telling someone they're ugly, gross, don't deserve to be in society - what do you think that does to a person's care for themselves? ALSO not everyone is going to be a size 6 with diet and exercise. Genetics are at play for one, also conditions like PCOS, Lipodemia, Hashimoto's, certain medications, lots of other diseases. So, while it might make YOU feel better about yourself to be openly vile to someone because they are fat, it isn't "helping" like you might think it is.
Here's some info about a different study in the UK - same results. https://www.theguardian.com/society/2014/sep/11/fat-shaming-lose-weight-study
Load More Replies...According to the BMI, I am in obese territory. However, I am tall for a woman (5'11"), and have more muscle, my doctor says I am healthy as a horse (a healthy one), great BP, sugar, amd so in, but I have had thyroid issues, easily managed with meds, and we discovered a staggeringly low vitamin D level in 2020, so I take a drop of vitamin D on my tongue everyday. Anyway, my point is I have never had any of these issues. The only problem I have on a plane is that have to sit a bit sideways, or my knees dig into the back of the seat in front of me. The bathrooms are fine. It's kind of weird to think that I may weigh in the same ballpark as some if these people, but am proportioned differently. It's easy to understand why BMI is so criticized.
I loved how most of the BP comments were "just lose weight", and "you did this to yourself" until it came to the part about not being able to hike. Then it was "you're too fat to find a trail that would suit you" and "look at you. Why would you even try it". Is she supposed to lose weight or is she supposed to give up and sit in the corner while thin people have fun? This is why I start to think that when people say that they worry about fat people for their own health they are lying. Otherwise there would be more support when she says she wants to be even remotely active, not "you're fat, why?"
1) she said herself that she needs accessible hiking trails & can't find any. accessible hiking trails *shouldn't* be made, they flatten & often pave over nature to make it easier for people to navigate, but it harms the environment. she shouldn't be pushing for people to destroy nature on her behalf, it's entitled & selfish. 2) if she found herself exhausted & unable to finish a hike, or god forbid she gets injured somehow, a rescue team would have to spend time & resources looking for her & bringing her back, which would likely not be straightforward at all due to her weight. if she was hurt, it may even worsen her injury or prolong the time it takes for her to reach a hospital due to the complications of getting her back to civilization. for someone her size, hiking should be a goal to work towards, not a first step on her journey to losing weight. 3) there are so many other exercises she could do that would be safer for her, where she can take a break or stop without being stranded
Load More Replies...I don't like body positivity - it comes accross as fake. We're not all beautiful, and not all bodies are healthy. What we need is body neutrality. The expectation that all bodies are accepted. That society should make room for people of all sizes and abilities and treat all people with dignity and compassion.
For me body positivity does mean body neutrality instead of people just picking on fat people who they feel less than for some reason. Beauty is indeed in the eye of the beholder, but how many people commenting on weight in this thread would openly bash someone for being "ugly"?
Load More Replies...My comment will probably be buried here somewhere and not be read, but I need to vent after reading through half this list... Body positivity movement is NOT about supporting obesity. Obesity is classified as an illness. It IS an illness. Even if you feel fine by staying obese and acting like it's not a big deal and eating more and more is causing problems to your body and organs that you will only find out when it's too late. Original body positivity is about accepting things you can't change or had an option about. Like - my nose is big, but I won't let it ruin my psychology or run to get a plastic surgery for it. - My ears are protruding? So what! I like them! - my feet are bigger than average woman's? I won't get depressed over it... Not talking about medical conditions that can promote obesity. But 90% of obese people HAVE a choice. So don't come bothering me with your "inconveniences" for YOUR choices
I find all of this very motivating and read it more like a warning label. I wish she would have mentioned the chronic pain one suffers when overweight. I was 50 lbs. over after my second child. The pain of carrying the extra weight was excruciating and my greatest motivator. I can only imagine how physically painful it must be to be morbidly obese. I can't imagine wanting to travel in that much pain.
I'm obese and disabled. The idea that people are obese because of overeating is ridiculous to me. Me and my boyfriend have been living together, eating the exact same, doing the exact dame activities, still he's underweight and continues being and I'm obese and continue being. I never ate half the c**p "normal" people eat because it disgusts me (pizza, fast food, lasagna, all those things known as fat foods I never liked) and even though I did overeat as a child due to food insecurity and fear of starving in the future, when I was around 16yo I started to struggle to eat. I've had people scream at me to eat, and tough I've never been tested for an eating disorder I'm no idiot and I can clearly tell there is something wrong with the way I act towards food. Food disgusts me, I have to eat without thinking about it or else it becomes impossible to eat, I've lived since my childhood thinking eating and hunger is a defect to be surpassed, the more I see people say I'm fat because I eat the
the more I want to stop once and for all. And still I'm obese. And still people will acuse me of overeating, of not wanting to lose weight. When am I not overeating? When my family yells at me that I need to eat or will end up in the hospital being given meds that will make me even fatter? I don't understand. I'm not even that fat as this lady, all issuea I even met in an airport where due to being disabled, not due to beign fat. But what the heck am I supposed to do? I can't even walk to do what I want due to my disabilities how the heck am I supposed to for an activity? I've been on a diet for more than a year and my appearance continues the same even if the scale says otherwise (I supposedly lost around 12-14kg). What am I supposed to do? Eating healthy? Already do eat as my nutritionist said, and I have the advantage of loving it unlike other people that treat that like a chore. Not eating at all? Throwing up what I eat? Tell me the y'all, since you love so much to say being fat is
Load More Replies...What a hard life. You can choose to have that size, I am almost 7 feet tall but skinny. I cant change that, you can. Unbelieveable to cry about your mess, guess what, towels are to short, clothes never fit, fat people always order the xxl seats and i am sitting with my knees touching my ears in the plane seats, pools are not deep enough, toilets are to low, people are watching, tables are too low, beds and blankets are not long enough etc. I really really can feel your pain 🤣
The world accomodates the average person. We’re not going to make everything big because some people are fat. It’s just not feasable. Very tall people have the same problem, and very short people, and very skinny people and people with unusual body shapes, etc. I mean, fat people at least have an option to change. Being tall or short is worse.
But what you're asking for is that people to take responsibility for themselves . But it's easier for them to blame other people.
Load More Replies...I am not obese but overweigth and with a severly damaged ankle and thus limited mobility. I would never DREAM of complaining about lack of accesible hiking paths. There are accessible hiking paths, but of course not everywhere! How could there be? The world does not exist for tourists and we do not have the right to go anywhere we fancy. I cannot climb a mountain, I cannot explore rugged caves, I can't waterski or do anything else that puts a ton of pressure on my ankle. So what? Shall we level all of the world, now so everybody can get everywhere? How about installing a ton of elevators in Grand canyon? Hack roads into every last nature reserve so that anybody can see everything without any effort whatsoever? Oh, and I can't stay in very hot places and in the sun for long. Can someone please build a roof over the Sahara desert? I want to see it and I feel left out.
I find it interesting that BP thinks you should to refer to people as "plus size" rather than "obese" or "fat" but it's fine to refer to others as "skinny" rather than "slim" or "average size".
Being treated as a lesser human being. In the last 18 months I've lost 120lbs. Went from 305 to 185. I am now 'seen' in public... people hold the door for me, people (especially men) give me the right of way, more people initiate small talk, smile at me, etc... Fat people experience microaggressions that 'acceptably' sized people don't. Who I am as a person hasn't changed, my personality hasn't changed, but how strangers treat me in public has. It's really sad to know that people saw you as a less deserving person simply because you were fat. I'm still a size 12 but the amount of skinny privilege I have now is insane.
I'll bet a lot of that behaviour is down to increased self confidence though. There are people who are fat and confident and get the smiles and smalltalk, but if you tried to hide yourself and were not self confident then you're not likely to attract attention.
Load More Replies...Sorry but you choose to eat yourself into obesity and then expect the world to accommodate you?
I'm not sure what the primary purpose of this post is? If its about people judging you by your appearance and lack respect I absolutely agree with you - that's terrible and should stop. Or to highlight issues most people don't think of? Also great, we need to have an understanding to be more compassionate. If it is that everything should be designed to fit all? that's a great ambition but sadly not possible. We can't make everything fit everyone because we all come in different sizes and with different abilities. (But I absolutely think she should be able to bring awareness to her struggles without any hate regardless)
"body positivity advocate" in this case apparently means fat, imposing on other people, and unashamed by their behavior.
Heres the thing. Planes can only get so big. You cant make wider seats and wider isles and bigger bathrooms and bigger everything. if seats get wider, isles get narrower. if isles get wider, seats get narrower.
Seats used to be wider. Airlines just want to pack people in for more money.
Load More Replies...I'm sorry but I don't feel ya. You do not have a fatal disease (in the short run) and it's something you can at least do something about!! Those armwrests are there for a reason, it's not an evil plan to make obese people look bad!! Sorry but I would hate sitting next to you!! I payed for my seat and I don't want to be all squished by you!! Maybe think about how much you are encroaching on other peoples spaces! Book two seats instead of complaining.
the world doesn't owe anyone anything. If everyone who feels wronged would post something like this we'd never find peace... i am sort, like really short do you know all the things i could complain about because "the world is designed for tall people" here in Europe?.. how i can't find clothes, how i can't properly cook in a kitchen without needing something to step up...how my knees hurt because my feet are never touching the ground while sitting.. how people ignore my existence in public transportation, how i can' reach up the shelf in a store.. how i am not allowed on rollercoasters, how everyone always asks me for my ID... I can't change my size.. you as obese person could actually do something about that... and maybe the struggles get a little bit less bothering... or just accept it and stop complaining?
Amen to this! I'm also short. No one is providing me with accommodations to reach things on the higher shelves at the grocery store. No one is making pants that I don't have to pay to have altered. No one is paying for how messed up my knees and back are from wearing heels all of the time so I can be "tall enough" to function. So yeah, I fit in airplane seats and chairs at restaurants but I don't complain about how my feet swing like I'm a small child when I use a restroom. We all deal with our own stuff and I can't wrap my head around how any one particular person gets to think the world should revolve around them (of course I don't think that applies to those that are genuinely disabled but I 100% judge people who get handicapped placards because they're too obese to walk from their car to a store. Maybe if they walked the extra 100 yards they wouldn't be in that situation.)
Load More Replies...Look at all these points listed here. If that doesn’t make you loos weight…what will?
Lose weight. When did it become necessary for the majority to bow down to the small minorities all the time.
I really do get this but at some point we can't make adjustments. Probably planes can use the bulkhead row with only two seats. I do know of hiking trails that are accessible but you have to choose those trails. And stores can at least accommodate some of these things but we can't just reconfigure an entire plane. I'm 195 but used to be 325. I'm just glad I don't need the seatbelt extension any more and my butt fits in the seats.
Normally the people of Bored Panda are some of the nicest on the entire internet. The comments here broke my heart because despite y’all thinking you were funny; you just emphasized this ladies points. If you are fat, it is okay to point and stare and make all the negative comments you would like. Who would have thought a post about a lady seeking to understand her world and help others understand also would have turned the Bored Panda community into the lowest of the low.
This was really nasty and mean spirited of BoredPanda staff to post this. This is such a complex topic that I feel has a lot of “grey” area. One thing that I think a lot of people are missing is the unwanted weight gain and fluctuations in weight that may occur due to medications prescribed for mental health problems and other illnesses like cancer. Many antipsychotics used to treat depression, anxiety, and severe ADHD can cause fluctuations in weight and water weight gain. Furthermore, many of the medications to treat some types of cancer or transplant patients also cause weight gain. People who are battling illnesses should never have to be unfairly judged for weight gain due to medications or treatments.
Load More Replies...I don't think this article is saying that everything needs to be different for her. It's talking about the ways being obese changes the travel experience for her. Whether it's "her fault" or not is a complex discussion. But I'm really annoyed at all the comments here dunking on fat people in general when literally this is about her sharing what her experiences are. You know those #sorelatable things? A lot of this stuff is relatable, and I'm only moderately plus-sized. I fit in an airplane seat, etc. But the towels are tiny, and chub rub is real. Maybe there are ways to respond to these, like bringing a bath sheet or deodorant/baby powder. But are people not allowed to talk about these things without being CONSTANTLY reminded that it's their own dang fault, they're so gross, they shouldn't be that way, etc? There's nothing brave about saying fat people shouldn't be fat. Solutions are when we can listen to people's experiences with compassion and respect them on their journey.
If you're like Lizzo, twerking and moving your a*s around, be my guest. If you need oxigen to get out of the house you really need to do something. Dunno if this lady is, but most of the complaints were "seats are too small", when l think that's the least of her problems right now.
It is not the world that doesn’t fit you, it is you that has grown to a size where you no longer fit the world, you didn’t wake up one day like this it happened over time, with things gradually getting harder instead of thinking “oh I might want to change this” you doubled down and got bigger and bigger. You had warnings that your size was becoming a problem but you chose to ignore them
Remember downvoting on this site is for spam NOT because you have a different opinion. Down vote me to hell and get me banned if it means that much to you. But, have some of these people just tried to ... I dunno... not be fat fockers!? I understand that a small minority actually have genetic or chromosonal disorders... but that is the minority. How about instead of whining that the world doesn't cater to your exact sodding fatness you actually come to the realisation that if you can no longer fit on a toilet seat or manage to drag your body through a turnstyle the problem may be you? Sheesh. I have my problems but I dont expect the whole world to tailor around me. If the entire rest of the world doesn't fit your, solvable, issue then perhaps you are the problem? Stop suger coating it. This woman is fat. She could own it (all the power to her) or complain. If you own it you accept that you ain't going to fit and make your own adaptions. If you complain you fail to recognise that you are the problem. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.
Yeah guys, just remember, no matter our difference in opinions, the downvote should only be used for when people are using hate speech or they are bots as this does get people banned!
Load More Replies...I hope you are also trying losing weight while doing all of these travels. Obesity is dangerous
So here's a question. If being inclusive of extremely fat people is expected as the norm does this mean there is no cut off weight? For example if 1, 10 or 100 people at 700 lbs want to travel by plane then is it the airline's fault for not having facilities for them? Being rude or nasty to anyone about their looks is totally unacceptable but being fat shouldn't be encouraged. In the same way being too thin, smoking, and other life choices that effect your health should not be encouraged.
No one is encouraging it...we're just saying stop pretending to be concerned for people you don't know. Someone's weight is not something that should be ridiculed by others, whether they are thin or big.
Load More Replies...A big assumption is that weight is 100% due to personal choices or like an addiction. I know a lot of women who are currently struggling with or have come out of addictions. Do you think they don't know that it's messed up their life? Would you tell a former addict, struggling to find a job or housing or getting her kid back from foster care, that she has no right to complain and that her situation was all her own fault? Do you think someone in that situation would "appreciate the honesty", or would she go and confide in her counselor and sponsor that no matter how much progress she makes, people will always see her as a loser first and a human second. Now apply that logic to weight. Even IF it is a parallel case, "honestly" and "helpfully" pointing out their life choices while they are in the very process of addressing them is NOT brave, or honest, or progressive. It is just one more way you see someone as their problem first and a human second.
I know I've been commenting a lot, but please have some compassion. Let's assume for a moment that weight is 100% a result of personal choices (which it isn't, but let's set that aside.) So exercising is an important step, right? That means walking (chub rub, supportive shoes that fit, accessible paths), swimming (pool ladders, towels, swimsuits that fit), gym equipment (weight-bearing seats), exercise clothes (that are big enough), and most importantly, ENCOURAGEMENT in fitness spaces instead of derision, are all super important in that journey. So let's not all dump on people when we point out that these are very real barriers! Not that they can't be overcome, but that we can stop blaming people who are trying to exercise for pointing out that there are extra barriers for the people who might need it most.
I'm six feet tall. I can't change that. I accept that there are situations that will be uncomfortable for me, so if I choose to put myself in the situation, I deal with it. No whining, no complaining, and I certainly don't blame everyone else. Fat is not a disability and one should not expect, demand or think one "deserves" anything.
Now I feel like I need to ask a Little Person their struggles while traveling. Imagine how difficult and unsafe it must be for an adult who is under 5ft
Yes, and they ACTUALLY have no/ very little control over their size, unlike this woman
Load More Replies...I understand the difficulties of being super-obese, I was once too. Hopefully you will recognize the major issue is your health not the inconvenience of being super obese. I had symptoms of a heart attack and was admitted to the hospital. My treadmill study reproduced the heart attack symptoms. My doctor admitted me on Thanksgiving day for a work up with a cardiac cath. He told me if it was positive I would have bypass the next day. Luckily I didn't have blocked arteries but I did have angina chest pain caused by super-obesity. I was 42 and had four young kids. It scared me enough that I dieted and exercised and lost 185 pounds. I don't think we should shame super obese people, but they need to face the health reality of the demands their weight is putting on their hearts and bodies. You may be ok in your 20s and 30s but it will catch up to you.
We are all of us one bad day away from facing catastrophic metabolic issues that mean we're screwed re: weight/mobility/etc. OK? Brain tumor screwed it up for my mom. I had an accident and gained 25 pounds before relearning to walk. Job loss so you can only afford the cheapest (crappiest) food. Psychological trauma. Reaching a certain age. The day your DNA kicks in and overrides your desires. Just be kind! That could be you! Judge only as you want to be judged ----- with compassion. Or STFU. Signed, a medical doctor, from the US.
I'm not a skinny person and I'd like to think I'm fully supportive of body positivity, but this isn't it! The lady is obese, and in my opinion she's promoting unhealthy choices.
Plus size & super-obese are NOT the same. This woman needs one hell of a reality check. She is not plus sized, she's super sized & the rest of the world shouldn't cater to her because she can't control her eating habits. Wtf. Buy your two seats on the plane like you stretched your body to need, & don't climb the ladder you couldn't climb down from since you couldn't possibly see the next step past your stomach & sit down like you've been doing.
i don't care until they don't take up my space. I'm more pissed with manspreading all over
I think it’d be fantastic if every place made larger seats and seating areas. Imagine having more room to stretch out and not being squished in? This is a win for people of all sizes.
As a builder, I can say that probably won’t happen. Just like airlines most businesses care about that bottom dollar. Building or making bigger costs more money. So you probably won’t be seeing that.
Load More Replies...I'm sorry but if you're so worried then why not do something about it if you can
This was indeed the dumbest post. I get that certain fat people have medical conditions, take medication etc that makes them over weight. I get that. But those people are the vast minority in the obese world. I’m really starting to get sick of all the lack of accountability. If these things worry you when you travel and you have the ability to better yourself, then for farts sake change your life. Quit making excuses and change. And for all the enablers and body positivity activists on this site. Y’all should be ashamed of yourself too. Being obese is not good for your health. Mental, physical or other wise. Stop making excuses for these people. They are killing themselves faster than an average sized person. And for all the rest they will say well Jason it isn’t that easy. So fricking what?! Life isn’t easy. Get up off your asses and do something to actually better yourself. Eat less crappy food. Take the stairs. Go for a walk after work. Do something but don’t give me excuses anymore
I would add to her list: shower in an RV. They are so small. During a Emergency Response we had in BC for nine weeks, someone gave us their RV for that period we needed it instead of staying in hotels, which had all the survivors. They had upgraded that space to put in enough to fit 2. I was really happy (except the toilet no longer had a door. LOL.).
I mean I'm no tiny thing but even I have to conclude that when your extremely overweight (obese) life's gonna be harder in most areas- especially travel. To expect everyone else to accommodate you is rather ...selfish. Im very much in support of body positivity but I'm also in support of one's health and ,as unpopular as this is currently, an excessively large body is not a healthy body. Two beds pushed together? Might break the toilet seat? A seat belt extension? C'mon, maybe it's time to look more at what needs to be done on her side to increase her quality of life (lose weight) instead of everyone else having to accommodate!
Bored Panda shouldn’t have published this, it’s an important topic but there’s too much grey area and mixed emotions
Honestly, this is a good post to promote healthy habits. Eat good food, not too much and exercise while it's phisically easier to, or else most aspects of life will be harder
Being "body positive" does not mean being in denial. If you are fat, admit it. Then do something about it. It's unhealthy, and as this article makes clear, much of the world is designed for NORMAL-SIZED people (you know, the ones fat people refer to as "skinny"). I am overweight, bordering on fat. I know exactly why. I purged all the clothes from my closet that were too tight, but I am still working to lose weight. If you are fat that is on you (with very rare exception of legitimate medical issues). Here is the world's most successful diet secret that I share with you now: 1. Eat less 2. Move more
Lazy fatasses gonna fatass. Eat less (sugar, fat and carbs), eat healthier (twice as much vegetables as meat and carbs combined on your plate is a good rule of thumb, and fruit) and move more. And it's not genetic but the food industry would love to have you keep thinking this way. They also want to keep you thinking that if you exercise a lot you'll automatically lose a lot of weight but the best way is a diet, combined with daily exercise but that would hurt their sales. This post also gives me first world problems vibes, those poor sobs. https://newsnetwork.mayoclinic.org/discussion/mayo-clinic-q-and-a-genetics-and-weight/#:~:text=ANSWER%3A%20Genetics%20play%20a%20role,may%20work%20best%20for%20you.
"The most common causes of obesity are genetic factors, poor & unhealthy eating patterns, lack of regular exercises, overeating, poor sleep, busy lifestyles, more time on video games, and less time on playground games. One-third of American children are obese, and the number is rising continuously. Overall American obesity rates in 2017-2018 were highest for adults aged 40 to 59, with the rates being 46.4% among men and 43.3 % among women. Obesity Is a Leading Cause of Death in the United States An oft-cited, yet still shocking statistic is that in the U.S., obesity is second only to smoking as one of the leading causes of death. An estimated 300,000 deaths result from obesity in the US every year, though exact estimates are difficult to pin down."
Wow. The comments tell me that BP really hates fat people. Sure, they pretend to be concerned for the person's health. But it's really just thinly veiled disgust.
I'm all for designing things to accommodate a wide range of people. However, people have to understand that it's almost literally impossible to design for the absolute extremes without imposing excessive costs and having to pass those costs on to others. If you're in the 99th or above percentile in weight or height, expect that you're going to have limitations to what you can fit in or through. Although I have no doubt some people act "hostile" towards very large people, the designer of a chair, for example, most likely is not being hostile, they're being practical.
WOW the amount of anti-fat comments in this article makes me sad. BP is usually not the place for all the vitriol, but this really shows the character of some people.
I get that worrying whether you'll fit into airline seating isn't pleasant, but it's not like the person on the seat you use as overflow is any more comfortable with the situation
We SHOULD be body positive and no one should feel pressured to lose weight or have a certain look. BUT - if your weight is impacting your health to the extent you can't work or it will significantly shorten your life span then that's too much. You would probably find that spaces made for the average person won't fit. And to be fair if you are waaaaay over weight to that extent then it's not really the fault of an airline etc..
Wow, fairly surprised at the amount of hate spilt out in this!! How about some Fn empathy? I'm 280lbs, but my size issue is being 6-4 with a 39in inseam, so tall with normal legs... So even the big and tall shirts don't fit correctly. Most of what's listed here applies to me too, but no amount of diet will make me shorter or my shoulders less broad (54 in [137 cm] chest). BTW, 35+ countries and counting.
if u need more space to do anything it's not my or our responsabillity or fault. Do things that you can do. If i have a restaurant and want to buy design chairs with armrest and not a supersize chair, i'm going to do it. The world doesn't have to adapt at you.
I really don't know what to say about this. I'm completely supportive of live now you want as long as you're not hurting others. I'm 42 and was a uk size 6/8 most of my life until I started approaching 40. I'm now a size 14 and have joined a gym and watching what I eat, not because I'm vain but because literally every member of my family older than me is morbidity obese and has a huge list of life threatening conditions because of it. They also have carers and or need help from the younger members of the family to push them in wheelchairs if they want to go out. They all constantly complain about the same issues as this lady as well as parking spaces not being big enough in car parks ( for those of them who aren't registered disabled yet ). For every one of them it has been a lack of willingness to help themselves, something I'm trying to do now as I don't want that life and I definitely to have to have family members care for me because of it
For the record I don't judge people for how they look, I honestly couldn't care less however surely it's not good to encourage extreme weight at either end of the scale. I'm really not trying to shame anyone big or small like I said, ultimately I don't care, but from a health perspective if you're so big/small you can't do day to day things without help or special requirements maybe try and look at some lifestyle changes.
Load More Replies...I believe body positivity isn't abt being ok with being obese, it's about loving your inner self no matter how you look, and if you lose weight you do it because you respect and love yourself and you want to keep your body healthy, not because obesity is wrong, ugly, and you should be ashamed
So, being large is inconvenient in many ways. Seems you can either make others change many things in the world for you, or you can change yourself. We all have to adapt, except fat people apparently?
I have fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis (both hips replaced) and asthma. I'm also slightly overweight. Because I choose to use disabled loos and have difficulty with steps and airplanes etc. people look at me and only see the fat bit. I'm working really hard to lose the weight but my other problems don't help. It's a viscous circle.
i used to be over weight and it was difficult to travel or visit some placed due to my size. and, when i say overweight i was about a size 20-22 so not morbidly obese but definitely large. it was always a little stressful to try to sit in some places or have an experience in a venue because of worrying about if you would fit. that c**p stays with you because even now when i am "more normal" size i check things out. the sad truth is the world caters to the "variables" of norm. if you are too short/tall/fat/etc there are going to be trying times.
Breakfast: pudding or yogurt Twice a day: 5 oz of fish and a cup of vegetables As much wine as you’d like. This is from Matthew McConaughey on how he lost so much weight for his role in “Dallas Buyers Club”… I’m aware, not everyone is the same but portion control and simply eating the right foods is the right steps to take. As a few people mentioned food can be an addiction… I understand addition all to well. It’s up to the individual themselves to change it, not the world around them.
I'm obese. I should eat better and I don't. I have tried to maintain weight loss for most of my life. It's not worked out for me. But go ahead, judge me. But I wonder, even if it is 100% choice - and I suppose purely semantically speaking it is - is there nothing in your life you should change and aren't? I'll wait.
A plane I was on was carrying a large contingent of rugby players from some South Pacific nation. These guys were huuuge. The plane seats were arranged in threes. Each row of three seats had two guys and even then it was a tight squeeze. Must have been real uncomfortable, and how did the seatbelts work?.
Someone want to make a list of things people "struggle" with to maintain a healthy weight? Like not eating everything we might like, skipping a nap for a walk, etc.? Some of these people have medical issues and there's little they can do. For most, though, it's about choices. I live with an obese person and no, we don't eat the same things or amounts, we don't spend our Sundays the same way, so we have different results. They did have it under control for a while, but decided not to put in the effort anymore. Well, those decisions came with consequences. Want different results, make different decisions.
No. Not everyone deserves to travel comfortably. If I take my f350 to England and gouge out half the country because of the small roads am I to blame them for not accommodating my fat a*s truck? No, that's f*****g stupid. I'm pudgy af. We fattys don't deserve s**t. It's literally our fault. I love starch. I love grease. I'm not gonna ask anyone to submit to my s**t lifestyle because I can't control myself. F*****g piggy b***h
Everybody in my family has always been overweight, except for a few of the cousins and myself. Those of us who are of normal weight get treated like we're anorexic, and our weight gets picked on and commented upon more than anybody's. Growing up, this meant that the fat-body was the norm, so I never noticed it in other people, and still don't unless it gets pointed put. I'm socially anxious and barely ever look at anybody, anyway. My only prejudice towards 'fat' comes from noticing that larger women tend to act hateful toward skinny women, because they think the skinnies are out to judge them. For me, it's like, 'Well, I wasn't even looking at you, but I am now if you're going to be mean about it.' I'm trying to say that this wasn't something I was taught, it's a wariness I've developed over time as an adult. I know it's not all larger individuals, but when meeting someone new like that, I find myself hesitating and thinking 'are you going to be nasty to me?' until I know them better. I wish this sort of attitude among larger women wasn't a thing, because it's just perpetuating itself. I don't care what you look like. Most people don't. All I care about is how you treat me. If you act nice, I'll do the same. I think most skinny-to-average women feel the same way I do about this. I've heard others say similar things. And if any a smaller woman has ever been mean to larger woman because of her weight, let me apologize on her behalf so we can all just move forward. You're fine, you look great, but more importantly, I don't care.
We can absolutely talk about health and wellness without fat-shaming (looking at you Bill Mahar). We can be honest about the anatomy, physiology, and chemistry of weight without Septa Unella walking behind with her bell. There is a concept in Deaf culture called "Deaf Gain". It means that practices/technology specifically for the Deaf, Hard-of-hearing, and deaf-blind communities benefit all of society (e.g. closed captioning). Making public space furniture large enough for what is numerically normal now will benefit everyone. The reason First Class on airplanes is so mellow is not because they are more cultured. It's because there is elbow room.
For everyone saying that people choose to be obese… and just being plain vile in the comments. Many people didn’t choose obesity. Just like bulimia and anorexia, binge eating is a formal eating disorder that often requires PHP level treatment for a full recovery. It’s both a self-harm and a comfort behavior… especially if the disordered eating and anxiety/depression are caused by severe trauma….. and it often is. There’s always a reason behind behavior, y’all. No, larger people can’t expect to be accommodated. And at the same time. We as fellow humans can be compassionate towards and contribute to a persons healing rather than being cruel and contributing to that person’s downfall.
If you expect us to accommodate your food addictions, why don't we accommodate cigarette addictions on planes/hotel rooms? Downvoters: this is a real question: Where do we draw the line on "addiction" when it impacts others?
I was thinking this too... I smoke, it's my choice, is everyone going to accommodate my desire to smoke now, or do I have to adhere to the restrictions my habit puts on my life?
Load More Replies...Oh no I've made poor life choices and I'm an abnormal size and don't fit in to standard size things but the rest of the world should change not me because I'm not willing to take responsibility for my choices
Hi Awen, you do know that weight gain isn’t always quote “a result of poor choices?” Many medications that are used to treat mental health illnesses like depression or serious illnesses like cancer can cause significant fluctuations in weight. So people who are battling cancer or who have received a a transplant often have to contend with the stigma of weight gain and loss. Furthermore, patients with limited mobility due to an illness can’t always exercise as freely as they used which can also lead to weight gain. So please don’t be so judgmental when you say all fat people have made poor life choices.
Load More Replies...I think threads like this really show the the true colours of some people. Obesity is not a black or white issue like some commenters think it. Everything from living in a food desert to medications are contributing factors. I’m really disturbed by a lot of comments and think that it was pretty dam ignorant of BoredPanda to post it. This use to be a really open site in the past, but now a lot of trolls are coming out of the woodwork. I’m not a fan of the body positivity movement, I much more prefer body neutrality (working toward the body that is good for you), but some of these comments like”stop eating so much” are flat out ignorant. That’s not how it works.
Load More Replies...I do think airlines should offer a wider seat option. It's more comfortable for the person who needs the space and fairer for the person who'd be sitting next to them.
Stop feeling sorry for your self. Lose weight, and before we hear the I’ve tried but it never works , then you ain’t doing it properly . It’s a simple equations; calories in = calories out . If you put in say 3x more calories than you are burning then you WILL GET FAT. .
I’m afraid here on this post you’re mostly gonna see enablers saying they can’t comprehend the vile hate speech. I can’t have a conversation with anyone that thinks the truth is hate speech. I gave you an upvote to void one of your downvotes. Most people just seem to not want any accountability.
Load More Replies...Fun fact! Obesity can and often is genetic, I am OFTEN in a calorie deficit, and exercise as much as my legitimate physical disabilities allow, (I even get excited when I can do more than normal, because it means I'm not hurting as much) but I'm nearly 500, not for lack of trying, and I started gaining weight as soon as puberty hit. My mom did the same thing, started gaining weight as soon as puberty hit.
Obesity is not often genetic... Where are you getting these facts from? There were so many documentaries and studies done about obesity and most of it is from poor eating habits, poor food choices and lack of exercise when needed. Take US and Japan -- in US nearly 33.3% of the population is obese, in Japan only 3.6% is obese. To say that 33.3% of the population has a genetic condition which causes obesity is absurd. Also, unless you have one of those rare genetic conditions such as Prader-Willi syndrome, you need a lot more factors such as poor eating habits and lack of exercise to complete the picture and be obese simply due to your genetics.
Load More Replies...So many hate comments. Judging by the reactions, some even feel personally attacked. I wonder what is wrong with these people? Insecurities? Uneducated? The need to feel better than others or to judge? The woman is simply showing her difficulties in travelling. Difficulties that could be solved relatively easily. (No one is asking for everything to be to be adapted to overweight people).
You gotta be kidding me. Instead of complaining, make the choice to reverse what you did to your body yourself.