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30 People Share The Heartbreaking Moment They Realized Their “Friend” Was Fake
Unfortunately, not all Eureka moments in life relate to positive realizations. Sometimes they lead one to awakenings that can hurt them immensely, such as learning that a person they considered a friend is not actually worthy of the title.
Members of the ‘Ask Reddit’ community recently discussed such moments. They shared stories ranging from infuriating to heartbreaking on a thread started by u/Aesthetik_1 and covered all sorts of unfortunate events involving so-called friends. Scroll down to find them on the list below and consider this a reminder to check on the person that’s been by your side through thick and thin.
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#1
Back in my first year of college, I used to have a group of friends (like 7 dudes with me included). We always hang out together and we're used to have this "group chat" where we discuss about anything from class subjects to random things. After a year, I noticed that one of the guys (let's just call him Randy) keeps getting excluded; Not invited/informed to group hangout while they're talking smack behind his back. And the "unofficial leader" of the group actually made a whole new group chat, inviting everyone (myself included) except Randy without his knowledge.
I know what it feels to be left out, I experienced that in Middle school and it's really awful. I stopped hanging out with them and I starts hanging out with Randy. He's quite eccentric but a very good person at heart. We've been friends for more than 6 years, and he still got my back
DennyS (denzoren) 1 year ago
"Quite eccentric but a very good person at heart" are 90% of the time very cool people to hang out with.
RELATED:
#2
When you decide to let them be the one to reach out. And you never hear from them again.
David 1 year ago
they might not be 'fake'. They might be introverts. I rarely reach out except to a couple of very close friends. I always think things like - maybe they are busy - I don't know when is a good time to call. I have started to try to be more proactive with a couple of other friends but it does not come naturally for me even though I'm glad when they reach out to me.
#3
I had been giving rides to a girl I thought was my friend. To and from school in high school. She wasn’t really suppose to ride with other teens but due to her mothers work hours we could easily pull this off. I thought we were close.
One day while on the way home my brakes went out. We were about 2 blocks from her gated neighborhood. I managed to roll in safely and parked at her house to call a tow truck.
She flipped. Told me I couldn’t stay. She knew my brakes were not working as she had also been terrified when we couldn’t stop. She said she wanted to go to a movie that weekend with other friends and her mom would ground her if she saw me at the house. I offered to lie and say I only stopped there as my car malfunctioned on my way home. I *had* to pass her neighborhood on my way home anyways.
She refused. Started to scream at me. She didn’t care what happened I had to go. Started to call the guard at the front gate to tell them I had broken in and was threatening her.
I left her and that friendship that moment. I managed to roll my car slowly to a mechanic not too far away but never forgot the s**t feeling of knowing I could have been seriously hurt and she wouldn’t have cared. She wanted to see a movie. She had the nerve to sheepishly call and ask me a couple days later if I could give her a ride to school. Told her I was too busy and no longer had time… after all I wanted to help her obey her moms rules. She rode the bus til she graduated.
Fluffy mommy panda 1 year ago
What an awful person. And had the guts to call and ask for a ride to school after that. Some people.
#4
I had this friend in school. Each year there was a funfair in our city, all students received vouchers for a drink and something to eat. This friend complained the whole day that she had no one to accompany her to the funfair. So, stupid me offered to go with her.
Once we arrived we met another friend of hers. And another, and another... until we were a group of 5 or 6 people. I didn't know anyone and was basically just walking behind them. This friend took me aside and said, "My friends think you are annoying, and we would like you to leave."
It was a pleasure to see that she failed her exams a year later.
#5
Him and his girlfriend asked if they could spend Christmas Day with me, my husband and our children because otherwise they’d be at home alone all day with only junk food to eat (neither of them could cook)
I organised transport over and home again after (neither of them could drive either) I cooked us all a full Christmas dinner. I organised fun games and activities so it wouldn’t be boring.
My friend and his girlfriend didn’t offer to help with anything, not cooking, not serving, not cleaning up, and not paying. They wouldn’t play the games and weren’t interested in the activities. They just wanted to sit on the sofa and eat. Then came the complaining…
They complained because we had Pepsi instead of Coke.
They complained that we had semi-skimmed milk instead of full fat.
They complained that my husband wouldn’t play video games with them (he was busy with the kids while I cooked)
They complained that there wasn’t mashed potatoes as well as roast potatoes.
They complained because they wanted different vegetables from the ones I was serving.
They didn’t thank us for anything. Needless to say I was glad when they went home. Friendship didn’t survive long after that.
Hanako-Kun 花子くん 1 year ago (edited)
Who raised them!? *They* ask to come over to the ops house then complain?? Op and their family was kind enough to let them over and they didn't even get a thank you 😡
#6
When I got back (to the US) from a trip to South America, I had $7 to my name. The next morning a 'friend' asked me to go to breakfast, so I could tell him about my trip. I said I didn't have any money and couldn't afford it. However, he said that's ok and off we went. When we arrived at the breakfast joint and the server came over to get our order, my 'friend' pointed at me and said "he isn't getting anything".
#7
Finding out they have an inner-circle group chat but I'm the only one not in it.
#8
When I finally opened up about what was really going on in my life, and she said that it was all too much for her to hear about. She straight up never called me back. We used to be best friends.
Hard as pumpuli 1 year ago (edited)
My ex- ”best friend” did not invite me to her wedding, quote ”you are not part of my ”intact friend circle”, what ever that was. I should have seen it coming. Everything was always about her. I listened, never the other way around.
#9
When I got really sick. Very few came to help.
Katie Lutesinger 1 year ago
People show their true colours when you lose your money or your health. For better or worse.
#10
Her response to finding out my husband had been cheating on me was to say to me “oh yeah, I definitely could have slept with him if I wanted to”
#11
It was several "friends." I realised that their idea of fun was to just constantly insult me. Not playful "roasting", full on constant insults.
#12
At lunch, she was sitting with her boyfriend, I was sitting with our friend circle. She came up to me, guilted me into sitting with her and her boyfriend, and then proceeded to ignore me for the rest of lunch.
She didn't care about me, she just didn't want me talking to the friend circle that she had abandoned for her boyfriend. When I pointed this out to her, she called me a jealous b***h.
Ah, high school. How I don't miss thee.
#13
When plans with me became tentative should something better with someone else come up. That s**t hurts.
Mabelbabel 1 year ago (edited)
I had an ex that I'd occasionally meet up with, and over coffee one day, he told me his latest girlfriend had dumped him and he didn't know why. She'd got upset because he'd told her to keep Saturday night free because there was a 60% chance he'd be able to see her-basically, he'd see her if nothing better came along. He had done this all the time to me-he had his priorities, and I was way down the list. Plans made with me were completely flexible and non-fixed, and I was expected to hang around and wait, and then fill in at short notice if his other, more important plans fell through. 20 years later, he was still doing it and wondering why he was single in his 50s. I'd told him at the time we split that his behaviour was a big part of the split, but he seemed genuinely incapable of accepting it was unreasonable. Don't make someone your whole focus if you're just an option to them.
#14
When he only called me when he needed something. It didn't hit me until much later.
DennyS (denzoren) 1 year ago
I've had this happen before, it sucks but the earlier you recognize it the better.
#15
Riding in my best friend’s car, in our early 20s, telling her about how my relationship with my mother was becoming so toxic and crumbling before my eyes- she interrupted me to ask that I be quiet during her favorite part of the song that was on the radio. When that part was finished, she told me I could resume my story. I was pouring my heart out. I was young and devastated, and even then I knew that was a really messed up thing to do and it instantly changed the way I viewed her as a friend. We were going on seven years of close friendship, and it was finished in that one car ride.
Kevin Sutton 1 year ago
Yeah, when someone talks over the intro to your favourite song, it completely ruins it
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Lene 1 year ago
A good friend would have turned off the radio and focus more on what OP was talking about, imo. I have had many acquaintances (how do you spell that???) that were viewed as weird and best to stay away from. The thing is that I gave them a chance to tell me about what was up and usually they were just undiagnosed with some mental issue or neurodivergence. One dude could literally clear the whole bar, just by showing up. He didn't do any harm -he was just being a bit weird and socially awkward. I had a talk with him about it and ended up having an agreement that i could tell him when he was being too weird and he'd calm down on his weirdness as best he could. Worked like a charm. Iirc he later found that he was on the autism spectrum. And people just didn't give him a chance. Poor guy.
InfiniteZeek 1 year ago
I mean back in the day when a song played on the radio you either listened to it or you missed it, I can see her friend doing.....NOPE, just kidding, even back then, your "friend" would be a twatfuckle.
Kare Deter 1 year ago
The reason you "don't have anyone at all willing to listen to me b***h about anything" is glaringly apparent.
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#16
When I was r**ed my friends all disappeared. The guy who r**ed me wasn’t even in our friend circle and went to jail for another crime. It wasn’t he said she said it was very obviously r**e. I lost all of my friends and when I confronted a couple of them after going to therapy they said “we believed you we just didn’t want to deal with the DRAMA” I had never even talked about the r**e with them I was just less entertaining when we hung out because I was traumatized. These are people who I let stay at my house whenever, I had a good job so I bought them things, I was always the driver and always the person they would turn to when they needed something. It was a hard lesson to learn at 16 and I didn’t actually learn it then, I just internalized it and believed I was overreacting and I had done something wrong. I still believe the best in everyone but man, that belief gets shaken quite a lot. Now I’m friends with my husband and kids and don’t bother with anyone else.
BrownTabby 1 year ago
BP, do you have ANY idea how disrespectful it is to censor the word “rāpe” IN A POST BY A RĀPE VICTIM?!
#17
When he stole my checkbook, forged my signature and took money out of my account. This was after I let him live with me and my family for two years after his parents kicked him out in high school
#18
Anytime I had good news, she'd find an INSTANT way to downplay it.
"I got the job!" (Ha! You're excited about *that* hourly???)
"My crush just texted me about hanging out!" (Right. Like *you* have money to do cool s**t.)
"The gym is working -- I'm down 8 lbs!" (It's water weight, sweetie, chill.)
Literally nothing that made me happy could come outta my mouth and be celebrated in kind. This was someone I grew up thinking was "so cool," but only made me feel like s**t to be around. I finally broke away and it pissed her off so bad, she actively spilled my secrets and "tea" to folks who had no business knowing that much stuff about me.
Oh well.
#19
When I was babysitting her kids things were going great. We would hangout all the time...have movie nights and just talk and chill. But the second she no longer needed a babysitter was the second I got kicked to the curb. No explanation...not even a text back. Some people will act like your best friend until they no longer need you. Their loss though.
#20
When she tried to poison me with drano, she was moving away the next day hoping she would not get caught, she was just way too insistent I eat lunch she made, tipped me off.
Katie Lutesinger 1 year ago
...holy s**t. We somehow went from accounts of "friends" acting like ungrateful, bullying jerks to *attempted murder*. I sincerely hope this psycho didn't go on to actually kill someone, because if they try it once they're going to try it again.
#21
When they loved the idea of me shining, but behind their shadow, I could never do or achieve anything above them, and when I did, they would get jealous.
David 1 year ago
that is sad. in a friendship and especially a romantic relationship I prefer it if the other person does better / is richer / whatever. It frequently means they have more self confidence and financial independence which in turn means they are more likely to be my friend for the right reasons rather than because they "need" me.
#22
When the only time we hung out is when I initiated making plans.
Aroace tiger (she/they/he) 1 year ago
I mean I'm bad at asking people to do things .. and planning
#23
Friend “A” warned me that Friend “B” was openly disrespectful, even hostile when speaking of me when I wasn’t around. They got into an argument. Friend B sent me screenshots of their conversation to get me on their side but there seemed to be whole sentences missing. When I asked for clarification, they called me dumb. Friend A showed me all the missing messages where they called me much worse than just “dumb”. Friend B lost two great friends for good after that.
#24
After 20 years of friendship with a woman I once knew well, I went through a divorce.
She almost immediately stopped speaking to me, left her husband of 25 years and moved out, *and made a run for my soon-to-be ex-husband*
My soon-to-be ex wanted nothing to do with her romantically and flatly rejected her advances. She eventually crawled back to her husband, where she is today
As I later found out, her 3 siblings had sat her down for an intervention, asking her what the hell she was thinking for hurting her nice husband and her good friend (me) - and for potentially ruining her childhood friendship with my ex, as their families were old friends in this city and went way back. She pretended not to know what they were talking about and carried on with her plan
At the time I was blindsided; alternately crushed - and PISSED - at her betrayal and for her decades-long false friendship with me. The realization that she wasthisclosetome for 2 decades just to be close to my husband(!!!) is still mind bending, 7 years later
But I have to laugh at the social embarrassment she brought upon herself and her current state-of-misery
My now-ex is remarried and I am dating. He and I co-parent and get along very well, and our kids are loved by us all. His friendship with her is no longer
She has eaten herself into a ball that is almost as wide as she is tall. *You reap what you m***********g sow*
#25
Talking behind my back about private stuff.
Jill Bussey 1 year ago
My MIL did this; talking with random people who then tried to talk to me about it. Like, how did they know this stuff?
#26
I had one friend go and tell my boss I was job hunting.
Had a few steal from me.
Had one blame me when she stole something.
I've had quite a few deliberately trigger my trauma to the point where I stopped telling people about it.
Blue Morpho Butterfly 1 year ago
I'm sorry, it sounds like lots of your friends have sadly turned out to be a******s☹️
#27
Constantly “one ups” me. A real friend is happy for you.
DennyS (denzoren) 1 year ago
I know someone like this, it's the absolute worse having a conversation with them about anything.
#28
ALL she talks about it herself and her problems. Granted she has a a lot but never asks about me or my life until she realizes she just bypassed my attempt to want to talk about something in my life bothering me and continued to talk about herself.
Katie Lutesinger 1 year ago
I had a "friend" who was like that. I'm a naturally empathetic person so I was prepared to listen and offer suggestions on how to deal with his problems, but he had no interest whatsoever in taking my advice or indeed doing anything about said problems other than complain. Eventually I realised he was just a whiny self-pitying toxic a*****e.
#29
When he would only take and never even offer to give back. Always with the "I left my money at home, but ill totally pay you back." Never paid anything back, ever. Other friends and I would call him out on it but there was always an excuse. Eventually he screwed over another mate at a gig they went to (only thing he paid for was a drink, had another mate even pay for his ticket in with some BS reason), so we all collectively decided we don't need or want him around anyway.
He's barely made an attempt to keep in touch in 10 years and we certainly haven't.
#30
When they didn't remember our conversations and just talked for the sake of talking
What do you think ?
Strawberry Pizza 1 year ago
Stop giving us these depressing stories, BP. what happened to the old bored panda? None of this influencer, AITA, 51 reasons why life sucks, rubbish... this site is supposed to have lighthearted content to give you a bit of a break from the real world!
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
That you! If we wanted this other drama, we would go to those sites.
Load More Replies...
Red Reilly 1 year ago
When I was starting out in my career and was broke, I used to suggest to my 'friend' to go to the local park which was really nice and we could chill in the sun and have some cans. Found out he was mocking slagging me off to people. 'He can't even afford to go to the pub'. Cut that guy out. He was Toxic.
WonderWoman 1 year ago
Had two different friends in and after high school that if I mentioned or appeared interested in a guy, they would go all out to get him, in front of me. Yeah, great for the self-esteem
Donna Peluda 1 year ago
I used to be in a very active doggy group. We would meet for walks and for drinks BBQ with our Dogs. One Sunday walking with the group the daughter about 13, asked me what church I went to. I told I didn't go to church. She was surprised and told her that not everybody goes to church or believes in religion. That I am an atheist, since then I haven't been invited to any of their social events.....
Mandy Delaforce (PC Girl) 11 months ago
There is no such thing as a "best friend". Friends are just associates that you like hanging out with. Trust no one. Put up walls of defence. Learn to love yourself and be alone. It's a lot nicer and generic socialising keeps the loneliness away. ;)
FaceTime Audio 1 year ago
“Friend” from summer camp spent a summer being cold to me, but I couldn’t tell because I’m autistic and unable to read social cues well. The next summer, they were outright cruel. They were friends with all my “friends”, so they were always around. If I tried to talk, they’d call me annoying and tell me to shut up (I can be annoying, but never intentionally. I’m unaware, and I want to be told politely so I can keep relationships, but this wasn’t polite). I basically just couldn’t talk because of them. They insulted me constantly. Said that my favorite shirt “looked like a trash bag” and made me “look like a pervy uncle” while my whole tent agreed. I felt awful but I still couldn’t know what was happening, so I asked them straight up if they disliked me, and they said that they did, and had for years, but pretended to be friends with me because they didn’t feel like they had enough social cred to ditch me, but that this summer they did, and I was too dumb to notice.
FaceTime Audio 1 year ago
This person lied about everything, too. Said they had synaesthesia that made them have a color inside their head that doesn’t exist anywhere else, that they were hyperlexic because they would instantly read any word that they saw (self-diagnosed, of course). Different friend group told me to leave because no one liked me, I was too formal, I was too casual, they were “finders” and I didn’t fit in (whatever that means), and the kicker: that I “deadnamed them three times in the past week alone”. Except that I didn’t know their deadname. I hadn’t ever been told it, and I didn’t use it once because I wouldn’t ever do that and because I had no idea what their deadname was at the time (they told me when accusing me of calling them by it).
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shankShaw deReemer 1 year ago
My best friend for over sixteen years told me she couldn't be in my wedding because she couldn't afford the $100 dress. Her parents would have paid for it because her parents were well off. I cut her off after that. It was very hurtful, and I'm still a bit bitter.
Strawberry Pizza 1 year ago
Stop giving us these depressing stories, BP. what happened to the old bored panda? None of this influencer, AITA, 51 reasons why life sucks, rubbish... this site is supposed to have lighthearted content to give you a bit of a break from the real world!
Multa Nocte 1 year ago
That you! If we wanted this other drama, we would go to those sites.
Load More Replies... Red Reilly 1 year ago
When I was starting out in my career and was broke, I used to suggest to my 'friend' to go to the local park which was really nice and we could chill in the sun and have some cans. Found out he was mocking slagging me off to people. 'He can't even afford to go to the pub'. Cut that guy out. He was Toxic.
WonderWoman 1 year ago
Had two different friends in and after high school that if I mentioned or appeared interested in a guy, they would go all out to get him, in front of me. Yeah, great for the self-esteem
Donna Peluda 1 year ago
I used to be in a very active doggy group. We would meet for walks and for drinks BBQ with our Dogs. One Sunday walking with the group the daughter about 13, asked me what church I went to. I told I didn't go to church. She was surprised and told her that not everybody goes to church or believes in religion. That I am an atheist, since then I haven't been invited to any of their social events.....
Mandy Delaforce (PC Girl) 11 months ago
There is no such thing as a "best friend". Friends are just associates that you like hanging out with. Trust no one. Put up walls of defence. Learn to love yourself and be alone. It's a lot nicer and generic socialising keeps the loneliness away. ;)
FaceTime Audio 1 year ago
“Friend” from summer camp spent a summer being cold to me, but I couldn’t tell because I’m autistic and unable to read social cues well. The next summer, they were outright cruel. They were friends with all my “friends”, so they were always around. If I tried to talk, they’d call me annoying and tell me to shut up (I can be annoying, but never intentionally. I’m unaware, and I want to be told politely so I can keep relationships, but this wasn’t polite). I basically just couldn’t talk because of them. They insulted me constantly. Said that my favorite shirt “looked like a trash bag” and made me “look like a pervy uncle” while my whole tent agreed. I felt awful but I still couldn’t know what was happening, so I asked them straight up if they disliked me, and they said that they did, and had for years, but pretended to be friends with me because they didn’t feel like they had enough social cred to ditch me, but that this summer they did, and I was too dumb to notice.
FaceTime Audio 1 year ago
This person lied about everything, too. Said they had synaesthesia that made them have a color inside their head that doesn’t exist anywhere else, that they were hyperlexic because they would instantly read any word that they saw (self-diagnosed, of course). Different friend group told me to leave because no one liked me, I was too formal, I was too casual, they were “finders” and I didn’t fit in (whatever that means), and the kicker: that I “deadnamed them three times in the past week alone”. Except that I didn’t know their deadname. I hadn’t ever been told it, and I didn’t use it once because I wouldn’t ever do that and because I had no idea what their deadname was at the time (they told me when accusing me of calling them by it).
Load More Replies... shankShaw deReemer 1 year ago
My best friend for over sixteen years told me she couldn't be in my wedding because she couldn't afford the $100 dress. Her parents would have paid for it because her parents were well off. I cut her off after that. It was very hurtful, and I'm still a bit bitter.
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