Fairytales usually end with the newlyweds living happily ever after but who still reads Hans Christian Andersen when Reddit offers one trainwreck of a story after another?
Recently, u/Olya_roo made a post on r/AskReddit, inviting people to share what wedding moment made them think the couple is not going to last long. At first, it may sound odd. After all, a wedding is a celebration of love. A new beginning. Not the end. Plus, there's enough booze to drown all the uncertainty at least until the day after. But that's not always the case.
As of today, the post has 85K upvotes and 24K comments, many of which describe the red flags that sometimes arise on the big day. Below are some of the most noteworthy ones.
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Prior to my wedding I’d asked my husband to practice dancing with me because I’m uncoordinated, due to a disability. He blew me off and said we’d be fine. As we were dancing, he spoke in my ear, not even quietly. “What are you doing? What’s wrong with you? You’re embarrassing me!!” We lasted 2 years. Leaving was the best decision I ever made.
I'm impressed it lasted two years. I would have disolved the marriage right after the dance
I was at a wedding when a phone went off during the ceremony.
In the middle of exchanging vows.
It was the grooms.
He took the call.
They are divorced now.
u/Olya_roo told Bored Panda they never expected this thread to become that popular.
"I am always interested in people's experiences, especially private ones. So, l asked this question [out of curiosity]," they said.
"I was really surprised by people's answers — like 60% of them were extremely detailed and private; you can really feel the pain in some of them."
Just before the wedding started my mother turned to me and said “You are making the biggest mistake of your life, if we get in the car and leave now I will never say another word”
She was right…
Groom slept with another groomsman the night before he married his wife. Wanted to go to a gay bar at the bachelor party. Came out two years into the marriage. Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
The groom took the stupid cake thing to an extreme. The bride had given him his bite, and mushed a little on his chin or nose. He then took a piece and MASHED it into her face so hard that I was expecting her to end up with a bloody nose. Cake and frosting got up her nose, in her eyes, down the front of her dress, etc.
The bride had to go get cleaned up, had her makeup re-done, and was ugly-crying within an hour of saying, "I do." He didn't give a damn.
Divorce rates in the US have been dropping since the 1980s. Today, it is thought that approximately 42-45 percent of marriages in the country end in divorce.
A recent analysis of marriage and divorce data by researcher Phillip Cohen of the University of Maryland revealed an 18 percent reduction in the country’s divorce rate between 2008 and 2018.
According to experts, this change can be explained by the following points:
1. Cohabitation leads to a yes or no before marriage;
2. People are getting pickier;
3. There’s not as much of a rush;
4. Those who are married are discovering more options than divorce.
When she went alone on her honeymoon, because she booked a trip to the caribbean despite her newlywed husband having a severe sun allergy
Don't know what happened... Sat down with bride and groom, filling out the contract. Got the deposit. He stood up, said forget it, and walked out. 2 months later I get told the wedding is off, 3 months later she calls to rebook, different groom. Day of the wedding I am at the church... Got the final payment the week before... No one shows... No one, just me and the DJ.
When the maid of honor professed her love for my brother during her toast at my brother's wedding... and her husband walked up to the head table, picked her up and carried her away before she could embarrass him further. They lasted about 3 months after that. My brother and his wife on the other hand are still happily married 20 years later.
A lot of the stories shocked u/Olya_roo, and some left them in legit terror. "[At one point], I wanted to call the ambulance and have some of those insane people locked in a hospital," they said.
"This thread was a really fun experience, and I am so honored to see people still replying to it, and people ... contacting me."
Two friends of mine got married, and when they gave their vows, the guy started laughing at the part about being faithful. Oops.
When the groom went in for the kiss after their vows and the bride presented her cheek instead. They divorced less than a year later after it was discovered she had been cheating on him pretty much their entire relationship.
Why did she go through with the marriage, if she was seeing someone else? I don't understand why people do this?
Bride disappears right after dinner for about an hour. After she returned, groom's father comes up and asks for the mic. Proceeds to announce to the entire place that his son's new bride was just upstairs schtupping her ex boyfriend, and that the marriage is over.
I am surprised at how many stories like this there are. Weddings bring out such intense, raw emotions that people just can't seem to control themselves. You would think the bride could get it together for what is supposed to be the happiest day of her life.
I was maid of honour. Me, best man and the couple went into a separate little room to do the signing stuff. Bride excused herself to go the bathroom and the groom started making pretty mean remarks about her cooking (sth she's passionate about) to the officiary. She came back, heard they were talking about cooking family meals together and gave him the warmest smile, thinking he had praised her. He scoffed awkwardly and changed the topic. That always stuck with me. He wasn't laughing WITH her but AT her, behind her back.
They lasted 7 months.
A fun light-hearted dance with the groom followed by a close and slow dance with her male best friend.
Lasted 18 months and now she's living with the "friend".
These things happen in plain sight and many are way too naive about them. Not saying that men and women could not be friends together, just saying that they very rarely can be THAT (slow-dancing, emotionally and physically intimate) kind of friends together without it causing problems to actual spouses.
Portuguese wedding. Fist fight broke out at the head table during the reception. Between two groomsmen. They were arguing about which of them had slept with the bride first. Groom was oblivious.
He came home from work early one day two years later and caught her in bed with another man. Surprised it took that long.
Midnight buffet was amazing though.
At my aunts wedding.
Pastor: “Repeat after me…. For Richer and for poorer” The bride: “ for richer and for richer”
Yea they didn’t last long
The part of the vows where you pledge monogamy? The audience laughed
The groom had a “best woman” instead of a best man. Nothing wrong with that, but her toast left the whole room in awkward silence because she was clearly in love with him.
I think that's quite sad.. Not the best time to make that speech.. But still quite sad..
When they disappeared for half an hour during the reception. They were both “saving themselves for marriage” and were desperate to bone down. Which is a fine thing to want. But it turns out that was more or less the main reason they got married. They made it almost a year.
She told me two days before that she found her fiancé annoying and that she didn’t like him and that he was AWFUL in bed.
She was visibly, endlessly uncomfortable at the rehearsal wedding/dinner combo.
Then she sobbed the ENTIRE morning, day-of. She ended up not getting any makeup done cause she wouldn’t stop scream-sobbing and refused to get dressed, stalling the wedding ~35 minutes.
She then said 45 minutes of “vows” that she had prepared (9 pages of things like inappropriate vows to friends and family, his parents and sisters, none of them her husband), and then ALMOST didn’t say “I do”. Managed to get a, “uh, yeah, okay, yeah I do” out of her almost a full 60 seconds after she was supposed to say anything.
I could go on for HOURS, but it was the most painful and awkward wedding I’ve ever been to. I’ve got my money on 10 months. We’re 1 month in.
When the groom started off his speech by saying, “we all know I didn’t want to get married but we’re here for bride and child we had together_.”
1 year, 3 months later they were finished.
The bride told her bridesmaids that she didn’t actually want to get married. Multiple times. No one told the groom until after the divorce.
If you don't want to get married.....then why not say so....if you don't feel like you can be honest with your fiancé, why say yes?
I used to work for an event center that hosted a lot of weddings pre-Covid.
After one ceremony I saw the groom slap the butt of one of the bridesmaids in the hallway. She laughed and with a big smile said, "Oh Jeremy, you'll never change!"
When there's name calling. I particularly cringed at "it's because we so get each other and are so comfortable that he can call me dumb slut as a nickname." They didn't last the year.
I have a friend like that. His girlfriend calls him demeaning name and he's totally fine with that but she doesn't allow it from him. They're like best friends, he says. If my best friend did that, I would end the friendship straight.
An infamous one for me was leaving a venue late one night and as I’m walking to the train I can see the bride down an alley, on her knees with the best man.
I was the best man at a wedding a few years back. At the rehearsal dinner, his future in-laws were treating him like cr*p. They were bossing him around, making him do cr*p, and talking down to him. They didn’t let him hang out with his groomsmen afterwards while the bride went out and got drunk.
They are now divorced.
Had an old boss who was divorced. He told me once "I should have known it wasn't going to last when the only happy moment I had on my wedding day was when I snuck out to smoke weed with my buddies in the parking lot."
When he smashed the cake in her face and hair, then went off drinking with his buddies. In 12 weeks, she filed. Good thing I didn't buy an expensive gift.
One where the wedding was all about the groom promoting his band. He even "sang his bride a song" that was literally just him showing off his vocal range with some classic piece. She stood up and joined him on stage half way through and he looked annoyed that he had to share the limelight. They lasted about 2 years (he was sleeping with the other vocalist in the band.)
The most beautiful wedding I've been to ended in divorce. Venue was where the groom's father is buried and he cried as he made his vows to the bride there.
Turned out he'd been cheating on her for months and they divorced a while later. Something so repugnant about marrying someone you're cheating on practically over your father's grave. To date it's the only wedding I've been to that ended in divorce.
That's just disrespectful to the father, family and bride. The groom is an ah
The entire bridal party, including parents of the wedded couple, entering in to a betting pool of how long the marriage would last, at the wedding reception.
IIRC the best man won (price is right rules) at 14 months
My husband was the best man at a wedding. The bride was a nightmare. Not just during the wedding, but in general everyday life. All of the friends hated her, and she had no friends of her own.
We knew it was doomed when: during the portraits, the bride was making everyone miserable as can be. The groom said (exact words):
"I'll just send her to therapy. And, if that doesn't work, we can just get divorced."
He complained she was mean to him throughout their dating life. The day before the wedding all of the groomsmen and the grooms friends told him not to marry the girl. Like straight up.
They lasted less than a year.
Hmm. I get that you don't want to marry someone who is mean. I know my ex used to tell everyone how awful and mean I was, until one day when we were with a group of friends and he he lost "control" and socked me in the face for frowning at him. You could have heard a pin drop. Thing was that was normal for me. But always take it with a grain of salt: advise your friend but don't just blindly hate the other party. His friends used to give me so much s**t til he showed his true colours (his friend group changed somewhat after that as you can imagine)
When he raised his eyebrows and gave her a knowing look during the “for richer or for poorer” portion of their vows.
For context, he was a newly drafted pro athlete and she was a big fan of his signing bonus
One of my friends got married, afterwards she looked at me, crying, and said " what did I do? ". They were separated by the time the plane landed from their honeymoon. He was a good guy, she was a mess.
The beta fish in the flower centerpieces lasted longer than the marriage.
Groom got into a fist fight with the father of the bride. Split after 4 months.
Context- Groom and brides dad (actually most people in these families if I'm honest) have pretty aggressive drinking problems. Father in law has always hated him. I wasn't around for what actually set it off but it ended when the bride got in the middle, got an elbow in the eye and the happy couple left for the night. This was in rural Canada. Not Letterkenny, but basically Letterkenny. I'd say the father in law won the fight though.
I was at the wedding of one of my mum’s oldest friends and she clearly had more fun dancing with the best man after the wedding.
Long story short, they dated for a while after the divorce.
The groom and best man had a dancing routine for getting into the church ceremony and they got nearly halfway through it and I guess the groom felt they hadn't received much applause and wows from us the attendees and decided to go back to the entrance and start all over. Sigh...
My brother’s ex-wife. Throughout the exchange of vows, she was looking at everyone but my brother, making sure all eyes were on her. Later, she instructed the photographer (a family friend who was cheap) to “mingle” and get shots of people “being happy”. Within 10 minutes, she’d summoned the photographer back shouting, “Whose wedding is this?! I meant get shots of people being happy for me.”
The bride and groom did the first dance then spent the rest of their reception completely apart from each other getting s**t-faced with their own separate friend-groups. The only other dancing all night was the bride dancing with her high school friends, the father-daughter dance and the mother-son dance, during which the groom was crying. The best man's speech didn't mention the bride at all and basically boiled down to "Groom, you're married now but our bond is older and stronger, all of our hunting and fishing trips together are the best thing in our lives, can't wait for more." Such a sad, desperate atmosphere. They made it a little over one year.
I was kindly included in a last-minute plus-one to the wedding of a family friend who I'd never met before. At the rehearsal dinner (or the German equivalent, the Polterabend) the guests smashed ceramic and porcelain items on the ground. I was fresh in Germany, so this was all pretty out of context and frightening, but my boyfriend explained that it's a tradition - reminding the couple that life is sometimes difficult and you have to work together to clean it up.
The bride kind of half-heartedly motioned to the groom to sweep it up. He did a little bit, then just moved on to talk to his friends, leaving most of the shards strewn around the yard. Additionally, I don't think I saw the couple talk to each other once over the next three days of celebrations.
It was a gorgeous wedding, and I'm so grateful that I was invited (really good way to begin living in a new country), but it wasn't surprising to hear that they'd divorced a few years later.
During one wedding I was seated at a table with about ten people. Someone asks how we all know the bride and groom. First girl says he's an ex of the groom. Second girl says she's an ex of the groom. Third girl says: 'Omg is there anyone here who hasn't slept with the groom !?'. Turns out I was the only one who hadn't...
It's hella ballsy to invite 9 exes to your wedding and seat them all the same table. Wow!
Load More Replies...I went to a wedding where the pastor was the groom's father and he kept going on about how the bride was to always serve the groom. She should always have dinner ready with a smile, be ready to fulfill her duties in the bedroom, etc. Nothing about what the groom needed to do. Was super awkward with children of all ages there.
Seems like marriage has lost the value it once had. Better to be single or just be in a relationship than go through these shits. But don't be fooled by these posts. There are still many beautiful marriages out there. Just getting fewer by the day.
I think people seem to put much more focus and effort on the wedding than on the marriage itself and tbh that´s just a day. It might be a great day or all your plans might fail and the day go completely amiss but that´s not the marriage. The marriage is what you do everyday to your spouse and how you live together and make stuff work while dealing with everything else. Some os these seem like people who focused on the wedding but forgot it´s a marriage they´re supposed to be getting into...
Load More Replies...Bride left the reception and had the marriage annulled when they argued over her young son going on the honeymoon with them. They had been having an affair for years behind her husband's back before she eventually divorced her husband so they had plenty of time to organise and agree on details regarding her son accompanying them or not. Incidentally the groom married and divorced 3 more times after. The bride never remarried.
Hi everyone. Hey, if you are planning on getting married, I would very much appreciate if you could just cancel those plans and send me the money you would use for your wedding. I could really use it right now. Thanks! (And don’t forget to include a thank you note to me about how I saved you from making a big mistake)
My happy wedding tale: As a punk rocker, my hair was FLAMING PINK. At my sister’s wedding rehearsal dinner, groom’s family said mean things just loud enough to hear but not to my face. That night, I rinsed it to black, wore it tastefully pulled back with ribbons as I stood next to her. My sister CRIED with happiness -- she would NEVER has asked me to change but I did it for her, not for them. Did not want my clown pink to ruin her wedding photos. Shame the marriage only lasted a few years. Guess the family found other things to hate.
Went to a wedding where the bride disappeared during dinner. She had been sick for hours and blamed it on too many cigarettes and too little food during the day. We knew there must have been something else - like her realising what she just did. She wanted to be married „before 30“, to whomever it seemed as none of her friends liked him. While one of grooms colleagues drove her home at 8 p.m. groom got drunk and shouted „Bride would have loved to see you all party hard“. We left at 9 p.m. Things started to go downhill in their honeymoon and they separated 3 months after the wedding. Two years later or so, bride married his colleague who drove her home. 2 kids and 15+ years later, they‘re still together.
Weddings are such high-stress high-money events that I think people feel "trapped" by them, and forget the marriage. Friend of mine decided to "go through with it". The minister mentioned the word Divorce 13 times in the sermon (we counted) and then they were done within 5 years (domestic violence, infidelity).
When he said "Rachel" instead of "Emily".. oh no, that was on TV
Many years ago I was asked to be the best man for a wedding between two friends who decided to get married at the spur of the moment. So they went to one of those “marriage parlors”. They had to get the license and had a few drinks as they waited for the results. During the ceremony when the preacher asked the groom if he “takes this woman to be his lawful wife” he replied “Yeah. But I’m drunk”. Didn’t last a year. Both been dead for years.
Flying Solo is AWESOME! Enjoy, embrace, and love it; you're the only You you have. 🙂
Load More Replies...I think I knew my brother's second marriage was over the day he married the girl. He said his "I do," went to the bar after the ceremony wrapped up, lifted a glass to his friend and said "Holy Crap! I did it again." Like he regretted the decision immediately. Took about 5 years, but they finally divorced. He married again, divorced and is now working on marrying wife number 4.
We need to remember that MANY cultures stress the necessity of marriage even if it's evident that it won't result in a happy marriage. Sad but true and it explains about half of these.
I have to admit my wedding was memorable for some of the wrong reasons. After we said our vows my wife got really drunk and used her hand to cut the cake, through her wedding ring at me and hit my daughter in the stomach and left a scar. Her friend took her home while I stayed at my friends house the wedding was at and partied all night, plus it was 4t of July so watched fire works. While the wedding was not the greatest, we are still married after 7 years. Not the greatest moments but we are happily married still.
Was my 6th anniversary yesterday. Not all bad weddings end in divorce... Wanted to marry on the beach we met. I couldn't take any days off but we HAD to get married the day before he turned 30, to fulfill a lifelong promise he had made to his childhood friend. It rained during vows, which drowned the sound of everyone recording. Then we got a few pics before packing up to have the reception at his mother's church rather than stay for fireworks at the beach. I had not planned a reception so I didn't know what to do. We played some board games with nieces than cut the cake and ate some half burned BBQ. Then we went home to our boat where the storm lasted another few days.
I was best man at my brothers wedding, what a s**t show that was. Walking up the aisle she was crying, and you could tell they weren't tears of Joy, ugly, ugly crying. The vows were very stiff from her side. Didn't turn up for the reception dinner. During the reception hung around with the three work friends she invited, and didn't even try to talk to anyone. The first dance was awkward as all he'll. Wedding was a Saturday, brother went to hand in the marriage certificate at the registry office on the Monday and by the time he got back to the house she had ran off. Leaving my brother to look after her daughter. Still managed to last two more years
My cousin said she was surprised her little sister was getting married first and then a year later got married. The groom's mother wore black to a wedding. They actually ended up getting the marriage annulled.
Some of these people probably would have done well with an OT birthday bash...
Marriage is a partnership. When you actually have a true partner, and friend that loves and supports you, you want to make eachother an official member of your family. They are your closest family member and laws recognize that. If they get sick or badly hurt and the hospital only allows family for example. All the rights and privileges that come with being related is just one benefit to it. Don't let all the nasty stories out there make you disillusioned and jaded, some people are very happy to have that partnership and bond.
Load More Replies...During one wedding I was seated at a table with about ten people. Someone asks how we all know the bride and groom. First girl says he's an ex of the groom. Second girl says she's an ex of the groom. Third girl says: 'Omg is there anyone here who hasn't slept with the groom !?'. Turns out I was the only one who hadn't...
It's hella ballsy to invite 9 exes to your wedding and seat them all the same table. Wow!
Load More Replies...I went to a wedding where the pastor was the groom's father and he kept going on about how the bride was to always serve the groom. She should always have dinner ready with a smile, be ready to fulfill her duties in the bedroom, etc. Nothing about what the groom needed to do. Was super awkward with children of all ages there.
Seems like marriage has lost the value it once had. Better to be single or just be in a relationship than go through these shits. But don't be fooled by these posts. There are still many beautiful marriages out there. Just getting fewer by the day.
I think people seem to put much more focus and effort on the wedding than on the marriage itself and tbh that´s just a day. It might be a great day or all your plans might fail and the day go completely amiss but that´s not the marriage. The marriage is what you do everyday to your spouse and how you live together and make stuff work while dealing with everything else. Some os these seem like people who focused on the wedding but forgot it´s a marriage they´re supposed to be getting into...
Load More Replies...Bride left the reception and had the marriage annulled when they argued over her young son going on the honeymoon with them. They had been having an affair for years behind her husband's back before she eventually divorced her husband so they had plenty of time to organise and agree on details regarding her son accompanying them or not. Incidentally the groom married and divorced 3 more times after. The bride never remarried.
Hi everyone. Hey, if you are planning on getting married, I would very much appreciate if you could just cancel those plans and send me the money you would use for your wedding. I could really use it right now. Thanks! (And don’t forget to include a thank you note to me about how I saved you from making a big mistake)
My happy wedding tale: As a punk rocker, my hair was FLAMING PINK. At my sister’s wedding rehearsal dinner, groom’s family said mean things just loud enough to hear but not to my face. That night, I rinsed it to black, wore it tastefully pulled back with ribbons as I stood next to her. My sister CRIED with happiness -- she would NEVER has asked me to change but I did it for her, not for them. Did not want my clown pink to ruin her wedding photos. Shame the marriage only lasted a few years. Guess the family found other things to hate.
Went to a wedding where the bride disappeared during dinner. She had been sick for hours and blamed it on too many cigarettes and too little food during the day. We knew there must have been something else - like her realising what she just did. She wanted to be married „before 30“, to whomever it seemed as none of her friends liked him. While one of grooms colleagues drove her home at 8 p.m. groom got drunk and shouted „Bride would have loved to see you all party hard“. We left at 9 p.m. Things started to go downhill in their honeymoon and they separated 3 months after the wedding. Two years later or so, bride married his colleague who drove her home. 2 kids and 15+ years later, they‘re still together.
Weddings are such high-stress high-money events that I think people feel "trapped" by them, and forget the marriage. Friend of mine decided to "go through with it". The minister mentioned the word Divorce 13 times in the sermon (we counted) and then they were done within 5 years (domestic violence, infidelity).
When he said "Rachel" instead of "Emily".. oh no, that was on TV
Many years ago I was asked to be the best man for a wedding between two friends who decided to get married at the spur of the moment. So they went to one of those “marriage parlors”. They had to get the license and had a few drinks as they waited for the results. During the ceremony when the preacher asked the groom if he “takes this woman to be his lawful wife” he replied “Yeah. But I’m drunk”. Didn’t last a year. Both been dead for years.
Flying Solo is AWESOME! Enjoy, embrace, and love it; you're the only You you have. 🙂
Load More Replies...I think I knew my brother's second marriage was over the day he married the girl. He said his "I do," went to the bar after the ceremony wrapped up, lifted a glass to his friend and said "Holy Crap! I did it again." Like he regretted the decision immediately. Took about 5 years, but they finally divorced. He married again, divorced and is now working on marrying wife number 4.
We need to remember that MANY cultures stress the necessity of marriage even if it's evident that it won't result in a happy marriage. Sad but true and it explains about half of these.
I have to admit my wedding was memorable for some of the wrong reasons. After we said our vows my wife got really drunk and used her hand to cut the cake, through her wedding ring at me and hit my daughter in the stomach and left a scar. Her friend took her home while I stayed at my friends house the wedding was at and partied all night, plus it was 4t of July so watched fire works. While the wedding was not the greatest, we are still married after 7 years. Not the greatest moments but we are happily married still.
Was my 6th anniversary yesterday. Not all bad weddings end in divorce... Wanted to marry on the beach we met. I couldn't take any days off but we HAD to get married the day before he turned 30, to fulfill a lifelong promise he had made to his childhood friend. It rained during vows, which drowned the sound of everyone recording. Then we got a few pics before packing up to have the reception at his mother's church rather than stay for fireworks at the beach. I had not planned a reception so I didn't know what to do. We played some board games with nieces than cut the cake and ate some half burned BBQ. Then we went home to our boat where the storm lasted another few days.
I was best man at my brothers wedding, what a s**t show that was. Walking up the aisle she was crying, and you could tell they weren't tears of Joy, ugly, ugly crying. The vows were very stiff from her side. Didn't turn up for the reception dinner. During the reception hung around with the three work friends she invited, and didn't even try to talk to anyone. The first dance was awkward as all he'll. Wedding was a Saturday, brother went to hand in the marriage certificate at the registry office on the Monday and by the time he got back to the house she had ran off. Leaving my brother to look after her daughter. Still managed to last two more years
My cousin said she was surprised her little sister was getting married first and then a year later got married. The groom's mother wore black to a wedding. They actually ended up getting the marriage annulled.
Some of these people probably would have done well with an OT birthday bash...
Marriage is a partnership. When you actually have a true partner, and friend that loves and supports you, you want to make eachother an official member of your family. They are your closest family member and laws recognize that. If they get sick or badly hurt and the hospital only allows family for example. All the rights and privileges that come with being related is just one benefit to it. Don't let all the nasty stories out there make you disillusioned and jaded, some people are very happy to have that partnership and bond.
Load More Replies...